Relational Aggression in our SchoolsKatie Roche

Current Issues in Education Fall 2008

Relational Aggression Outline• What is Relational Aggresssion (RA)?• What are the three roles of bullying?• The roles of Adolescents involved in RA.• Who are the Aggressors of Relational Aggression?• What are the Behaviors of RA in Adolescents?• What are the Behaviors of RA in Youngsters?• Why does the Aggressor act out?• What are the Signs?• What are the Long Term Effects of RA to the Victim?• Tips for Parents for RA and Bullying• Tips for Parents with Girls involved in RA• Tips for Teachers and Schools• The Ophelia Project• What has “The Ophelia Project” done for schools?• How has Highmark Healthy High 5 helped schools with bullying?• Facts of RA & Bullying• Highmark Posters• Real Life Stories• Summary

What is Relational Aggresssion (RA)?

• Type of Bullying – Negative action carried out by physical contact, rumors, or exclusion

• Behavior intended on damaging one’s relationships.

• Manipulation used to hurt or control another’s relationships.

• The threatening to hurt one’s relationships. • Harm to one’s self esteem, friendships, or

social status

What are the three roles of bullying?

• Aggressor – The individual doing the damage

• Target – The victim of the damage• Bystander – The children caught

somewhere in the middle

The roles of Adolescents involved in RA.

• The Queen – Everyone in the group does what she wants ~ social leader ~ loses her sense of self.

• The Sidekick – Looks up to the queen as being in charge ~ rarely has her own opinion.

• The Gossip – Friends with everyone ~ gains trust from others to get the information ~ Secretive.

• The Floater – Moves around groups ~ avoids conflicts ~ Does not compete

• The Bystander – Want to be a peacemaker ~ knows the queens behavior is wrong ~ accomodates

• The Wannabe – Will do anything to be in the circle ~ doesn’t know the difference between her wants and the group’s wants.

• The Target – The victim ~ feels excluded ~ Rejects people because of the affects of being the target

Who are the Aggressors of Relational Aggression?

• Girls• RA is most commonly found and studied

in Adolescent girls, although it can be found in boys.

• Girls as young as three and four years old also participate in RA.

What are the Behaviors of RA in Adolescents?

• Exclusion• Gossip• Rumor Spreading• Teasing• Name Calling• Physical Abuse• Cyberbullying

• Taunts & Insults• Intimidation• Manipulation

What are the Behaviors of RA in Youngsters?

• Retaliation• Exclusion• Name Calling• Stopping Friendships• Making Fun• Manipulation• Peer Pressure

Why does the Aggressor act out?

• Fear• Power• Control • Popularity• Security• The way they were raised ~ Children

raised by authoritarian parents.

What are the Signs?

• The target acts afraid of the environment where the act is happening (such as school, bus, or activities).

• The target may act sad or depressed. • The target will show signs of a low self-

esteem.• The target may be very anxious.

What are the Long Term Effects of RA to the Victim?

• A Hostile Learning Environment

• Chronic Absences• Depression • Suicide• Increased Anxiety

• More Anger• Eating Disorders• Being Lonely• Lack of Self-

Esteem

Tips for Parents for RA and Bullying

• Keep a written record of all incidents of bullying or RA.

• When concerned ask a teacher, set up meetings, and follow up to see what has been done!

• In order to better handle stress, meet with the guidance counselor.

• Keep notes on what has happened with the school being involved.

Tips for Parents with Girls involved in RA

• Help get girls involved in activities outside of school.

• Encourage them to be in relationships with all types of people for the right reasons.

• Always listen to what they have to say! • Teach & Model behaviors that you want

to be repeated.

Tips for Parents with girls involved in RA (continued)

• Always talk about both sides of the issue to know for sure if your child is the aggressor or victim.

• Encourage your daughter to not be involved.

• Be aware of everything that your child is doing on the computer.

• Seek Counseling when necessary.

Tips for Teachers and Schools• Create an environment with clear limits on

what is acceptable and unacceptable and follow through with it.

• Always investigate any report of bullying.• Meet with the victim and the aggressor

separately (there are 2 sides to every story)• Be careful not to blame the victim or let the

victim feel like they are being blamed.• Create an anti-bullying program.

The Ophelia Project• Founded & Headquartered in Erie, PA in 1997• Goal was to listen to girls and found at the

root of the problem was that many girls are suffering from RA

• Provide educational resources, programs, and advocate for healthy relationships

• Achieve long term changes to provide safe climates

• Mission has evolved to include boys too • Serves youth and adult population

What has “The Ophelia Project” done for schools?

• 1.) Developed “Creating a Safe School” (CASS) for schools to celebrate students.

• 2.) Developed an elementary school curriculum.

• 3.) Developed “How Girls Hurt Each Other” as an awareness program.

• 4.) Encouragement for schools to adopt a zero tolerance policy for RA.

1.) Creating a Safe School (CASS)

• Involves the entire school to make long term changes in the behaviors of the students.

• Give students the ability to make positive choices.

• Provides Consulting with experts.• Workshops for CASS• Mentor Training

2.) An Elementary School Curriculum

• Early Intervention • Examines the effects of media on

children• Provides Mentoring• Gives Conferences on; mentoring, eating

disorders, community building, and RA.

3.) How Girls Hurt Each Other

• Began in 1998• Two day awareness program given to

middle school girls.• Goal is to make girls aware of what is

going on, their role, and how to stop it. • Role plays • Express to girls how the girl caught in

the middle can make a positive change.

4.) Zero Tolerance Policy for RA.

• “Name the Beast” – admitting there is a problem and tackling it head on.

• Workshops & Training• Anti-Bullying Plan & Curriculum• Early Intervention• Everyone bans together – parents,

teachers, counselors, administration, and students.

How has Highmark Healthy High 5 helped schools with bullying?

• Developed $10,000 grants for anti-bullying programs in schools.

• The goal is to improve the overall health of children from 6 to 18 yrs old.

• 5 focuses are; nutrition, physical activity, self-esteem, grieving, and bullying prevention.

• With the sources from Highmark students will be encouraged to adopt healthy habits.

• Corry Elementary School received a grant and will write and produce a show about bullying.

Facts of RA & Bullying

• The National Education Association says “160,000 children miss school each day out of fear.”

• A child is bullied every 7 minutes.• 77% of students are bullied through; mental, physical,

or verbal aggression.• 8% of students do not go to class one day a month out

of fear. • Bullying can be reduced by 50% where school wide

programs are adopted. • Over 13 million children in the U.S. from 6 to 17 have

been a victim of cyberbullying.

Real Life Stories

• Kindergarten Girls• Kindergarten Boys• My Sister in Middle School• Three Way Calling• Hate Pages

Summary• RA does exist inside and outside of our

schools• The best practices are Early Intervention & a

Zero Tolerance Policy• Watch for the signs of RA• Tackle a problem head on by “Naming the

Beast”• When a problem is found – Come up with a plan

that involves everyone and notify them