The campus of Oral Roberts University is not easy to miss. Anyone who has ever been in South Tulsa will

recognize the unique, futuristic architecture and the sixty-foot-tall praying hands of the world-famous Christian col-lege.

Many of TU’s students know ORU, located at 7777 S. Lewis Ave., as our rival in basketball. However, the nature of campus life at ORU remains a mystery to many. In the spirit of discovery, myself and fellow Collegian staff writer Olivia Blankenship took the long drive into the wilds of South Tulsa to tour ORU’s campus and spoke with some of its students.

ORU was founded in 1963 and accredited by the Higher

Learning Commission in 1971. The story behind the Uni-versity’s foundation is almost more remarkable than the man who founded it.

Roberts claimed to have received a message from God telling him to found a university to further God’s work on earth. Roberts claimed that God told him, “Raise up your students to hear My voice, to go where My light is dim, where My voice is heard small, and My healing power is not known, even to the uttermost bounds of the earth. Their work will exceed yours, and in this I am well pleased.”

These words are hung in large brass letters from the bal-cony of Christ’s Chapel.

Before Oral Roberts founded the University that now bears his name, he made a name for himself as a travelling preacher, televangelist and faith healer. He was also well known for his adherence to the prosperity gospel, a belief that God wills that Christians be wealthy and prosperous.

This belief led to some accusations that Roberts was us-ing his ministry to become wealthy. Although no formal al-legations ever stuck, Roberts was known for a lavish life-style, and in 2007, his son Richard was forced to resign his position as head of ORU amidst allegations of misusing university funds after the school went into debt.

To get out of debt, the school accepted $70 million from the Green family, founders of Hobby Lobby and Mardel Christian and Education Stores, Inc., and installed a new board of directors, appointed by the Green family with Mart Green as chairman.

Our tour of ORU began in the Graduate Center, a large multi-purpose building with lounges for students, classrooms and the campus library. Students milled about, walking to and from classes. In the center of the round common area we noticed a spiral staircase leading up five

Reading PartnersReading can change a child’s life! Become a True Blue Neighbors Reading Partner at Kendall-Whittier Elementary, commit to one hour a week and a 45 minute training session and you can be the catalyst to launch a child’s education to a higher level. Time slots are still available.

Springdale ElementaryStarting November 5, 2013, from 6:00 – 7:30 p.m., Springdale Elementary School is needing volunteers to assist with child care and reading buddies during ESL and Parenting classes. This is a once a week class and runs through May.

Habitat for Humanity Habitat needs volunteers to finish up their fall builds. The shifts run from 8 a.m. – 12 p.m. or 12:30 – 4 p.m., and dates are November 9, 16, 23 & 30, December 7, 14 & 21

Lunch Room MonitorKendall-Whittier needs lunch room monitors on Fridays. This is only for 30 minutes from 10:45 – 12:45. A background check is required.

For additional information on volunteer opportunities, contact Kathy Shelton in the True Blue Neighbor Volunteer Center at kathy-shelton@utulsa.edu or call 918-631-3535.

Fraser Kastner

Olivia BlanKenshipStaff Writers

See ORU page 10

a student newspaper of the university of tulsa november 18, 2013 issue 11 ~ volume 99

So, the Mayor’s Cup got us thinking: how much do we really know about our neighbor at 81st and Lewis?

ORU’s sixty-foot statue is the largest pair of praying hands in the world. “Praying Hands” is but one of many oddities awaiting visitors to ORU’s campus.

