Writing Your Personal Statement

Writing Your Personal Statement

Day One:Exploring the TopicsPrompt #1Some students have a background or story that is so central to their identity that they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story.

Prompt #2Recount an incident or time when you experienced failure. How did it affect you, and what lessons did you learn?

Prompt #3Reflect on a time when you challenged a belief or idea. What prompted you to act? Would you make the same decision again?

Prompt #4Describe a place or environment where you are perfectly content. What do you do or experience there, and why is it meaningful to you?

Prompt #5Discuss an accomplishment or event, formal or informal, that marked your transition from childhood to adulthood within your culture, community, or family.

ImagineAny of these people could be your readers!Admissions officer with 40 years of experience, female, HarvardConservative Nigerian, 60 years old, male, AshesiMuslim, 24 years old, female, NYU-Abu DhabiLiberal, gay, 24 years old, female, OberlinRepublican, Christian, male, UT-AustinEccentric professor, 35 years old, male, Berklee College of Music

Day Two:Elements of the Personal EssayWhat is the Personal Essay?A personal essay often combines the elements of both the narrative (story) and the memoir (autobiography). Think of the personal essay as an insight on your life or your personal beliefs that you convey to your reader by sharing the experiences and relationships that have shaped you.More simply put:Personal essay = narration + reflection/evaluation

Key Ingredients of the Personal EssayFOCUS: What do you want your reader to know about you? What is the focus idea of your essay? Think of focus as a string that needs to run through your essay.

ORGANIZATION: Whats the beginning, middle, and end of your essay? How do you organize your ideas so your reader does not get lost? Think of organization as a frame which helps you structure your ideas.

NARRATION: What moments do you describe for your reader that best capture your focus idea? What vivid details and vivid language do you to describe these moments? Think of narration as a making a movie; capture what you see through your lens.

REFLECTION: What is the significance of the moments (stories) you described? Why are they meaningful? Think of reflection as the commentary or the narrators voice in a movie that comments on the action.

NARRATION Be descriptive by using:SENSORY DETAILS (sight, sound, taste, touch, smell)FIGURATIVE LANGUAGE (similes, metaphors, imagery) DIALOGUE (character speaks)FLASHBACK (jump back in time)FLASH FORWARD (jump forward in time)ZOOM IN (close up)ZOOM OUT (big picture view)Example of NarrationWhen I needed a new jacket and my mother asked what kind I wanted, I described something like bikers wear: black leather and silver studs with enough belts to hold down a small town. We were in the kitchen, steam on the windows from her cooking. She listened so long while stirring dinner that I thought she understood for sure the kind I wanted. The next day when I got home from school, I discovered draped on my bedpost a jacket the color of day-old guacamole. I threw my books on the bed and approached the jacket slowly, as it were a stranger whose hand I had to shake. I touched the vinyl sleeve, the collar, and peeked at the mustard-colored lining. -Gary Soto, The Jacket

REFLECTIONIts when you hit the pause button on your narration and you consider the meaning of the moment you are describing. Some reflecting phrases:I realizedI understood..I learnedI believedI thought

Examples of ReflectionI blame that jacket for those bad years. I blame my mother for her bad taste and her cheap ways. It was a sad time for the heart. With a friend I spent my sixth-grade year in a tree in the alley, waiting for something good to happen to me in that jacket, which had become the ugly brother who tagged along wherever I went. And it was about that time that I began to grow. -Gary Soto, The JacketWay

Think about organization as FRAMING:Your beginning, middle and ending ORGANIZATION Types of Frames:#1 Chronological Narrative

The writer has a sequential and linear beginning, middle and ending.

#2 Circular Narrative

The writer begins and ends with the same sentence, person or idea.

#3 Eccentric Narrative

The writer chooses an unconventional structure. Note: This is the most challenging frame. The structure needs to work with the purpose, not detract from it.To consider

What is an effective frame for capturing your story? Where should you begin?Where should you end?

Experiment with different frames!

Activity: Part OnePut on a writers hat to:Decide what the essays frame is: chronological, circular, or eccentricIdentify areas in the essay where the writer uses narrative techniques. Underline these lines and put an N (for narration) next to them in the margins.Identify areas in the essay where the writer provides reflection. Underline these lines and put a R (for reflection) next to them in the margins.Activity: Part TwoNow put on an admissions counselors hat and discuss:What seems to be the controlling idea of the essay? What does this writer seem to want the reader to know about him/her?What you have learned about this candidate? What has this individual communicated to you about who he/she is and what do you think he/she will contribute to your campus community?

Discussion QuestionsHow does the writer begin the piece? How is the rest of the essay organized? How does it the piece end? Is it effective? Why or why not? What occasions does the writer use to captureto show rather than tellthis controlling idea? What narrative techniques are used? Where does the writer reflect on the significance of the experience? Where does the writer give the reader some sense on the purpose of this occasion? What words does the writer use that really make his or her voice come alive for you?

