Living

Realization

Your present experience, as it is

Scott Kiloby

The Kiloby Group

©2012 The Kiloby Group. All rights reserved.

The Living Realization text is copyrighted material. Please do

not distribute, copy, or post online. You have purchased a

single end-user license for your personal use only

Cover photo: Evan Ludes

Design: Mark Peerman

Editor: Fiona Robertson

Disclaimer: The Living Realization website and text is for

educational purposes only and is not intended in any way to be a

replacement for, or a substitute to, qualified medical advice,

diagnosis, or treatment, or as a replacement for, or a substitute

to, psychological advice, diagnosis or treatment, or therapy from

a fully qualified person. If you think you are suffering from a

medical or psychological condition, consult your doctor or other

appropriately qualified professional person or service

immediately.

CONTENTS

Introduction to Living Realization .................................................. 1

The Main Invitation ........................................................................... 5

The Middle Way ................................................................................. 9

Basic Points ....................................................................................... 12

Chapter One: Recognizing Awareness ......................................... 15

Chapter Two: Appearances ............................................................ 40

Chapter Three: Thoughts ............................................................... 57

Chapter Four: Emotions ................................................................. 77

Chapter Five: Sensations ................................................................. 87

Chapter Six: States ........................................................................ 102

Chapter Seven: Experiences ........................................................ 107

Chapter Eight: Oscillation ........................................................... 113

Chapter Nine: Inseparability ....................................................... 122

Chapter Ten: The Unfindable Inquiry ....................................... 139

Chapter Eleven: The Middle Way .............................................. 161

1

INTRODUCTION:

Living Realization

YOU KNOW WHEN you are ready for a message like Living

Realization. You feel it to the very core of your being. You’re

pulled towards it by an unmistakable knowing that there is

something deeper, something more to life than what you

currently believe or perceive.

You have come to this message because its words

resonate with you on a level deeper than the mind. There is a

peace within you that you know is present, but that seems

somehow buried under the noise of life, with its personal drama

and constant seeking towards the future. Now, you are ready to

move beyond these self-centered patterns. You are ready to

begin looking into your present experience in a deep and

specific way. You are ready to see why it is that you suffer, why

you seek, and why human life contains so much conflict.

Perhaps you’ve suffered with self-loathing, doubt,

depression, anxiety, addiction, over-thinking, or some other

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2

emotional or psychological issue. Maybe you have always felt

uncomfortable in your own skin. Maybe you have experienced

conflict with others, or painful regret and guilt in relationships.

If you are like most humans, you’ve experienced yourself as

incomplete or deficient in some way.

For some of us, life has been fine. No real

breakdowns. No intense hardships. We may have experienced

some degree of contentment or even moments of real freedom.

Yet even those of us who have had pretty good lives often carry

a subtle, ongoing, and gnawing sense that an important piece of

life’s puzzle seems somehow just out of reach.

Many of us have searched for life’s answers everywhere

but here and now. We thought the answers were in the future,

so we sought them there. We looked for relief in relationships,

jobs, material success, self-help programs, drugs, alcohol,

meditation, prayer, or belief systems.

In our search for contentment, we may have come

across religions, philosophies, self-improvement programs, or

spiritual teachings that swept us off of our feet with beautiful

language and the promise that further down the road, after

many years of work, we might discover the contentment we are

seeking. We may have become diligently and earnestly involved

in these programs, seduced by promises of fabulous worldly

goods or other-worldly spiritual planes.

The treasure here is quite different. It is not a promise

of future fulfillment. It is not an elaborate system designed to

revise our personal stories. It is an invitation to put all that aside

long enough to look deeply into our present experience and to

realize that the wholeness and healing that we seek are already

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here. When we make this discovery, we find that love, peace,

compassion, and wisdom are naturally present. The key is to

recognize this treasure. We have just been overlooking it,

searching in all the wrong places.

Living Realization is nothing short of a love affair with

life. It is like falling in love with experiencing itself, and seeing

that our present experience is perfect just as it is, no matter

where we are or what is happening. This does not mean that we

escape pain or challenging situations, like illness or death.

Rather, we see that everything that happens—the good and the

bad—is equally drenched in freedom. To see perfection in

every experience, and in everyone and everything, is to realize

that our fundamental nature is experience itself. When we come

to realize that present experiencing is what we are, we live in a

deep and natural acceptance of each moment as it is. This is

freedom in the midst of every single happening in our lives.

Living Realization is about more than just learning a

new language or employing a new method. Although it is a

language and method, it is actually a vehicle designed to reveal

present freedom. This is about a realization that is lived, not

just entertained intellectually. If language alone were enough,

one could walk to the local bookstore, pick up any well-written

book on human freedom, and magically experience that

freedom simply by reading or memorizing the words.

Teachings, religions, courses, methods, paths, and

practices are merely tools. They are invitations to look into our

own direct experience. If a teaching is not designed to redirect

us back to our own experience, it is a distraction. This is not

about focusing on a method or practice for years with the hope

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4

of a payoff down the road. It is not about memorizing fancy

spiritual words. Rather, the method here is always directing us

to look into our present experience. It is about discovering that

the treasure of liberation is already contained within what we

are.

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The Main Invitation

To the best of your ability, put aside everything you have ever

learned or read about freedom or happiness for long enough to

hear this message. Start anew!

Let’s get to the crux of the matter, which is a constant

reminder that only you hold the key to this indestructible

contentment that we call “Living Realization.” No one can give

it to you, not even the clearest path, method, or teaching in the

world.

Let every word you read disappear as soon as you’ve

read it. Let the words be like breezes that blow through your

mind only long enough to remind you to recognize awareness in

all situations.

The main invitation in Living Realization is this:

Recognize awareness

Let all appearances be as they are

See that appearances are inseparable.

