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No Mud, No Lotus! Thich Nhat

Hanh A Journey into Forgiveness Workshop by Rev. Michelle Wadleigh

Table of Contents Intended outcomes for this class: ...................................................................................................... 3

Greetings and Welcome, ............................................................................................................... 3

Foundational Beliefs for a Transformed Life: .................................................................................. 5

Straight from Holmes ........................................................................................................................ 6

SOM Textbook, Page 222, Para. 2 ................................................................................................ 6

This Thing Called You, Chapter 8, Para.1-3 ................................................................................ 6

Why the blame game doesn’t work! .............................................................................................. 8

SCRIPTS ........................................................................................................................................ 12

The purpose of this script is support you in your REACTIVE state. .................................. 12

The Broken Promise Forgiveness Practice: ............................................................................ 13

The mechanism of Forgiveness: Prayer!..................................................................................... 15

Be willing to feel first! .................................................................................................................... 16

Reasons to choose to Forgive: .................................................................................................... 16

Choosing not to forgive: ............................................................................................................. 17

WE MUST BUILD OUR ‘WHY’ ................................................................................................ 17

Spiritual Mind Treatments for this process: .............................................................................. 19

Cultivating the Courage to take on Forgiveness ......................................................................... 19

A treatment to be your forgiveness process. . . ....................................................................... 20

From another angle. . ............................................................................................................... 21

Learning the forgiveness formula! .............................................................................................. 24

Learning from our Spiritual Family: .......................................................................................... 25

➢ Ho’oponopono (ho-o-pono-pono) .................................................................................... 25

Reconciliation ............................................................................................................................ 26

Rituals and other influences: ....................................................................................................... 28

1. Use Mother Nature ............................................................................................................... 28

Never have to forgive again! ........................................................................................................ 31

Addendum Constructing a Forgiveness Treatment................................................................... 44

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Essential elements of a forgiveness-focused treatment: ........................................................ 44

Some Suggested language. . . (Always find your own language.) .................................... 45

Collusion or Collaboration ................................................................................................... 46

For the health of the practitioner: ........................................................................................... 47

PERSONAL SHARING: ...................................................................................................... 48

I wish for you. . . ............................................................................................................................. 49

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Intended outcomes for this class:

Provide the opportunity for the individual students to heal from their buried wounds

Provide each student with the skills to work more deeply with their clients

Each student will be able to articulate the value of doing deep forgiveness work on both a personal and professional level

Greetings and Welcome,

This class was originally created for the metaphysical student at every

level, however, it has become very clear that we, as practitioners, are

called to find a comfort level with:

1. Our personal forgiveness process;

o We can’t guide anyone down the road unless we,

ourselves, are holding the light;

2. The logical and intelligent reasons and evidence that forgiveness

is key in the bigger picture of life transformation;

3. Guiding clients through their own forgiveness journey.

Radical Forgiveness by Colin Tipping is the book suggested as the reference for this

class. It is strongly recommended that you read it, although we will NOT be using

the specific material included in his book. The material and processes provided in

this course have been developed through working with thousands of individuals in

classes, privately, and in workshops.

Over my many years of working with individuals it became evident

that without a forgiveness process as part of one’s spiritual journey

development, that individual would be doomed to repeat the very

issue(s) for which they sought support. I discovered that living a life

without forgiveness keeps us in a very detrimental loop of pain and

suffering. To not practice forgiveness is to create a glue that permanently

connects you to the stories, the issues, and the pain of the past, and

often recreating the old drama in the present.

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We must learn to wipe clean the slate, which in this case,

means clean out our subconscious, where all our pain

memories reside.

And THEN, in addition to forgiving another, we must forgive

ourselves - over and over again. Too often, we suffer for years after

something happened because we don’t free ourselves of the event

through forgiveness. We will learn to do this for ourselves and for our

clients with great care and compassion. Forgiveness breaks the patterns.

We are here to learn HOW to clear out our subconscious and how to do it

with our clients.

Happiness comes from being free, free from emotional pain and

uncontrolled reactions. As you learn to navigate the choppy waters of

your emotions and gain the ability to choose the direction of your life,

you get to live by design and not by default.

I am so profoundly grateful for discovering Religious Science and the Science of Mind (SOM) because it has been the key to my healing, my expanding happiness, and my freedom to express in a loving and compassionate manner. SOM and prayer treatment gave me my life back. Ernest Holmes and the Science of Mind gave me the tool for freedom – without Spiritual Mind Treatment I would still be trying to move through some of the most painful experiences of my life. The quote highlighted below is from the Science of Mind textbook, and every time I read it I am reminded that I am on the right track. Thank you, Ernest Holmes!

In this course, you are being asked to take a big leap of faith and

action. This is an opportunity to move more in the direction of taking

responsibility for your life rather than blame, however. For some, maybe

you, there is a level of pain and suffering that came at a very young age

and at the hands of trusted family members. If this is your reality, your

responsibility falls more in the realm of what you want to do with it

now, since you cannot undo the act or the past. We can, however,

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together with the application of some practices, release and undo the

pain and the current effects.

Foundational Beliefs for a Transformed Life:

Below is a list of presuppositions that will empower your growth. Take time to contemplate and question what they mean to you.

1. No one is against you, even if they think they are!

2. You are safe. Life/God/Spirit is for you,

working on your behalf – always!

3. If you feel it, it is yours to heal.

(Feeling it = reacting to it)

4. Never take anything personally, but if you do begin to take something

personally, take time to grow from it.

5. Always be impeccable with your word and know that you co-create your

world from that word – both spoken and unspoken

6. Protect your I Am closely.

(Remember, your I Am is the perfect prayer.)

7. There is a place within you that has never been hurt, harmed, or

injured in any way. Return to and identify with this place often.

8. You are not at the mercy of what was, not now, not ever!

9. Your shadow is not dark or wrong or evil. It is simply a repository of your

past. Your pure power exists on the other side of this shadow.

10. Your body is a barometer, learn to read this barometer.

11. Take 100% responsibility, not blame, for your world.

Responsibility = Power!

12. Practice the highest integrity possible throughout your life.

Simply, do what you say.

13. Seek ye first to understand, then be understood.

14. You are never alone.

15. There is only ONE and It loves you completely.

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Together we can move from VICTIM to

VICTOR.

Straight from Holmes SOM Textbook, Page 222, Para. 2

Disease will be healed, provided you get at its cause and remove it – and by

getting at its cause, we mean getting at the mental cause – and provided the

one for who you are working is willing to surrender that cause. You cannot heal

anyone of his trouble, if it is the result of some mental attitude which he will

not surrender. In this case, find out what the mental attitude is and remove it,

by showing the patient/client the right mental attitude. It is the practitioner’s

duty to uncover false ideas of life and replace them with the truth. If this can be

done before disease destroys the physical body, a healing will always follow.

This Thing Called You, Chapter 8, Para.1-3

Everything you have ever thought, said, done, seen, learned or experienced, has left an imprint upon your subconscious mind. This subconscious also contains memory images of your family life, your ancestral background and the sum total of what the whole world has thought or believed. These memories are not dead things. Quite the reverse, they are always active. But there is more to it than this. Just as you are being acted upon by your own memories, you are also being acted upon by the Mind of God which is within and around you. Between this Divine Presence, this upper part of your being, and your outward experience, there is a field of subconscious reactions which have been gathered up throughout the ages. But you are a creator and not a creature. Today you may be suffering from the effects of the race consciousness and your own beliefs, but today you can begin to change them.

