•STUDY FOR STUDY FOR QUIZQUIZ

DO NOW:DO NOW:

• What does the phrase “stand up for What does the phrase “stand up for yourself” mean?yourself” mean?

Building Healthy Peer Building Healthy Peer RelationshipsRelationships

CommunicationCommunication

• The process of sharing information, The process of sharing information, thoughts, or feelings.thoughts, or feelings.

• Communicating is a skill.Communicating is a skill.

• These skills include “I” messages, These skills include “I” messages, active listening, assertiveness and active listening, assertiveness and appropriate body language.appropriate body language.

““I” MessagesI” Messages

• Is a statement that expresses your Is a statement that expresses your feelings, but does not blame or judge feelings, but does not blame or judge the other person.the other person.

• Example page 136Example page 136

Active ListeningActive Listening

• Is focusing your Is focusing your full attention full attention on what the on what the other person is saying and letting that other person is saying and letting that person know you understand and care.person know you understand and care.

• An active listener responds to what is being An active listener responds to what is being said.said.

• The listener makes the speaker feel The listener makes the speaker feel comfortable about opening up and comfortable about opening up and expressing feelings.expressing feelings.

Types of AssertivenessTypes of Assertiveness

• Passive-Passive- people who hold back their people who hold back their true feelings and go along with true feelings and go along with others.others.

• Aggressive-Aggressive- people who express people who express opinions and feelings in a way that opinions and feelings in a way that may seem threatening or may seem threatening or disrespectful to other people.disrespectful to other people.

• Assertive- Assertive- people who are able to people who are able to stand up for themselves while stand up for themselves while expressing their feelings in a way expressing their feelings in a way that doesn’t threaten other people.that doesn’t threaten other people.

Body LanguageBody Language

• Includes posture, gestures, facial Includes posture, gestures, facial expressions, and body movements.expressions, and body movements.

• People are often unaware of the People are often unaware of the silent messages silent messages sent by their body sent by their body language.language.

CooperationCooperation

• Working together towards a common Working together towards a common goal.goal.

• Examples?Examples?

• Cooperation builds strong Cooperation builds strong relationships that are based on a relationships that are based on a mutual trust, caring, and mutual trust, caring, and responsibility.responsibility.

CompromiseCompromise

• Is the willingness of each person to Is the willingness of each person to give up something in order to reach give up something in order to reach an agreement.an agreement.

• Is a skill of give and take.Is a skill of give and take.

Compromise (cont.)Compromise (cont.)

• Possible solutions: when you are willing to Possible solutions: when you are willing to compromise, you let the other person know compromise, you let the other person know how important the relationship is to you.how important the relationship is to you.

• When not to compromise: when something When not to compromise: when something is dangerous or against your values.is dangerous or against your values.

-instead of compromising be assertive and -instead of compromising be assertive and take a stand and make it clear about how take a stand and make it clear about how you feel.you feel.

FriendshipsFriendships

• Is a relationship based on mutual Is a relationship based on mutual trust, acceptance, and common trust, acceptance, and common interests or values.interests or values.

• People look to their friends for People look to their friends for honest reactions, encouragement honest reactions, encouragement during bad times, and understanding during bad times, and understanding when they make mistakes.when they make mistakes.

Safe and HealthySafe and HealthyFriendshipsFriendships

Peers – people of similar age who Peers – people of similar age who share similar interests.share similar interests.

TYPES OF RELATIONSHIPS:TYPES OF RELATIONSHIPS:

Friendship-Friendship- a significant relationship a significant relationship between two people.between two people.

FriendshipsFriendships

• Platonic Friendship-Platonic Friendship- a friendship a friendship with a member of the opposite with a member of the opposite gender in which there is affection gender in which there is affection but the two people are not but the two people are not considered a couple.considered a couple.

FriendshipsFriendships

• Casual Friendship- Casual Friendship- between peers between peers who share something in common.who share something in common.

FriendshipsFriendships

• Close Friendship-Close Friendship- casual friends who casual friends who have strong emotional ties, share have strong emotional ties, share thoughts, feelings, and experiencesthoughts, feelings, and experiences

Problems with Problems with FriendshipsFriendships

• Envy and JealousyEnvy and Jealousy

• CrueltyCruelty

• CliquesCliques

Does WHS Have Does WHS Have “Cliques”?“Cliques”?

• Clique- a small circle of friends, Clique- a small circle of friends, usually with similar backgrounds or usually with similar backgrounds or tastes, who exclude people viewed tastes, who exclude people viewed as outsiders.as outsiders.

Problems with CliquesProblems with Cliques

• Prejudice- making assumptions or Prejudice- making assumptions or judgments about an individual judgments about an individual without really knowing him or her.without really knowing him or her.

• How do you judge a new person you just met? How do you judge a new person you just met?

• Stereotype- an exaggerated and over Stereotype- an exaggerated and over simplified belief about an entire simplified belief about an entire group of people, such as an ethnic or group of people, such as an ethnic or religious group or a gender.religious group or a gender.