A Hall of Mirrors, the World’s Largest Praying Hands and a Flame-Capped Tower: Getting to Know ORU

the Collegian : 218 november 2013

Here’s how to nominate a high school teacher who inspired you:

1. Nominations may be made by any undergraduate who expects to graduate in May, 2014. 2. Nominations are due by 5:00 PM on December 13, 2013 and should be sent to the Dean’s office of the College in which the graduating senior is enrolled via-email as follows: College of Arts and Sciences: Stephanie-Boulden@utulsa.edu

College of Business Administration: Chante-clarkson@utulsa.edu College of Engineering & Natural Sciences: Dottie-Smith@utulsa.edu

3. Teachers selected will receive a $2,000 award and their high schools will receive $1,000. The teachers will be recognized during the May commencement ceremony. High school teachers throughout the USA are eligible. 4. Students whose nominated teachers are selected will receive $500. 5. For more information including the nomination criteria go to the Student Affairs website: http://www.utulsa.edu/studentaffairs.

May  2014  Graduates Nominate  a  Secondary  School  Teacher

For  The  Prize  for  Inspiration

6746 S Memorial Dr, Tulsa, OK 74133(918) 459-5346

For a chance at FREE foodBELOWTHE CODESCAN

MONGOLIAN GRILL

the Collegian : 3 18 november 2013

Tulsa trampled by Herd, fans brave frigid elements

Tulsa’s misfortunes continued Thursday night as the Hurricane fell 45–34 to the Marshall Thundering Herd. The Herd jumped out to an early 21–0 lead, but Tulsa battled back, taking the lead early in the 4th quarter. Unfortunately, the defense could not hold the stampeding opposition , surrendering two touchdowns in the final four minutes of play. A combination of poor weather, a weeknight kickoff and a two-win season kept attendance down to a measly 16,000. But those willing to endure the cold made up for their lack of numbers with heightened enthusiasm. Halftime was particularly entertaining: the band performed ‘Single Ladies’ and a parade of nations circled the stadium with the flags representing the home countries of many of TU’s international students.

editor-in-chief—J.Christopher Proctor

managing editor—Kyle Walker

news editor—Conor Fellin

sports editor—Will Bramlett

variety editor—Stephanie Hice

opinion editor—Patrick Creedon

satire editor—Anna Bennett

photo & graphics editor—Jill Graves

apprentice editor—Morgan Krueger

copy editor—Carly Putnam

business & advertising manager—Liz Cohen

distribution manager—Walker Womack

web manager—Alex White

aribitrary writer of the week—Giselle Willis

The Collegian is the independent student newspaper of the University of Tulsa. It is distributed Mondays during the fall and spring semesters except during holidays and final exam weeks. The University of Tulsa does not discriminate on the basis of personal status or group characteristics including but not limited to the classes protected under federal and state law in its programs, services, aids, or benefits.

Inquiries regarding implementation of this policy may be addressed to the Office of Human Resources, 800 South Tucker Drive, Tulsa, Oklahoma 74104-9700, 918-631-2616. Requests for accommodation of disabilities may be addressed to the University’s 504 Coordinator, Dr. Tawny Taylor, 918-631-3814. To ensure availability of an interpreter, five to seven days notice is needed; 48 hours is recommended for all other accommodations. Advertising Policy: Advertising appearing in this publication does not imply approval or endorsement by the University of Tulsa or The Collegian for the products or services advertised. For advertising information, email The Collegian at collegian@utulsa.edu or elizabeth-cohen@utulsa.edu. The deadline for advertising is 12 p.m. on the Friday prior to the publication. Editing Policy: The Collegian reserves the right to edit all copy submitted by all writers. This editing may take place in many forms, including grammar corrections, changes in paragraph structure or even the addition or removal of sections of content. Editorial Policy: Columnists are solely responsible for the content of their columns. Opinions expressed in columns may not represent the opinions of the entire Collegian staff, the administrative policies of the University of Tulsa, the views of the student body or our advertisers. Letter Policy: Letters to the editor must be less than 500 words. While we do not require it, letters sent via e-mail to the Collegian are encouraged. Under no circumstances will anonymous letters be published. The name of the person submitting the letter must be published with the letter. We reserve the right to edit or reject all letters. The deadline for letters is 5 p.m. on the Saturday prior to publication.

