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MANAGING DIFFICULT PEOPLE

By

Dick Horton, CPRP, AICP, CPSI Certified Park and Recreation Professional

Certified Playground Safety Inspector

American Institute of Certified Planners

Management

Fees & Charges Policies

Pricing Objectives

Service Standards

Consensus Building

Services Offered

Services Offered

Planning

Park System Master Plans

Feasibility Studies

Strategic Planning

Services Offered

Design

Aquatic Facilities

Golf Courses

Community Centers

Trails

Park Sites

Tennis Courts

Fountains

Name The Best and Worst Things About Going to Work

People.

People.

How Much Do You Remember?

Young People Who Started College This Past Fall Were Born in 1982.

Do Not Remember the Cold War.

Their Lifetime Has Always Included AIDS.

Bottle Caps Have Always Been Screw off and Plastic.

Atari and Vinyl Records Predate Them.

As Far As They Know, Stamps Have Always Cost $.34

How Much Do You Remember?

They Have Never Seen Larry Bird Play Basketball.

Jay Leno Has Always Hosted the Tonight Show.

They Cannot Fathom Not Having a Remote Control.

They Have Always Had an Answering Machine.

They Do Not Care Who Shot J.R. And Have No Idea Who J.R. Is.

The Way They See The World

Baby Boomers Born 1946 - 1960

Optimistic

Driven

Love/Hate

Consensus

Personal Gratification

The Musical

Drive-thrus

Suess

Generation X Born 1960 - 1980

Skeptical

Balanced

Unimpressed

Competence

Reluctant to Commit

Skinheads

Drive-bys

Kervorkian

Generation Y Born 1980 - 2001

Hopeful

Determined

Polite

Pulling Together

Inclusive

Pick a Color

Disk Drives

Drew

Outlook

Work Ethic

View of Authority

Leadership By

Relationships

Hair

Drives

Dr.

Traditionalists Born Before 1946

Practical

Traditionalist

Respectful

Hierarchy

Self-sacrifice

The Flattop

Sunday Drives

Spock

Dismissal.

Use of Human Resource Department.

Documentation

Written Work Plan

Progressive Discipline

Performance Planning and Appraisal System.

Management Tools

40% of Performance Based on How You Do Your Job.

60% of Your Job Based on What You Do.

Performance Planning & Appraisal

Performance Planning & Appraisal How You Do Your Job

Customer Service - Internal/external.

Technical Skills - Works to Expand Job Knowledge; Anticipates and Identifies Work Problems.

Organizational Behavior - Builds and Maintains Positive Team-oriented Working Relationships.

Self-management - Accepts Responsibility for Own Work and Reliably Follows Through With Minimum Supervision.

Performance Planning & Appraisal What you Do

Lives Within the Allocated Budget.

Develops Three New Programs.

Increases Customer Satisfaction Rating of Adult Sports by 5%.

Attends 10 Hours of Continuing Education Programs.

MOMENT OF TRUTH

Moment Of Truth Chart

Negative Factors Basic Expectations Delightful Factors

Name of Process/Service/Product :

Name of Process Owner :

Date Completed :

Date to be Revised :

What is a Difficult Person?

Does What You Don’t Want and Doesn’t Do What You Do Want.

Attitude versus Behavior

Attitude Is Not Measurable but Will Manifest Itself in a Behavior Which Can Be Measured.

Behavior Is Measurable.

Percentage Of Budget

0%

10%

20%

30%

40%

50%

60%

70%

Personnel

Materials

Services

I.D.C.'s

Things We Know About Organizations

All Organizations Are Perfectly Aligned to Get the Results They Get.

Things We Know About Managers

They Get Things Done Through Others.

We Need Subordinates More Than They Need Us.

Need to Provide Direction, Latitude and Authority to Do Our Jobs, Training, Feedback and Recognition.

Time Management Matrix

3

2 1

URGENT

IMP

OR

TA

NT

Planning, crisis prevention, relationship building

4 Needless interruptions, unimportant phone calls, unnecessary reports, unimportant meetings

Busywork, junk mail, excessive relaxation, idle chit-chat, time wasters

NOT URGENT

NO

T

IMP

OR

TA

NT

Crises, pressing problems, last-minute meetings, cramming on projects, rushing to meet deadlines

P A C I N G

Meeting Someone Where They Are; to Reduce the Differences Between Yourself and Others in Order to Increase the Amount of Common Ground.

Communication (1967 UCLA Study)

7% of the Message Is Heard.

35% of the Exchange Has to Do With the Tone of Voice.

58% of the Exchange Has to Do With Body or Non-verbal Signs.

Things We Know About People

If You Don’t Expect It, and Tell Your People You Want It, You’ll Never Get It.

People Are Very Poor Mind Readers.

Employee Satisfiers Are Achievement, Recognition, Latitude, Authority and Resources to do the job.

Employee Dissatisfiers Are Company Policy, Administration, Supervision, and Work Conditions.

Times to Correct Behavior

When Output Is Affected.

When Behavior Affects Output of Others.

