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Where there is Darth Vader….there areDIFFICULT INTERACTIONS.
Part 1:The ANATOMYof a Difficult Interaction
What causes them?
70%of all conflicts are caused by
misunderstandings.
1Misunderstanding
2Disagreement
Negotiable
Non-negotiable(rarely the case)
What causes them?
Why are they so difficult?
1
Subject Matter
Easy
1. S
ub
ject
Mat
ter
“We found the rebel base.”
Easy Medium
1. S
ub
ject
Mat
ter“The hyperdrive is broken.”
DifficultEasy Medium
1. S
ub
ject
Mat
ter
“The rebels got away.”
1
Subject Matter
2
PersonalityTypes
2. P
ers
on
alit
y Ty
pe
s
PowerDriven
2. P
ers
on
alit
y Ty
pe
s
PowerDriven
IntimacyDriven
2. P
ers
on
alit
y Ty
pe
s
PowerDriven
IntimacyDriven
FunDriven2. P
ers
on
alit
y Ty
pe
s
PowerDriven
IntimacyDriven
FunDriven
PeaceDriven2.
Pe
rso
nal
ity
Typ
es
PowerDriven
IntimacyDriven
FunDriven
PeaceDriven2.
Pe
rso
nal
ity
Typ
es
Which personality are YOU?
1 2
PersonalityTypes
Subject Matter
3
Relationship Status
3. R
ela
tio
nsh
ip S
tatu
sAre they a stranger?
3. R
ela
tio
nsh
ip S
tatu
sAre they your peer?
3. R
ela
tio
nsh
ip S
tatu
s
Are they friend or family?
3. R
ela
tio
nsh
ip S
tatu
s
Are they your employee or employer?
Sometimes, YOU are the problem.
What causes them?
Why are they so difficult?
Why do we avoid them?
Avoidance is NOT a Strategy
What causes them?
Why are they so difficult?
Why do we avoid them?
How do they escalate?
What causes them?
Why are they so difficult?
Why do we avoid them?
How do they escalate?
Misunderstanding or Disagreement
Why are they so difficult?
Why do we avoid them?
How do they escalate?
What causes them?
Misunderstanding or Disagreement
Conflict
What causes them?
Why are they so difficult?
Why do we avoid them?
How do they escalate?
Misunderstanding or Disagreement
Conflict
Confrontational Language or Behavior
Where do they come from?
What makes them difficult?
Why do we avoid them?
How do they escalate?
Misunderstanding or Disagreement
Conflict
Confrontational Language or Behavior
Emotion
