IIInnnssspppiiirrreee

IIIssssssuuueee ###111666 FFFeeebbbrrruuuaaarrryyy 222000111333

TTTooo LLLooovvveee AAAgggaaaiiinnn MMMiiinnniiissstttrrriiieeesss

CCoonntteenntt OOccttoobbeerr 22001122

Alone Again 4

Getting the Spark Back 6

Between a Rock and More Character 8

Creating an Arsenal 10

Choosing a Grateful Heart 12 The Waiting 14

CCrreeddiittss

Founder & Editor Kimberly Borst Writers Beverly Huffman Kimberly Borst Sarah Williamson Mary Corey Briel Borst

Editing Alan Porter

Photography Nancy Frost (Unnamed with creative commons limited license) Design Kimberly Borst

Copyright © To Love Again

Ministries 2012, Photos © very

TToo LLoovvee AAggaaiinn MMiinniissttrriieess PPiicckk ooff tthhee mmoonntthh

This month we are highlighting a book called

The Sacred Romance

This is an excellent explanation of the amazing plan of God to capture the heart of mankind. It unravels the tail of God’s heart for

each of us through the bible. This is a great book. If you haven’t read it check it out.

and love. Yes, love. There is much to be thankful for even in solitude. You have a heavenly Father who loves you.

I know, I know, you want a man with

skin to love and adore you. You want someone to care. You want hugs and kisses. Your heart longs to see romantic glances gliding across the room. But, what would that relationship mean if you did not have a foundation of love that only God can give you?

Relationships can be challenging.

Good relationships included. They take work. Life is not always a bouquet of roses with a resounding “Honey, I love you.” There is dirty laundry to deal with, literally and emotionally. “Honey” isn’t always in that stargazed frame of mind. Sometimes “Honey” just wants to be left alone when you really need a tender touch. What then?

When you decide to lean heavily, r-e-

a-l heavily, on the fact that God, who is Love, loves you unconditionally, life will become much more bearable and even pleasurable. It will be filled with the fragrance of love even when life seems less than tolerable. He will never leave you alone.

Alone Again Beverly Huffman

February - the month of love…alone.

Valentine’s Day flashes before your face. It’s everywhere! There are suggestive cards, beautiful flowers, special gifts, rich chocolate that is lovingly packaged, and wonderful dinners for two. You may wonder if anyone will even notice you exist. This can be a month of excitement or dread.

Some women will be swooped off of their

emotional feet and treated like queens. They will delight in candlelight evenings and be surprised with romantic gifts. Yet, there are those who will be alone again.

Whether you have never been courted or

find yourself alone in a new season of life, February can be a time of reflection, peace

Consider finding ways to bring your

heavenly Father pleasure, not just one month a year, but daily. As you learn to find joy in intimacy with God, loving “Honey” or receiving love from “Honey” will become easier. Waiting for the right one to fall in love with can be enjoyable.

Love is a two-way street. Loving and

being loved. Learning about true love from Love Himself is a wonderful way to spend this month.

As a believer in Christ, faith is

important, real important. Hope for a better year is vital. And then there is love. God says these three things are real: Faith, Hope, and Love. But, He points out that love is the greatest. (1 Corinthians 13:13) Learn to bring God pleasure and see what special gifts He brings into your day! You will never be alone again!

Whisper “I love you” in his ear. Tell him something about you he never knew.

A candle-lit dinner for two can be fun,

while the kids have pizza somewhere else (or an early dinner depending on age.) Pick up a new nighty or invade his shower.

A little thought and time can re-energize

a long term relationship. Who knows, maybe he’ll even get in on the fun. It doesn’t take much to give your husband a little extra attention and before you know it sparks and fireworks are going off.

Getting the Spark Back Kimberly Borst

The unexpected can breathe new life into

a relationship. Even if a date isn’t on the horizon, you can spice things up a bit by taking your hubby off guard. Sparks are created by intentional actions.

Touch has amazing power in a marriage

relationship. Give him a surprise backrub. Meet him at the door with a real kiss. Next time you go somewhere hold his hand. Snuggle up to hubby on the couch when the TV goes on. Play footsies at the table. Have fun reconnecting.

Words may or may not be his thing, but

an unexpected love note or letter of appreciation could make his day.

The Best Chocolate Cake Ever

1 box chocolate cake mix 1 (5.9 oz.) box instant chocolate pudding 2 cups milk 2 eggs 1 (12 oz.) package mini, simi sweet chocolate chips Combine all ingredients and mix by hand. Pour batter into 2 greased 9” cake pans. Bake at 350 for 50 min. or until the cake springs back when pressed on then remove. Cool for 30 min.

Cream Cheese Frosting 2 - 8 oz. Packages of cream cheese 1 cup sugar ¼ cup sour cream Beat all ingredients thoroughly and frost cooled cake.