The weak can never forgive.

Forgiveness is the attribute of

the strong.

Mahatma Gandhi

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The world as we witness it needs more

individuals who are able to positively

choose the direction of their lives and

therefore, live by design and not by default.

The world needs YOU to be all you can be,

to be the most beautiful, potent and free

person you can be. And the world really

needs each of us to positively infect others

with our desire (and decision) to be whole, complete, and free. Be contagious,

be a contagion of love. As it is said, God’s gift to you is life, your gift to God is

what you do with that life.

Are you thinking, “Why is this workshop entitled, “No Mud, No Lotus?”

Well, if you didn’t know before, the lotus flower, which in my opinion is one of

the most beautiful flowers there is, is rooted and grows out of the mud of the

pond. Without the mud and the muck, these flowers aren’t nourished. The

same is true for you and your beauty. All that has come before in your life, all

the pain, the stories, the memories, are the very foundation of you becoming

the You of (your) Choice.

All the work is worth the courage and effort required since in the end,

you will be left standing on steady, sturdy ground, deeply rooted in a place of

Truth and beauty.

Darkness cannot drive out

darkness; only light can do

that. Hate cannot drive out

hate; only love can do that.

Martin Luther King, Jr.

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Before beginning any forgiveness practice, we get in touch

with our WHY! A compelling “why” will help you to transcend any resistance

you may encounter along the way. Sometimes we just don’t want to let go,

sometimes we just don’t want to let someone off the hook because we are still

invested in being “right” or angry and we want others to suffer as much as we

have. Often, we have investment in our identity with our righteousness, or

anger, and it is the only way we know ourselves. By establishing your “WHY,”

you move more clearly and authentically through the process.

Some “whys” that might work for you:

I choose to recover my emotional freedom.

I choose to be healthy again.

I choose to be free to love and express myself.

I choose to stop being so defensive/angry.

Why the blame game doesn’t work!

Let’s begin with inquiry.

There is nothing as good as a well-placed and well-composed question to

open you up to yourself, to learn something new and to free yourself of

old ways of being.

AS PRACTITIONERS:

• It is important to truly understand how you got where you are.

• To know how to explain the use of the sub-conscious and how it

relates to the work we are doing.

• To be able to explain to your clients why forgiveness is an important

aspect of their individual and collective healing.

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One of the main lessons you will learn during this course is:

YOUR CURRENT STATE OF BEING IS THE RESULT OF YOUR

CONSCIOUSNESS & UNHEALED EMOTIONAL ENERGY.

– There are NO EXCEPTIONS to this.

The list below is to prompt and guide your inquiry.

➢ Were you abused as a child?

o By a family member?

o By a religious teacher of sorts?

o By a trusted friend of the family, teacher, coach?

➢ Were you reared by alcoholics?

➢ As a person of color, have you experienced the effects of racism?

➢ As an LGBT individual, did you suffer as you came out?

➢ Are you angry about the current, or old, political system?

➢ Have you been unfairly treated at work, possibly released from your job

in an untimely manner, or other experience?

➢ Did your spouse cheat on you?

➢ Do you experience a general sense that life is not working for you, which

Be honest with yourself:

Have you felt or do you currently feel like a victim?

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leaves you feeling victimized/mad at the world?

➢ Are you angry with yourself? Are you judging your recent or old

behavior?

➢ *QUALIFYING NUMBER = On a scale of 1 – 10, rate each experience.

1 being the least impactful and 10 being the most impactful.

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TAKING INVENTORY

There are many ways that we identify relevant individuals with

whom to practice forgiveness. Some are extremely obvious, while some

are not. However, these individuals continue to leave a lasting impact

upon us, – until the time comes that we can forgive and release each one.

Is there anyone in your life who made a promise to you and broke

it? Did this broken promise lead to a greater disappointment? Did it have

a long-term affect that you didn’t anticipate? Do you now find people to

be untrustworthy? Do you question promises made?

You see, even these very subtle things can lead to a life of

disappointment that leads us to taking emotional prisoners - so to speak.

Healing from the effects of such things always begins with you first taking

inventory, an in-depth and honest look at what is left hovering in your

subconscious, your pain-body, and your emotional energy.

Below, two different scripts are provided. One is to support you when

you find yourself in a reaction to an emotional stimulus.

The second script: The Broken Promises Script is to help create the

muscle of forgiveness as it is applied to smaller offenses.

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SCRIPTS

The purpose of this script is support you in your REACTIVE state.

Owning the experience – fearlessly!

This is a suggested script to be used as a first response to a stimulating

experience.

This is a script/idea that you can use once you feel something, but before you

know what to do. This works both for shadow work and forgiveness work.

I know this experience is mine.

I don’t have to like it, but I am willing to love myself through it.

So, I say to you (name whoever has sparked this feeling): thank you for

inciting this feeling in me and for helping me to embrace a new

opportunity to grow and find more freedom.

I see you and I recognize the opportunity to grow.

I feel into this moment and choose to be fearless in feeling it.

I bless you, (name person or feeling) for this invitation to grow.

I trust this path will lead me to my fully expressed self.

I bless myself for having the courage to grow.

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The Broken Promise Forgiveness Practice:

There are many different levels of influences that cause pain and

suffering. The following process is meant to be used with individuals

whom you believe broke a promise to you. This can help you with greater

offenses, but it is meant to be used for the simple ones.

Begin by naming the individual and then acknowledge these things:

(Place the name of the offender in the blank.)

1. _______ is not the person I wanted him/her to be. 2. _______ does not possess the characteristics that I wish he/she did. 3. _______ is not responsible for my continued upset. 4. I, alone, am responsible for my response. 5. I free _______ from my mind and I am made free.

And because the question is always posed: Yes, you may use your

own name, but it is also important that you are clear about identifying

and resolving your past and current relationships with others.

So, what is the purpose of working with these statements?

You are retrieving your power; first, by becoming present, and then

by clearly acknowledging “who” is responsible for your reality. You would

not be served if you were led to believe that anyone/everyone else is

ever responsible for your current emotional experience.

Let’s repeat from earlier on: You are either responsible

for what happened OR for how you hold what happened to

you within your heart and mind.

As we practice the Science of Mind, we are called to own our

experience, and our experience exists in our mind and our pain-body.

This is not a mysterious or mystical truth, it is our basic teaching.

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If we want to be free, we are called to first take responsibility for

what is, which is different from taking blame. Blame leads to shame and

suffering. Responsibility leads to FREEDOM!

When you are the problem; when you experience the blame; when

you feel the pain, self-forgiveness is your path to freedom.

Self-forgiveness is an extremely complex subject and it needs to be

handled with great compassion. We move

slowly from now on.

You are here to find your freedom!

All is forgivable if you are

willing to surrender to Spirit

any attachment of suffering and

allowing Spirit, as

you, to be the One who

heals all discord.