There are many other pointers, tools, and inquiries in this book,

but these simple pointers are really all you need to recognize

freedom in the midst of your life.

We must start with something fundamental: basic,

everyday awareness. What is awareness? Right now, before you

entertain your story of who you are and before any other

thought arises, there is a basic awake, thought-free awareness

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here. Awareness is the basic capacity to be aware. It’s as simple

as that. If you try to understand that intellectually, you miss the

simplicity of it. Before you think about it, are you aware right

now? That is awareness.

Stop for one moment and bring your full attention to

this basic awareness. It is what allows the present moment to

effortlessly be as it is. Notice that when you are not thinking,

this basic awareness simply allows, for example, the wall to be as

it is. It naturally allows a table to be as it is. It naturally allows

the air in the room to be as it is. It takes no effort to let

everything be as it is. Discover this for yourself. Stop thinking

for long enough to get one glimpse of the fact that there is a

basic awareness already here. All you have to do is notice that it

is here. Then notice that when a thought arises, this basic

awareness allows even that thought to be as it is.

At first, this awareness may not seem like a big deal at

all. Perhaps thoughts rush right back in very quickly, one after

the other, and take over your attention. But that one glimpse of

life without thought is actually monumental. It is a doorway to

freedom.

The more we return to this basic awareness, over and

over, throughout the day, the more we see that it is always and

already present. We discover for ourselves exactly what the

words acceptance, freedom, love, peace, compassion, wisdom,

and selflessness are really referring to: our own immediate

experience in the here and now, free of the belief in separation.

The first chapter of this book is devoted to encouraging

you to recognize basic, everyday awareness in your own direct

experience. We recommend that you take your time with

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Chapter One. Read it through several times, if necessary. Do

not try to understand awareness intellectually. It cannot be

grasped by the mind. Just follow the pointers.

The remaining chapters direct you into the profound

realization of inseparability, which is the energetic felt sense that

nothing is separate in your present experience. We devote

several chapters to discussing “appearances.” Appearances

include thoughts, emotions, sensations, states, and experiences.

This discussion becomes the doorway into the experience of

inseparability. The direct experience of the inseparability of life

is the key to acceptance, freedom, love, peace, compassion,

wisdom, and selflessness. You begin to experience all

appearances as coming and going inseparably to awareness,

rather than to a personal story of self. In allowing all thoughts

to be as they are, and recognizing awareness as the basic space

to which thoughts come and go, you rely less and less on

thinking. You rely more and more on simple, basic, everyday

awareness. You come to see through the belief in separation

that is embedded in the thought stream. This releases you from

suffering, seeking, and conflict.

We want to be clear about what we mean by the word

“suffering.” Many people have the idea that suffering refers to

intense physical agony or extreme mental and emotional

depression. This is not how the word “suffering” is used in this

text. To suffer is to be in any way resistant to life as it is

appearing right now. Suffering could be as simple as not

wanting to feel a present emotion or sensation, or even a minor

irritation. Suffering is the non-acceptance of life as it is in this

moment.

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If you are having trouble “getting” all this, don’t worry.

This method is designed to help you relax naturally into this

realization. Some may recognize the release from suffering,

seeking, and conflict very quickly. For others, there may be a

more gradual unfolding. But everyone comes to see that this is

a present, lived experience. Welcome to your freedom!

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The Middle Way

The Living Realization message is designed to awaken us from

the belief in separation into the present experience of

inseparability—Oneness. This recognition allows us to naturally

move and act in the world in a new way, free from the sense of

separation from each other and from all things in life. However,

if we then begin to emphasize viewpoints or beliefs at the other

end of the spectrum, such as “nothing exists,” we have gone too

far. We have denied conventional existence completely. The

Middle Way is freedom from these dualistic mental positions of

“everything exists separately” and “nothing exists.” The Middle

Way is the way of balance. It keeps us from turning Oneness

into a belief system that denies the play of relativity. Relative

viewpoints are always in play when we are thinking, speaking,

creating, and responding to each other in relationship. Yet

those viewpoints do not bring about suffering, seeking, and

conflict in our lives when we no longer identify with them.

They wash through our present experience temporarily, leaving

no trace, and no self to take ownership of them.

Conventional existence just means relativity. In this

method, even as we see through the belief in separation, we

continue to feel completely free to refer to relative things for the

sake of convenience. Although you will no longer energetically

experience yourself as separate, you will continue to be

comfortable referring to yourself by your name, taking care of

the practical needs of your body, your health, and your family,

and expressing your unique talents, skills, and knowledge. This

may seem contradictory at first. But it becomes quite natural. It

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is only the belief in being a completely separate person that

troubles us. Thoughts about a self and the appearance of having

a body and even a story are no problem at all once there is no

longer a deeply rooted identification with those appearances.

We start to experience a kind of delicious irony in the

Middle Way. We start to see life more and more as a play,

where we know in the deepest sense that the characters and

things in the play are not truly separate, yet we enjoy the play

anyway. Nothing is separate does not mean, “Nothing exists.”

Life continues appearing with all of its relationships,

experiences, colors, shapes, tastes, smells, and labels, yet nothing

appears inherently separate and cut off from everything else.

How do you discover the Middle Way? It just shows

up, automatically and naturally, when you get involved in this

method. It’s like jumping into a boat that feels very natural and

comfortable from the start, even though you don’t know exactly

where it’s going. Taking up the invitations in this book is like

following a map of the river. In recognizing awareness as ever-

present and seeing through separation, you find that you are

living the Middle Way naturally. Living becomes effortless and

the map is not relied upon as much. Direct experience takes

over.

This is how the Living Realization method works in our

lives:

1. We start out with the belief that we are separately

existing selves in a world of other, separately existing

people and things. Most people have this belief

operating in one degree or another. The belief in

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separation is the root cause of suffering, seeking, and

conflict.

