K II - Conversations with a Ghost - Samtaler med et spøgelse

7/25/2019 K II - Conversations with a Ghost - Samtaler med et spgelse

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KI I

haibun / haibun

Johannes S. H. Bjerg 2015

or: Conversations with a Ghosteller: Samtaler med et spgelse


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K. II is a collection of haibunK. I er en samling af haibun. 2015 Johannes S. H. Bjerg

Other books by the author:

Penguins/Pingviner

Parallels/ParalellerThreads/Trde

The Paper Bell Lessons/Papirklokkebelringerne

Notes 10 11 -12/Noter 10 11 -12

Like a Plane/Some et y

Noahs Eggs / Noahs g

Sunday Afternoon/Sndag eftermiddag

23.45

moon/mne

BeatitudesSaligprisninger

K.I


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KI I

haibun / haibun

Johannes S. H. Bjerg 2015

or: Conversations with a Ghosteller: Samtaler med et spgelse


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Stung

Ach Mensch, yes we spoke a lot of German in my time, poets and phi-losophers sure are an immature bunch! says K. and logs o Facebook.What do you mean?They think the world starts and ends with their personal squabbles andtry to generalize their suerings as if it concerned the world. They stare attheir navel and think its a model for the entire human race. Well, it isnt!

Trust me! Like:

watch me hurt see me irt

with deathThats something only adolescents do. It doesnt make good poetry orgood philosophy.

Well, Im sure theyre not all like that, I say while I try to do taxidermyon an apple, but it comes out really odd looking. Not like an apple at all.The coarse lling from a very old (and bumpy) maress obviously isntsuited for this kind of work. K. sees it and drops his head on the oorfrom laughing.

blind moon

I lose another staring contest


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Fyld

Ach Mensch, ja, vi talte meget tysk i min tid, digtere og losoer er san-delig et umodent folkefrd! siger K. og logger af Facebook.Hvad mener Du?De tror, at verden begunder og ender med deres personlige besvr-ligheder, og s prver de, at generalisere deres lidelser, som gjaldt de forhele verden. De stirrer p deres navle og tror, at den er modellen for hele

den menneskelige race. N. men det er den alts ikke! Tro mig! Lissom:

se mig lide se mig irte med dden

Det er kun noget, teenagere gr. Det bliver ikke automatisk god poesieller god loso.

Jeg tor nu ikke, at de alle sammen er sdan, siger jeg, mens jeg prverat udstoppe et ble, men det ender med at se ret underligt ud. Det lig-ner slet ikke et ble. Det grove fyld fra en gammel (og bulet) madras erbenbart ikke egnet til den slags arbejder. K. ser det og taber sit hoved pgulvet af grin.

blind mne

jeg taber endnu en stirrekonkurrence


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Afternoon Walk

We walk along the re-lled lake.A perfect allegory, says K. Filling up a hole by not trying to prevent itfrom being lled.A allegory for what?Still have to work that out.He wipes bird shit from his yellow silken top hat.

by convention linear time is a dart


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En eftermiddagstur

Vi gr langs den genopfyldte s.En perfekt allegori, siger K. At fylde et hul ved netop ikke at prve pdet.En allegori p hvad?Det arbejder jeg stadig p.Han trrer en fuglelort af sin hje gule silkehat.

pr. konvention liner tid er en pil


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Path of Recognizance

The mind is really just a scanner and storage facility the Universe usesto become aware of itself, says K. and looks exceedingly proud of beingable to say something deep.Yes, and now it has seen the garbage you havent put out.He lights one of the Sumatran cigarillos. Theyre still old. We should getsome new ones. The Universe has a nose too, you know.

Then you go ask the Universe for money.Youre such a bore, he replies and texts King Midas.

theta waves I wave back


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Erkendelsens vej

Sindet er egentlig blot en scanner og opbevaringsmekanisme, Universetbruger for at blive bevidst om sig selv, siger K. og ser overdreven stoltud over, at vre istand til, at sige noget dybsindigt.Ja, og nu har det set det aald, du ikke har bret ned.Han tnder en af de cigarillos fra Sumatra. De er stadig gamle. Vi skulleanskae os nogle nye. Universet har ogs en nse, at du vd det.

S kan du jo henvende dig til Universet og f nogle penge.Du er eddermaneme kedelig, svarer han og sender en sms til KongMidas.

thetablger frem og tilbage


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Almost Danish

We watch a famous foreign actor with Danish roots making a speech inDanish on a national award show for lm and theatre.Hes not very good at it, is he? Speaking Danish, I mean, for a Dane ...K. notices while scraping the chocolate cream o the double-layered bis-cuits using his unfashionably long (and death green, almost black; black-green with a hint of yellow) nail of his lile nger (on the right hand,

if anyone should be interested). In the 80s (I think) those nails were lamode among yuppies signalling a use (or abuse) of cocaine.Hes not a Danish Dane but he has Danish ancestors. Hes usually verygood at languages. I recently watched him in a Spanish lm speakingSpanish uently ...Do you speak Spanish?No ...Then, how can you tell his Spanish was uent?

He can speak Elvish too and all the tongues of Middle Earth ...

K. doesnt even look at me but snis up the chocolate cream from hisngernail and changes into a Jivaro Indian. Hell have my head any timenow.

