ChildrenGrief & BereavementHow can we understand and help a child deal with their pain of loss
Erica Olsen
CQ UniversityMasters of Clinical Psychology
What Contributes to Loss
Consider these questions, think about your own grief experience for a moment…
• 1. Think about a loss you have experienced
• 2. What losses do you think children would experience
• 3. How does your own grief sit with you now
Loss is Universal
Grief is normal
No two grief's are the same
A part of living
A process we all go through
Sesame Street deals with the BIG emotions…………….
Living with the pain of LossSupporting grieving children
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•Listen and give reassurance
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•Provide the opportunity to express their feelings
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•Be Consistent and provide a safe place
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•Ensure responses are appropriate for the age
Grief Work
Supporting grieving children
• Acknowledge the reality of the death or loss
• Modify the family world view to incorporate the loss
• Re-organize the family system to help them move on
How can you help…..
“Walk through the process with the child”
RESPECTThe child’s need is to be respected, encourage them to talk about the loss
UNDERSTANDINGAs you gain understanding it will help you understand the child
ENABLEMENTWe don’t cure grief, we support and enhance the normal healing process
DEVELOPMENTAL DIFFERENCES
Why are children thinking and feeling this way ……
• Age 0-3 • No concept of death, no image of object or person• Experience the effect of the caregivers grief• Age 3-5• No understanding of permanency• Difficulty distinguishing fact from fantasy• Separation anxiety and fear• Age 6-10• May not realize every living thing dies they begin to understand death is
final• Begin to use coping strategies• Adolescents• Beginning to contemplate meaning and understand, death is final
What am I looking for in the Grief Process ……..
Mediating the risk……
• Developing and use of rituals• Managing any unfinished business• Education around death and grieving• Family and Peer support networks
ChildrenGrief and Loss • A final word from the author…… Remember to be a loving listener always
Erica OlsenCQUniversityMasters in Clinical Psychology.
Children Grief and Loss Useful Websites……..Cruse Bereavement Care: www.crusebereavementcare.org.ukThe Child Bereavement Trust: www.child bereavement.org.ukFactsheetsMental Health and Growing Up. For parents, tearchers and young people: www.repsych.ac.ukBooksWalsh, F & McGoldrick, M. (2004). Living Beyond Loss: Death in the FamilyWollfelt, A. D. (2001). 1. Healing a Childs Grieving Heart: 100 Practical Ideas of Families,
Friends and Caregivers2. Healing Your Grieving Heart for Teens: 100 Practical Ideas, simple
tips for understanding and expressing your grief