Between a Rock and More Character

Sarah Williamson

“So how’s married life?” I started to

get this question everywhere I went after being married for a short amount of time. It’s completely understandable considering I had recently had a very large wedding. I know people were trying to by nice, but I started to dread that question. It wasn’t because I was unhappy with my choice; Jordan is my very best friend in the world, and there is no one else I could ever imagine spending the rest of my life with. I just didn’t know how to answer the question. We had a very beautiful wedding and an amazing honeymoon in Florida, but five weeks after returning from our vacation I became very sick. I didn’t become sick in the sense that I had the stomach flu or in the sense that I had a very bad cold. I was in unimaginable pain and no one could figure out why. I was in and out of the hospital, and all the doctors could do was send me home doped up on morphine and recommend I see another specialist. This wouldn’t have been such a big deal if it would have happened five years into my marriage, but five weeks? Seriously God? Every time I heard “how are

things going?” I inwardly cringed a little because how do you politely say “Well, at the moment things suck; thanks so much for asking though!”

I don’t think I have ever felt more

down trodden. I was so sick I couldn’t work. All I did was lie on the couch on pain meds and stare at the TV. It was utterly depressing. Jordan and I started to fight a lot about almost everything. I take responsibility for that considering I was feeling so unworthy of his love at this point that I didn’t want to hear all of the ‘’I love you,” and the “I’ll be by your side the whole time.” I just wanted him to confirm what I felt was true; that maybe he should have married someone else, that it wasn’t fair that he went from newlywed to caretaker. I don’t care what anyone says, it is way harder to be a caretaker than it is to be sick (no matter how sick you are). I will always be grateful to Jordan for filling this position without hesitation or limits.

I look back on this and think why?

Our human nature seems to enjoy asking that question the most out of all the others. I came across James 1:1-4 a couple months back and

slowly all the puzzle pieces formed a greater picture that I had been unable to

see at the time. “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds because you know that testing your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” The

first thing this verse reminded me of was when I was a little girl and my parents had me do chores or clean my room I would always whine and say “I don’t wanna.” To which my dad would jokingly responded “suck it up, it builds character.” He was truly only half kidding, but in a way I thought: “I wonder if God thinks this every once in awhile.” It sounds funny, but the reason I had to do chores when I was younger was to learn the reward of hard work. The trials that we go through aren’t just some random road block that God said, “Well, here’s this pointless hardship - enjoy.” If nothing else, the things that we go through are specific lessons we need to learn about who we really are when the storm comes.

As much as I could sit here and whine

and complain about the fact that my life has been difficult at times, the amount of blessings that have come out of it have been worth every treacherous minute. Because of what I went through, Jordan and I are so much stronger. We have been through more in our two years of marriage than I think most people that have been married for ten years have been through. Because of that we have a deeper understanding of each other, we

work together better as a team, and when difficult things come our way - we don’t panic, we hold hands and tackle it together. Imagine trying to give advice, never having had some dark times here or there! Having a hard time imagining that? That’s because it’s hard to give good advice when we haven’t been through anything difficult. Any wisdom I may have is based on the fact that I have regrets, I have some things I would like a “do over” on, I have experienced loss at its most profound, and I have had an array of skeletons in my closet. We want all this wisdom and profound insight on life which is a great thing to want, but in order to get to that enlightened place we have to learn from the mistakes of others and learn from our hardships and difficult times. I can tell you first hand that it is such a blessing to be able to help someone that is going through something that you have already been through. If nothing else this is reward enough for me.

We can rejoice, too, when we run into

problems and trials, for we know that they

help us develop endurance. 4 And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. 5 And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love. Romans 5:3-5 (NLT)

Creating an Arsenal Kimberly Borst

concordance and the laptops. On the internet there are several good bible websites to do topical and word searches.

Scripture Keys is a good topical

reference (scripturekeys.com). Their only down side is that everything is in King James. It’s not a bad version, but it’s just a little hard for kids to understand, so we also usually look up the reference in our own bible.

Bible Gateway is a good reference for

word and topical searches (biblegateway.com). You can change versions easily, and quickly find every use of a word.

The kids chose two or three verses to

memorize and add to their arsenal. They wrote the topic at the top of their page. Then, they added verses into their journals in shapes, big or small and made them their own. I had them speak their verses over themselves as well. For a week or two we memorized and spoke our verses.

When they face situations where they

have a related emotion or lie, they will learn to quote the word and wield their sword. Every couple for weeks we will chose a new topic to tackle. In the end they will know more from the word of God and how to use it.

About a month ago the Lord gave me a

wonderful idea about how to turn pocket journals into arsenals with my kids. We started with pocket size

journals. On the first page I wrote, 2 Corinthian 10:4 (NKJV) “For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds.” On the second page I

had the kids write our family verse. On page three they chose a life verse and wrote it in. A life verse should make a statement about the kind of person they want to be and/or what they want to accomplish. The rest of the journal will be filled with bible verses they can use as spiritual weapons to defeat the enemy of their souls and the lies that he wields.

Each child chose a topic for their first

set of weapons. I told them to pick something they struggle with such as fear, anger, or rejection. Once they chose a topic, we pulled out the

Example:

Fear& God’s love

1 John 4:18 Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love. 2 Timothy 1:7 For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline. Isaiah 41:10 Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.