500 years later Gods nger re-coloured


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Nsten dansk

Vi ser p, mens en udenlandsk skuespiller med danske rdder holder entale p dansk ved en national prisoverrkkelse for lm- og teaterfolk.Han er ikke specielt god til det, er han? At tale dansk; jeg mener, somdansker ... bemrker K., mens han skraber chokoladen af chokoladekik-sene med sin hjst umoderne lange (og dds-grnne, nsten sorte;sort-grn med et strejf af gult) lillengernegl (dn p den hjre hnd, hvis

nogen sku vre interesserede). I 80erne (tror jeg nok) var den slags neglea la mode blandt yuppier, der ville signalere, at de havde havde rd til at(mis)bruge kokain.Han er ikke dansker, men han har danske aner. Han er ellers ret god tilsprog. For nylig s jeg en lm, hvor han talte ydende spansk ...Kan du tale spansk?Neh ...Hvordan vd du s, at hans spanske var ydende?

Han kan ogs tale elversprog og alle Midgrds tungeml ...

K. ser ikke p mig, men snier chokoladecremen op fra den lange n-gernegl og forvandler sig til en Ivaro indianer. Nr som helst kan han tagemit hoved.

500 r senere genfarves Guds nger


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Angry Bird

Thats it: we get smarter but not wiser.K. shivers as he watches the news. Then he slips into my smartphone and

becomes an Angry Bird.

starving millions then we send a transistor radio to Mars


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Angry Bird

Sdan er det: vi bliver dygtigere men ikke klogere.K. ryster, da han ser nyhederne. S smuer han ind i min smartphone og

blir en Angry Bird.

sultende millioner s sender vi en transistorradio til Mars


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Appearances

I havent slept a wink. I watched boat after boat seing o towardsDreamland but couldnt get on one myself, K. says.Poetic. Must be the moon.Nah, I guess its the change of place.And not because you gulped down a pot of coee late last night after thetwo murder stories we watched?

Denitely not. And what is with these Saturday evening murder thingsanyway?Fictional death and mayhem is prey much entertainment these days.Yeah Come to think of it, the boatman looked a lot like Charon ...K. pours a triple espresso.

Nordic twilight

with a lile eort winter could be pretence


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Som tingene ser ud

Har ikke lukket et je. Jeg s bd efter bd tage af sted mod Drmme-land, men kunne ikke selv komme p n, siger K.Poetisk. Det m vre mnen.Neh, jeg tror, det m vre dee ny sted.Og ikke fordi du hldte en kande kae i dig i aftes efter de to krimier vis?

Absolut ikke. Og hvad er det med de dr lrdagaftensmord i det heletaget?Fiktive mord og delggelser er stort set underholdning nu om dage.Jep Nu hvor jeg tnker over det, lignede bdsmanden Charon tem-melig meget ...K. hlder en tredobbelt espresso op.

nordisk tusmrke med lidt anstrengelse ku vinteren blive indbildning


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Choice

Dont mind me. Im not really here, says K.Doesnt that depend on the concept of reality? You said the same thingabout the laundry you didnt want to do and its still here.Smartass. K. picks his nose and studies what comes out with admirableconcentration. Ah, bits of Limbo Candy Land, he says and eats it.

Ash Wednesday a spiders husk among the apples


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Valg

Tag dig ikke af mig. Jeg er her i virkelighed ikke, siger K.Anger det ikke af opfaelsen af virkelighed? Du sagde det sammeom det vasketj, du ikke ville tage dig af, og det er der stadig.Du en rigtig Karl Smart, hva? K. piller nse og studerer med beun-dringsvrdig koncentration dt, der kommer ud. Ah, krummer fraLimbo Slikland, siger han og spiser det.

Askeonsdag en edderkops hud mellem blerne


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The Big Book of Danish Birds

Dont open it! Put it back!K. has taken down the Big Book of Danish Birds. He doesnt listen andopens it and out ies all the black species of native birds: ravens, blackcrows, jackdaws, rooks, swallows, blackbirds of course and some otherkinds I dont know the names of. They uer around in the living roommaking a hell of a noise - except the blackbirds that begin the overture

from The Magic Flute. Books are being torn down from the shelves, cupsand things on the table tip over and there are feathers all over the place.

Now look what youve done! I yell. You clean up that mess. And shutthe damn book, will you!Cool down, man. Theyre only birds.Yes, and birds shit!Ah yes, theres that ...

I decide to hide the Big Book of Dinosaurs.

sleepless I go through already dreamt dreams


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Den Store Bog om Danske Fugle

Lad vre med at bne den! St den tilbage!K. har taget Den Store Bog om Danske Fugle ned. Han lyer ikke ogbner den, og ud yver alle de sorte arter af hjemlige fugle: ravne, sortekrager, alliker, rger, svaler, solsorte selvflgelig og andre arter, jeg ikkekender navnene p. De akser rundt i stuen og laver en helvedes larm -

bortset fra solsortene, som begynder p ouverturen til Tryllejten. Bger

rages ned af hylder, kopper og ting p bordet vlter, og der er er overdet hele.

Se nu, hvad du har gjort! rber jeg. Det her rod m du rydde op i. Ogluk s den den forbandede bog!Slap af, mand. Det kun fugle.Og fugle skider!Neh ja, der er lige dt ...

