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Tips to Become a Successful
Presented by Verenice Castillo, Key Spouse Mentor 2013 AFI Air Force Spouse of the Year Military Spouse Advocacy Network Founder
Key Spouses and Key Spouse Mentors
Thank you for your dedication and support!
Overview
- Special message from Mrs. Betty Welsh, Air Force Chief of Staff Spouse and Mrs. Athena Cody, Chief Master Sgt of the Air Force Spouse.
- You have been assigned as a Key Spouse, what is next?
- Formula for a successful Key Spouse Team
- What to do when Key Spouses do not have support
- Ideas that help promote Key Spouses
- Key Spouses and the need for more training
Special message from Mrs. Betty Welsh, Air Force Chief of Staff Spouse and Mrs. Athena Cody, Chief Master Sgt of the Air Force Spouse.
You have been assigned as a Key Spouse, what is next? § Schedule an appointment to meet with the Commander and Key Spouse Mentor. Talk about your ideas and initiatives and ask them about their expectations. What is it that the Commander wants to accomplish at the squadron?
§ If you don’t know the way the squadron works, don’t hesitate to meet with other leaders at the squadron and learn about it. If you know the way it runs, but feel that the communication process between the squadron and the Key Spouses is not working, don’t hesitate to meet with your Mentor, Commander, and/or Shirt and provide a solution to the problem. The more the squadron gets to learn about how the program works and the things you are trying to accomplish, the more successful you will be!
§ If you don’t know the needs at your squadron, don’t hesitate to do your own research. Plan a spouses get-together and bring a survey. Find out what is it that spouses want to see or would like to do. What about groups where spouses can get together once a month and do something they are interested on. Remember, it is about empowering and educating spouses and not just to socialize. For example, create an educational group; “Self-Improvement” and invite spouses to sign up and enjoy a monthly training class. This is where you can invite AFRC, Med Group, Family Advocacy and others to teach an informative and educational training.
Formula for a successful Key Spouse Team Sq/CC, First Sgt (Shirt), Key Spouse Mentor, and unit Key Spouses (KS)
§ Commanders’ support is NEEDED- If your commander does not support the program, meet with him/her and explain the benefits of the program, address your desire to help the squadron’s families, and try to guide him/her on how to support YOU. In this situations, it is helpful to take the lead. § First Sgt (Shirt)- Once you receive the support from the commander, it is easier to have the Shirt’s support. Do not be afraid or intimidated to ask the Shirt for assistance and request information… remember, you were assigned by the commander as a representative of the squadron, you are part of the team! § Mentor Involvement- A mentor should be involved, committed, and be able to guide the Key Spouse Team. A Mentor is ALSO a Key Spouse, not just a Mentor. If you want participation and dedication from Key Spouses, you got to lead by example. § Key Spouses- You are the first emotional responders! Your dedication and energy is what makes a difference. Your respect towards the program and those that you assist is what earns the trust of others.
What to do when Key Spouses do not have support Do not get discouraged! Do not allow a NO for answer stop you, use it
as your challenge to keep pushing and accomplish your mission!
§ If you do not have a Key Spouse Mentor, make an appointment with the Commander and nominate/volunteer yourself to take the role. NOT just the Commander spouses can be Mentors.
§ Bring to your meetings the concerns that you and many other spouses have, BUT do not forget to bring the ideas and solutions to fix and improve the support system. Is not a good idea to only bring the concerns, because the Commander, Shirt, and/or your Mentor may perceive it as complaining.
§ Highly visible around base, volunteer to support group and base events. Talk to your Key Spouse Coordinator and express your interest to promote the Key Spouse program beyond your squadron. I am not saying help others outside your squadron, but help promote and educate spouses on the Key Spouse Program.
§ Be persistent! Giving up will only show others that you were never serious about it.
Ideas that help promote Key Spouses
Attend Commander’s Calls and talk about the reason why this program is important… this is your opportunity to motivate and start earning the airmen’s trust.
The MOST important and first thing you need to work on is to earn the airmen’s trust, without their trust, you will not be allowed to reach out to their families. This is why gossiping and breach of confidentiality should NOT be tolerated… this behavior kills the good reputation of the program.
Do you have a Key Spouse Banner? Once you volunteer to support base-wide events, don’t forget to bring your table, banner, fliers, and feedback/info sheet.
Ideas that help promote Key Spouse Teams What about a Key Spouse Board? This is a great tool to advertise events, resources, and much more. Do not forget to include the pictures of all Key Spouses, it is great for spouses and airmen to recognize your face. It is ideal to place your board next to the First Sgt’s board, more people get to see it!
Recognizing Key Spouses for their dedication and effort is a MUST. If your squadron and/or installation are not recognizing Key Spouses, take the lead and propose it!
Do you have a facebook page? This is a great way to inform spouses, BUT be careful because you don’t want this page to turn into a venting and gossiping page, but DO allow others to send you private messages. Share articles, resources, events at the squadron and around the base, agencies, and much more.
Ideas that help promote Key Spouse Teams Many times, family events are more successful than spouses ONLY events.
Ideas that help promote Key Spouse Teams More than just socials… food drives, care packages, Hearts Apart dinners,
support the Holiday spirit, Individual groups, and much more
Key Spouses and the need for more training
Do not miss the quarterly or monthly training that your Key Spouse Coordinator offers. Some of these trainings are mandatory and will provide you more knowledge. If you are interested in certain topics, talk to your Mentor and propose it to your Key Spouse Coordinator.
Final Thought
Key Spouse Mentors,
If for any reason you can not dedicate time to the program, please do not feel obligated to take the role just because your spouse is the Commander. It is better to be honest and allow someone else that is ready to take your role and do great things for spouses and their families. Let’s keep creating opportunities for other spouses.
Key Spouses,
You are the motor that keeps this program moving… do not stop! Do not be afraid to be a leader, to take a mentor role, and to address concerns. You are an advocate and the voice of many spouses, they are counting on you to provide them or improve their support system. Keep up the GREAT work!
For questions and assistance Contact your Key Spouse Coordinator for additional assistance
Please feel free to contact me if you have any questions, ideas, or you need a little bit of encouragement.
AF Key Spouses Network- Facebook Page
Military Spouse Advocacy Network (MSAN) [email protected] Military Spouse Advocacy Network- Facebook Page Military Spouse Advocacy Network.org
