K I M B E R L Y P I K E

Gender Communication in the Family

Introduction

Families are more than groups of related people

People are gendered within their families

Families are organized by gender

Impossible to fully study gender without family

Where we learn roles are unequal

Introduction

Importance of gender roles

Gender roles taught by families

Traditional gender roles reinforce stereotypes

Hidden role of family traditions

Role of gendered social scripts

Family as a Social Institution

The Ideal Nuclear Family

Most families do not fit this

mold

Families today are very unique and diverse

The nuclear family is elusive

Masculinity & femininity emerges in 1800s

Nuclear is not the norm

38% of all marriages end in divorce Around 75% of divorced persons remarry with a 60%

chance of divorce 50% of marriages occurring this year are expected to end

in divorce Almost 30% of homes are headed by a single adult 52% of families have no children under 18 30 % of children will live in blended families at some

point (CDC, 2005a; The International Stepfamily Association, 2006)

In most two-parent homes, both parents work outside the home (Hochschild, 2003)

Stereotypes Emerge

Masculinity, femininity, and nuclear family

Institutionalized in the 1950s

Role of the media and economic growth

Spread of this ideal outside the U.S.

Interlocking Institutions

Institutions Coexist

Family affects, and is affected by, other institutions

Nuclear ideal pushed by politicians and congress

Idea of “Family Values”

Heterosexual privilege

How Work Affects Family

Imbalance in housework distribution

The “second shift”

Division of labor in same-sex couples

“Compulsory heterosexuality”

Family Constructs (and Constrains) Gender

Research on the Nuclear Family

Research affected by ideology

Unequal levels of housework deemed normal

“His vs. her marriage”

Parent-Child Communication

Parental modeling

The power of observation

Influence of parent/child interaction

Is gender teaching conscious?

Social accountability

Parent-Child Communication

Militant Motherhood

Children actively create gender

Gender Schema Theory

Adult Friends and Lovers

Heteronormativity

Devaluing of friendships

The Two-Culture Theory

Influence of the normative ideal

Dating Relationships

Gender Role Scripts

Deviating From the Norms

Do we really express intimacy that differently?

Marital Communication

Popular Research Topic

Demand/Withdrawal Pattern

Two-culture theory

Power perspective

Domestic Violence

Not all conflicts are bad for relationships

Family maintains gender inequalities and violence Every instance is unique

CCV- Common couple violence

Facts on Domestic Violence in the U.S.

4 children die in the U.S. everyday from abuse and neglect in the family

4 women are murdered in the U.S. daily by boyfriends or husbands

Women are 10 times more likely to be victims of domestic violence than are men

4+ million children in the U.S. are abused or neglected by family members annually

16% of men and 27% of women were victimized as children

25% of women have been physically assaulted or raped by an intimate partner, both in the U.S. and around the world

Domestic Violence

What types of men abuse?

How do gender expectations play a role?

How family hides abuse

Sex differences in violence

Emancipatory Families

Emancipatory Families

Why do they matter?

Society’s ideals of fatherhood

Benefits of engaged fatherhood

Lack of research on fathers

Emancipatory Families

Diverse fathers

Violence vs. nurture

Homosexual fathers

Conclusion

Families are diverse, so is their communication

The “Ideal” is not the norm

The ideal perpetuates inequalities in communication, role expectations, and violence between the sexes

Breaking from the ideal is how we improve