Jeg besluer mig for at gemme Den Store Bog om Dinosaurer.

svnls jeg gennemgr allerede drmte drmme


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Limbo

Im bored, says K.Well, you know what they say: intelligent people are never bored.Rubbish. Intelligent people are bored when theres nothing to do exceptwatching stupid TV.Turn if o then. Read something, write something. Or even beer: do thedishes.

I know! Ill go make some crop circles! Thats fun.Its October, you moron.Mud circles it is, then.

high humidity fruit drops merge to form a new planet


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Limbo

Jeg keder mig, siger K.Du vd, hvad man siger: kloge mennesker keder sig ikke.Vrvl. Kloge mennesker keder sig, nr der ikke er andet at lave, end atglo p noget ndssvagt TV.S sluk, mand. Ls noget, skriv noget. Eller endnu bedre: tag opvasken.Nu vd jeg det! Jeg gr ud og laver nogle korncirkler! Det er morsomt!

Det oktober, grdhoved!S m det blive muddercirkler.

hj fugtighed bolsjer smelter sammen til en ny planet


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Caught

How vulgar!K. pokes the amaryllis ower with his walking stick.Like a whores youknowwhat.Ah, so you do know about that?K. leaves.

over the meat counter punk turned muzak


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Fanget

Hvor vulgr!K. prikker til amaryllissen med sin stok.Som en hores duvednok.N, s du kender til den slags?K. skrider.

over kddisken punk der blev til muzak


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Ch-ch-ch-changes

Why do you live so far away?Well, things just turned out that way.I miss my streets.You can always take the train in.Dead people dont need trains. We can appear more or less where wewant to be.

Then why dont you zap o to your streets.Its not the same. Theyre not the same, and neither am I for that maer.I wouldnt know about the streets but I guess dying does something toyou.You betcha! K. covers his mouth quickly. Ooh, that was rather vulgar.Pardon, monsieur, je suis trs desole.Its quite odd watching a deceased grow paler.

always measured against the impossible cornower


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F-f-f-forandringer

Hvorfor bor du s langt vk?Sdan blev det bare.Jeg savner mine gader.Du kan da bare tage toget ind.Dde mennesker har brug for toge. Vi kan mere eller mindre poppe op,hvor vi vil.

Hvorfor popper du s ikke bare af sted til dine gader?Det er ikke det samme. De er ikke de samme, gaderne. Det er jeg hellerikke for den sags skyld.Jeg vd ikke noget om gaderne, men jeg vil tro, at dden gr noget vedeen.Det kan du bande p! K. dkker hurtigt sin mund. Uh, det var visttemmelig vulgrt. Pardon, monsieur, je suis trs desole.Det er ret underligt at se en afdd blive blegere.

altid mlt mod det umulige kornblomst


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Coat

You could probably weave a coat from these.K. holds a handful of gulls cries.But theyre not songs, he agrees.

autumn gale

leaves leave the maple outside


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Frakke

Man ku sikkert vve en frakke af disse.K. holder en hndfuld mgeskrig.Men de er ikke sange, er han enig i.

efterrskuling

blade forlader ahorntret udenfor


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Predictable Cocoons

Theyre like cocoons, K. says and points to the pile of unopened enve-lopes, some of them turning yellow-ish with age. Whats in them?Haiku journals, I reply.Why havent you opened them, then? I mean, you like haiku, you writehaiku. Arent you curious?Nah, I already know whats in them. The excitement kinda dwindles

when you know what kind of mariposa (I try to pronounce it in Spanish)will come out of a specic kind of cocoon. It would be far more fun if itwas a pterodactyl or a hookah smoking dwarf that came out, but I havegiven up hoping for that.Maybe I can help you. K. turns himself into a pink unicorn and does aFred Astaire dance. Now I just need to nd my Ginger.

this way that way the indecisive wind


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Forudsigelige kokoner

De er ligesom kokoner, siger K. og peger p bunken af ubnede ku-verter. Nogle af dem er ved at blive en smule gullige af alder. Hvad erder i dem?Haiku-tidsskrifter, svarer jeg.Hvorfor har du ikke s ikke bnet dem? Jeg mener, du kan godt lidehaiku, du skriver haiku. Er du ikke nysgerrig?

Neh, jeg vd allerede, hvad der er i dem. Spndingen aftager ensmule, nr man ved hvilken slags mariposa (jeg forsger at sige det pspansk), der vil komme ud af bestemte kokoner. Det ville vre langtsjovere, hvis det var en pterodactyl eller en vandpiberygende dvrg, derkom ud, men jeg har opgivet at hbe p dt.Mske kan jeg hjlpe dig. K. forvandler sig selv til en lyserd enhjrn-ing og danser en Fred Astaire-dans. Nu skal jeg bare lige nde Ginger.

den vej den anden vej den ubeslutsomme vind


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Devolution

The ones with whom he talks about divine maers cannot follow his trainof thought.. He buys a gun to be understood. K.s a most accommodatingman.

darkness

how the absence of light becomes a chemical


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De-evolution

Dem med hvem han taler om guddommelige sager kan ikke flge hanstankespor. Han kber en pistol for at gre sig forstelig. K. er en megetimdekommende mand.