Rev. Michelle

***REGARDING YOUR CLIENTS: Forgiveness is most important to use when your client has a

pattern in their life that they cannot seem to kick, a prolonged illness, or an issue with not

being able to cultivate healthy relationships. Your client might not understand how practicing

forgiveness can help these issues in their healing process. You will need to learn how to describe

the process to them with great confidence; so, you will want to understand the impact of their

pain and its impact upon their emotional health. To insure they are willing to work with you in

this way, learn to make this practice logical. Practice explaining the process.

➢ If you find yourself or your client saying: I have already forgiven this person, it is

important that you guide them ever so gently to practice some radical honesty to realize

that the fruit of the tree is the determining factor. BE GENTLE. DON’T PUT THEM ON THE

DEFENSIVE!

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The mechanism of Forgiveness: Prayer!

Practicing Affirmative Prayer Treatment is the art and the science

of developing a relationship with the Divine and then through that

relationship, learning how to redirect your life in the direction of your

freedom, your dreams.

Prayer is about surrender; total and complete surrender. Prayer is

often the missing element in formulas developed to practice forgiveness.

The beauty of prayer is that it seeps into places within you that only Spirit

can go. Prayer is how you focus the healing power of Spirit into the depth

of your being.

To use prayer treatment effectively for this purpose, as a

practitioner, you must learn to direct your attention to the subconscious

for yourself first, of course, and then for your client. The goal is to find

your truest identity – GOD!

Using treatment is a two-part process for this purpose:

Clear out the subconscious and identify with your one true identity.

Let’s look at why both forgiveness and prayer are necessary as a formula

for freedom.

➢ Every time something painful happens to you there is an internal

emotional imprint. It is inscribed emotionally and energetically; it

leaves a definite impression upon your subconscious. This

emotional, energetic imprint also has an impact within your

physical body, also known as your energy body. (This is often the

genesis of dis-ease.) This imprint is what informs your behavior,

your relationships, and your self-image. Your actions are reactions

to the pain, stories, memories, and beliefs that are hovering in

your pain-body and your subconscious. Until you cultivate your

self-awareness, it is difficult to figure out what is informing your

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thinking, behavior and way of being.

➢ And having said this: You do not have to know the exact story or

memory in order to heal and transcend its affect. You learn to

identify it by your feeling experience of it, that is all the evidence

you need.

NOTE: Practitioners are not therapists, we deal with beliefs and

the impact of beliefs. We do not attempt to identify or analyze

that which is shared. Everything we do, even with forgiveness,

comes down to the simplest SOM Principle: Cause/Effect.

o (Learning how to describe this truth to your client

WITHOUT putting them on the defensive is one of the most

important skills to learn, develop, and apply. If your client

feels/expresses shame they will not want to look any

further.)

Be willing to feel first!

If you did your homework last week, both reciting the script and

creating your inventory, by now you have begun to feel! All healing

transformation requires that you first allow yourself to feel. Getting in

touch with what you are feeling is necessary because your body will

NEVER lie to you, your body is the very reliable and accurate barometer

of what is going on. Don’t fool yourself, don’t lie to yourself or anyone

else. The subtle pain, upset, stress, fear, that you feel is there to draw

your attention to what needs to be healed, forgiven, understood,

released.

Praise your feelings, bless the experience, it paves the way to

a freer YOU!

Once again, you will need to develop the skill to explain this to

your client with great sensitivity and clarity. You will have an

opportunity to practice this in breakout groups.

Reasons to choose to Forgive:

➢ To attain PEACE.

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➢ To break the patterns that have held you captive.

➢ To free your physical body to heal.

➢ To free up the flow in your life and allow for your financial

freedom.

➢ To develop and keep alive healthy and loving relationships.

➢ To find greater happiness.

➢ What reasons can you add?

Choosing not to forgive:

➢ Keeps you captive by and in your emotions.

➢ Restricts all sorts of energy and flow in your life.

➢ Causes dis-ease in many forms.

➢ Creates a life of loneliness.

➢ Blocks your flow of good in all forms.

➢ What effect has not-forgiving left in you?

WE MUST BUILD OUR ‘WHY’

Ponder this: When you yearn for the freedom that anger, judgment, and

blame block, that very yearning will drive you forward. It is imperative that you

make the conscious choice to FORGIVE. It is also important to remember that

YOU choosing to forgive is not the same as letting someone off the hook for

their actions. That is not your concern. We all live by right of consciousness.

Everyone must meet their own fate on their own time. This is not for your

concern. Focus on your own freedom, your own love, your own health.

(Note: if the actions you are forgiving can harm another human, that is an entirely different situation.

If there are children involved, responsible actions should be taken.)

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If you are someone with trauma in your past, please GO SLOWLY, but still

go. Move gently in the direction of your freedom. Stay present to your heart. It

will take courage to encounter your history, but you can do this. You are not

alone, and I am not just referring to this class, I am referring to the presence of

Spirit in your life and to the shoulders of brave and powerful individuals who

have gone

before you.

No matter what has happened, you have power and resources beyond

your human imagination around you and within you. All of life is working in

your favor even when there doesn’t appear to be the evidence. Trust the

process, stay with it, and go gently, compassionately, and slowly. If you don’t

have a set of spiritual practices, create one that you can commit to, this will be

the foundation for

your strength.

Spirit is seeking to move through you in a

beautiful and free way, let It,

your freedom depends upon it.

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Spiritual Mind Treatments for this process:

Cultivating the Courage to take on Forgiveness

Since I, (state your name), am of the One Intelligence and source of all that is, All

that is, sources Itself to me easily, effortlessly, and abundantly at all moments.

On this day, (place the date), I begin to consciously cultivate the courage to begin

my forgiveness process. I begin to feel and experience myself as an amazingly

courageous and forgiving being. Since Spirit can only express courage and

fearlessness, I must demonstrate courage and fearlessness, because I am of It.

The Essence of all that is knows me intimately and this intimate relationship

settles in me at a cellular and heartfelt level.

Today, I am made anew!

Today, I am more courageous than ever before in my life!

Today, I face my fears and I move forward anyway!

Today, I demonstrate a courageous heart by standing still and strong,

in my chosen and directed faith.

Today, I practice forgiveness because I choose to be free!

My faith opens doors to me. My faith positions me to say yes to my goals and

my heart’s desires. My faith in healing is strong and fierce. My faith gets out of

the way, anything that has been in the way. All resistance is melted and

removed. I surrender to Spirit and allow my process to unfold.

This new way of being begins today and evolves in the most potent and

unending way. Every day I am more free, more alive, and more prosperous,

because I stand strong and face my fears and practice forgiveness.

I live from my gratitude for this and all my good.

AND SO IT IS!

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A treatment to be your forgiveness process. . .

There is One Power, One Presence, One Love, It is everywhere present

and always available to, in, and as me. This One loves me as I am and as I

am not, and It does so always. I am always fully alive in the love of this

One.

I am one with this One. It is alive in me and as me always. Wherever I

am, I open to Its influence, and It avails Itself to me fully, always.

I am willing to love, honor, forgive, and release (place a name) for any

aspect of their behavior, their words, or anything that they might have

had to do with any of my own pain and suffering. I do this not to free

them but to free myself.

