The Goals of Parenting

Ephesians 6:4

Ephesians 6:4 And you, fathers, do not

provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.

1. Do not provoke your children to wrath

2. Bring them up (in the training and admonition of the Lord)

Define: Provoke• (Parorgizo)

– para – beside, in the vicinity of– orgizo – to provoke or enrage (passively,

to become exasperated, be angry).• Definition: to enrage; to make angry• Clearly, it is wrong for a parent

(father) to act in such a way as to provoke or instigate anger in his child.

• Note: This does not indicate that a child’s anger at being disciplined is an instance of provocation.

Examples of Provocation• Physical or

verbal abuse.• Ridicule.• Unreasonable

expectations.• Selfish choices.• Favoritism

among siblings (Jacob).

• Indifference.

• Unwilling-ness to listen.

• Loss of temper.

• Denial of God’s will (as contrasted to bringing your child up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord).

Other Definitions• “Bring them up” - to rear

up to maturity, to train or cherish.• “Nurture” - tutorage, i.e. education

or training; by implication, disciplinary correction: -- chastening, chastisement, instruction, nurture.

• “Admonition” - calling attention to, i.e. (by implication) mild rebuke or warning

• “of the Lord” – Obviously the admonition and training is in accord with the Lord’s will, not man’s.

Deuteronomy 11:18-23Therefore you shall lay up these words of

mine in your heart and in your soul, and bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. 19 You shall teach them to your children, speaking of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up. 20 And you shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates, 21 that your days and the days of your children may be multi-plied in the land of which the LORD swore to your fathers to give them, like the days of the heavens above the earth. 22 For if you carefully keep all these commandments which I command you to do-to love the LORD your God, to walk in all His ways, and to hold fast to Him- 23 then the LORD will drive out all these nations from before you, and you will dispossess greater and mightier nations than yourselves.

Joshua 24:14-15“Now therefore, fear the LORD,

serve Him in sincerity and in truth, and put away the gods which your fathers served on the other side of the River and in Egypt. Serve the LORD! 15 And if it seems evil to you to serve the LORD, choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you dwell. But as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.”

Psalm 78:5-8For He established a testimony in

Jacob, And appointed a law in Israel, Which He commanded our fathers, That they should make them known to their children; 6 That the generation to come might know them, The children who would be born, That they may arise and declare them to their children, 7 That they may set their hope in God, And not forget the works of God, But keep His commandments; 8 And may not be like their fathers, A stubborn and rebellious generation, A generation that did not set its heart aright, And whose spirit was not faithful to God.

Suggestions for Training• Respect for

authority.• Especially, respect

for God, Bible, church, worship.

• Honesty, Kindness, Consideration.

• Modesty; Dangers of drink, drugs, extra-marital sex, other moral sins.

• To see the dangers in the “little sins”

• Lavish generous praise on the good things done.

• Enable and support a child to stand against peer and societal pressures

Proverbs 22:6Train up a child in the way he

should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.

2 Timothy 3:15But you must continue in the

things which you have learned and been assured of, knowing from whom you have learned them, 15 and that from childhood you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.

Taught by grandmother Lois and mother Eunice.

Conclusion“Jesus said, ‘Seek ye first the

kingdom of God and his righteousness.’ Make that the cornerstone of the foundation in the life of your children. Let the words of Christ not only be your goal for yourself and for the children, but help the children to make those same words their objective in life also.”

Leslie Diestelkamp (April 6, 1978, Truth Magazine)