CChhoooossiinngg aa GGrraatteeffuull HHeeaarrtt MMaarryy CCoorreeyy

Back to the TV program; they explained

gratitude journaling that you do in the morning. You start with just 5 simple things that you are grateful for. There is nothing too small, for example; I am grateful for my warm PJ’s! (Those who know me know I live in them). I am grateful for the blue sky and a big cup of hot chocolate on a cold winter’s morning, or chocolate in any form. You may find that you can come up with 50 things for your list. The huge things count too, such as surviving cancer, or a great loss. I am very grateful for my children’s and my grandchildren’s precious little lives. Lives that could have been lost at birth when they just didn’t breath well on their own, or by an unforeseen accident. Even for my own life I am grateful. There were many times where without thinking I just did a really dumb thing that could have been detrimental to my life. But for the grace of God and by the hair of my chiny, chin, chin I was spared.

Here is my resolution - to try to write

no less than 5 positive things I am grateful for, whether great or small, to replace all the negativity and to believe that I do have worth. I also purpose to get my life in order by making very hard, life changing decisions that I tend

As January comes to a close, to be

forgotten for another year, I ponder the thoughts of my New Year’s resolutions. I had never made any resolutions at the New Year before. I always felt that they were made to be broken. I believe there has to be a true life change that can work for us, something that is so rewarding that we love doing it, for the rest of our lives.

I was watching an encouraging program

on TV. The topic was self-esteem. This is an area I have always had trouble with. It seems too often my thoughts go to how unhappy I am, how I hate my life, how I am a total failure, how my life has been for nothing and how I dwell on the past. You get the picture (much self loathing.) These thoughts set the mood for my entire day. This is a self-taught and very destructive way to live.

to avoid. These decisions actually will make my life, and the lives of those who feel the responsibility to care for me, hard, life changing decisions that I tend to avoid. These decisions actually will make my life, and the lives of those who feel the responsibility to care for me, easier. Hardest of all (I hate to read) I will strive to read some self-help materials and immerse myself in the word of God, as God never tears us down but encourages and lifts us up. Praise the Lord, my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name. Praise the Lord, my soul, and forget not all his benefits—who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s. Psalm 103 : 1-5

Lachlan Hardy

garage. On his face was a brilliant smile but when he saw her with the bike by her side, his face dropped. Without saying anything he turned and went around back. When he came back, in his hands was the brand new pink bike, pompoms and everything. And with a sad smile he said, “If only you had waited.”

Too many times we find ourselves

saying “Well, it’s better than nothing.” Or “It’ll do.” We compromise. Even when the Lord says, “Wait, I want the best for you.” Why do we do this? I believe that more than anything we grow tired of waiting - waiting for that break through, waiting for “the one”, or waiting for that perfect opportunity.

I have been struggling with this for a

while now. I need that break through, but God hasn’t given it to me yet. So many times I have thought of giving up, for a season in my life I used pain as a release. How do we ever get to that point where we even consider the compromise? I don’t have that answer, but I can tell you that while you are in that time of waiting, the most important thing is to stay strong.

My friend got this great idea to write

down different things that God had done in her life, promises that he had

The Waiting Briel Borst

I recently heard a great analogy that

my youth pastor’s wife, Beth Petillo used. It was about a little girl. She desperately wanted this pink bike; you know the one with the horn and the pompoms, a basket on the front, and no training wheels. All the other girls in the neighbor had one, so one day out shopping with her dad they came across this very bike. “Look daddy! There it is!” she squealed. Her father then looked at the price tag, “Oh, well dear that is a little more than we can afford, maybe next time.” Although disappointed, she resolved to wait. The days went by and one day she decided to go outside to play. As she looked around she noticed all the other girls playing on their pink bikes. She tried to ignore it, but she went inside distraught. The next day she went out and again she was distracted by the other girls laughing and having fun riding on their bikes. She was about to go inside when she saw a garage sale down the street. Beyond all hope there stood a bike. She went to look at it, and although it was yellow and had some wear and tear she realized she could afford it herself! So she ran home grabbed her penny bank and bought the bike. She rode it to her drive way and saw her dad come out of the

To Love again

Ministries

If you have a question about life, go to our website and ask. Whatever your situation,

practical, relational, or spiritual we will prayerfully answer your

question. Toloveagainministries.org

fulfilled. Then she made a box and put all of them in there. Then she could open that promise box whenever she needed some uplifting.

John 14:27 say’s “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” Inspiring, is it not? If we

can only be patient and wait, He will provide. He has not forgotten us. Remember who He is, He is a good God and will not fail us. Things may not happen in our preferred timing, or the way we think they will, but He has the best in store for us.

January’s issue featured an article by Sarah Williamson giving hair care tips that was cut short. Here are those tips in full: Random tip: If you are thinking of venturing out into the product world, make sure you are shopping somewhere that allows you to return a product if you find you don’t like it or it doesn’t work with your hair. It is the worst when you buy a product, use it once or twice, and then discover you can’t return it because of company policy. Most high end salons are surprisingly good with returns, and the last time I was in Beauty Brands the lady told me that if I didn’t like it to bring it back!