I love, honor, forgive, and release myself for holding on to any pain. I

love, honor, and forgive myself for keeping this memory alive within my

mind and heart. I love, honor, forgive, and release myself for any harm I

have done knowingly or unknowingly to myself or others.

I love, honor, and forgive myself for any judgment that I've carried

against myself or any other human. I am made free. The grace of Spirit

washes over me now and it carries away anything unlike love.

It is with a full and grateful heart that I accept this truth as spoken. I am

grateful for the influence of Spirit in my life and I am grateful for the

freedom that I experience because of my dedication to practicing

forgiveness.

I release this word now with full faith and conviction.

And so it is!

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From another angle. . .

There is a power in the Presence of Love, it is everywhere present, always

available and it is beautiful by any measurement. Its beauty and love

capture my attention with every thought I think, every breath I breathe and

with every beat of my heart.

I am one with this One in every way. In my waking moments and my

sleeping moments, I am in union with this one Divine One and all Its

potency.

As I lean into and surrender over to this One, I declare for myself that

anywhere within my consciousness, anywhere within my pain-body,

anywhere within my emotional vibration, where I have held anyone in

judgment or have blamed them for anything, I now choose to let go, to

release and forgive them. Anywhere where these feelings and emotions live

in me, I am now free of any negative affect because I choose to be free. I

am clear. I find a new peace within and declare, “I choose to be free!” I am

willing to let go of any thoughts, pain, stories, or beliefs that have been held

by me in my subconscious. No longer do I live at the mercy of the past.

As of today, I choose to know that all individuals in my life have safe

passage through my mind and my heart. The power of Spirit makes these

choices possible. The love of Spirit soothes my heart, mind, body, and soul.

I practice forgiveness for my own freedom, for my own peace of mind. I trust

that any individual that I have engaged, works out whatever they need to work

out on their own for their own reality. It is not mine to do. My forgiveness is for

me. I am a better person for it. I'm a better human. I am more valuable to this

world because all individuals have free passage through my mind and heart. I

trust my process.

With gratitude and with grace I accept my chosen reality and release all other

experience. I am made whole again and I am grateful for this possibility. Thank

you Spirit for the strength to do this work.

I release this word into the mind of God.

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And so it is!

So far. . .

To create change, we must first choose to be free, regardless of the cause of our pain. The invitation and the path are both hovering within our consciousness all the time. It takes a willingness and a discipline of Mind – both our local mind and Infinity of Mind to have access to us, to take this journey. We must desire our personal freedom more than we want to be right. We are required to recognize that our pain is kept in place because we are holding on to it and are attached to it. We must, and are, empowered to be the one to forgive and let go.

Cultivating our willingness is very, very important. Establishing your “WHY” will help you to move in the right direction. Then, we must learn to surrender to Spirit and allow the Presence to be the healer of all the memories, emotions, and pain that have taken residence within us.

Ultimately, we must believe that there is a rightness and a wisdom that is greater than our human understanding.

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For your clients/students:

There are a few extremely important things to remember:

Everything that we do for ourselves first is what we will be able to bring to our clientele, with some exceptions.

DO NOT BRING YOUR CLIENT ANYWHERE, IF YOU DON’T KNOW HOW TO GET THEM BACK OUT.

If your client has trauma, move SLOWLY OR NOT AT ALL.

Always ask permission to move in any direction that appears tender or to ask a particular question.

Speak slowly, move slowly, ask questions slowly and remind them that you are here to serve, but that they are in charge.

Until you have some experience, take slow steps. You do not want to open a wound that you can’t handle. If you find yourself dealing with something big, be honest. It is okay to suggest that they might want to work with someone with more experience. Talk to another practitioner and/or your minister for support.

NOTE: On more than one occasion, clients have shared some very powerful and painful things with me, revelations that left me quite shaken. Have a plan to deal with this. Have a colleague, minister, or practitioner to support you. Keep your practices consistent so you remain grounded. Most importantly, remember to do your own work.

Be gentle with yourself, you are worth the freedom.

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Learning the forgiveness formula!

Six Steps to continued freedom:

1. Practice some radical honesty by taking an inventory of each-and- every

person with whom you have placed responsibility/blame/fault, including

yourself.

2. Recognize the weight of each name on your list including your own.

Feel into it.

3. Ask yourself these questions:

a. How much lighter would I feel if I choose to forgive/release

this individual?

b. How much freer will I be when I cease placing responsibility with

this individual?

c. What would it feel like to stop blaming myself and to forgive

myself for my past experiences/behavior?

4. Take time to meditate on the place within that has never been hurt,

harmed or injured in any way, the place of your purity and your power,

and IDENTIFY WITH THIS PLACE. This is your one and only true-identity.

5. Use the Spiritual Mind Treatment (provided) with each-and-every

individual that is on your list.

6. Journal about your process, your release, and your gratitude for who you

have become.

We all have a story

You know by now that forgiveness, as a practice is the way

to cut the ties from your story so that you can experience

your true freedom. Through this practice you know that

you will be healthier, happier, and more at peace as will

your clients and students. If you are feeling safe enough by

now, it’s possible that you have begun to recognize that

Forgiveness is for

yourself because it frees

you. It lets you out of

that prison you put

yourself in.

Louise L. Hay

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you made some mistakes in your life and caused some pain to yourself and

others. In addition, you have also begun to recognize the individuals in your life

that caused your life to be different because of the hurt they caused. By now,

you probably want your freedom more than you want to hold on to your anger

and righteousness. But, something in you, something in your heart, continues

to struggle, what do you do? You must look at the stories that you tell over-

and-over again. With each telling of the story, you give it more power, more

credence, more authority over your life.

There is another problem with our stories; it is the same problem as with our

memories. Our memories are inaccurate because they have been impacted by

our emotions. So often what you remember as so – isn’t or isn’t exactly so.

There is what happened to us, and then there is how we remember it, and

hold on to it. We often give authority to stories that deteriorate our life force.

This happens because we focus more on the story and the pain than

remembering that we have the option to heal it and release ourselves from it.

Practicing forgiveness gives you the freedom that you seek from the pain.

It is true that you are who you are, not despite what happened to you, but

because of what happened to you. This is true, but it does not mean that you

want to continue to suffer the consequences of what happened. If you are

conscious, you get to live by choice. This is a powerful message for anyone

practicing this teaching.

Learning from our Spiritual Family:

There are practices throughout humankind that can be adopted.

➢ Ho’oponopono (ho-o-pono-pono) is a Hawaiian practice of reconciliation and forgiveness. Similar

forgiveness practices are performed on islands throughout the South

Pacific, including Hawaii, Samoa, Tahiti and New Zealand.

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➢ The literal translation is: to put to right; to put in order or shape, correct,

revise, adjust, amend, regulate, arrange, rectify, tidy up, make orderly or

neat.

Statements for the practice are:

I am sorry. (Repentance)

Please forgive me. (Ask for forgiveness.) Thank you. (Gratitude) I love you. (Love)

Ho’oponopono is work that is done in consciousness working at the level of true spiritual co-creation. You will need to put time aside to be alone and in complete silence. This work is completed within you and you alone. It is not meant to be a fast process. It takes time, the work is deep.