Will Bramlett and David Kennedy / Collegian

Sports the Collegian : 418 november 2013

Andrew Wiggins, Julius Randle and Jabari Parker are the three top freshman entering NCAA Division I basketball this year. All three have expressed interest in playing for the NBA—however, because of the “one and done rule,” they are forced to spend a year playing for a college team.

The NBA enacted the rule in 2005 to in-crease “the chances that incoming players will have the requisite ability, experience, maturity and life skills,” required to play at the NBA level, according to NBA president Joel Litvin in a Congressional challenge to the rule in 2009.

There are serious problems with the rule.First of all, college isn’t for everyone.

The average salary of an NBA player is $5.15 million per year. The handful of ath-letes that go to college for a year rather than playing for the NBA directly out of high school effectively lose out on this large sum of money for the year they spend in college.

Additionally, if playing professional bas-ketball is an athlete’s career goal, then there is little or no incentive for the player to care about their classes. They know that they’re not going to get a degree, and that they are only going to school for a year because of a rule.

Second, the “one and done” rule harms colleges and institutions. Wiggins, Randle and Parker attend three of the most respect-ed basketball programs in the country (Kan-sas, Kentucky and Duke respectively). Uni-versities that attract the top picks can further

grow their programs, but this potentially harms schools that cannot. Eliminating the best-of-the-best, or “outliers,” can level the playing field for other schools.

Third, the rule harms the other players beyond those directly affected. During the past several years, college tuition has risen at record levels. Collegiate athletics and the scholarships they offer can provide excel-lent opportunities for students that other-wise would have not had an opportunity to get a degree.

The scholarships that are given to student athletes who spend a year with the program could then be given to students who don’t have a shot at the NBA—how many people really have the opportunity to make $5.15 million a year playing professional sports? Give the scholarships to students who could get an education and do something besides playing professional sports after they gradu-ate.

Finally, the age requirements to play pro-fessional basketball are unlike the major-ity of other major league sports. The NFL requires that players are at least three years removed from high school before they are eligible, increasing the incentive for players to finish their degrees.

While the average graduation time is over three years, taking an additional year or two to play college football and finish a degree is significantly less imposing than taking an additional three years of college. This is especially noteworthy because the average tenure is 3.3 years in the NFL compared to over 12 years in the NBA. Players may find it more beneficial to have a degree to get a job once their time in the NFL is up.

The MLB’s rule is a bit of a mix—play-ers can either be drafted directly out of high school or they are ineligible until they’re at least three years removed, much like that of the NFL. That way players who have a se-rious interest in playing ball professionally have the option, those who are not sure have the option to go to college, however this way they are not taking scholarships that could have otherwise gone to other students.

The NBA should reform its rules to get rid of one and done, for the sake of both the players and college basketball.

"One-and-done" helps no one

Tulsa’s men’s basketball team looked prom-ising in the preseason. The Golden Hur-ricane returns eight players, two of whom were 2013 C-USA All-Freshman selec-tions guard James Woodward and forward D’Andre Wright. Head coach Danny Man-ning believes the team has begun to bond with each other, saying “this summer was very good because our returning players had a chance to bond with the newcomers and say, ‘this is what we do. This is how we do it. This is why we do it. This is how we work.’ They helped establish the culture with our newcomers at an earlier stage in their careers here at TU.” However, they have not started out as well as was hoped.

TU lost their first two games this year against Oral Roberts and Missouri State. The team needs to refocus on the basics of basketball in order to start winning games; in both games, little details like boxing out, rebounding, and free throws took a toll on the Hurricane’s chances of winning. TU only had six offensive rebounds against

ORU and shot 47-percent from the free throw-line. However, it is still early in the season, and both games have been very close. The Hurricane still has a good chance of doing well this year.

The Golden Hurricane will take on Wich-ita State, a team which advanced to last sea-son’s Final Four, Wednesday at 7 p.m. in the Reynolds Center, and will be looking to re-bound after its 86–60 loss last year at Wich-ita State. Last season, “Wichita State came out with a lot of energy, and we weren’t able to match their energy,” said Manning. Wichita’s defense was strong, only allowing nine offensive rebounds and, at one point in the game, did not allow Tulsa to score for five minutes.

