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DifferentBy Design!by
Sharon M. Barnes, MSSW, LCSWCreative Transformation Specialist
Phone: 303-987-0346
email to: Sharon@AcademyofCreativeLiving.com
www.GiftedTherapyDenver.com
Encouraging
Gifted Students:
“Finding the
Magic in Being a
MisFit”
Sharon M. Barnes, MSSW,LCSW
AKA the ScrapLady
Creative Transformation Specialist
MSSW, (San Diego State)
LCSW- CO
AKA the Scrap Lady: I help You
Create Success from Life’s Scraps
Creative Healing Presentations, PlayShops
& Retreats
Creative Healing & Creative Transformation
counseling & psychotherapy
Guide to the Gifted
I’ll Guide You through the Wilderness of
Inner Territory to Destinations of Delight!
Encouraging Gifted Students: “Finding the Magic in Being a MisFit”
Different by
DesignFiction:
Giftedness = (unfair) advantage
Gifted = Different = Deficient, Defective, Inferior
Truth:
Gifted = Different by Design
“Magic” can be hidden inside the experience of being a MisFit
What’s Going On?
High intelligence often combines
with
Asynchronous development
Intensity
Sensitivity
Complexity
Overexcitability
Inner Dissonance →
↑Vulnerability → Different = Inferior
Different = Inadequate
Different = Defective
Different = MisFit
Social isolation
Alienation
.
I feel like an alien
from another
planet
I feel like an
outcast
o First to raise my hand
o Last to be called on
o Last & worst on the
playground
o “What’s wrong with
me?”
o Cold War Era
o Air raid drills
o McCarthyism
o Bomb Shelters
o Night storm
o Lightning hit
tree
o Tangled in
covers
o No one came
when I called
o “Something’s
wrong with
Meet our Mascot!
o He had a RED NOSE; others’
noses were black
o He was ridiculed
o He was excluded
o He was shunned
o He was shamed
o He was ostracized
o He was banished into exile
o All because of his RED NOSE
o He ‘Saved the Day’ for everyone
o Also because of his RED NOSE
How to Identify
CASIGY Discouragement
SAD CASIGYs
Super-sensitivity
Anxiety
Depression
CASIGY Underachievement
↓ or ↑ sleep
↓ or ↑ appetite
Exaggerated reactions of any
kind
Bonus Tip!
What is the most powerful, yet hidden tool that parents and
teachers have to help CASIGY kids and teens deal with their
discouragement?
It’s the most natural way we all learn
It takes one to know one
You can't lead someone
where you are not willing
or able to go
The most powerful influence on the child is the
unlived life of the parent/teacher (Jung)
Use these tools for yourself first, then pass them
along
What else doesn’t work: “F’in” your way
Fake it
Fight it
Flee it
Flood it
Force it
What works: EEEEK your way through
Experience it (Coping)
Explore it (Coping)
Express it (Coping, Healing)
Embrace it (Healing)
Extract Benefit (Transformation)
Kreate a demonstration of it (Transformation)
EEEEK Your Way through Tough Times
CASIGY Tool Box: Coping Tools
Experience it
What you FEEL You Can HEAL (Gray)
Catch & Release Breathing
Explore it Stop, Look & Listen
Daily TNT (Tune iN Tool)
What’s Happening?
How am I feeling?
Express it Let your experience and your feelings out
Help something other than your body be the container for all of this emotional and psychic material
o #1 CASIGY Coping Tool: Breatheo Belly Breathing
o Catch & Release Breathing
o Relaxation/De-escalation Breathing
CASIGY Tool Box:
1. Breathe
CASIGY Tool Box: Tools for
Parents & Teachers of CASIGY
Students
Misbehavior = attempt to communicate needs
How to Know the Real Need:
Your own emotional reaction → Real Issue
Real Issue → Hidden Need
Hidden Need → Effective Intervention
Antidotes to CASIGY Discouragement
Antidote #2: Creative Healing
• 2• 3
• 1• 4Creative Coping
Creative Healing
Creative Healing
Creative Healing is needed when
o Hurts or emotional wounds are present
o Emotions are complex, conflicting and changing, like
cross currents, rip tides, & undertows in ocean
waves
Creative Healing involves Composting
Transforms negative into positive energy
Nature’s original recycling project
Manure becomes fertilizer─nature’s best
What in your life needs fertilizer?
Do you already have the raw materials?
Creative Healing CASIGY ToolBox:
Embrace it
Shovel it
Pick it up
Turn it over repeatedly, periodically
Extract Benefit from it
Connect with it through your senses
Limbic system assigns meaning
Kreate a Demonstration of it
Allow your hands to work with it
symbolically
What is implicit becomes explicit
Mind, body, soul & spirit become
healed, connected and integrated
Antidotes to CASIGY Discouragement
Antidote #3 Creative Transformation
• 2• 3
• 1• 4Creative Coping
Creative Healing
Creative
Transfor-mation
Creative Transformation
o Creative Healing targets your inner
wounds-what happened to you
o Creative Transformation targets your
Self-who you are
o As you continue to work with the
images revealed in the tangible
materials,
o The internal meaning changes
o Your Self is transformed.
o You are Set FREEMy Life’s Gone Up in Smoke
Nourish the Fire Within
4. Creative Contribution
• 2• 3
• 1• 4Creativ
e Contri-bution
Creative Coping
Creative Healing
Creative
Transfor-mation
Creative Contribution
To transform your RED NOSE
from a liability into an asset -
find the Gift hidden inside
your Red NOSE that
taps the depths of your CASIGY
uniqueness
develops all your CASIGY
abilities
Makes You COME ALIVE when
you do it
meets a need in those around
you
answers the call of your Destiny
Creative Contribution
Use your RED NOSE to “save the day”
Have the courage to return from exile
Have the heart to help (even) those who have hurt
you
Have the resolve to keep going through the tough
times
Have the love to fulfill your Destiny-to meet the
need that only you can meet
Have the faith to follow the Still, Small Voice
Have the creativity to be unconventional
Have the authenticity to BE YOU!
Your Personal Pilgrimage
o Personal = Universal
o RED NOSE = Call
o Creative Awareness
o Creative Coping
o Creative Healing
o Creative Transformation
o Creative Contribution
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