Reconciliation

Take time one day and research stories of reconciliation. Reading story after story will begin to touch a place inside of you, inside your heart, that will help you put your own life, anger, and upset in perspective with what’s possible. In other words, get into and stay in the conversation around forgiveness. If you are unclear about my reference here, consider these scenarios:

• Imagine the plight of our African American brothers and sisters

who, to this day, still must concern themselves with whether or

not their beautiful son will come home at night. Imagine the fear

of being misidentified as a criminal and always being worried that

because of the color of your skin, because of racism, you might be

shot.

• Imagine the young women, and some men, that still today are

captured and sold into slavery.

• Consider the extensive human sex trafficking that goes unchecked

because of how sophisticated, yet buried, it is in our world’s underbelly.

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• Maybe you or someone you know suffered physical, sexual, or

psychological abuse at the hand of a parent or other family member.

• What about survivors of the Holocaust or those who survived the

bombing of Hiroshima or Rwanda?

When you begin to think about the bigger picture, when you focus

on forgiveness and begin to do research, you will find more stories about

healing and reconciliation than you can possibly imagine. This research

will change you. Reading these stories will alter your way of seeing the

world. AND, ultimately, the hope here is that a deep compassion for

humanity will grow within you and everything will begin to look different.

Over time, you will see your perpetrators, and hopefully yourself, as one

who deserves to be freed from your mind.

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Rituals and other influences:

1. Use Mother Nature - tell your story to a tree or a stone.

Option One:

Take the pain you are feeling, something that is the result of the

prolonged anger and go to a safe place out in Nature, sit under a tree (a

great choice) and tell the tree your pain, your anger, your story. Now ask

the tree to take this from you so that you can go and be more fully and

freely expressed. Remember to thank your tree. The tree has no

attachment to your anger, and the wisdom of Mother Nature will support

your process.

Option Two, using a stone: Pick up a stone and speak these same truths

into your chosen stone then either, bury it or throw it into a body of

water.

Another option for a stone: If you have moved to a more complete place

in your forgiveness, you can also use a stone as a reminder of your letting

go. (I keep these stones and I use this process more for my self-

forgiveness.) Use this ritual to feel complete about what you have gone

through, to celebrate yourself and your willingness to forgive. This is a

great ritual to use after you have done your work and to be in a place of

self-love. I keep these stones in a place I can see them, maybe you have

an altar. They serve as a wonderful reminder and they carry the energy of

your intention.

HOW: Choose a stone, speak into the stone, your declaration to

forgive yourself for all your transgressions known and not known.

Practicing radical honesty, state all the things that you are willing to be

forgiven for and release yourself from any self-judgement.

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2. Jesus

The teachings of Jesus center around two very specific themes: Love and

Forgiveness. I am often inspired by the story of Jesus’ path. Consider

these readings for support:

o Matthew 18: 21-22

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I

forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?

“Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy times

seven times.”

o Luke 6:37

Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.

o John 8:7

When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, “If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.”

o Luke 23:34

Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they

are doing." And they divided up his clothes by casting lots.

3. Deep Spiritual Surrender/Grace

o Asking for Grace - One of the most advanced forms of forgiveness

results as the effect of investing time in developing a relationship

with the Divine. This is available to you every time you turn

around, every time you close your eyes, every time you exhale and

make room for Spirit. Developing and deepening this relationship

will carry you when moments of doubt slip in; you can always turn

to your intimate relationship with the Divine.

o With a deep relationship, you will be reminded automatically that

you are not that anger (emotion) that you are feeling. Having a

place to surrender into is all about having a deeply safe spiritual

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place that is the result of time spent in prayer, meditation, and

study. You must believe in your ultimate good at this point.

▪ You must be able to identify that place within where you

have never been hurt, harmed, or injured in any way,

because that is your God-presence, your potency, your

perfection.

4. Mirror work

▪ Become a friend to that person in the mirror by not looking

away so quickly.

▪ Look, really look into your own eyes, choose to love yourself

the way you love someone dear to you.

5. Create your forgiveness

I, ____________, do now declare that I am worthy of the

grace of God.

I forgive myself for any transgressions known

and not known, on purpose or because I was

unconscious.

I also choose to release (name your offender(s)

_____________, for any and all actions seemingly

against me.

I choose freedom, I choose lightness, I choose health,

and I choose love. Anything that stands in the way of my

chosen reality is now released.

I am made free as I am the place where love resides!

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Never have to forgive again!

Believe it or not, this is the most important week of our time together.

Understanding the importance of forgiveness, learning processes and building

forgiveness skills, and learning to feel safe enough to forgive is all about the

past, all about cleaning up “what was.” To be truly in your power, you must

begin to look at how you can cease creating the reasons to implement this

practice in the first place. Forgiving is good, not needing to forgive is much

better.

Looking around, one might wonder, “How can I control others and their

behavior?” You can’t, but you can learn how to develop the consciousness to

choose your response rather than react. You have within you the mechanism to

do so, you have within you the wisdom, the love, and the will to live a life that

does not require forgiveness. You can have a life where forgiveness is built into

your everyday life.

As your awareness grows, your ability to discover and understand more

about your personal innocence and the innocence of others expands.

IMAGINE THIS: you are walking upon a path when you look down and see

before you a burning hot coal. Because you are wise and because you have

experience, you know that there is no reason to pick up that coal to find out

what you already know. It is hot. As your emotional health grows and expands,

you will have the same option, to view something with that same wisdom in

advance and choose NOT to pick it up, not to own it, not to give it meaning.

Attaining this consciousness does not happen overnight. You must be willing to

commit to your spiritual practices throughout your entire day. You must be

willing to walk through your own baptism-by-fire, without shrinking back.

Be the Change Agent!

Let the pain STOP here,

STOP Now!

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Your expanse demands that you face your fears, walk through them, face your

emotions, walk through them and -

LOVE YOURSELF COMPLETELY THROUGHOUT THIS PROCESS.

AGAIN: Practicing Forgiveness is good,

BUT not needing to forgive is the Ultimate.

Please do not make the mistake and think that this is beyond you, or that

you have reasons that no one understands why you wouldn’t forgive. I do

believe that we have established that there are people all around us that are

like us and they have different and sometimes more dramatic stories. Let’s

acknowledge, however, that everything is relative and that includes pain and

suffering.

The Greatest gift that you can give the world

is to forgive yourself so completely that you are then

willing to forgive others.

Life is practice. Everything we do is a practice. The following practices will be

of great support to you on your path to freedom.

HOW DO WE TRANSCEND THE NEED TO FORGIVE?

WE RESPONSIBLY PRACTICE as we:

Cease judging – OURSELVES & OTHERS

Cease blaming - OURSELVES & OTHERS

Cease fault-finding - OURSELVES & OTHERS

Cease being afraid to take responsibility for our own

experience.

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FIND THE INNOCENCE:

As you continue your work and by that I am referring to everything that

you learned in this class: the skills, tools, mindset and treatments, it is time to

realize that you never meant to do anyone harm, ever, not even yourself.

THEN begin to turn that awareness toward others and realize – although it

might not always appear so – no one meant to do you or anyone else harm

either.