2. In this method, we start with a very basic invitation to

recognize awareness in all situations. Awareness is seen

to be always present in the midst of whatever is

happening. This allows us to relax from our tendency

to focus and rely on thinking so much. We find a

natural ease and well-being as we recognize awareness.

3. We experience emotions and sensations more and more

without labeling them and placing them into a personal

story. This relieves the constant desire to escape into

the future in order to feel better. Every emotion and

sensation is allowed to be as it is presently. This

provides a natural healing, a mental and emotional

balance in our lives.

4. We discover that every object is inseparable from the

thoughts, emotions, and sensations that “make it up.”

We see that all thoughts, emotions, and sensations

appear and disappear inseparably to awareness. We use

the Unfindable Inquiry to see that we cannot find a

separate thing anywhere. The belief in separation

dissolves, either all at once or gradually.

5. In seeing through the belief in separation, we continue

to refer to things relatively for the sake of convenience.

This is the Middle Way. Conventional existence is the

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appearance of different things, like self, other, cars,

cities, justice, apples, the Earth, and science. We see

that everything is empty of separate nature and yet

things still appear. In conventional existence,

everything is relationship, but separation is nowhere to

be found.

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Basic Points

Here are the basic points of the method mapped out in more

detail. The chapters that follow explain these points more fully.

Awareness is the basic capacity to be aware. It is that to

which all appearances come and go.

Through resting as awareness, in brief moments,

repeatedly throughout the day, awareness is recognized

to be ever present, regardless of what appears and

disappears.

An appearance is anything that comes and goes

temporarily to awareness, including all thoughts,

emotions, sensations, states, and experiences.

Letting all appearances be as they are means letting each

thought, emotion, sensation, state, and experience come

and go freely, without trying to analyze, neutralize,

overcome, get rid of, or do anything else with it.

To say that appearances are inseparable from awareness

is to recognize that they never appear outside

awareness. Thoughts, emotions, states, sensations, and

experiences always appear to awareness; they cannot

appear independently of (separate from) awareness.

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This becomes more obvious as we recognize awareness

as ever-present.

The Middle Way is another name for Living Realization.

It is the direct experience that things do not exist

separately—only conventionally. To say that a thing

exists conventionally means that it appears only in

relation to other things. It cannot exist on its own side,

apart from everything else. The appearance of a thing is

dependent upon thought, emotion, sensation,

awareness, and other appearances. The appearances are

seen to be like mirages—like reflections shimmering

upon the surface of water. They appear in their brilliant

uniqueness, but they have no independent nature. This

gives rise to the seeing that all things, being empty of

separate nature, are interdependent in conventional

existence.

15

CHAPTER ONE:

Recognizing Awareness

We start by relaxing into a direct, experiential introduction to

awareness. We recognize awareness as often as possible,

throughout the day, every day, until that recognition is

unshakable and uninterrupted. We recognize awareness

whenever we remember to do so. No matter what we are

doing—relaxing, walking, sitting, working, engaging in physical

exercise, or lying in bed at night—we take a moment to

recognize awareness.

In recognizing awareness in every experience, it dawns

on us that awareness is always and already present, regardless of

what is happening in our lives. This provides a peace and

stability that passes all understanding. In seeing that awareness

is ever-present, we realize that awareness is our real identity.

This naturally and effortlessly releases the tendency to identify

with the various appearances (including thoughts, emotions,

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sensations, states, and experiences) that come and go to

awareness.

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How to Recognize Awareness

1. Start with thought-free awareness

Stop and notice the next thought in your story. As that thought disappears,

rest as the thought-free space that is left. That is thought-free awareness.

As humans, we are accustomed to relying heavily on thoughts,

both for a sense of self and for information about others and

the world. This habitual tendency to rely on thought creates a

belief in separation. The more we rely on thought, the more it

really feels like each thought is pointing to a separate thing.

Suffering, seeking, and conflict arise from the belief in

separation. Personal suffering arises because we identify with

the thought stream in our minds. If that thought stream is

negative, we experience emotional and mental suffering. Even if

it seems to be positive, there can also be suffering as we try to

defend or protect that image when it feels threatened in some

way.

This belief system is also the root cause of seeking.

When we believe we are separate, we think of ourselves as

individual stories existing in time. At every point within the

story, we find ourselves in the middle of an unfinished movie

called “My Life.” The past feels incomplete, and it seems that

only the future can provide completion. This results in constant

seeking towards the future. We repeatedly chase future

happiness, but never seem to find contentment on any

permanent basis. In this sense of separation, we often see

ourselves as deficient in some way; “I’m not good enough,”

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18

“I’m not there yet,” “I’m unlovable,” “I’m inadequate,” or “I’m

unsafe.” This sense of deficiency causes us to seek and try to

control or change other people and situations, in some attempt

to fix the deficiency. As long as we identify with this core

deficiency story, we cannot find stable contentment, peace, love,

and completion.

This belief system is also the reason why we experience

conflict. Separation makes us feel cut off from other people and

from life itself; there is a sense of spatial separation. When we

feel like separate objects, we believe that other objects (including

people) have the power to threaten or diminish who we are.

This causes us to want to be right and to make others wrong.

For every right, there is a wrong; we claim the right for

ourselves and thus make our opponent (whomever we’re in

conflict with) wrong. In being right, we build ourselves up.

This protects the fragile self center—the ego—from feeling

diminished or threatened. Unfortunately, this is precisely why

we find ourselves in conflict.

For many of us, thoughts happen very quickly, one

after another, and carry such force or momentum that the

thought stream feels uncontrollable. There is a sense that we

can’t shut it off. Throughout the day, all sorts of judgments,

opinions, beliefs, mental positions, criticisms, and other

concepts come up. Our sense of self is invested in the thought

stream, and we consult it to know who and what we are.