When Behavior Violates Policies or Procedures.

When Behavior Becomes Too Annoying or Offensive to Overlook.

Personality Types

RELATIONSHIP

Passive Assertive

Aggressive Assertive

ENTERAINERS

• Know-it-Alls

• Grenade

TASK

RULERS

• Tanks

• Snipers

RELATORS

• Yes

• Maybe

ANALYTICAL

• Complainers

• No

Personality Types

•ENTERAINERS

• Know-it-Alls

• Non-Responsive

•RELATORS

• Yes

• Maybe

RELATIONSHIP

Passive Assertive


TASK

•ANALYTICAL

• Complainers

• No

•Restless

•Critical

•Blunt

•Uncooperative

•Needs Control

•Risk Taker

•Organized

•Efficient

•Results Oriented

Ruler Type -

“Tank”, “Sniper”

Personality Types

•ENTERAINERS

• Know-it-Alls

• Non-Responsive

•RULERS

• Tank

• Snipers

•RELATORS

• Yes

• Maybe

RELATIONSHIP

Passive Assertive


TASK

•Very Slow Pace

•Resist Change

•Fear Making Mistakes

•Become Defensive

•Gathers Information

•Accurate

•Task Priority

•Slow & Deliberate

Analytical Type -

“Complainer”, “No Person”

Personality Types

•ENTERAINERS

• Know-it-Alls

• Non-Responsive

•RULERS

• Tank

• Snipers

RELATIONSHIP

Passive Assertive


TASK

•ANALYTICAL

• Complainers

• No

•Fear Confrontation

•Fear Disapproval

•Delay Decisions

•Wishy Washy

•Passive

•Indecisive

•Sensitive

•Considerate

•High Relationship

•Like Others

Relator Type -

“Yes”, “Maybe” People

Personality Types

•RELATORS

• Yes

• Maybe

RELATIONSHIP

Passive Assertive


TASK

•ANALYTICAL

• Complainers

• No

•RULERS

• Tank

• Snipers

•Overeager

•Unrealistic

•Manipulative

•Center of Attention

•Desire Prestige

•Explosive Behavior

•Creative Views

•Charismatic

•Knowledgeable

Entertainer Type -

“Grenade”, “Know it All”

To Deal with Rulers - Tanks

•ENTERAINERS

•Grenades

•Know-it-Alls

•RELATORS

•Yes

•Maybe

•ANALYTICAL

•Complainers

•No

•RULERS

•Tank

•Snipers

• Stand Your Ground.

• Be Firm But Don’t Argue.

• Interrupt If You Need To.

• Be Assertive Because They Perceive You As Weak.

• Remember They Need to Make Progress and Get Things Done So Allow for That.

To Deal with Rulers - Snipers

•ENTERAINERS

•Grenades

•Know-it-Alls

•RELATORS

•Yes

•Maybe

•ANALYTICAL

•Complainers

•No

•RULERS

•Tank

•Snipers

• Something You Did Blocked Their Momentum So They Want to Get Even.

• They Will Use Social Constraints to Vent Their Frustration.

• Bring Attention to the Sniper on a Timely Basis.

• Ask If Others in the Group Agree.

To Deal with Rulers - Snipers

•ENTERAINERS

•Grenades

•Know-it-Alls

•RELATORS

•Yes

•Maybe

•ANALYTICAL

•Complainers

•No

•RULERS

•Tank

•Snipers

• Recognize Legitimate Issues & Get Specific.

• Provide a Peaceful Solution.

• Sometimes There Is a Legitimate Issue So Resolve It With the Group So You Can Proceed.

• In Municipal Government, We Are Fortunate to Have Access to the Grievance Procedure to Offset Sniper Issues.

To Deal with Complainer

•ENTERAINERS

•Grenades

•Know-it-Alls

•RELATORS

•Yes

•Maybe

•ANALYTICAL

•Complainers

•No

•RULERS

•Tank

•Snipers

• The Complainer Is the Way He Is Because of a Defense Mechanism - If Things Don’t Work Out for Them on an Issue.

• Remember They Are Aware of a Lot of Problems Because of Their Analytical Skills.

• Don’t Accuse a Complainer of Being a Complainer or They Will Become Defensive.

To Deal with Complainer

•ENTERAINERS

•Grenades

•Know-it-Alls

•RELATORS

•Yes

•Maybe

•ANALYTICAL

•Complainers

•No

•RULERS

•Tank

•Snipers

• Listen Attentively.

• Interrupt, If Necessary Once You Have Their Main Points.

• Ask Specific Questions About Their Generalizations: Who, What, Why?

• Don’t Agree With Complaints.

• Switch to Problem Solving.

• If They Complain About Others - Pursue It.

To Deal with “No” Person

•ENTERAINERS

•Grenades

•Know-it-Alls

•RELATORS

•Yes

•Maybe

•ANALYTICAL

•Complainers

•No

•RULERS

•Tank

•Snipers

• Remember They Really Do Feel It Is Hopeless.

• They Suffered a Bitter Setback Early in Life.

