Men must TEACH and Build Their Sons into MenSociety has greatly changed. As I grew up, the boy child knew what he was expected to do at every stage in life. He could be able to learn from the older boys and the younger men. Yes, he could be disciplined by the older ones if he never did what was expected. Apparently the culture was very well balanced. The men and women took up their rightful roles to teach and correct the boys and girls respectively. The trend as I see is rather disappointing. The boys are growing up only to become older boys; never maturing to a place of living as mature Godly men. The boy child needs to grow in a Godly way. He has to be guided well.

Ephesians 4:1

I, therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you to walk worthy of the calling with which you were called, (NKJV)

What we have now are boys who have no clue what it means to be a man, leave alone being Godly man. Some two weeks ago a friend came visiting with us and we had lengthy discussion on my past and how I brought up my three daughters and a son who are all adults. The father in the home must play his rightful role and be a model that the boys would want to imitate.

As I interacted with my children I was able to provide the necessary leadership. My dealing with my son was to harden him to be a responsible person who would take up his role of the man in his home when he marries. You cannot let the society mould our sons. The society is not kind. The older men must ask: ‘What has God instructed me as the father to teach my children and in light of the culture we live in; what are some practical areas that I need to build into them as well?’

The following are areas each father must instill in their sons:

1. Teach them about God. Deuteronomy 6:4-9

"Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one! You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. "And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates. (NKJV)

Teach the boys to begin to learn about God by showing them who He is with easy, concrete examples. God is a warrior, a strong tower, a rock, a strong foundation, a dad, etc. Easy to understand concepts that help build a picture in their minds about who He is.

2. Teach them to work -- hard. Genesis 2:15

‘Then the LORD God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to tend and keep it’. (NKJV)

God created work for men. This was not a result of sin. Before sin entered the world, God had already instructed Adam to tend the garden. An area that is so disappointing is the one of work. We have very many young people that want it easy. They don’t want to tire. They would rather sit and are given. This is a bad habit which is making men look like babies. God is a worker and our boys must learn to work. As I grew up my mother encouraged us to work hard. I left home at age 19, and I never depended on my parents or anybody else after that. I worked.

3. Teach them to obey. Ephesians 6:1

‘Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right’. (NKJV)

This is consistent throughout scripture. Obey God. In order for them to do that, they need to learn on a smaller level. Teach them to obey quickly, consistently and joyfully.

As part of this, we want them to know there are consequences to sin; one of those is separation. Many of us have stories of people around us who lost their jobs, their families or their integrity by sinful decisions in their lives. We want to teach them early how when they choose to disobey, there are consequences.

4.  Teach them to lead. Titus 2:6-8

‘Likewise, exhort the young men to be sober-minded, in all things showing yourself to be a pattern of good works; in doctrine showing integrity, reverence, incorruptibility, sound speech that cannot be condemned, that one who is an opponent may be ashamed, having nothing evil to say of you’. (NKJV)

This is leading by taking responsibility; a leading that is motivated by serving. You know how little boys try to whine because they are trying to explain why they made the poor choice they made. The boys must learn how to lead by taking responsibility. The boys need to learn what it looks like to offer their strength to others: to those that are being picked on, to women, to their friends. Our culture consistently offers us pictures of men who are greedy, prideful and starving for more power. Teaching the boys what it looks like to lead begins by teaching them to take responsibility.

5. Teach them to love. Ephesians 5:2

‘And walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling aroma’. (NKJV)

What does it look like to love God, love your wife, and love your kids? What does it look like for a dad to submit his heart to God, and to seek to follow him daily? Boys must see their fathers reading the Bible in the morning. They need to see the fathers loving their mothers and then the fathers can lovingly teach, encourage, train and disciple them.

FinallyWe cannot sit and expect our boys to become men without our inputs. I challenge the men in the society to take up their mantle and let us not blame the society or the government in this. The boy child is easily inclined to peer and societal pressure. I believe we will not sit and see our boys’ lives destroyed. We can do something about it.