Everything about our identities, including our names, history,

memories, beliefs, and worldviews, reside in the thought stream.

A great majority of our thoughts are self-centered. The self

center is the main object in our experience. In this method, we

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use the term self center to refer to the sense of being a separate

person in time and space. We’ll talk more about this in Chapter

Three: Thoughts.

Although we may experience a quieting of the mind

through this method, this is not about experiencing life in a

completely thought-free way. We don’t attempt to shut the

thought stream off permanently, nor could we. Thoughts are a

part of life. Once we no longer identify with them, and cease to

believe they are pointing to separate things, we are free to use

the functional, conventional aspect of thought. For example, we

talk to our friends, buy food at the grocery store, drive our cars,

pay our taxes, and teach our children—all impossible without

the capacity to think.

The point is to see through the belief in separation, not

get rid of thought. As that belief falls away, thought is seen to

be a valuable tool for living. It’s an inseparable appearance

within awareness, which means it is none other than awareness.

We’ll talk more about inseparability later.

Although getting rid of thought is not the ultimate

point, we encourage you to begin with thought-free awareness

so that your belief in separation is interrupted. This provides a

relaxation and release from the self center, the story of past,

present, and future that is constantly and uncontrollably playing

itself out in our heads.

Through recognizing thought-free awareness, we come

to see that we do not need to rely on thinking so much. We can

simply be, as awareness. This is the simplest and most effortless

way of living. We come to experience awareness as natural,

effortless, and ever-present. As we experience thought-free

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20

awareness, our stories are seen to be less important in our lives.

Therefore, self-centeredness naturally falls away. We come to

see awareness as our real identity. This recognition provides the

peace, freedom, wisdom, joy, and well-being we’ve been seeking

in our lives.

What is meant by the term ‘recognizing thought-free

awareness?’ Awareness is not just a word. The word

“awareness” points to the awareness that sees that thought and

every other thought. All thoughts (and other appearances)

come and go to a basic, thought-free awareness. Recognizing

this from the start goes a long way in avoiding confusion. It is

worth repeating our earlier explanation of thought-free

awareness:

Stop and notice the next thought in your story. As that thought disappears,

rest as the thought-free space that is left. That is thought-free awareness.

To “rest as the thought-free space” means to add no

more thoughts for a few seconds. This is referring to present

experience, as it is, without emphasizing viewpoints. If you

have some difficulty with this pointer, start with this simple

method: bring your attention to the felt sense of presence in

your chest or inner body. Notice that there is no thought there.

There is only a felt sense of presence. As you rest attention

there more and more often, the space seems to expand or at

least feel more accessible in your experience. It starts to

encompass more and more of your experience. You start to

notice that the space in your chest is also present in your legs,

your arms, and in your head. The voice in your head, playing

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one thought after the other, is seen to be happening within this

space. You notice that this space is what hears that voice. So

this space starts to feel more and more like the real you, as the

thoughts start to seem less and less like you. You even start to

notice that the spaciousness you are experiencing within your

body and mind is the same spaciousness outside your body and

mind.

The invitation here is to rest in thought-free awareness as often as

possible throughout the day, every day. Just take very brief moments at

first—three to five seconds at a time. But take those moments repeatedly.

Don’t wait to take a moment every hour or even every ten minutes. Rest as

often as you remember to do so, over and over. The moments naturally

become longer the more often you rest. You are resting into the present

moment as it is, without placing stories and labels on what is happening.

You begin to see that this thought-free space is present

wherever you go, no matter where you are. You notice it at

home, at work, in the company of others, and when you are

alone. You experience its natural peacefulness. It feels like

home. Make relaxing into this present, restful space the most

important thing in your life. Return there often until the return

becomes automatic. It will become automatic because the peace

within that space has a powerful pull to it.

If you forget what is meant by thought-free awareness,

simply return to this chapter and read the paragraphs above.

Mark this page, if necessary.

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2. What is awareness?

Awareness is the boundary-less, thought-free present space to

which everything comes and goes. As you rest often, it becomes

more obvious that appearances come and go to awareness. The

experience of boundaries arises by way of thoughts and mental

images, which are appearances. When a thought or mental

image appears, it seems to refer to a separate object that has a

boundary around it. Awareness is what sees or experiences that

thought or mental image. When the thought or mental image

disappears, the experience of that object existing as its own

separate thing disappears also.

Awareness is that which watches or hears the voice in

your head. While it may be helpful to use metaphors and

descriptions to get an experiential introduction to awareness, we

need to be clear—right from the start—that awareness cannot

be described or captured in words or mental pictures. The voice

in your head can only give you words and mental pictures.

Whatever words or pictures we come up with are merely

appearances to awareness. They come and go in a more basic

awareness. Try not to get too involved in intellectualizing about

what we mean by the word “awareness.” The most direct

approach is simply to rest, without thought, on a regular basis.

From that rest, it becomes easier to directly experience all words

and mental pictures as appearances that come and go to this

more basic awareness.

No one understands awareness. It is not a thing.

Remember: humans tend to rely heavily on thought. So the

tendency may be to try and understand the words of this chapter

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intellectually. We invite you to see that thought comes and goes

to awareness. Even great ideas and profound descriptions of

awareness are concepts that come and go to awareness. No

matter how deep or ridiculous our concepts are about ourselves,

friends, family, society, science, God, enlightenment, self-

realization, business, religion, philosophy, culture, politics, or

anything else, they all arise and fall temporarily to awareness.