• Remember They Have Good Intent of Keeping You Out of Trouble.

• Don’t Agree With “No” Person.

To Deal with “No” Person

•ENTERAINERS

•Grenades

•Know-it-Alls

•RELATORS

•Yes

•Maybe

•ANALYTICAL

•Complainers

•No

•RULERS

•Tank

•Snipers

• Avoid Being Dragged in.

• Be Prepared to “Go It Alone” With Yours Ideas and Optimism.

• Use Them As a Resource As a Useful Warning Sign.

• Raise the Negatives Before They Do.

•ENTERAINERS

•Grenades

•Know-it-Alls

•RELATORS

•Yes

•Maybe

•ANALYTICAL

•Complainers

•No

•RULERS

•Tank

•Snipers

• Don’t Want to Be Bad or Wrong.

• They Don’t Think of the Downside of Their Misinformation..

• They Fear Disapproval.

• Deal With Them As You Would With a “Maybe” Person.

• Slow Down, Surface Issues, Problem Solve, Reassure Them and Ask for Future Commitment.

To Deal with “Yes” People

•ENTERAINERS

•Grenades

•Know-it-All’s

•RELATORS

•Yes

•Maybe

•ANALYTICAL

•Complainers

•No

•RULERS

•Tank

•Snipers

• Reassure Them & Make It Safe for Them to Be Honest.

• Examine the Facts With Them; Prioritize Alternatives.

• Leave Action Steps in Your Hands.

• If the Problem Is You, Acknowledge the Problems They Tell You About.

• Ask for the Commitment in the Future to Discuss Issues.

To Deal with “Maybe” People

To Deal with the “Grenade”

•ENTERAINERS

•Grenades

•Know-it-Alls

•RELATORS

•Yes

•Maybe

•ANALYTICAL

•Complainers

•No

•RULERS

•Tank

•Snipers

• “Tanks” Do It on Purpose - “Grenades” Don’t.

• One Trigger for Them Is When Their Ideas Aren’t Being Recognized.

• Get Their Attention While Showing Concern for Their Prestige.

To Deal with the “Grenade”

•ENTERAINERS

•Grenades

•Know-it-Alls

•RELATORS

•Yes

•Maybe

•ANALYTICAL

•Complainers

•No

•RULERS

•Tank

•Snipers

• After Their Explosions, Temper Tantrums, Give Them a Few Minutes to Cool off.

• Find Out What Triggered the Explosion

• May Need Counseling As They Don’t Mean to Lose Their Composure.

To Deal with “Know it All”

•ENTERAINERS

•Grenades

•Know-it-Alls

•RELATORS

•Yes

•Maybe

•ANALYTICAL

•Complainers

•No

•RULERS

•Tank

•Snipers

• They Truly Believe What They Are Saying.

• Their Ideas May Sound Good but May Lead Others Down the Wrong Path

To Deal with “Know it All”

•ENTERAINERS

•Grenades

•Know-it-Alls

•RELATORS

•Yes

•Maybe

•ANALYTICAL

•Complainers

•No

•RULERS

•Tank

•Snipers

• Do Not Inhale Their Hot Air.

• Give Them a Way Out & Maintain Their Self-esteem or They Will Become Defensive.

• They Have Good Ideas So Be Prepared With Your Facts.

Personality Types

•Let Them Know Time Limit for Meeting.

•Ask Open-ended Questions Like:

What’s Going On?

How Did This Happen?

•Look at Them With an Expectant Look After Asking Questions.

•Wait Silently After Asking a Question.

Non Responsive Person -

No Quadrant

Personality Types

•Use Humor, if Possible Like:

I’ll Start Talking and You Blink Once for Yes, Etc.

•Silence Won’t Make Things Better.

•They Do It Out of Fear or Spite.

•If They Do It Out of Spite, Let Them Know the Negative Consequences of Their Behavior.

Non Responsive Person -

No Quadrant

To Make a Difficult Person from Personality Types

Ruler - Impede His Progress; Don’t Give Reasons for Decisions; Pair Him up With an Analytical Person.



Analytical - Do the Unexpected in the Middle of a Project.




Relator - Be Insensitive to Their Feelings.

Relator - Be Insensitive to Their Feelings.




Entertainer - Ignore Them or Put Them Down in Front of Others.

Communication Outcomes

Know What You Want.

Pay Attention.

Be Flexible.

Key Principles

Maintain or Enhance Self-esteem.

Listen & Respond With Empathy.

Ask for Help in Solving the Problem.

Interaction Guidelines

Describe the Problem in a Friendly Manner.

Ask for the Employee’s Help in Solving the Problem.

Discuss Causes of the Problem.

Identify and Write Down Possible Solutions.

Decide on Specific Actions to Be Taken by Each of You.

Agree on a Specific Follow-up Date.

MANAGING DIFFICULT PEOPLE By

Dick Horton, CPRP, AICP, CPSI Certified Park and Recreation Professional

Certified Playground Safety Inspector

American Institute of Certified Planners

PRPS State Conference

Seven Springs Mountain Resort March 27, 2001