mrke

som fravret af lys blir til et kemikalie


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Endings

I come home to nd K. ripping the last pages out of my books.I hate endings! I cant stand so-called conclusions. Theyre fake. Nothingends. Ever!You should know, I say. Youre the dead one.

only there when it moves the wind

I just discovered my phobia, says K. and folds The Apocalypse into hatsfor his hoard of hamsters.But that book says something about a new beginning.Bah, everything will turn out the same again eventually.

still in my bones supernovae from deep time


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Slutninger

Jeg kommer hjem og ser K. rive de bagerste sider ud af mine bger.Jeg hader slutninger! Jeg kan ikke tage skaldte konklusioner. De erfalske. Ingenting ender. Aldrig!Du burde vide det, siger jeg. Det er dig, der er den dde.

kun dr nr den bevger sig vinden

Jeg har lige opdaget min fobi, siger K. og folder sm hae af Johannesbenbaring til sin hamsterok.Men den dr bog siger noget om en ny begyndelse.Sludder, med tiden vil alt blive som det var fr.

stadig i mine knogler supernovaer fra den dybe tid


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Breath of Death

A y lands on my hand. I blow it away and it drops dead on CesarVallejos Collected Poems.Ah, I see youre learning, grins K. and bares his greenish-yellow-blackteeth; those he has left.Its a coincidence, I say and blow into my cupped hand trying to smellmy own breath. His 20-days-of-life-clock ran out just as I blew.

Yea, yea, yea. Its creepy how his laughter seems to come from a deepmineshaft ...

washing oors what I left of footprints I take back


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Ddens nde

En ue lander p min hnd. Jeg puster den vk, og den falder dd om pCesar Vallejos Samlede Digte.Ah, jeg kan se, at du er ved at komme efter det, griner K. og bloer sinegrnligt-gule-sorte tnder; dem han har tilbage.Det er ren og skr tilfldighed, siger jeg og puster ind i min huledehnd for at prve, at dufte til min egen nde. Hans 20-dages-livsur lb

ud, lige da jeg pustede.Ja, ja, ja. Det uhyggeligt, sdan som hans laer synes at komme fra endyb mineskakt ...

gulvvask hvad jeg efterlod af fodspor tager jeg tilbage


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Full Sun

What happened to that follow-Christ-whatever-it-takes thing?He went to a Jimi Hendrix concert.K. covers his ears demonstratively.

full sun

but no poet swoons over that


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Fuldsol

Hvad skete der med den dr flg-Kristus-ligemeget-hvad ting?Han tog til en Jimi Hendrix koncert.K. holder sig demonstrativt for rerne.

fuldsol

men ingen digter dner over dt


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Holi

No one remembers me. K. sighs so deep that the last life in the hya-cinths evaporates and they turn yellow and wither in a second.Thats not true. Many people remember you. Your work is studied bymany clever heads and discussed in the high halls of knowledge.Bah! Remember I was long dead before they were born. How can theyknow me then? Im much more than than my work. Those four-eyed

geeks all live in their heads. Like I did. Do not do as I do, do as I say or whatever. My work is not me. Its only a sheen, the tip of the iceberg.Or was ... Remember that song:

Even the birds when they singIts not everything to them

and

Music is so much lessthan what you are

Ah yes. Incredible String Band. But they were newly converts back then.They turned to Scientology.Ach Scheisse! What a bummer!

K. decides hes a kitchen knife and terrorises an apple.

rst dream and theres a Holi celebration on the TV too


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Holi

Ingen husker mig. K. sukker s dybt, at det sidste liv i hyacinterne for-damper, og de bliver gule og visner p et sekund.Det er ikke rigtigt. Der er mange, der husker dig. Der er mange klogehoveder, der studerer dine vrker , og de bliver diskuteret i lrdommenshje sale.Bah! Husk p, at jeg havde vret dd lnge fr, de blev fdt. Hvordan

kan de s kende mig? Jeg er meget mere end mit vrk. De brilleaber leverkun i deres hoveder. Ligesom jeg gjorde. Du skal ikke gre, som jeg gr.Du skal gre, som jeg siger ... eller hvordan det nu er. Mit arbejde er ikkemig. Det er kun en afglans, toppen af isbjerget. Eller var Tnk p dendr sang:

Even the birds when they singIts not everything to them

og

Music is so much lessthan what you are

h ja. Incredible String Band. Men de var nye konvertier p det tids-punkt. De havde tilsuet sig Scientology.

Ach Scheisse! Nedtur.

K. besluer sig for at vre en kkkenkniv og terroriserer et ble.

frste drm og er der ogs en Holi-fest p erneren


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Horrorscope

Horrorscope? You mean horo-scope, dont you?Knowing my luck ...K. decides hes no longer a beetle but a rhino. Who can blame him?

requiescat in pace

a y danglesin a spiderless web


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Horrorskop

Horrorskop? Du mener horo-skop, gr du ikk?Med mit held ...K. besluer, at han ikke lngere er en bille, men et nsehorn. Det kanman ikke bebrejde ham.

requiescat in pace

en ue dingler i et edderkoppelst spindelvv


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Indians

Have the Indians come to Denmark?No, theyre still in America. Or whats left of them.Then, what are those drums I can hear?Ah, it just young men in cars and their gigantic speakers. They play loudmusic while driving around.Why?