Emma Curtis Hopkins taught us that we are always reaching for our good,

and sometimes while reaching we trip over another human. Most often we find

ourselves in pain by another, albeit unconscious.

In the great work by Marshall Rosenberg, Non-Violent Communication,

we are taught that we are trying to get our needs met. Once again, when we

are unskilled or those around us are unskilled, in an attempt to get those needs

met, we trip over another. It is not on purpose, it is a lack of conscious

awareness about one’s impact upon the world around them. We are all – at

times – unconscious, although it often appears to be a conscious choice.

Finding your innocence, will help you to be gentler than ever before. This

innocence is very important in the bigger picture. Once you subscribe to

recognizing your own innocence, you will be able to slow down the current

moment and choose consciously.

You see, as our awareness grows, we need to build the muscle of discipline.

The discipline to pause before we speak, before we act, before we accuse,

before we judge. As we build our discipline muscle, we will begin to save

ourselves a lot of pain and suffering because it will save us from the pain of our

own actions.

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➢ Become Curious. A critical thing to remember: Judgment and

curiosity cannot exist in the same place at the same time.

Cultivate interest and become curious about who you are,

about the people around you, and about the world in general.

Your openness and curiosity will save you much pain and

suffering.

➢ Become the Observer. Observe your inner reactions, your

judgements, your opinions. Observe them, choose to be

present, take a breath, count to ten - anything that reminds you

to hesitate and rethink automatic reactions, interpretations or

conclusions. You see, we have our thoughts and then we can

choose to believe those thoughts - or not.

USING THE BREATH TO HEAL: Your breath is critical to your life. When you are fearful or anxious, it is common

to hold your breath, albeit an unconscious act. A natural breath is one that

flows easily, effortlessly and from the diaphragm. As adults, the stress of our

lives has caused us to do upper chest breathing which means that we are not in

the flow with the same ease. Using the breath to clear out feelings that are

attempting to take residence in you or in dealing with feelings that have already

taken residence is another way to handle your emotions live time.

Below are a couple of different methods that when properly applied can keep

your breath flowing and allow these emotions to move gently through you.

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TONGLEN MEDITATION: Tonglen meditation is a simple practice of transmutation: the process of breathing in “dirty” energy, thoughts, or feelings, and releasing them with compassionate non-attachment as pure light.

As opposed to the idea of breathing peace and bringing calm into the body and mind, in Tonglen, we breathe in pain and suffering and transform it into peacefulness through non-attachment.

Tonglen is a world-healing practice. But when applied to the self, Tonglen can have miraculous healing effects.

When in pain, this form of meditation may seem like a counter-intuitive process. To breathe in your pain may feel like the last thing you want to do. Instead of breathing in that pain or suffering, it may feel more natural to push it away, stifle it, ignore it, or resist it.

But resistance is attachment, and the more resistance grows the more the suffering you’re trying to avoid grows. As a method of self-healing, over time, the practice of Tonglen can become an automatic response to stress, anger, a bad mood, or general funk.

In the context of application of Tonglen as a self-healing practice, any negative emotion can be an anchor that will remind you to use the breath to transform difficult emotions into pure compassionate release.

Tonglen Process:

1. Notice your suffering. Allow this to be a reminder that you can release that suffering through practice. 2. Still or center yourself for a moment. With a breath or two, find a calm place in your experience of the moment. 3. Notice the negative energy as a cloud around your physical body. 4. With your breath, draw that cloud of suffering into your body. 5. Holding your breath in your chest for a moment, center yourself in non-attachment, and allow the suffering to transform into peace. 6. Release your breath as an exhalation of peace and clarity. 7. Repeat for as long as needed to clear your suffering. Any practice of Tonglen meditation is healing the whole. In the healing of the suffering of self, is the healing of the world.

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There is no self, and there is no other. As one of the innumerable sentient beings pervading time and space, the work you do to free yourself from your own attachment is work toward the liberation of all.

SHAMANIC BREATH: From the book: Courageious Dreaming by Alberto Villoldo

The Shamanic breath is a breath that can be used any time of day, even in front of other people. Although it is highly intentional, it can be used in a very subtle way.

What makes shamanic breathing different is its simplicity. It is about allowing the energy of upset or of past hurts to simply move through you in the gentlest of ways. In the end, it is about not attaching yourself to the pain and letting your breath move the energy through.

The method:

While recalling a thought regarding a pain that has a person attached to the thought or the memory, BREATHE. But, breathe in this way. Breathe in through your nose and out of your mouth, not forcing it or trying to change your natural breath but do change your intention. Be present to the thought and breathe THROUGH the memory or the thought or the image of someone (if an image comes up).

The key is getting present to the feeling experience, setting the intention to release the energy around it and then simply breathe. By letting your breath move the energy out of the way, you should be able to feel a shift in your experience quickly.

BE PROACTIVE

Being proactive is about taking time to have the awareness to stay awake,

aware, to be responsible for your everyday experience and to remember above

all things that you are not at the mercy of what was. You are not at the mercy

of your thoughts. You are not at the mercy of others’ opinions or gossip or

stories, or those that you tell yourself.

You are a child of the Divine, call it what you will. Humans will have pain,

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it is inevitable, but we do not have to subscribe to the pain over-and-over again

like getting caught in a single day like Bill Murray in the movie: Groundhog Day.

Subscribing to the pain is paramount with suffering. This is your point of power;

your point of power is in having the awareness to see your choices before you.

This is a skill that you are capable of cultivating.

Cutting the ties from our ancestry!

There are an infinite number of influences that cause an effect in our life

expression. Let’s revisit one of the pre-suppositions included in the

Foundational Beliefs with which we began at the start of this course:

# 8: You are not at the mercy of what was, not now, not ever!

This statement suggests that we wake up and learn how to identify influences

from all areas of our life and that includes anything that has transpired since we

incarnated, AND we must consider stories filled with ancestral pain.

Remember everything that ever was, still is. Holmes said it this way:

Everything you have every thought, said, done, seen, learned or experienced, has left an imprint upon your subconscious mind. This subconscious also contains memory images of your family life, your ancestral background and the sum of what the whole world has thought or believed. These memories are NOT dead things. Quite the reverse, they are always active. But there is more to it than this. Just as you are being acted upon by your own memories, the mind of history and your environment, you are also being acted upon by the Mind of God which is within and around you. …Today you may be suffering from the effects of the race consciousness and your own beliefs, but today you can begin to change them.

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Considering this as a truth, it is now time to ponder your ancestral

history. What do you know about your family tree – four generations prior?

Where did you family of origin come from? What did they have to endure?

What pain or what joys are within their history?

Saying we are not at the mercy is not enough, we are called to take steps.

Step One: Get current with this lifetime and any imprints left upon you. This happens by applying Spiritual Mind Treatment and the other practices. Step Two: As obvious as this step is, I see aware people forget it and not practice it all the time: Stay fresh with your forgiveness practices. Practice non-judgement so that you don’t create anything new to clean up. Step Three: Begin a practice of treating to release any painful ancestral history whether you know what it is or not. If you are fortunate to have old stories, then you will know where to begin but even if they are not available to you, you know that something is there. Part 2 of Step Three: If you have abuse of any kind as part of your history, begin to work with the many layers of pain, this means: one generation at a time.