When our eyes are open, we see colors, shapes, and

things; that’s visual seeing. If we close our eyes, all the colors,

shapes, and things disappear. Awareness is that which is present

and awake both to the things that appear when our eyes are

open and to the absence of those things when our eyes are

closed. Awareness remains ever present, while these internal

and external appearances arise and fall within its view. This is

why the recognition of awareness provides stability in our lives

on every level. We no longer feel that our sense of self is

wrapped up in the various temporary appearances that come

and go.

It may also be helpful to refer to the word “being”

instead of awareness. It is difficult to refute the simple fact of

ever-present being. Regardless of the word we choose to call it,

find out what aspect of your existence never comes and goes.

Thoughts, emotions, sensations, states, experiences, objects,

colors, sounds, and all other phenomena come and go. The

simple fact of being remains present and here, no matter what

comes and goes. That is awareness.

Awareness is an ever-present seeing. It happens only in

the space of this moment. Awareness cannot be recognized by

referring to past experiences or by projecting forward into a

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future moment when you hope you will be able to recognize

awareness more clearly. Thoughts of the past and future come

and go to awareness. If you find yourself emphasizing thoughts

of the past and future, simply let them come to rest. Recognize

the thought-free awareness that is automatically and effortlessly

present as those thoughts come to rest.

Take a moment right now and recognize awareness.

Keep it simple and let all ideas drop away for one moment. Let

all the ideas you have ever learned about yourself, others, the

world, and awareness come to rest right now.

Just recognize what is timelessly awake and looking.

Forget everything that you’ve read in this text thus far. Drop it

all and look into the present fact of your own being. This

thought-free awareness has been there all your life. It is the only

thing about you that has never come and gone. Many concepts

have come and gone. Many emotions, sensations, states, and

experiences have come and gone. Throughout it all, this

awareness has always been here.

As you rest in the here and now, if a thought arises,

observe it directly and watch it disappear from view. Just let it

fall away and rest again as thought-free awareness. There is no

need to think about or analyze any of the words on this page.

Awareness is more akin to the white page on which this text

appears than any pointer that appears on it. Now drop that

pointer too! In fact, as you read the rest of this book,

periodically just take moments in which you forget what the text

is saying. Just relax and rest in thought-free awareness, allowing

all appearances to come and go freely, without emphasizing

them. Then return to the words, or not. The value of this book

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is not in memorizing its words, but rather in seeing that they

point to what you are in the most basic sense. It is important to

recognize awareness in your own direct experience.

Awareness is so immediately here and present in all

situations that it repeatedly gets overlooked as we focus on our

personal story and other words and mental pictures appearing to

awareness. What is here that never moves or changes, that

never comes and goes? You may have a tendency to overlook

this basic awareness, getting drawn into the appearances that

come and go, such as objects, thoughts, emotions, sensations,

states, and experiences. If you find this happening, be easy on

yourself. Just stop, whenever you notice that happening, and

recognize the basic, thought-free awareness that is inseparable

from the present moment. Do this as often as possible, until it

is seen that awareness is ever-present.

Awareness is always available, no matter what is

happening in our lives. We do not make recognizing awareness

into a practice that we only do at certain times of the day.

Treating the recognition of awareness in this way tends to

compartmentalize life. This is not a “spiritual” practice done at

certain times while you live in the “real world” for the rest of

the day. Awareness is present during work, during time with the

family, and every other place and time in our lives. We do not

recognize awareness only when we are in peaceful places or free

from the daily stress of our busy lives. We “check in” with

awareness in all situations. We recognize awareness when things

are going well and when life is going badly. We just take a

moment, no matter where we are or what we are doing. We

Recognizing Awareness

26

drop all of our labels about the situation that is presently

happening and we discover for ourselves that awareness is here.

Take a moment now and try this. Drop even the words

“awareness,” “presence,” “being” and any other pointer you

have read in this text or in another teaching. Let the present

sentence being spoken by the voice in your head come to rest.

Don’t look back at what you’ve just read. Let all thoughts come

to rest. Simply rest here for a moment. Just be, without any

thoughts. Take a moment.

3. Is recognizing thought-free awareness a practice?

This depends on the person, and may be different for everyone.

Some people need only one taste of recognizing thought-free

awareness, as that first taste reveals to them that awareness is

their real identity. They do not need to continue visiting or

returning to the recognition of awareness. From that point

forward, awareness is seen to be ever-present and all

appearances are seen to come and go effortlessly and

inseparably to awareness.

Others may need to repeatedly take brief moments of

recognizing thought-free awareness, returning to it again and

again until it has stabilized and is experienced as ever-present. If

you need to take these brief moments, notice that the experience

may last for only a few seconds the first few times. You have

tasted awareness. That’s all we are asking you to do in the

beginning. We invite you to experience thought-free awareness

as often as possible throughout the day, every day, no matter

where you are or what you are doing.

Living Realization

27

The momentum of thinking can be so strong at first

that all you can do is take brief moments. But as you take more

and more of these moments, continuing to rest in thought-free

awareness very often throughout the day, the moments naturally

get longer and longer. It becomes naturally easier to rest more

often. At some point, it stops feeling like a practice that you are

doing. Awareness is seen to be ever-present—not something

you visit, not something you practice, but what you are in the

deepest sense.

This simple practice of repeatedly taking brief moments

to recognize awareness provides rest from constant thinking,

and puts you in the perfect position to begin seeing that you do

not have to identify with all the thoughts, emotions, sensations,

states, and experiences that come and go temporarily to

awareness. It also places you in the perfect position to begin to

really look into your experience and see whether separation is

real or not. We will talk more about seeing through separation

in the coming chapters.

Perhaps the best way of pointing to awareness is to say

that it is our capacity to be aware. By speaking of it as a

capacity, there may be less of a tendency to think of it as

something that lies beneath, behind, or beyond all appearances.