Theyre bored, I guess. Its their idea of fun.Strange. K. pauses a bit. Can we go out and shoot them?No, I dont think its legal.Buggers.

K. does a few les Lanciers moves with his right leg. Sometimes he doeslook like a horse.

Saturday evening killing time isnt really killing


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Indianere

Er indianerne kommet til Danmark?Nej, de er stadig i Amerika. Eller, dem der er tilbage.Hvad er det s for nogle trommer, jeg kan hre?h, det er bare unge mnd og deres gigantiske hjalere. De spiller hjmusik, mens de krer rundt.Hvorfor?

De keder sig, vil jeg tro. Det er sdan, de har det sjovt.Mrkeligt. Kan vi g ud og skyde dem?Nej, jeg tror ikke, det er lovligt.Pokkers.

K. lave nogle lanciers-bevgelser med sit hjre ben. Nogle gange lignerhan alts en hest.

lrdag aften slr tiden ihjel uden rigtig at drbe


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A Meeting

K. meets K. in the kitchen.Ah, youre Jewish? says K.And youre still a virgin, K. replies.Obviously you see things more clearly when youre dead.

elevated in its abandonment the church on the hill


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Et mde

K. mder K. i kkkenet.h, du er jdisk? siger K.Og du er stadig jomfru, svarer K.Tydeligvis ser man mere klart, nr man er dd.

ophjet i sin forladthed kirken p hjen


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Limbo

In Limbo theres a room for this, says K. staring vacantly out the win-dow.For what?Endless Sunday rain.

returning to their skeleton colours maple leaves


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Limbo

I Limbo har de et vrelse for det dr, siger K. og stirrer tomt ud ad vin-duet.For hvad?Evindelig sndagsregn.

vender tilbage til deres skeletfarver arhornblade


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Eternal?

Its an obsession and a pathological one at that, I say reading aboutthe new kind of watches that can measure your pulse, BP, the amountof saturated fat in your blood, your brainwaves, the speed of growth ofyour nails and your hair and upload those numbers onto a social mediaplatform of your choice.Thats nothing, says K. Try spending time with Qin Shi Huang. Even

in the afterlife hes eating mercury tablets, doing internal triathlons (yes,its another kind) and what have you. He cannot talk about anything else not that theres much to talk about over there anyway. Things thatmeant a lot to you when you were alive seem rather unimportant onceyoure dead.

down to earth rain

K. breaks my thermometer and gulps down the mercury.Cheers, and heres to a long ah, what the heck.


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Evig?

Det en beselse og en sygelig n af slagsen. siger jeg, da jeg lser omen ny slags armbndsur, der kan mle eens puls, BT, mngden af metfedt i blodet, hjerneblger, farten hvormed hr og negle vokser og up-loade tallene til et socialt medie efter eget valg.Det da ingenting, siger K. Du sku prve at tilbringe tid med Qin ShiHuang. Selv i dden spiser han kvikslvstableer og dyrker intern triat-

lon (ja, det er en anden slags) og hvad ved jeg. Han taler ikke om andet ikke, at der er meget at tale om der ovre. Ting, der betd meget for een,da man levede, synes temmelig uvsentlige, nr man er dd.

ned p jorden regn

K. knkker mit termometer og sluger kvikslvet.Skl for et langt rh, hva pokker.


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Parrot

Have you noticed they keep saying the same thing over and over?Theyre gulls. They dont have much to talk about.Mh, you maybe right, but it cant be very satisfying ...K. turns himself into a parrot and squawks La Marseillaise.

well into winter no snowmen have appeared in public


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Papegje

Har du lagt mrke til, at de siger det samme igen og igen?De er mger. De har ikke meget at tale om.Mh, mske har du ret, men det kan ikke vre srlig tilfredsstillende ...K. forvandler sig til en papegje og skrpper Marseillaisen.

godt inde i vinteren ingen snemnd har vist sig oentligt


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Misanthropy

Why did you come back?I needed a place to cultivate my misanthropy. Thats prey much impos-sible when youre emerged in absolute love, says K. and ings a bogeyacross the room.

in a reconstructed ear Ms reconstructed requiem


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Misantropi

Hvorfor kom du tilbage?Jeg havde brug for et sted til at kultivere min misantropi. Det er prak-tisk taget umuligt, nr du er neddykket i absolut krlighed, siger K. ogskyder en bussemand tvrs gennem stuen.

i et rekonstrueret re Ms rekonstruerede requiem


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All at Once

Never mind the world. The rst place you get lost is in yourself.K.s head looks scary with those insect eyes.O.k. Ill go to the shops AGAIN!

somewhere in Mongolia the tuning of a piano


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55

Alt p n gang

Det lige meget med verden. Det frste sted du farer vild er i dig selv.K.s hoved ser skrmmende ud med de dr insektjne.O.k. S gr JEG ud og kber ind IGEN!

et sted i Mongoliet et klaver der stemmes


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56

In the Meantime

Did it start o as a lump on Earth? A lump that eventually got hurled ointo space by all that spinning? Its ridiculous!! The moon stays where themoon is!But they put mirrors on the moon and by pointing laser light at them wecan measure how far away it is at any given time, thus we know its drift-ing o into space at the same speed human ngernails grow.