In the words of Carl Jung: “Until you make the unconscious conscious, it

will direct your life and you will call it fate.”

Carl Jung’s words are true, but what we know is that the human ability to

recall information is less then effective and accurate. If we were at the mercy

of remembering all the influences within our lifetime or to be able to track the

ancestral influences and history, we would be ineffective. This is where the

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Science of Mind becomes the greatest tool ever. Spiritual Mind

Treatment/Prayer Treatment has no limitation, it can reach parts of our

subconscious that no cognitive attempt could reach.

Radical Honesty

Radical Honesty is an aspect of growing one’s self-awareness and is a

solution to Spiritual Bypass, a large issue in many spiritual communities. Radical

Honesty is the art of learning how to read the clues of your life and your body

without judgment in order to know what one believes. As we practice Radical

Honesty and learn to make honest assessments about our life, we will notice all

that needs to be to be healed, realized, or released. Our life itself is the

indicator as we learn to read the signs – without judgment.

It cannot be emphasized strongly enough – WITHOUT JUDGMENT, if we

do not learn to read ourselves and leave behind judgment simultaneously, we

will not continue to look and take responsibility. Without judgment means you

are looking at yourself through tender and compassionate eyes.

If you are wondering, “What about all the good things that work?” This

applies in the very same way. A life filled with joy, success, prosperity, and

health is equally an indicator of influences from our past, from our families, and

from our history. But because they are blessings, there is nothing for us to do

but count them and be conscious of the gift that they are.

What to do? First, let’s once again begin with the why, why do you have to look

deeper? The easiest way to begin is by is looking at patterns and trends in your

life that you have struggled to transcend. What are those patterns, habits, and

health conditions that you just can’t seem to shake, those patterns that are not

obvious, that you can’t put your finger on? You will want to try and recognize

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those inner beliefs that you know keep circulating through your mind,

distracting you, that you just can’t seem to shake. These are indicators that we

must look deeper within our families and the collective memories that we have

adopted.

Here are a couple of simple ways to begin the root of the problem:

Take an inventory of your family history, talk to your parents,

grandparents and other elders of your family. Find out their

version of the reality of the history of your family. Remember all of

what is told to you will be tainted by their own emotions.

Memories are rarely dependable. Do not take this step unless your

feel safe.

If you do feel unsafe, don’t wait to find out the stories, simply

read the fruit of your tree. You are the tree; your life results are

the fruit of that tree. Learn to read the results can be as affective

as reading a map. What you find is not your Truth but can be an

indicator of your influences – both known and unknown. What is -

will guide you to know where to look and what next steps to take.

We take time to forgive ancestors to break the chain of pain. Any

collective beliefs that have entered your experience unconsciously that is not

empowering, is worth clearing out.

Let’s consider some well-known and well-worn limiting ideas that none of us

own alone:

Any types of racism and bigotry

Any type of caste system that would keep you limited by your birth place

Any conditioning regarding the roles and limitations regarding sexism,

and the roles men and women should or shouldn’t play

If you were born Jewish, you are already aware of the history that has so

much pain inherent within it.

Americans carry numerous painful emotional scars – mostly unconscious

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- from how we took over this land we call ours by raping the land and its

people, to the slaves that we purchased to secure our profits, the way

that we have created our own caste system born of the financial inequity

that is our reality.

If you entered this lifetime with an illness, or your children have an illness

the source of which confuses you, it is time to look at your ancestral

lineage.

At every turn in this No Mud, No Lotus process, we work with our Word to

create true transformation. Here is a declaration for your use:

I stand here strong and conscious, surrendering to the One all my pain and all of its sources, both known and not known. Because I have come here to be the one who breaks the chain of pain, I do so consciously as I speak my word for my family for seven generations back. For my family who is alive – may we all begin to feel the love of God as it heals our collective pain. May we no longer be at its mercy. I willingly choose to love, honor, forgive and release all involved so that I am FREE. For any family that I lost within my lifetime - may we all begin to feel the love of God as it heals our collective pain. May we no longer be at its mercy. I willingly choose to love, honor, forgive, and release all involved so that I am FREE and so that you may be made FREE! For the parents and grandparents of my family members - may we all begin to feel the love of God as it heals our collective pain. May we no longer be at its mercy. I willingly choose to love, honor, forgive, and release all involved so that I am FREE and so that you may be made FREE! And for those beyond my memory or my families’ memory - may we all begin to feel the love of God as it heals our collective pain. May we no longer be at its mercy. I willingly choose to love, honor, forgive, and release all involved so that I am FREE and so that you may be made FREE!

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My declaration. . .

Hurt people, hurt people.

Healed people, heal people.

I choose to be the latter and I choose to stand in my place of power and simply

declare: NO MORE.

Having said this:

I dedicate my time, my invested healing time, in being the place where what

was, and all its’ pain, is now neutralized. Yes, I am the place where what was

ceases and what’s possible begins. Right here, right now, any and all family

lineage of pain, suffering, abuse, of any kind are exposed to the light and love

and wisdom of Spirit through me. I call forth this transformative intelligence

that makes all things anew. I look upon the lineage of my family with the eyes

of love, acceptance, compassion, and forgiveness knowing that which I look

with creates my experience.

As I focus all my attention on this transformation, I declare that anyone

involved in causing pain, or allowed pain to be perpetrated, did so out of their

own pain. I choose now to forgive them and forgive their ignorance. I know this

for my current family, for my family of origin, for my grandparents, and my

great grandparents. I know this for seven generations past. I choose to look at

and contemplate upon my lineage with Love, with Compassion, and with

Forgiveness. I choose to stop naming any of this activity as bad or as wrong.

I now identify with my family as healed, as whole, and as transformed. I cease

subscribing to any of the pain. I cease identifying with any piece of the story. I

am new, I am free, I am the place where love resides, and I invite in my entire

family. This place that I stand is a place of love, and it is pure, sacred, and holy,

yes, I stand in and live from this holy and whole place.

With complete confidence in the power of creation of my word, I surrender this

word to Love and to Law.

And so it is!

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In summary:

Let me say clearly here. All forgiveness is an inside job, and it must begin

with you forgiving YOU! Through releasing yourself, you will find yourself

wanting to experience more and more compassion. This compassion will drive

you to forgive others, if for no other reason than for your own personal

freedom. God has a big idea, it is you, fully expressed, and to be fully expressed

you must be free.

Please stay in touch with your WHY. The world needs more and more

people who are willing to love, to forgive, to try again, to forgive and to try

again. You are the one that Spirit wants to express through. You are the place

where love resides.

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Addendum Constructing a Forgiveness Treatment

As a licensed practitioner, you know how to treat. This information is not meant

to replace anything that you are doing, it is meant to compliment and expand

your perception, understanding and skills. The significant focus is two-fold: 1)

This is information to specifically to support the practitioner in working with

clients on forgiveness. 2) Its unique value is the language suggested to address

the repository of the subconscious.

Essential elements of a forgiveness-focused treatment:

1. Language that focuses on the full purging of the subconscious.

2. Filling the recently created void with language supporting the

values and qualities to be increased and adopted.

