The Accidental Legacy - Chapter 01

7/28/2019 The Accidental Legacy - Chapter 01

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See this handsome fella?

Hes not our founder.

Honestly, I havent got a clue who he is. Obviously I created him for somethingor other in this (otherwise empty) neighborhood. But he doesnt exist any

more, so I guess Ill never know. There are about two dozen pics of him, andnone of them tell me his story.

Take a good look, because its the last time you, I, or anyone else will see him.

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...almost.

*ahem* Sorry, I need a moment.

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Where were we? Ah, yes... thischap is our founder. Say hi to all the nicereaders!

Hi.

Thats it? No charming intro? No wondering why youre standing in an empty

field?

You didnt ask for that. You said to say hi, so I did. If you wanted more, youshould have asked for it.

Well, Im asking now. Arent you going to yell at me for putting you in a Legacy?Living on the lawn? Complaining about the lack of a house and all that?

Nope.

Aw, come on. Not even a little?

Um, hello? With a name like mine, I should be glad to be ALIVE.

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I suppose thats true. Ladies and gentlemen, meet Mr. Test Dumy. Yes, I knowits spelled wrong. Yes, that was intentional. Yes, there was a spelling failinvolved, and no, the fail was not mine. But his name is a reference to an eventthat exactly three people in the world know about, and the other two dontplay The Sims so they will never read this. And thats his name because I had no

idea this Legacy would ever travel outside of my computer.

Im not really sure why I started this family. Obviously to test something. I dontthink I meant it to go for more than a few days. But they charmed me. Againstall odds, they have personality. I just keep coming back here when my otherSims just arent interesting. I did say this Legacy was accidental, didnt I?

Needless to say, this Legacy will not be scored. Seriously, if I even make it toGeneration Three*, that will be an accomplishment. Ive started probablydozens of Legacies; finished exactly zero.

*As of this writing, Generation Three is currently entering teenagerdom. What?Dont give me that look. I play slowly. And write even more slowly.

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Test Dumy here is an awfully shy Family Sim, who would like nothing more thanto have six grandchildren.

Or was it reaching his Golden Anniversary? I cant remember now, and I am sonot going to go check*. I know for a fact its not RAISE 20 FRIKKIN PUPPIESOR KITTENS because he never wouldve lived past day one and Id be in jail forSimicide. Pretty sure its the grandkids.

As you can see, his possessions are a tad... meager. Well, its a LEGACY, forheavens sake! What did you expect, a palace? Hes a Family Sim because I didntwant to hear all that want panel spam about paintings when we dont havewalls with winter coming on. Darn those needy Fortune Sims.

...Or at least thats what I tell myself now. In reality, I have absolutely no ideawhy hes a Family Sim. Just like I have no idea why he exists.

*Because about the only time I use Windoze is to play The Sims, so Im writingthis in Linux. Going to check requires a full reboot, and that doesnt even counthow long the game takes to load all of my 289462938473 GB of customcontent.

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Or maybe it was Meeting Someone New in the welcome wagon.

Hey, you! No swooning over my founder; I know for a fact that all three of youare playable and live over in Bluewater. Send them off, Test!

Aw, but I likeher!

No you dont. And wed like to keep it that way. Those Maxis-mades are nothingbut trouble, and shes ineligible for marriage anyway. And youre not supposedto have a personality. Youre a test dum(m)y, remember?

Yeah, but I do have a personality! Thats why youre still playing me.Remember?

...Shut up.

Look, I promise well find someone better downtown *crosses fingers*. Justsend them off like a good Sim and lets call a taxi.

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Come on, you know Im shy. Why are you making me go downtown? And thengo talk to people?

Um, because I can see that big, fat Fall In Love clogging up your want panel.Hate to break it to ya, but that usually involves talking to people. Also, becausewe need to get this Legacy show on the road. Chop chop!

This means Im gonna have to talk to someone, doesnt it?

Affirmative. Now go check out the local ladies.

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Still no. And she doesnt look any better from the back side.

All Sims look the SAME from the back side. And whats with the compulsivelycleaning everyones plates? Isnt that the waitresss job?

Ten neat points, nyatch. You assigned em.

*grumble* What about your eight Nice points? I dont see thoseshiningthrough.

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I got a job in Education.

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We chatted.

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Made friends.

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Fell in love.