Tulsa will play in Omaha against Creigh-ton Saturday at 2:30 p.m.. The Bluejays are another team coming off a strong perfor-mance in March. Last year TU lost 71–54 and only shot 38-percent for the game. Tulsa gave up 32 points from 25 turnovers, but did out rebound the Bluejays 35–28. TU went seven and a half minutes without a field goal at one point in the game. It will need to find its shooting game early in the game this year in order to keep up with Creighton’s offense.

Be sure to be at the Reynolds Center Wednesday by 7 p.m. to cheer on the Golden Hurricane and the game against the Bluejays will be broadcast on Fox Sports Oklahoma.

Hurricane to face two of the nation’s best teams

Catherine DuininCKStaff Writer

The Tulsa men’s basketball team will face two teams, each with historically great basketball programs.

The Sound of the Golden Hurricane num-bers nearly 100 students and dresses in red, blue and gold. This loud and proud march-ing band is present at all TU football home games, and attends a few games off-campus as well as basketball games in the Reynolds Center. Directing the band is Andrew An-derson, who majored in Music Education at OU, then got a Master’s in Music Perfor-mance and Pedagogy at OSU.

Having already worked with athletic and concert bands, Anderson was hired this year to lead The Sound of the Golden Hurricane, and he has found students here to be “flex-ible and understanding of the goals for the group.” He is also proud that the group has managed to do “multiple shows this sea-son on limited rehearsal time,” since the band meets from 12–1:50 p.m. on Mon-day, Wednesday and Friday, but conflicting classes keep many of the students from at-tending all three sessions.

Clarinetist Will Chann reiterated that the time commitment for marching band is enormous. “As a mechanical engineer also involved in band, it is extremely hard to balance my studies around six hours of rehearsal a week plus whatever obligations we have for various sporting events,” said

Chann. Yet Chann conceded that while marching band “requires a lot of work, (it) is a great experience,” and that the “best part of marching band is definitely travel-ing.” He stated that “many of the locations we play are very cool,” notably “full college football stadium(s) like OU’s.”

Percussionist Ethan Rex said he actually began his college career as a music major, “but dropped it due to time constraints,” and that even being on the drum line still takes up a lot of time. However, Rex is thankful for his music scholarship, and he believes that the “best part of the drum line is defi-nitely rocking out at footballs games…that builds a lot of energy in a crowd.”

Anderson strives to make sure the songs the band plays are fun for the band and fans. Freshman Kaylee Pace, who was drum major of her high school’s marching band, thought that the Sound did not “play a lot of pep songs” after seeing a show, but An-derson hopes that “if a show we perform isn’t someone’s cup of tea, then we’ll have something coming up that they will enjoy more!” He added that the Sound has recent-ly performed excerpts from current movie soundtracks and pieces by “the rock group Queen.”

Finally, Anderson declared that his vision for the Sound of the Golden Hurricane is “to give the crowd as many tunes and shows that they’ll enjoy as possible,” and that a “sense of nostalgia and loyalty is a definite part of what collegiate bands try to evoke within the audience.”

Beautiful Sound does not come easy

Giselle WillisStaff Writer

The Sound of the Golden Hurricane aims to please crowds, but participation involves a major time commitment.

The Sound of the Golden Hurricane is a constant, braving the elements to bring spirit and joy to the crowd during every home football game.

David Kennedy / Collegian

niKKi haGerStaff Writer

The NBA policy forcing athletes to play one year of college ball before joining the NBA does not help anyone, specifically the athletes. The Association needs to reform the policy for the benefit all of involved.

The band is at the football games to help cheer on the team, but also to have fun. Drum major Justin Anderson can be seen playing with rubber chickens and Captain Cane’s lightning sword at football games.

