You said it!

Richard Ponton

FETC 2006

• The past is really almost as much a work of the imagination as the Future. ~Jessamyn West

• If you put tomfoolery into a computer, nothing comes out of it but tomfoolery. But this tomfoolery, having passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow enobled and no-one dares criticize it." Pierre Gallois.

• Computer dating is fine, if you're a computer." Rita May Brown.

• "Why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as well as prohibition did, in five years Americans would be the smartest people on Earth."- Will Rogers

• "If you do not like the past, change it." William L. Burton

• The past actually happened but history is only what someone wrote down.  ~A. Whitney Brown, The Big Picture

• You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test. -- George W. Bush (on Education reform, Feb 21, 2001)

• History:  gossip well told.  ~Elbert Hubbard, The Roycroft Dictionary

• History is philosophy teaching by examples.  ~Thucydides, The History of the Peloponnesian War

You said it!

Richard Ponton

FETC 2006

• History is a mighty dramos, enacted upon the theatre of times, with suns for lamps and eternity for a background.  ~Thomas Carlyle

• When I give a lecture, I accept that people look at their watches, but what I do not tolerate is when they look at it and raise it to their ear to find out if it stopped."- Marcel Achard

• Until lions have their historians, tales of the hunt shall always glorify the hunters.  ~African Proverb

• "Knowledge is power. Rather, knowledge is happiness. To have knowledge, deep broad knowledge, is to know truth from false and lofty things from low.-- Helen Keller

• "The past is useless. That explains why it is past." Wright Morris

• All the ancient histories, as one of our wits say, are just fables that have been agreed upon.  ~Voltaire, Jeannot et Colin

• "UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity." Dennis Ritchie.

• We're going to have the best-educated American people in the world." Dan Quayle.

• An intellectual is someone who has found something more interesting than sex." Edgar Wallace.

You said it!

Richard Ponton

FETC 2006

• Computers are useless. They can only give you answers." Pablo Picasso.

• Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning." Rich Cook.

• Beware of computer programmers that carry screwdrivers." Leonard Brandwein.

• If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside." Robert X. Cringely.

• My problems all started with my early education. I went to a school for mentally disturbed teachers. -- Woody Allen

• I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them." Isaac Asimov.

• "I can speak Esperanto like a native." Spike Milligan

• "I'm a philosophy major. That means I can think deep thoughts about being unemployed."- Bruce Lee

• "Ever wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?"- John Mendosa

You said it!

Richard Ponton

FETC 2006

• "If your professor wrote it, it's as near to the truth as you ever need to get."- John Watson

• "Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils."- Hector Louis Berlioz

• Keyboard not found. Press < F1 > to RESUME. "Source unknown (appears in many common BIOSes as a real error message)

• "If a man is a fool, you don't train him out of being a fool by sending him to university. You merely turn him into a trained fool, ten times more dangerous."- Desmond Bagley

• History never looks like history when you are living through it.  ~John W. Gardner

• Education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper. -- Robert Frost

• "Only a good-for-nothing is not interested in his past." Sigmund Freud

• Legend:  A lie that has attained the dignity of age.  ~H.L. Mencken

You said it!

Richard Ponton

FETC 2006

Yogiisms

• It ain't over till it's over.

• This is like deja vu all over again.

Yogi Bera

• You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.Yogi Bera

• When you come to a fork in the road, take it.…another Yogi Bera

• The future ain't what it used to be.…still Yogi Bera

• It's tough to make predictions, especially about the future.

• …what??? Another Yogiism?

• I knew I was going to take the wrong train, so I left early.

Who is the Yogi Bera guy???

Baseball is ninety percent mental. The other half is physical.

The Great Philanderer, Yogi Bera