Dealing with Parents

• Teachers are unprepared to deal with difficult parents

• Teachers need to learn parent management skills

• Teachers can learn how to effectively handle parents

Pinocchio’s Mother

• Insists that her child never tells a lie

• Makes teachers want to yell “liar, liar, pants on fire!!”

• Prefers to focus on teachers mistakes instead of child’s

Pinocchio's’ parent will blame the Teacher

How to Handle Pinocchio’s Mom

• Focus on Specifics (who, what, when, where, how?)

• Be prepared. Have your facts ready.• If it regarding an assignment - know when it was

due, and have a grading rubric present• It is best to have the student present and to

directly talk to the student• Remember you can deliver the message without

embarrassing the child, you do not need a full confession

• No Sarcasm!!

The Stealth Zapper

• The Stealth Zapper gently implies that you (or a colleague) aren’t up to par. However, these criticisms fly so low under to radar that you may not realize you have been zapped until you stop to think about what was said.

• Are big supporters of the school when it benefits his or her child.

• Often anonymously complain• Overall goal is to achieve

some kind of advantage for her child

When dealing with the Stealth Zapper . . .

• Deal with them directly, and be polite

• Remain positive or noncommittal when speaking about a fellow teacher

• Do not spend time with this kind of parent unless it is absolutely necessary

An ExampleS.Z – Miss T was so

strict. She had no sense of humor. Not like you, according to my daughter.

Teacher – I’m glad your daughter enjoys my jokes. I enjoy having her in class.

Helicopter Mom

• Usually begin in kindergarten• Hovers constantly, ready to

save child from anything• Invested in every facet of her

child’s school day• Spends a lot of time at school• Like to compare their child to

others students• Has a hard time letting her

child take responsibility for his or her actions

How to Handle Helicopter Parents

• Reassure parent that their child is capable, and can compete with other students in the class

• Communicate with parent as often as possible

• Keep information about other students confidential

• Never give this parent your cell or home phone number

• Be grateful that they care about their child’s success

Teacher Parent Conferences

Parent Teacher Conferences

• Parents want to be reassured that you really know their child

• Try to be on the “same team” as the parents, everyone is their for the child

• Focus first on the positive• Let parent’s vent and do

not take it personally

The Bottom Line

Remember that every parent wants to know if their child is just another student to

you, or whether you really know him or her. Parents want to know if they can

count on you to treat their child fairly, even kindly. They hope that you see in their son or daughter all the special things that they

do. . . When parents and teachers are partners, it’s wonderful for the child!