Presents

The Physiology of ForgivenessCan You Afford to

be Unforgiving?Arlene R. Taylor PhDwww.arlenetaylor.orgBrain References

Health and ForgivenessArlene R. Taylor PhD Realizations Inc

There’s something called the

‘physiology of forgiveness’

being unable to forgive other

people’s faults is harmful to

one’s health —Herbert Benson MD

Forgiveness is ScripturalArlene R. Taylor PhD www.arlenetaylor.org

Forgive and you will be forgiven —Luke

6:37

Forgive as the Lord has forgiven you. —Colossians 3:13

Forgive us our debts as we also have forgiven our debtors —Matthew 6:12

If you do not forgive (others) their sins, yours will not be forgiven —Matthew 6: 15

Forgiveness Doesn’t MeanArlene R. Taylor PhD www.arlenetaylor.org

Denying the other person’s responsibility for the wrong

Condoning bad behavior: minimizing, justifying, or excusing the injury / wrong

Waiving right to justice / compensation

Choosing to reconcile or remaining in an abusive relationship / environment

If a Crime Is InvolvedArlene R. Taylor PhD Realizations Inc

Forgiveness has NOTHING to do with absolving acriminal of his/her crime . . .

It has EVERYTHING to do with relieving oneself of the burden of being a victim—letting go of the pain and transforming oneself from victim to survivor. C. R. Strahan

What Forgiveness IsArlene R. Taylor PhD Realizations Inc

You give up your right to exact retribution from theindividual who hurt orwronged you

You choose to think about something else rather than harboring resentment

You refrain from repeatedly bringing up the incident to yourself and/or others

Forgiveness is About YOUArlene R. Taylor PhD www.arlenetaylor.org

Studies have shown clearly:

1. The one who is unforgiving suffers the most

2. The one to be forgiven does not need to know or even still be alive

3.Forgiveness benefits the forgiver (you) the most

Forgiveness Type ConfusionArlene R. Taylor PhD Realizations Inc

Some confuse human forgiveness with Diety forgiveness ― perhaps because many religions emphasize how completely God forgives

Humans cannot forgive at that level but they can forgive

Human forgiveness is far less about “others” and far more about “you”

How God ForgivesArlene R. Taylor PhD Realizations Inc

Praise the Lord . . . who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases ―King David, Psalm 103: 2-3 NIV

Will tread our sins underfoot and hurl all iniquities into the depths of the sea

―Jeremiah 31:34

Will forgive their wickedness and remember their sins no more

—Micah 7: 19

Reasons to ForgiveArlene R. Taylor PhD Realizations Inc

1. It’s the right thing to do because all human beings make mistakes and fall short of the ideal

2. In order to receive forgiveness for your mistakes

3. To preserve your healthif you choose unforgiveness, you will likely be the one who pays most dearly

Two Types of ForgivenessArlene R. Taylor PhD Realizations Inc

At least two types of forgiveness pop up in the literature: decisional and emotional

Decisional forgiveness

A behavioral intention to resist an unforgiving stance

A choice to respond differently toward a transgressor (letting go of bitterness, grudges, resentment, and revenge)

Two Types, Cont’dArlene R. Taylor PhD www.arlenetaylor.org

Emotional forgiveness:

The replacement of negative unforgiving emotions with positive other-oriented emotions

Involves psychophysiological changes

Has greater positive direct health and well-being consequences

CaveatArlene R. Taylor PhD www.arlenetaylor.org

Humans tend to rememberand rehearse what they thought they’ve forgiven

The cemetery metaphor can be helpful

Bury all the mistakes, injuries, and wrongs that you have forgiven

No headstones! That way you can’t go back and dig up what I’ve forgiven and buried

Break Time!

Part Two after the break

Forgiveness Health ImpactArlene R. Taylor PhD Realizations Inc

Psychoneuroimmunology (PNI) research:what you think about can alter levels of several chemicals in your brain and body

Every thought you think alters your neurochemistry changes the chemical composition in your brain and body, impacts yourenergy, and enhances or suppresses immune system function

You May Say . . .Arlene R. Taylor PhD www.arlenetaylor.org

Your brain and body know and long term this will have impact your health

Examples:

Anger - adrenalin, dopamine

Sadness - serotonin

Laughter - dopamine, serotonin, and endorphins

But no one knows I’m unforgiving . . .

Thoughts Mental PictureArlene R. Taylor PhD www.arlenetaylor.org

I hate ______ and Iwon’t forgive . . .

I regret what happened and \ I forgive ______ for the benefits I receive

Your choice will impact both brain and body

The Health ConnectionArlene R. Taylor PhD www.arlenetaylor.org

When you say “I forgive you,” you’re also saying “I want to be healthy”

The act of forgiving allows the body to turn down the manufacture ofcatabolic chemicals, and instructs the subconscious to banish negative feelings from the mind

Doctors Arnold Fox and Barry FoxAuthors of Wake Up! You’re Alive!

Grid StudyArlene R. Taylor PhD Realizations Inc

By thinking (imagining) your brain changes

Grid Study results:

Actual experience

Virtual experience

PET Scans showed little if any difference in changes to brain imaging print-outs

Brain-Body Arlene R. Taylor PhD Realizations Inc

Neurons (thinking cells) are found in the brain and many other placesin the body, including:

•Heart (40,000+ neurons)•Solar Plexus (large clusters)•GI Tract (1,000,000 neurons, 90% of the serotonin and 50% of the dopamine in your brain and body)

The Health ImpactArlene R. Taylor PhD Realizations Inc

If you choose unforgiveness, studies have shown negative side affects, including:

• stress levels and muscle tension• levels of adrenaline and cortisol• blood pressure and heart rate• risk for depression, heart disease, stroke, and cancer•Suppressed immune function •Impaired neurological function / memory

Health Impact, Cont’dArlene R. Taylor PhD www.arlenetaylor.org

If you choose decisional and emotional forgiveness, studies have shownpositive outcomes, including:

•Healthier relationships•Lower blood pressure •Less anxiety, stress, and hostility •Fewer symptoms of depression •Lower risk of alcohol / substance abuse• compassion, kindness, and peace• mental, physical, and spiritual health

To Forgive or Not to ForgiveArlene R. Taylor PhD www.arlenetaylor.org

Unforgiveness results in negativeoutcomes to your health andoverall wellbeing

Forgiveness results in positive outcomes to your brain and body, receiving forgiveness for your negative-consequence behaviors, and increase health and wellbeing

Summary GuidelinesArlene R. Taylor PhD Realizations Inc

Although humans never forgive at God’s level, they can follow guidelines:

1.Choose to forgive - step 1 and step 2

2.Bury what you forgive - no headstones

3.Stop talking about them – no rehearsing

4.Be healthy and prosper – even as your soul prospers

Practical ApplicationArlene R. Taylor PhD Realizations Inc

As a Preacher’s Kid anddealing with critical churchmembers, my father said hefound the parable of the sower helpful

A phone call last week reminded me of some of those childhood experiences

It had to do with Soquel Campmeeting . . .

ObservationsArlene R. Taylor PhD Realizations Inc

People who have a strong spiritual ethic tend to be forgiving at both step 1 and step 2

Those who are religiously rigid—but not very spiritual—may be less forgiving and more critical, judgmental, and even vindictive

Middle-Ages persecution

Palestinian wars

Iraq-Pakistan conflicts

Forgiveness is About YouArlene R. Taylor PhD Realizations Inc

1. Do you want forgiveness?

2. Who do you need to forgive?

3. How big is your cemetery?

4. How healthy do you want to be?

It’s your choice…

—The End—