All descriptions of awareness, including that it lies “beneath,”

“behind,” or “beyond,” come and go to our basic capacity to be

aware. This capacity is not anything that is observed or that

appears. It is that to which descriptions and appearances come

and go. Stop right now and notice this! Rest, for a few seconds,

without thought. Be alert to colors, light, sounds, sensations,

and emotions without labeling them. Just notice. When

Recognizing Awareness

28

thought arises, notice that it is arising. That is the recognition of

awareness.

Living Realization

29

Tools for Recognizing Awareness

1. Center of the room

Sit in the middle of a room in a chair that you can rotate. Start

by looking at only one wall. Notice all the objects that appear as

you look at that wall. External objects, such as colors, textures,

lines, lamps, doors, pictures, and so on will seem to be there, but

notice that you cannot register separate objects until thought

arises. No object is announcing itself as a separate thing.

Thought does all the announcing.

In order for a lamp to appear as its own separate thing,

the word “lamp” or some other mental description or image

must arise to that which is cognizing i.e., to awareness. Things

are thoughts, first and foremost. Notice that thought is a so-

called internal object. Thoughts seem to happen internally,

within the mind. Without thoughts appearing internally, you

cannot experience separate objects externally; there is nothing

“out there” in the room that has its own separate nature.

Stated another way, when the thought “lamp” arises or

a mental image of the lamp arises in your mind, your attention

focuses down on one area, as if that area—a lamp—is its own

separate thing. As that thought or mental image disappears,

relax into thought-free awareness for a few seconds. Relax in an

open, unfocused way, taking in the entire experience of the

present moment but without labeling anything. In this view,

there is only a seamless tapestry of experience, without

individual forms. Thought creates the notion of things existing

independently out there. See that all appearances, whether

Recognizing Awareness

30

internal or external, are appearing to awareness. Throughout

the day, the appearances are constantly changing and coming

and going. Yet awareness does not move or change. It does

not come and go. It is always present and awake to the coming

and going of everything.

Test this out by rotating your chair to the next wall,

then to the next wall, and then the next. As you face each wall,

completely new appearances come up. New thoughts or mental

images appear, which name new objects out there, such as

“chair,” “picture,” and “door.” As you move from wall to wall,

the only aspect of experience that remains unchanged is the

cognizing space to which all of these appearances come and go.

That space is awareness, and it is the only constant in your life.

Now try the same experiment outside. This basic, cognizing

awareness is also present when you are outside. Even though

the appearances are different—perhaps a road, some trees, some

new thoughts, sensations, or emotions—awareness is still there,

unchanged. It is always present, no matter where you are or

what you are doing.

When you are clear that all things, both internal and

external, are appearing to the same awareness, see that

“internal” and “external” are also just thoughts, appearing and

disappearing within awareness.

Living Realization

31

2. Two objects

Locate two separate objects, at least three feet apart, in the room

where you’re sitting. You can use anything—a lamp, desk,

plant, computer, or whatever else is around. Let’s call them

object A and object B. Notice that the eyes can only focus on

one object at a time. You can go back and forth between A and

B, but you cannot direct your attention to both objects at once.

You can only oscillate back and forth between the two objects.

First A, then B, then back to A, and then back to B.

Now stop focusing on one object at a time. Instead,

pull back (so to speak) and recognize yourself as the relaxed,

thought-free, unfocused awareness that is aware of the whole

room at once. Just sit and be, without emphasizing any

concepts about the room, yourself, any object in the room, or

anything else. Just be the thought-free space in which the

moment is happening. Notice that the present moment is

inseparable from the awareness that is experiencing the present

moment. Notice that when you are resting as awareness in this

way, the room feels like one seamless tapestry of colors, light,

shades, and shapes. Without thought, there are no separate

objects like “chair” or “floor.”

Now allow a thought to arise about some object in the

room, perhaps a chair. Let’s say the chair is brown, with a

round shape. As the thought “chair” arises, the eyes focus on

the chair. Or the reverse happens. As the eyes focus in that

direction, thought arises. The chair, as an apparent separate

object, arises when the thought “chair” arises. This is revealing

Recognizing Awareness

32

that the mind makes objects through thinking. We do not

experience separate objects until the mind gets involved.

If you are like most people, your thoughts are racing,

one right after the other. This leads you to believe the world is

made of separate things that are just lying around, whether you

are thinking about them or not. Many people have this sense

that thought is just mirroring or representing what is already

“out there” in the world. But without thought, there are no

separate objects out there. See that all the objects you believe

you see are, first and foremost, concepts. Even basic things like

colors, light, shades, and shapes in the room are concepts or

mental impressions. For example, to know something is blue,

the memory of blue must present itself as a thought. “Blue” is a

concept. Everything you see arises by way of concepts. Stated

another way, individual things (along with their descriptive

features) appear only when thoughts are present.

3. Looking from the space

Look in the mirror. Notice that there is a form staring back. In

the reflection, you can clearly see a physical form with eyes, a

nose, a mouth, ears, and hair. Then walk away from the mirror.

Notice that now there is only space looking outward from

behind your face. In that area where the reflection showed a

physical form, there is now only space looking outward at the

world. From this view, looking outward from behind the face,

there is no form. There is no face. There are no eyes, nose,

mouth, ears, or hair. There is only spacious awareness looking

at the world.

Living Realization

33

What you usually take to be a solid, separate form (the

face in the mirror) is really spacious awareness. Notice that the

entire world appears in that spacious awareness from which we

are looking. See that there is no division between that space and

the world that is appearing in it. If a division or boundary line

appears, it is because a thought is appearing. The most

prevalent thoughts are “me” and “my body.” Notice that when

it seems as if you are “in there” (in the body) witnessing a

separate world “out there,” some subtle thought or mental

image is appearing. It may be just the thought “I” or your

name. It may be an image of your body appearing in the mind,

very subtly. Just find it. Look directly at that thought or mental

image as it appears in your mind. In noticing it directly, it falls

away. As it falls away, rest as thought-free awareness. Now

there is no boundary or dividing line between you (awareness)

and the world that is appearing within awareness. There is no

inside separate from the outside.

