Download pdf - Communications: Quest for Excellence

Oops!I didn’t mean it to come out that way!

(a.k.a “Understanding how attitude enhances and affects communication.”)

Scott “Q” MarcusCRP, www.ThisTimeIMeanIt.com707.442.6243Facebook.com/ThisTimeIMeanIt@ThisTimeIMeanIt

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Your Attitude

2

Your Attitude

Pretty Good69%

Extremely Upbeat10%

Average19%

Below Average1%

79%

2

Co-Workers’

3

Pretty Good49%

Extremely Upbeat3%

Average36%

Below Average10%

Extremely Poor1%

52%

2Your comments are welcomed: [email protected] • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com4

Others’

Extremely Upbeat1%

Pretty Good30%

Average57%

Below Average12%

31%

Your comments are welcomed: [email protected] • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Attitude

“Complex interaction between feelings and beliefs that affect how we react to our environment.”

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Your comments are welcomed: [email protected] • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com6

Honest Attitude PrayerSo far today, God, I've done

all right.

I haven't gossiped, haven't lost

my temper, haven't been

greedy, grumpy, nasty, selfish,

over-indulgent, or told

anyone to mind their own

business and stay out of mine.

I'm really glad about that!…


Honest Attitude Prayer

But, in a few minutes,

God, I'm going to get out

of bed, and from then on

I'm probably going to need

a lot more help.

Examples of Attitude 7

I bet living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween. -‐Age 13









The Zebra Rule

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The Zebra Rule

8


The Basics


Logical

Physical

Emotional

Spiritual

< Activity! Inspiration >

< Execution Creation >

The Basics


Logical

Physical

<<<<Change

Emotional

Spiritual



The Basics


Logical

Physical

<<<<Change

Emotional

Spiritual



The Basics


Attitude


Attitude

Feelings Beliefs


Feelings

Attitude


Feelings

Attitude


Feelings

Experience(Observations)

Attitude


Feelings


Biology

Attitude


Response

Feelings


Biology

Attitude


Conflict Cycle

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Conflict Cycle

12


Conflict Cycle CALM

12


Conflict Cycle

Expectations

CALM

12


Noise

Conflict Cycle

Expectations

CALM

12


Noise

Conflict Cycle

Expectations

Resolution

CALM

12


Noise

Conflict Cycle

Expectations

Resolution

Follow Up

CALM

12


Reasons for Conflict

13


Reasons for Conflict

•Shoulds

•Disqualifying

•Inappropriate Rescue

•Perfectionism

•Boundary Violation

•Selective Viewing

13


Support vs. Saving

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Support vs. Saving

14

• Can I help?

• Want my help?

• Do I want to help?


Conflict Styles

15

•firecracker•cold shoulder•backstabber

•memory lane•social zinger•last word


Dealing with Others

• Happy or Right?

• Five Year Rule

• Understand intentions


The 3 Rs

• Recognize

• Reflect

• Redirect

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Think “LAST”

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Think “LAST”

18

L

A

S

T


Think “LAST”

L isten

A pologize (Acknowledge)

S olve

T hank

18

L

A

S

T


Most Powerful Word


Most Powerful Word

WOW



• Begin with “I”• No Interruptions

• No Denials• No Cross Complaints

Fair Fighting


Putting it all Together

1. In

tent

ion


Putting it all Together

2. Pr

iming

3. Q

uesti

oning

4. Li

stenin

g

5. C

larify

ing

6. Su

gges

ting

7. T

hank

ing

Oops!I didn’t mean it to come out that way!

(a.k.a “Understanding how attitude enhances and affects communication.”)

Scott “Q” MarcusCRP, www.ThisTimeIMeanIt.com707.442.6243Facebook.com/ThisTimeIMeanIt@ThisTimeIMeanIt