K. looks at his (still unfashionably) long nail on his right pinky.Rubbish! How can you do that with mirrors? When I look in a mirror Isee nothing!I keep quiet. I know hes not happy with his mirrored image. It shows askull crawling with beetles and worms and considering his overall vanityCheer up. It wont disappear in our lifetime ...

Sometimes I wish I could bite my tongue o.

hardly here when it is daylight


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I mellemtiden

Begyndte den som en klump p Jorden? En klump, der med tiden blevslynget ud i rummet p grund af al den dr rotation? Laerligt! Mnenforbliver hvor mnen er!Men man har sat spejle p mnen, og nr man lyser p dem laserlys,kan man mle, hvor langt vk den er til hver en tid, og sdan vd vi, atden driver ud i rummet med samme hastighed, som et menneskes negle

gror.K. studerer sin (stadig umoderne) lange lillengernegl.Sludder! Hvordan sku man ku gre sdan noget med spejle? Nr jegkigger i et spejl, ser jeg ingenting.

Jeg tier. Jeg vd, at han ikke er glad for sit spejlbillede. Det viser et kranie,hvor biller og orme kravler rundt, og hans forfngelighed taget i betragt-ning Slap af. Den vil ikke forsvinde i vores levetid ...

Mig og min store mund.

knap nok her nr det er dagslys


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Music

Music has power. Music can do a lot. Music can colour anything you seeand smell. Music can bind to memories of all kinds.

I get intrigued by a movie but a few minutes in, it uses a song I absolutelycannot take by a singer that makes my stomach turn. I know, its meant tounderline the deep emotions of the scene but its like eating honey and

candy-oss at the same time.

Youre such a purist, says K.No, Im just tired of all that pouring out my aching heart stu, I reply.Im not stupid. I fully get the pain of the scene even though the actorshave had so many face-jobs they hardly have any expressions left.O.k. Youre a cynic then, he says puing a string in one ear and drag-ging it out the other. Then he uses that sticky thing to catch dust bunnies

behind the radiator.Look! A dead spider!

post Easter the cold bumblebee I thought was dead

takes ight after a warm up


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Musik

Musik har kraft. Musik kan gre en masse. Musik kan farve alt, man serog lugter. Musik kan binde sig til alle slags erindringer.

Jeg bliver fanget af en lm, men f minuer inde bruger den en sang,jeg simpelthen ikke kan snuppe med en sanger, der fr min mave til atkrympe sig sammen i kramper. Jeg vd, at det er meningen, at den skal

understrege de dybe flelser i scenen, men det er som at spise honningog candyoss p n gang.

Du er sdan en puritaner, siger K.Nej, jeg er blot trt af alt det dr udser mit hjerte lort, svarer jeg.Jeg er ikke dum. Jeg forstr fuldt ud smerten i scenen, selvom skuespill-erne har fet s mange face-jobs, at de knap nok har nogen som helstudtryk tilbage.

O.k. S er du en kyniker, siger han og puer en snor ind i det ene reog ud af det andet. Derefter bruger han den klistrede trd til at fange etpar nullermnd bag radiatoren.Se! En dd edderkop!

efter pske

den kolde brumbasse jeg troede var dd yver videre efter en opvarming


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60

Order and Chaos

So, now entropy has been stopped; or at least halted for a while. Nagel-far wont dock here any time soon. Gleipner, the rope dwarfs made fromthe spit of birds to tie down the Fenris Wolf, is holding. Chaos is prevent-ed, says K. in a self righteous tone.Come o it. You only did the washing up. Itll be back, dont worry.Oh, this Sisyphean life.

K. looks silly in his owery apron.

a bit longer than my granddads my shadow at noon


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Orden og kaos

S, nu er entropien stoppet; eller den gr lidt langsommere nu. Nagelfarvil ikke lgge til sdan lige med det samme. Gleipner, rebet, som blevspundet af fuglespyt af dvrge for at binde Fenrisulven, holder. Kaos er

blevet forhindret, siger K. i en selvretfrdig tone.Slap af. Du tog kun opvasken. Den vil vende tilbage, kan du roligt regnemed.

h, dee liv plaget af sisyfosarbejde.K. ser ollet ud i sit blomstrede forklde.

en smule lngere end min farfars min skygge ved middag


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62

Paranoia

K. has discovered tinfoil. He has made a turban and wears it as protec-tion.Now they cant manipulate my thoughts.Who?Those blue men there, he says and points.Theyre garbage men.

He suggests we use the electric toothbrushes as weapons.

not weing the ocean further rain


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Paranoia

K. har opdaget slvpapir. Han har lavet en turban og brer den sombeskyelse.Nu kan de ikke manipulere med min tanker.Hvem?De dr bl mnd, siger han og peger.Det skraldemnd.

Han foreslr, vi bruger de elektriske tandbrster som vben.

gr ikke havet mere vdt regn


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64

Polish Fart

Im on a visit. The Polish lodgers boyfriends mother is making dinnerfor her son.Her cooking smells of fart, says K. as he comes out of the faucet in the

bathroom.You could have stayed at home. You didnt have to follow me here.Thats sorta the essence of being haunted, my friend.