3. Speak the name of each person that is the focus on the client’s

forgiveness list appropriate to the current treatment. (These

names will be garnered during the inquiry.)

4. After requesting (and receiving) the client’s consent, always

complete the forgiveness process with forgiveness that the client

accepts for themselves.

5. To complete this specific focus of treatment, always ask the

client to describe how this fully forgiven- transformed experience

will show up and how will it FEEL.

6. Never proceed without these elements of release and realization

of the transformed state of being.

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Some Suggested language. . . (Always find your own language.) These suggested steps are meant to be incorporated into the current form of treatment.

They are NOT meant to replace your flow and clearly, you would incorporate additional

language and focus.

(Do not compare these five elements with the steps of treatment, they are not the same.)

Steps & Purpose Suggested language, but please find your own.

1. Begin with a normal recognition & unification

While doing this remember to invoke the name of your client.

2. Go directly to the subconscious: FIRST, WE PURGE THE INFLUENCE

Everything within (client’s name) subconscious, every memory, belief, story, judgment, fear that has lived within (client’s name) subconscious and that has supported and informed this condition is right here, right now, uprooted, cast out, and neutralized; never again to be of any influence over (Client’s name).

3. Now, we fill that newly cleared space

As (Client’s name) releases anything and everything that has ever distracted them from their wholeness, they now - right now - experience an abundance of self-love, self-acceptance and self-confidence, more than ever before in their life. (Articulate the specific qualities for this treatment request.)

4. The forgiveness practice: Use the names identified in the inquiry. Ask permission for each. Ruse language to remind that forgiving each person is for their personal freedom.

(For Each name of the ones being forgiven and released.) (Client’s name) has agreed to practice forgiveness. We begin by calling for (focus of forgiveness), (Client) has agreed to love, honor, forgive and release (focus of forgiveness), to care for their own karmic debt so that (Client’s name) can be made free.

5. Fully transformed: Always remember to ask this question and incorporate the answer into the close of the treatment along with the FEELING tone. It must include the feeling tone. For example: Fully and completely transformed, Michelle is now experiencing the freedom that comes because of her dedication to forgiveness. Michelle now gets to experience the freedom, self-

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confidence and love that is the gift of forgiveness. Not only is she free and living in the flow of goodness, but she gets to feel the lightness, grace and joy of being free.

6 Closing out Close out your treatment as you normally would with gratitude and release.

What is critical in guiding a client through the forgiveness process to satisfy the inquiry/interview process for that client. To facilitate an effective inquiry:(1) move slowly, (2) ask permission, and (3) ask questions and reflect back to your client what you heard your client say. MOST IMPORTANT, REMAIN CURIOUS. AND DO NOT PUSH YOUR CLIENT PAST THEIR WILLINGNESS or they will not feel safe and you cannot succeed without your client or yourself for that matter, feeling safe.

For the effectiveness and essence of the inquiry: remain curious and compassionate. Engage empathy/not sympathy. Your empathy, albeit it silent and at the heart level, should stay present for the one(s) who your client believes is at fault.

Collusion or Collaboration Be aware that you carry your sensitivities into the session and those sensitivities should not to be verbalized or rejected to the client, who initially might feel better if you agree with their anger, resentment and upset. To agree is to collude with their less than. You are there for your client, but the practitioner’s mindset should always stay focused on the client ‘s Truth and their impact on the world around them. This is to collaborate with their possibility. The practitioner never wants to agree with the story or agree to make the subject of this work the villain. It is the job of the practitioner to represent total and complete healing. In order to do this, we must hold in our consciousness an innocence about all parties involved.

WE ARE HERE TO REPRESENT FORGIVENESS HOLISTICALLY

- INCLUDING ALLOWING FOR THE INNOCENCE OF ALL

CONCERNED!

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We are called to heal the consciousness that exists that allowed this

event/condition to emerge in the first place. We cannot identify with any single

perspective or get caught in any kind of agreement. Agreement serves to

perpetuate/exacerbate the act, action and effect. We must compassionately

understand that “hurt people, hurt people” while remaining present to this

understanding throughout the time with our client.

We are always faced with two choices: Collude with someone’s less-than or

Collaborate with the greater possibility.

Choose wisely, it will define you as a practitioner.

When we collude/agree with their need to blame, we add to their pain and

collude with the overall suffering of the consciousness in the world. There is no

Private Good AND agreement with pain and suffering increases the expression

of this pain and suffering in the world.

We practice forgiveness and facilitate the practice of forgiveness:

➢ To cease identifying with the pain which will in turn, cease informing our

behavior and choices.

➢ To support and help to alleviate the suffering for individuals and to teach

them that they are more than what may have happened to them.

➢ To begin to remove this pain as influence in the world at large.

➢ To remember who we are and remind our clients who they are as we

return to the Infinite One in complete surrender.

We know there is only One, so our responsibility is to the Whole – always. That

is why we take on forgiveness in a holistic fashion. We work to shift the

consciousness, not just the false evidence of pain and suffering sitting before

you. Your role is much bigger than any individual or the moment. Therefore, we

must do our own inner work first.

For the health of the practitioner:

There will be times when someone will share some painful stories. Your heart

will be shocked, your mind will go into confusion and you will question how is it

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that humans can perpetrate upon another human the acts that they do? And

very possibly if the story is about the harm that was perpetrated on a child, you

will have to work to reconcile this even more.

You must be able to either stay grounded in Truth or you must excuse yourself

and recommend another practitioner. The skills being suggested here are high

level and not for the faint of heart. Have your own practitioner on speed dial if

you find your mind and heart exploding from shock or confusion.

PERSONAL SHARING: I have worked with many women and some men who have been sexually abused including

rape from very age. Repeatedly and often the perpetrator is not held accountable for their

acts. Be prepared, within yourself, to deal with this fact. Get to know who you are. Get

present to your feelings. This fact, with very graphic stories can unnerve the best of us. More

than once, I have closed out a session and went off in tears. This is part of my process.

Identify and honor an effective process for yourself.

I am including a resource from the National Sexual Violence Resource Center for your own

edification. Being informed empowers you to handle the subject with greater understanding

and sensitivity and compassion. AND, you need to keep in mind that most of your clients will

not lead with this information even though this is in their experience and has influence over

them. It is through patient, compassionate and effective listening, curiosity and sensitive

excavation that it is revealed.

National Sexual Violence Resource Center: https://www.nsvrc.org/statistics

NOTE: I have formed a tribe called: Freedom From Me Too. Currently, it is a brand-new

community that is being hosted in a program called Slack. If you have any history of this kind

or want to recognize a client, please refer them to me directly through:

revjerseygirl@gmail.com

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I wish for you. . .

Forgiveness

May your heart feel safe to feel, to open, to heal.

May your desire for freedom outweigh your reason to be angry or resentful.

May you forgive yourself and all others, for anything and everything that could hinder your natural state of joy.

May all people have safe passage through your heart and mind.

May the Presence of God bring you Peace now and forever more.

May your motivation to heal give you the strength you need to let go.

And may your body, mind, and soul be healed through your Truth being revealed.

Rev. Michelle Wadleigh