4. Emotions and sensations

As an emotion or sensation appears, no matter whether it is

positive or negative, notice the space around it. Relax any

mental label that arises to describe it (i.e., fear, tightness, etc).

When an emotion or sensation arises, simply observe that it is

raw energy. And then relax even that label.

Notice the viewpoints that desire to label, analyze, or

get rid of the raw energy. Emphasizing these viewpoints leaves

us in a state of constantly wanting to feel better. That is seeking.

In noticing these viewpoints, but not emphasizing them, they

Recognizing Awareness

34

naturally disappear. You can then rest as awareness more easily,

letting the emotion be as it is, without labeling it or telling a

story about it. Although thoughts may have an agenda to do

something with the emotion or sensation, that which is

cognizing the emotion or sensation (i.e., awareness) has no such

agenda.

If, while allowing an emotion or sensation to be as it is,

you begin to subtly experience awareness as a field or space with

boundaries, remember this principle: whenever you experience

or even subtly sense that awareness has a boundary or border of

any kind, notice that the boundary or border is a subtle mental

image or outline. Let that image or outline appear and disappear

to the awareness that cognizes it.

Emotions and sensations can seem to have boundaries

around them. Those boundaries are also subtle mental pictures.

Observe those pictures directly and you can see this. All mental

pictures are temporary. By not observing these appearances

directly, it can appear that these emotions and sensations are

stuck in a body—stuck inside these pictures. Observing the

mental pictures directly allows them to morph or dissolve on

their own. The energy can then move more naturally, without

the sense of being stuck somewhere. To let emotions and

sensations arise and fall without thoughts and pictures being

projected on them has a profound healing effect. We begin to

identify less and less with emotions and sensations.

Living Realization

35

5. Recognizing silence

No matter where we go, what we do, or what sounds are arising,

silence is always here, underneath the noise of life. There is a

quietness here that is overlooked as the mind searches for the

next thought, the next state, or the next experience. This silence

cannot be known by thinking about it. It can only be

experienced through resting in thought-free awareness. This

silence is a doorway to recognizing awareness.

There is silence “inside” the body and “outside” the

body. It is undivided silence. Simply notice silence throughout

the day whenever possible. This is the same as resting in

thought-free awareness. Recognize yourself as that silence first.

Then see that awareness is that which is aware even of the

silence itself. Notice that every sound seems to arise out of the

silence and fall back into it. See that even the word “silence” is

a concept. Drop that concept and just be, without thought, as

often as possible.

6. Locating awareness

In each of the experiments so far, it may seem like we’re

pointing to an awareness that is located in the body or in the

mind, as if it is emanating out of your eyes. There is a tendency

when reading these words to believe that awareness has a

location. This belief accompanies the assumption that

awareness is my awareness and that other people have their own

“awarenesses.” Let’s look at this more closely.

Recognizing Awareness

36

Awareness is not a thing. It is not an object. Only

objects appear to have location. Awareness is more like space.

It is not possible to locate space in one place rather than

another. The word “space” here is just a pointer. Let it point

you to the realization that your basic essence is undivided,

boundary-less awareness.

This undivided space has no location. Location appears

when thought appears. In order to even contemplate the notion

that awareness resides within the body and mind, there must be

a subtle mental image or outline of a body and mind that

appears. It’s often very subtle, more like an assumption, but it’s

there. Just notice it when it appears. Notice that whatever sees

that thought is non-locatable awareness. In noticing the thought

that attempts to locate space somewhere specific, that thought

or image comes to rest. You realize that what is noticing the

thought or image is not a thought or image. That which is

noticing is awareness. In simply resting for one moment,

completely free of thought, it is seen that space cannot be

located and is not located anywhere. This should help clear up

the notion that awareness is located only in the body and mind.

Absolutely everything you can think of, including body,

mind, mom, city, Earth, cup, chair, justice, evil, good, and bad as

well as everything mentioned in this chapter, including the

words “space” and “awareness,” is coming and going to that

which sees those things. That which sees everything is

awareness.

Living Realization

37

A Final Note about Chapter One

We encourage you to spend some time with the simple practice

of recognizing thought-free awareness, before moving on to the

next chapters. This can be a powerful, life-transforming way of

investigating the nature of your present experience. It’s a way of

seeing that there is awareness prior to thought, even though you

have always believed yourself to be the thought-based story in

your mind. That story has told you that you are a separate self

in a world of separate things. Through recognizing awareness,

that story is seen to be something that arises and falls within

awareness.

Recognizing thought-free awareness releases the belief

in separation. It helps us to no longer identify with certain

thought structures that repeatedly play in the mind, causing

suffering, seeking, and conflict. When we see that things are not

really objective, separate things at all, and that they arise only by

way of thoughts, a natural relaxation happens. Life begins to

flow more freely. We come to see that all we really have to do is

to allow all viewpoints to come and go, without emphasizing

them for a sense of self or for truth. The tension, stress, and

resistance in our lives naturally release in this realization.

Everything is allowed to be just as it is. We experience ongoing

joy, acceptance, and forgiveness. We find a basic wisdom and

peace at the core of our experience. We find exactly what we’ve

been looking for all our lives—freedom from the sense of

limitation, from the sense of being separate individuals cut off

from others, experience, and life itself.

Recognizing Awareness

38

Before moving to the next chapters, it is helpful to have

an experiential introduction to awareness. What does

“experiential” mean? It means that you should have more than

an intellectual understanding that awareness is ever-present.