Mh, I thought we were friends. I didnt think youd haunt me or evenwhy you would do such a thing. I have no axe to grind with you. Youredead and peace with that.

DONT SAY THAT! I hate peace! And quiet too, for that maer. Itsbooooooooring. Maybe Ill go get spooky with the lodgers boyfriendsmother. Shes a dish.Good luck. Shes Polish. She doesnt understand a word of Danish.

Buggers!

eating mile after mile of darkness the night train full of light

I can try German. I was good at German!


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Polsk prut

Jeg er p besg. Den polske lejers krestes mor laver middag til sin sn.Hendes madlavning lugter af prut, siger K., mens han kommer ud afvandhanen p toileet.Du ku bare vre blevet hjemme. Du havde ikke behvet, at flge eftermig.Det ligesom kernen i at vre hjemsgt, min ven.

Mh, jeg troede, vi var venner. Jeg troede ikke, du ville hjemsge migeller hvorfor. Jeg har ikke noget p dig. Du er dd og fred vre med det.

SIG IKKE DET! Jeg hader fred! Og osse ro, for den sags skyld. Det er ke-de-ligt. Mske skulle jeg blive lidt uhyggelig med lejerens krestes mor.Hun er en rap sag.Held og lykke. Hun er polsk. Hun forstr ikke et ord dansk.Satans!

der sig gennem mrket naoget fuldt af lys

Jeg ku prve p tysk. Jeg var god til tysk!


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Pasta Con Broccoli

Wow, theres really a lot of odd energy waves in space! K. is watchinga TV show about the various kinds of radiation the sun and other starsemit. Its actually a scary place out there.Yep. Just consider yourself blessed by living on a planet with a magneto-sphere.Living!?!? K. hands me his portfolio of obits and shows me a photo

of his grave. Do you think we could cook the pasta con broccoli by thebackground radiation only?

only in a Goldilock zone a broom becomes a guitar


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Pasta con broccoli

Wow, der er virkelig en masse under energiblger i rummet! K. ser enudsendelse om de forskellige former for strler, solen og andre stjernerafgiver. Det faktisk et skrmmende sted dt derude.Jep! Du kan regne dig selv for en heldig kartoel, at du lever p enplanet med en magnetosfre.Lever!?!?! K. rkker mig sin portfolio af ddsannoncer og viser mig et

billede af sin grav. Tror du, vi ku koge pasta med broccoli udelukkendeved at bruge baggrundsstrlingen?

kun i en Goldilock zone bliver en kost til en guitar


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Revision

I had this dream that I was going around making all those people whocalled themselves dreamers vanish in quite beastly ways. I woke up

bathed in cold sweat and my heart was racing like Genghis Khans horsesstorming across the endless Mongolian steppes.Were your means of disposal that horrid? Maybe he had a softer heartthan he let on.

No, I think I missed some.

K. adds a few notes to The Concept of Anxiety.

faraway sub-woofers Saturday evening takes a lot of wa


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Revision

Jeg drmte, at jeg gik rundt og k alle de folk, der kalder sig drmmeretil at forsvinde p ganske bestialske mder. Jeg vgnede i koldsved,og mit hjerte hamrede derud af som Djengis Khans heste, der j over demongolske stepper.Var dine forsvindingsmetoder s grusomme? Mske var han bldereom hjertet, end han lod som om.

Nej, jeg tror, jeg missede nogle.

K. fjer et par noter til Begrebet Angest.

sub-woofere i det erne lrdag aften krver en masse wa


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Triviathletes

67P/Churyumov-Gerasimenko, thats a grand name for a piece of com-pressed space dust.As good a name as Eberhard, Id say. Im not sure we have namesenough for every object in space.Naw, I guess youre right.K. ips a bogey out the window. Again.

There goes Xiclip 89/F.

listening to Saturnmy room on a pin-head

lls with moths


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Triviatleter

67P/Churyumov-Gerasimenko, det er et storslet navn for en klumpsammenpresset rumstv.Lige s godt et navn som Eberhard, sku jeg mene. Jeg er ikke sikker p,vi har nok navne til alle objekter i rummet.Neh, du har nok ret.K. skyder en bussemand ud ad vinduet. Igen.

Der yver Xiclip 89/F.

lyer til Saturn mit vrelse p et nlehovede fyldes med natsvrmere


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72

Snow

Four days of snow after Christmas. Is that really it?Dont start that when I was alive there were winters where you couldwalk to Sweden shit.What on Earth would I do in Sweden?K. turns the Nativity display into The Adoration of the Ninja Turtles.

on the old yellow new white


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73

Sne

Fire dage med sne efter jul. Er det virkelig dt?Nu skal du ikke begynde p det dr da jeg var i live, var der vintre,hvor man kunne g til Sverige lort.Hvad i alverden skulle jeg foretage mig i Sverige?K. forvandler Julekrybben til Ninja Turtelsernes tilbedelse.

p den gamle gule den nye hvide


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74

Beetles

Forgive me if I doubt in our ability to forgive.You should rephrase that.Youre right.K. prepares a speech for beetles.

original sin just enough ag to cover a con


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Biller

Tilgiv mig, hvis jeg tvivler p vor evne til at tilgive.Mske sku du omformulere dt?Du har ret.K. forbereder en tale til biller.

arvesynd akkurat ag nok til at dkke en kiste


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76

Limbo (again)