David Kennedy / Collegian

The band played “Paranoid Android” by Radiohead during halftime of the football game Thursday and then preformed two Beyonce songs. The band dropped their instruments to grove to “Single Ladies.”

David Kennedy / Collegian

'

Last week, the Canadian Football League (CFL) held division finals matches between the Toronto Ar-gonauts and the Hamilton Tiger-Cats of the East Division, and the Saskatchewan Roughriders and the Calgary Stampeders of the West Division. The eight-team league’s 18-game regular season came to a close Nov. 3 and play-offs began Nov. 10 with six teams fighting for the Grey Cup.

The CFL is not well-known south of the border, despite an at-tempted southern expansion in the 1990s with seven teams estab-lished in the U.S., as well as three more proposed teams that never took the field. Founded in 1958, it is the second-oldest football league in North America (the NFL takes the top spot). Football has existed in various forms in Canada since the 1860s, and the CFL is the most successful iteration of of Canadian football unification attempts.

Though CFL generally closely resembles American football, the Canadian version has some major differences. For one, it is played on a larger field; 110 yards long and 65 yards wide with 20-yard end zones (for comparison, the U.Sl specifications are 100, 53.5, and ten, respectively). Also, each CFL team is allowed 12 players on the field, as opposed to 11 in the NFL. The field goal posts also sit at the goal line, similar to old-school football in the U.S.

Another noticeable difference is that the last team to touch a fumbled ball which goes out-of-bounds has possession, a rule which would have helped the Golden Hurricane Thursday night.

Perhaps the most interesting difference is that each team is al-

lowed three downs to advance ten yards with the option to punt after two plays.

One famous CFL player was Tulsa’s own All-American quar-terback Glenn Dobbs. Dobbs led the Golden Hurricane to regular-season record of 10–0 in 1942 and a No. 4 ranking following a 14–7 loss to the Tennesse Volunteers in the Sugar Bowl.

Dobbs was drafted by the Chi-cago Cardinals, the defending NFL champions, in 1944 but left for a better contract in the All-America Football Conference, a rival league to the NFL. In 1951, Dobbs left for the Saskatchewan Roughriders of the CFL, where he led the team to a Grey Cup cham-pionship in his first season with the team and won the Jeff Nicklin Memorial Trophy, the award given to the CFL West Division’s Most Outstanding Player.

Dobbs became a player-coach for the Roughriders the following

season, before leaving the CFL in 1955 to return to his alma mater to be the Athletic Director. He then became TU’s head football coach in 1961. He coached one of the most successful passing offenses in college football history during his tenure—his teams lead the na-tion in passing from 1962 to 1966.

Along with the aforementioned Toronto Argonauts, Hamilton Ti-ger-Cats, Saskatchewan Roughrid-ers and the Calgary Stampeders, the other four teams in the CFL are the Montreal Alouettes, Winnipeg Blue Bombers, BC Lions and Ed-monton Eskimos. Formed in 1873, the Argonauts are the oldest team. The CFL will return to the nation’s capital, Ottawa, next season when the Ottawa RedBlacks join the CFL. The Ottawa Rough Riders (unrelated to the Saskatchewan Roughriders) began play in 1876 and were a founding member of the CFL, but the franchise folded in 1996. Another team began play

in Ottawa in 2002, but folded after four seasons.

The champions of both divi-sions face off in the Grey Cup. The award was first given in 1909 to the Toronto Argonauts of a pre-vious league. Unlike most leagues which have a new trophy made every year, the Grey Cup travels from winner to winner, similar to hockey’s Stanley Cup. The Argo-nauts have won 16 times, the most of any team.

The Tiger-Cats and Roughriders prevailed to advance to the Grey Cup. The Tiger-Cats beat the Ar-gonauts 36–24 and the Roughrid-ers beat the Stampeders 35–13.

The two teams will face-off in the 101st Grey Cup which will take place Nov. 24 at 5 p.m. in Regina, Saskatchewan, home of the Roughriders. The 30,000 seat stadium sold out mid-July and will be televised in the U.S. on NBC Sports Network.