Choosing FriendsChoosing Friends

• Be LoyalBe Loyal• Encourage Each OtherEncourage Each Other• Respect Each OtherRespect Each Other

Peer PressurePeer Pressure

• Peer Pressure- the influence that Peer Pressure- the influence that people your age may have on you.people your age may have on you.

• Examples- ? Examples- ? • Positive- “role model”Positive- “role model”

Peer PressurePeer Pressure

• Negative- Negative- • Harassment- persistently annoying Harassment- persistently annoying

othersothers• (Name calling, teasing, bullying)(Name calling, teasing, bullying)

Negative Peer PressureNegative Peer Pressure

• Manipulation- an indirect, dishonest way Manipulation- an indirect, dishonest way to control or influence others.to control or influence others.

• Mocking or teasingMocking or teasing• Using guilt tripsUsing guilt trips• Bargaining- making a deal to get your Bargaining- making a deal to get your

own wayown way• Using flatteryUsing flattery• Bribing- money or favorsBribing- money or favors• Making threatsMaking threats• Using blackmailUsing blackmail

DatingDating

• Teens begin to have feelings of Teens begin to have feelings of attraction to people they only attraction to people they only thought of as classmates or friends.thought of as classmates or friends.

• *develop social skills*develop social skills• *learn more about yourself*learn more about yourself• *discover new interests*discover new interests• *reaffirm your values*reaffirm your values• *begin thinking about your future*begin thinking about your future

DatingDating

• Infatuation- exaggerated feelings of Infatuation- exaggerated feelings of passion for another person. (do not passion for another person. (do not confuse with affection)confuse with affection)

• Affection – a feeling of fondness for Affection – a feeling of fondness for someone.someone.

Deciding to dateDeciding to date

• May not be readyMay not be ready• May have other interestsMay have other interests• May have other time commitmentsMay have other time commitments• May have family traditions or valuesMay have family traditions or values

• ““Everyone is UNIQUE”Everyone is UNIQUE”

WHO ?WHO ?Male or FemaleMale or Female

• Who asks the other person out?Who asks the other person out?• Who decides where to go?Who decides where to go?• Who drives or arranges forWho drives or arranges for• transportation?transportation?• Who pays?Who pays?• Who decides Who decides • when the date is over?when the date is over?• Curfew- a set time at Curfew- a set time at

which you which you • must be home at night.must be home at night.

Successful relationshipsSuccessful relationships

• 1. Establish your priorities- 1. Establish your priorities- • Think about your goals and set priorities Think about your goals and set priorities

that will help you reach them. Consider that will help you reach them. Consider YOUR values and those of your family YOUR values and those of your family such as respect, honesty, integrity and such as respect, honesty, integrity and morality.morality.

• Priorities- those goals, tasks and activities Priorities- those goals, tasks and activities that you judge to be more important than that you judge to be more important than others.others.

Violence in Dating Violence in Dating RelationshipsRelationships

• Dating Violence- a pattern of Dating Violence- a pattern of emotional, physical or sexual abuse emotional, physical or sexual abuse that occurs in a dating relationship.that occurs in a dating relationship.

• One person uses abuse to gain One person uses abuse to gain control.control.

Cycle of ViolenceCycle of Violence

• Tension Building Stage:Tension Building Stage:-picks fights-picks fights

-acts jealous and possessive-acts jealous and possessive-threatens-threatens-has unpredictable mood swings-has unpredictable mood swings-isolates victims from others-isolates victims from others

Cycle of Violence Cycle of Violence (Continued)(Continued)

• Violent Episode:Violent Episode:-uses force-uses force-may use a weapon-may use a weapon-causes serious injury-causes serious injury-may destroy possessions-may destroy possessions

Cycle of Violence Cycle of Violence (Continued)(Continued)

• Calm or “Honeymoon” Stage:Calm or “Honeymoon” Stage:-asks for forgiveness-asks for forgiveness-makes promises-makes promises-buys presents-buys presents-is affectionate-is affectionate-denies the abuse happened-denies the abuse happened

Warning Signs of AbuseWarning Signs of Abuse

• Your date:Your date:• Is jealous when you talk to othersIs jealous when you talk to others• Makes all the decisions and tries to Makes all the decisions and tries to

control what you docontrol what you do• Has a history of bad relationshipsHas a history of bad relationships• Isolate you from your friends and Isolate you from your friends and

familyfamily

Date RapeDate Rape

• Rape that occurs during a date.Rape that occurs during a date.

Ending the AbuseEnding the Abuse

• Admit the abuse existsAdmit the abuse exists• Realize that you are not to blame for Realize that you are not to blame for

the abuse and that you cannot the abuse and that you cannot change how your abuser behaveschange how your abuser behaves

• You don’t have to deal with the You don’t have to deal with the problem on your own, seek the problem on your own, seek the support of family and friends.support of family and friends.

ASSIGNMENTASSIGNMENT

• Describe the “perfect date”. Describe the “perfect date”. • Include all components of dating Include all components of dating

that were discussed in the previous that were discussed in the previous notes. notes.

• (This is a quiz grade)(This is a quiz grade)