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Took a shower.

Ack!Hidethathidethathidethathidethathidethatshysimgoingintoaspirationfailure--

Relax, youre censored. But seriously, Professor Binns class is more exciting

than the way youre telling the story. Im taking back over the storytellingduties now before everyone leaves.

--hidethathidethathidethathidethathidethathidethat...

Moving on.

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Robin? Um, I, uh, have something Id like for you to, um... that is, I...

You okay, sweetie?

Well what I mean is... I really like you, and I thought maybe youd like...

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Maybeyoudlikeasparklyshinefromme?

Oh, Test! Do you mean what I think you mean?

That depends entirely on what you think he means, Robin.

Shut it, Alex. Youre spoiling the mood.

I should point out that Robin does not have nearly so many Nice points as Testdoes.

ALEX! BEAT IT!

*sigh* Nobody wants me around.

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Robin: Yes!

Test: Yes!

Me: YES!!!

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Babies.

Dude. PATIENCE. You want babies, then lets get this show on the road. Yknow,with the marrying thing. And since youre shy, I know you wont be rolling thewant for a wedding party which is good, because its less work for me.

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*ahem* Mawwidge! Mawwidge ith what bwingth uth togewwah today!Mawwidge: That bwethed awaingement, That dweam wiffim a dweam, wenwuv, twoo wuv, wiw fowwow you fowewwew...

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And thats the story of how we got here.

Now everyone clear out! *cracks knuckles* Build Mode, lets dance.

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And heres the new house! Such as it is.

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Although really, Robin spends most of her time doing this.

...

Despite that, shes still really bad at it.

(As an aside, notice how grouchy she looks, even when dancing. As opposed toher all-smiles-all-the-time husband.)

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Woo Hoo! Were makin some PROGRESS up in here! Come on, hurry it up; thisLegacy aint gonna grow itself!

Silly Alex, WooHoo happened earlier. This is the result.

Wow, I didnt know Sims knew about that connection!

I do. But Im not at work! Were gonna go broke and starve to death!

Yet, somehow, theres enough money in the bank to afford wallpaper andcarpets. Stop worrying; I wont let anything bad happen to you.

Why should I believe you?

Because, O Cranky Miss Crankypants, as of this writing, the Legacy is movinginto Generation Three, with EIGHT Sims in the house and ALL EIGHT areplatinum and we have $80 grand in the bank. Im good at game. Now get back inbed before you pass out on the floor!

I should probably also point out that, despite her complaints about missingwork, Robin has had the easiest pregnancy ever. I still havent seen her hunchedover the toilet even once.

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Although its not without a few bumps along the way. Erm, other than babybumps, I mean.

So then she says frying pans are best used for food. But I says to her, I says...um, sweetie? Robin, are you listening?

Zzzzzzzz...

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Im home! And Im a Family Sim! And I got some money! Everybody come giveme BIG hugs!

Test, your family currently consists of you, your pregnant wife, and the gnome Ibought to shut her up. I dont think the gnome can give you a hug, and Robin isasleep. In her food. Again. Dont wake her; shes all in a tizzy today. Because shehad to miss work. Again. Be glad youve been gone; I had to put up with her allday.

But I brought home money! Doesnt that count for something?

Yeah. It counts for the Feed the Baby fund.

Yay! Do you think the baby will want a hug?

Probably. But there are a few things that need to happen first... like BIRTH,maybe. Also, arent you supposed to be super shy? This does not look shy to me.

I like to be unpredictable, nyatch.

Just get inside, you. And remember what I said about not waking Robin.

Gotcha. Stealth mode.

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Um, shoo flee?

Tsk, tsk. Call yourself a Fortune Sim, Robin? Theres an unfleeced money treebehind you! For shame!

Im a Fortune Sim who hasnt been to work in two days! My aspiration is barely

above red!

Oh. Right.

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AND I HAVE MORE URGENT CONCERNS RIGHT NOW!

Test, you might want to get in here right away. Like immediately right awaycome running in here right now.

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Ack! Is it that time already?

Yep. Looks like.

What do I do?

Nothing.

Nothing at all!?

Nope. Come on, youre a Family Sim -- youre supposed to know these things.Just stand back and give her room to spin the kid out of her Plumbbob.

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The arrival of little Damien has necessitated a slight expansion to the LegacyEstate.

