I Pissed in the Tub Again

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.,.

f..{

.- ~7' '.~ ..".

..-.-- ~ - . -- - _..- -.

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"Mommy I Grandma's 01 enough todie isn It she?"

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"W ill college be th is suck-ass?"

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IIIf you don't pay up soon, 1 1 1 1 break yourother fuckin' kneecap!"

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"That'll be enough 'God Bless You's'-the manis an athiest."

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"Iwas humping the pillowond my penis got,

sick." '

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"Five inches, MommyH FIVE INCHES'"

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THE FAM ILY RAC ISTTM

"Mrs . Del porte says we shoul d get Kittycat a

spade so she can be havin' a

slave of her own."-

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"Mommy, will YOll tell Billy to stop breathin'

and just fuckin' die already,"

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• "T w o ic e 'te as , fo ur milks a a knife to cut th e

throats of these precious lill bostordsl"

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"Jeffy's been possessed by the hideous

demon that lives in this plant."

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% '1t h i n k KittycQt'$ in heat again."

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"I F INA llY POPPED M ISS B ROW N!"

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"Can we come home with you and see all• II

your wives.

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"We'll be there in a minute, Mommy--as soon

as we finish diggin' BarfYs grave."

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"Doddy made me give him a Joe Bob."

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"How do you spell 'Me'? --And don't go. too fast ...

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.~

"I'm hot, Mommy, will you blow me.'

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'r y ou 'II f i nd the restrooms if you pull

your goddam head out of your ass and

LOOK for them."

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"I was [ust down saying 'goodby to 'the ocean an'

this big -guy came over and pissed all overme."

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IIMommy says welre

buy ing G randm a som e TOILET W ATERl

The old bitch is so senile, she'll prob'ly wear

itlll

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"They're Pilgrims and they invented gen'cide."

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"If you find any hairs in the food, Grandma,don't worry about it. They're just

pubes."

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·'Don't worry, J~f7'while you're in the hospitalwe'Il beproyln for you all the time.

Prayin' that you diel"

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"Don't be shy, Pops. Off wi t ' dem trunks

and out wi t ' da solorni."

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"H elIK ES m el H e's not even fightin'me when I put my fingers up his butt."

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" G ' N 1G H T , YOU FUCKERS!"

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liThe difference between dogs and cats is catslike to THINK about what they're

going to fUC~."

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"When the guy said it was a pussy trap I

thought ... "

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"Sho ll I fe ll G od w hat we do in the tub?"

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"M om m y I I hurt m y sel f playin' Jesus!"

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"You'll hear a lot more goin' on i f you'll put thatthing on m y testicles. II

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"Billy says the doctor wil l use hedge shears likeDaddy's to take my foreskin off." I

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"If you want me to read .to you you'Il have to stop

turnin9 poges looking for titty pictures. II

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"M om m y I NOW how many days till B illy goes

back to Juviej"

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'Those funny brownies of yours sure made

me awful hungry, Mommy. II

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THE HEAVEN 'S GATE CIRCUSTM

"I don't know which is longer-the nightbefore Christmas Or the night before

we get into the Mother Ship and go to our

new home in the sky."

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"H e has som e tee th . but he's still

,very easy on the cock." '

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"M em ber w hen Sam w as a I lt+le pup an d w e usedto put n ew spape rs on the k i tch en floo r fo r

h im to sh it on ? °

That w as really fun , huh?"

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"When you see a dot on the ceiling that wasn't there

before, then that' swhen the acid is kickin' in."

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"I'm gonna catch me a MAN '"

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"Next week weill throw down some crumbs."

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'Wave your ann, Jeffy. Yoo can't 'spectMommy to see you opening and closing

your zipper. II I

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"C o uld y oU w r ite 'B i lly , y o U little 0 55\1 0 1 e', on

the cake?"

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"We like you best. Our other sitter isn't a

swinger."