You should be experiencing many moments throughout the day

where awareness is directly recognized as the basic, cognizing,

thought-free, open space of the present moment. This direct

experience is helpful as a preparation for the discussion of

appearances and objects in the next chapters.

If you have difficulty in recognizing thought-free

awareness even after taking up the practice in this chapter, be

easy on yourself! Some people experience this difficulty. Simply

move on to the next chapters, which investigate the appearances

that come and go. As you begin noticing these temporary

appearances, and letting them all be as they are without

manipulating them, it becomes easier to recognize the awareness

to which the appearances are coming and going.

Living Realization

39

Chapter One: Summary

Awareness is the basic capacity to be aware. It is that to which

all appearances such as thoughts, emotions, sensations, states,

and experiences temporarily come and go.

To recognize awareness means to experience awareness as

always present. It is always here, no matter what is happening

or what we are doing. Everything that happens in life is a

temporary appearance, coming and going to ever-present

awareness. Even the notion of being a separate person is an

appearance to awareness.

Start with thought-free awareness. Stop and notice the next

thought. As that thought disappears, rest as the thought-free

space that is left. For a few seconds, don’t add another thought.

Enjoy the space of no-thought. That is thought-free awareness.

It is present experience, as it is, without viewpoints.

Stick with this simple practice at first: take brief moments of

resting as thought-free awareness repeatedly throughout the day,

every day. How brief? At first, just three to five seconds at a

time. Keep it that simple! How often? Do it as often as you

can. Make resting as awareness your top priority. Do it

repeatedly. As you do it more and more, the moments naturally

become longer. It becomes natural and automatic to rest as

awareness in all situations.

40

ABOUT:

Scott Kiloby

Scott Kiloby is an international

speaker and the author of Reflections of

the One Life: Daily Pointers to

Enlightenment, Love’s Quiet Revolution:

The End of the Spiritual Search, Doorway

to Total Liberation: Conversations with

What Is, and the companion book to

this one, Living Relationship: Finding

Harmony With Others. He is also the creator of an addiction

recovery method called Natural Rest. His book on this method

is called The Natural Rest Method: A Revolutionary, Simple Way to

Overcome Addiction.

Scott travels all over the world giving talks in which

those attending experience nondual presence. In these

meetings, every position and belief gets challenged. This leaves

those attending completely open to allow the present moment

to unfold in a new way, free of identification with thought. The

point of the meetings is to allow people to go home and

discover for themselves the freedom Scott’s message is pointing

to.

Scott is simplifying and demystifying the message of

enlightenment or non-duality. He reaches out to people who

are suffering or seeking or cannot seem to find fulfillment in this

Living Realization

41

life no matter where they go or what they do. He communicates

that freedom is available and that it is actually contained in their

very presence, yet it is overlooked.

Connect with Scott:

www.livingrealization.org

www.kiloby.com

www.doorwaytoliberation.com

https://twitter.com/#!/Scottkiloby

http://www.facebook.com/kiloby

42

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

This book was truly a labor of love. Thanks to everyone in my

life, too many to name, who acted as teachers reflecting back my

own story of deficiency so that I could see through it. Special

thanks to Curt King, Fiona Robertson, and Chad Sewich.

43

TESTIMONIALS

“It may be that from your perspective, you don’t see all of the

enormous value and benefit you bring to so many. I have

partaken of countless pages of writings, videos, audios, etc. but

what you have shared with the world is in a whole different

league. It’s an actual, applicable, practical, doable, experiential-

changing offering.”

“After a lifetime of moving from one spiritual belief system to

another [in Non-Duality teachings], I’ve discovered a genuine,

non-dogmatic invitation to wake up from the dream of seeking

and instead to live in the powerful presence of what is. Scott is

one of the most down-to-earth, accessible and honest teachers

I’ve met. Working with him continues to alter my experience of

life profoundly. I’m able to glimpse a quality of Being that has

nothing to do with circumstances.”

“Living Realization is truly different: it is as much of a “how-to”

manual as is possible with this kind of material. Despite the

limitation of words, the paradox of duality, and the futility of

trying to explain “how” to realize no-self, the approach of LR

succeeds more than any other book I’ve encountered (including

Scott’s other books). Finally, a clear writing which guides the

reader to let go of and see through the reader…step-by-step.”

Testimonials

44

“Our group finished the [Living Realization] book today. That

last chapter is a very clear summation—quite powerful

actually…thank you for your willingness to be the vehicle for

this clarity on awareness and inseparability. You are one of the

few that is able to see this and explain it. The Middle Way is so

freeing.”

“When I read your book—Living Realization, I could not skip

over any part of that book. I mean, I would’ve liked too. It is so

packed full of wonderful stuff. I’ve read fifteen books in the last

fifteen weeks and there was nothing in there that I didn’t think

was useful. It was one of the most enlightening books I’ve ever

read…really. I think it’s a masterpiece!”

“I have been meditating and reading books on non-duality and

Eastern philosophy for many years. The writing of Scott Kiloby

is the most direct, articulate and carefully worded expression of

liberation from suffering that I have encountered.”

45

ADDITIONAL TITLES:

Available from the Kiloby Group

Living Relationship: Finding Harmony With Others

Scott Kiloby

Love’s Quiet Revolution: The End of the Spiritual Search

Scott Kiloby

Reflections of the One Life: Daily Pointers to Enlightenment

Scott Kiloby

The Natural Rest Method: A Revolutionary, Simple Way to Overcome

Addiction

Scott Kiloby

Doorway to Total Liberation: Conversations With ‘What Is’

Scott Kiloby

AVAILABLE AT:

www.doorwaytoliberation.com

www.livingrealization.org

www.amazon.com