Im tired.Man, youve just slept for 90 years!Slept! You dont know what youre talking about. The Trial is nothingcompared to Limbo, says the other K.Limbo?! Thats a dance, aint it?He materialises an anvil and throws it at me.

from dawn to dusk dusk


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Limbo (igen)

Jeg er trt.Mand, du har lige sovet i 90 r!Sovet! Du aner ikke, hvad du taler om. Processen er ingenting sammen-lignet med Limbo, siger den anden K.Limbo?! Det en dans, er det ikk?Han materialiserer en ambolt og kaster den efter mig.

fra gry til skumring skumring


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Theres Always Someone Who Thinks He Suers More than You

Oh, shit. Not again! My tongue nds a tooth abscess. See!!? I try topull my cheek aside to let K. see it and pity me. I need someone to feelsorry for me. (Not that it hurts; thats the puzzling thing about gum dis-ease).That?! Thats nothing. He rips o his jaw and shows me the perpetualroing state of the unresting dead.

Man, youre so demonstrative!

sleeping in my shadow up long before me


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Der er altid nogen, der synes, at de lider mere end dig

Oh, shit. Ikke igen! Min tunge nder en tandbyld. Se!!? Jeg prver,at hive min kind tilside s K. kan se den og ha ondt af mig. Jeg har brugfor, at nogen synes, at det er synd for mig. (Ikke at det gr ond; det er detforvirrende ved paradentose).Det dr?! Det ingenting. Han river sin underkbe af og viser mig denvedvarende rdnende tilstand, de urolige dde bender sig i.

Mand, du er s demonstrativ!

sover lnge min skygge er oppe lnge fr mig


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80

Unsilent Night

Wrroommm wroom-wrooom click wrooooooooom screeeeech, crack, oh no no, BAM! and something that sounds like glasssplintering wakes me up just a moment after Ive nally fallen asleep.What the hell is that! I yell out into the dark.Oh, thats just J. D. reliving his nal moments. You know, he died in acar crash, says K.

Why the hell has he got to do it here?! I nally fell asleep, goddammit!Relax. You can sleep when youre dead.Really?No, not really.

straightly hypothetical in the rain the moon

Nobody likes me. No one has ever liked me!Ah, shut up! K. opens a tiny silver case that sucks up J. D. and nowtheres only the rain and the wind and K.


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Ustille nat

Wrroommm wroom-wrooom klik wrooooooooom screeeeech, knk, h nej nej, BAM!og noget, der lyder som glas, dersplintrer vkker mig et jeblik efter, jeg endelig er faldet i svn.Hvad fanden er dt! skriger jeg ud i mrket.Ne, det er bare J. D., der gennemlever sine sidste jeblikke. Du vd, handde i en bilulykke, siger K.

Hvorfor i alverden skal han absolut gre det her?! Jeg var endelig faldet isvn, for helvede!Slap af. Du kan sove, nr du er dd.Virkelig?Nej, egentlig ikke.

rent hypotetisk i regnen mnen

Ingen ka li mig. Ingen har nogensinde ku li mig!S hold dog kft! K. bner en lille slvske, der suger J. D. op, og nu erder kun vinden og regnen og K.


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Knowing is Knowing

I dreamed we used cucumbers for communicating with extra-terrestri-als.Thats how you can tell its a dream. Everyone knows its tomatoes thatsthe thing for that.K. dials someone on a distant planet with a pyramid of cherry tomatoes.

coming home the birch hasnt moved an inch


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At vide er at vide

Jeg drmte, at vi brugte agurker til at kommunikere med rumvsener.Det sdan, du kan vide, at det var en drm. Alle vd, at man brugertomater til den slags.K. ringer til n eller anden p en ern planet med en pyramide af cherrytomater.

hjemkomst birken har ikke yet sig en tomme


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Vigilius Haufniensis

So I ended up hating those that wouldnt agree with me or under-stand me, sighs K.Even Vigilius Haufniensis?Especially him.K. watches Hercule Poirot peal a mango.

between nights a palimpsest of lights scribbles

Vigilius Haufniensis: one of Kierkegaards pen names/alter egos


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Vigilius Haufniensis

S det endte med, at jeg hadede alle, der ikke gav mig ret eller forstodmig, sukker K.Selv Vigilius Haufniensis?Isr ham.K. ser p, at Hercule Poirot skrller en mango.

mellem ner en palimpsest af lysets skriblerier

Vigilius Haufniensis:een of Kierkegaards psedonymer/alter egoer


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86

Were-bunny

Darn wind! It goes through marrow and bone!Show o! says K. trying to do shadow gures on the wall by a singlecandle ame, but unsuccessfully.Well, at least theres one downside to being translucent.I really wish I could do a were-bunny.

now its clean now it isnt the periodic table


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Var-kanin

Forbandede vind! Den gr gennem marv og ben!Blrerv! siger K., mens han prver at lave skyggegurer p vggenved lyset af en enkelt stearinlys, men det mislykkes.N, s er der da n bagside ved at vre gennemskinnelig.Jeg ville sdan nske, jeg kunne lave en var-kanin.

nu er der orden nu er der ikke det periodiske system


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Documents

K II - Conversations with a Ghost - Samtaler med et spøgelse