Words of Advice from ProfessionalsProspective students will often ask me if a good essay will really get them accepted. The truth is that while no essay will make an unqualified student acceptable, a good essay can help a qualified applicant stand out from the competition. A good essay just might be what turns a maybe into a yes. -Connecticut Colleges Dean of Admission Martha Merrill

While there is no magic formula for the perfect admission essay, there are a few things prospective college students should know. Here are my Top Ten tips:Write about yourself. A great history paper on the Civil War might be very well written, but it doesnt tell me anything about the writer. Regardless of the topic, make sure you shine through your essay.Use your own voice. I can tell the difference between the voice of a 40-year-old and a high school senior.Focus on one aspect of yourself. If you try to cover too many topics in your essay, youll end up with a resume of activities and attributes that doesnt tell me as much about you as an in-depth look at one project or passion.Be genuine. Dont try to impress me, because Ive heard it all. Just tell me what is important to you.Consider a mundane topic. Sometimes its the simple things in life that make the best essays. Some of my favorites have included essays that reflect on the daily subway ride to school, or what the family goldfish observed from the fishbowl perched on the family kitchen table. It doesnt have to be a life-changing event to be interesting and informative.Tips from the Professionals Dont rely on how to books. Use them to get your creative juices flowing, but dont adhere too rigidly to their formulas, and definitely dont use their example topics. While there are always exceptions, the what my room says about me essay is way overdone.Share your opinions, but avoid anything too risky or controversial. Your essay will be read by a diverse group of individuals from a wide range of backgrounds, so try to appeal to the broadest audience possible.Tell a good story. Show me why you are compassionate; dont tell me you are. Show me that you have overcome great difficulty; dont start your essay with I have overcome great difficulties.Dont repeat what is already in your application. If you go to a performing arts school and all of your extracurricular activities and awards relate to dance, dont write about how much you love dancing. Tell me something I couldnt know just from reading the other parts of your application.Finally, dont forget about the supplements. The supplement questions are very important you should plan to spend as much time on them as you do on your essay. A well-written essay wont help if your supplement answers are sloppy and uninformative.

Source: Tip Sheet: And Admssions Dean Offers Advice on Writing Advice on a College EssayTips ContinuedDay ThreeGetting Started: On the Road to Your Rough DraftSuggestions if you are stuckCreate a timeline of significant events in your life. Try to get at least 20 items on your list. Include major events. Begin with birth and go throughinclude moments such as starting school, first time moments, births, deaths, transitions, beginnings etc. Go back and insert more mundane moments you remember that have marked your life in some way a special meal, a moment of disappointment, a favorite gift, a memorable school occasion, an apology, a confession, a scar, a habit, a job, a fear.. Choose one of your favorite photos and narrate what is going one and why it is important to youCreate lists. List special places. List disappointments. List coming-of-age moments, list aspects of your identity. Go back and circle one that interests you.Just write and do not stop. Let your pen dig up ideas. Write for at least ten minutes straight without stopping. Go back and underline interesting ideas. If none, continue writing.

Your HomeworkOver the July/August break, you will write at least one essay. This essay should go through several iterations (not a one-draft wonder). Ms. D will send you an email with suggestions. You should also read other sample essays to help you think about your own essay. More specifically, you should to read, read, read to absorb language and different ways of expressing ideas. All second year students need to arrive with an essay draft. In the first few weeks of your YR2 English class, you will take your essays through a more formal revision stage and and receive feedback from your teachers Opening Sentences: How to Have an Effective Beginning(from 2012 Stanford applicants essays)On a hot Hollywood evening, I sat on a bike, sweltering in a winter coat and furry boots.While traveling through the daily path of life, have you ever stumbled upon a hidden pocket of the universe?Cancer tried to defeat me, and it failed.Flying over enemy territory, I took in Beiruts beautiful skyline and wondered if under different circumstances I would have hopped on a bus and come here for my vacation. Instead, I saw the city from the window of a helicopter, in military uniform, my face camouflaged, on my way to a special operation deep behind enemy lines.I change my name each time I place an order at Starbucks.I was paralyzed from the waist down. I would try to move my leg or even shift an ankle but I never got a response. This was the first time thoughts of death ever crossed my mind.As an Indian-American, I am forever bound to the hyphen.Unlike many mathematicians, I live in an irrational world; I feel that my life is defined by a certain amount of irrationalities that bloom too frequently, such as my brief foray in front of 400 people without my pants.

Source: http://alumni.stanford.edu/get/page/magazine/article/?article_id=31010Quote from Annie LaMottTelling the truth in an interesting way turns out to be about as easy and pleasurable as bathing a cat