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After all, the kid needs a place to sleep, too. But look! We have wallpaper ANDfloors this time! The Dumys are moving up in the world!

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Aww, whos Daddys little baby? You are! Yes you are!

Goo?

Ka-Ching, +500 aspiration! Family Sims are so easy to take care of once the kidsstart popping out.

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Cheap showers, on the other hand, are not.

Stupid *@$ shower! Why wont you !@*#($? work!?

Language, Test! Damien might hear you!

I DONT #&*@(*#$ CARE RIGHT NOW!

Yeesh, who got your plumbbob all in a bunch?

YOU DID, FOR NOT GETTING ME A BETTER %@&!^# SHOWER!

Oh dear, look at the time! Id better go check up on Robin!

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Of course, time moved on (as it has a tendency to do), and soon it was theaforementioned little Damiens birthday!

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Rawr! Someone tell that foxy redhead she can call me anytime!

Um, Test? That foxy redhead is your WIFE.

Doesnt mean she cant call me!

You feeling all right lately?

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Oh hi, Damien! Watcha doin?

Pwaying!

Cant be sanitary to play in a toilet...

Nuh-uh! Dunno no samiterry! Its McEwigummys Pool! Im fishing!

Daww. Lemme know if you catch anything, okay, kid?

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Well, not really a birthday *party* per se, since nobody spun up a want for one.But a birthday nonetheless! Yes, Damien is about to childify!

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And of course, whats the first thing he does upon becoming a full-fledgedchild? You guessed it.

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YEEE-HAAAAAAA!

I swear, every time I turn around, somebody in this family is dancing. And I amcompletely okay with that.

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No, really. I mean it!

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You will notice I did notsay that every time I turn around someone in this familyis dancing well. A little more work on the balance, there, Test. Someday youllbe able to spin all the way around without falling!

Argh! Dont you have anything better to do than follow us around mocking usall day?

No. Thats pretty much how a Legacy works. If you hadnt noticed by now.

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Aw, was the Collaborator being mean to you again, Test, baby?

Yes, Robin, sweetie. But Ill survive.

Are you sure, snookums? Maybe you need some mouth-to-mouth.

Gag me. Snookums? Really?

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AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Now, where can that fire extinguisher have got to?

Oh, come on. If you cant find the extinguisher, you could at least LEAVE THEROOM. We do have a fire alarm, so the departments on their way.

WERE ALL GONNA DIE!

Im sure I left it somewhere over here... maybe its behind the fridge?

Cripes! One of you, DO SOMETHING.

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Finally. But shouldnt the fire department be here doing that? Seriously, whereare they?

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Of course, the moment the fire is out, everyone starts dancing again. Yep.Thats how this family rolls.

Although, Id be careful if I were you, Robin. Dont shake that thing too hard,now.

Wait, why?

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Ooh, look! A promotion! Its been a while.

Huh. That couldnt have anything to do with NEVER GOING TO WORK ONACCOUNT OF ALWAYS BEING PREGNANT, could it?

Oh, be quiet and go take a shower.

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Psh. Whatever. Im still fabulous.

And still in need of a shower.

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Wahhhh! I got fired!

Gah, Im sorry! Poor girl, shes never gonna make it at this rate. But cheer up, itssnowing now! And snow is pretty!

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Hey, guess what? Its birthday time again! Wow, that went fast! For you, maybe.Notice how excited Damien looks. About as excited as I feel about having to runa pair of toddlers through walking, talking, and pottying.

What? Pottying is totally a word!

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And first up to the plate is Birch! Wearing a blue tuxedo. Seriously, Maxis?

Hmm, Birch, you seem to have a bad case of Confettiitis. That cant be a goodsign have to ask the doctor about that.

Colors! Wanna be friends?

Uh oh. Kids already showing some Popularity. Could be a sign.

Look! Hes already trying to talk goo goo gah to you too, little buddy! Robin,did you hear that!?

No, Test, dear, I was too busy spinning your other spawn into toddlerhood overhere to notice.

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And of course, its back to work for Robin. As soon as she finds the Adventurercareer track again.

I still hate you.

Ive heard. Well, did you find it this time?

Yes. Finally. Its hasnt shown up for the last week. And NOTHING had betterget in the way this time!

Given the track record, I cant make any promises.

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The Accidental Legacy - Chapter 01