Iowa State University hosted the NCAA Division I Midwest Re-gional Cross Country Champion-ship Race Friday in Ames, Iowa. Tulsa’s Men Cross Country team placed second, making this its first automatic qualification for the NCAA Cross Country Champion-ship.

The race’s individual winner was Tulsa's senior Chris O’Hare who completed the 10 km race with a time of 30:28.0. The re-maining Tulsa runners all finished within the top-30. Marc Scott and Andrew Heyes came in fifth and sixth, respectively, trailing O’Hare by less than 10 seconds. Danny Thater finished 16th and Tim Rackers finished less than a min-ute behind O’Hare in 29th place.

In collegiate cross country points are scored based on the or-der each runner finishes the race. The first runner to cross the line gets one point, the second run-ner receives two points, etc. The scores from the first five finishing runners on each team are added to produce the team’s final score. This makes the lowest possible score a team can receive 15 points.

Like golf, the cross country team with the fewest points wins. TU earned 57 points, securing their place in the NCAA Cham-pionships. Tulsa was beat only

by Oklahoma State, who received first with 45 points. Following Tulsa in third place was the Iowa State Cyclones, with 113 points.

The national championship race, O’Hare’s last cross country race as a Golden Hurricane, is scheduled to begin at noon Satur-day in Terre Haute, Ind.

The team aims to improve on last year’s impressive seventh place finish. It placed one posi-tion higher than the Sooners last fall and has the defending national champion Cowboys in its sights.

The top finisher for the wom-en’s team was Natasha Cockram who finished the six km race 34th with a time of 21:23.0. Cockram was followed by Rachel Baptista 11 seconds later and Brandi Krieg 11 seconds after that. Emily Dunn finished 82nd at 21:55.8 and Jan-essa Dunn rounded out the team’s top five following Dunn across the finish line three seconds later.

The women’s team finished 12th out of 30 teams with 309 points, but less than 100 points out of a top-five finish.

Sportsthe Collegian : 5 18 november 2013

On Tuesday, Nov. 12, former heavey weight champion of the world, Mike Tyson released an autobiographical book, titled “Undisputed Truth,” which he co-authored (that term is being used very loosely) with Larry Sloman. Contrary to early reports and ru-mors, the book does not include a temporary Mike Tyson face tattoo.

In perhaps the most stunning revelation to come out of Tyson’s book, Tyson revealed that he was high on drugs during some of his major fights and that he passed his drug tests using a “whizzer”—”a fake penis where you put in some-one’s clean urine to pass your drug test.” Most people just use some-one else’s urine to pass drug tests, but Tyson couldn’t stop there. He had to use a fake penis.

The self-admitted “full-blown cokehead” said that he first had cocaine at 11 and received alcohol as a baby.

Florida State football has bul-lied its opponents on the way to an undefeated season and a No. 2 BCS ranking. On Saturday, the Seminoles routed Syracuse 59-3. Earlier in the year, Alabama head coach Nick Saban complained of his fans leaving the games early. Florida State has been so dominant that even its players have checked out by the ends of their games, at least mentally. Yes, these players are playing hangman on the side-line during the game.

Shockingly, USC beat Stanford on Saturday night 20–17. Some might say the difference-maker was USC’s play calling or maybe its offense. But in reality, it was the pep talk the team received from famed rap artist Dr. Dre. We can only imagine that he promised the players Beats headphones if they won.

With the midnight release of the Sony PlayStation 4, Dallas Cow-boys WR Dez Bryant showed up at a Walmart and bought out all of the PS4s. Infamous for his charac-ter issues which have manifested in sideline tirades and other antics, one might think he was buying them all for himself. But this story has a good ending; Bryant gave the PS4s to the gamers who were waiting in line. My heart warms at the thought of a free PS4.

Famously bearded relief pitcher and former Giant and Dodger, Brian Wilson refused to sign with the Yankees. Did they not offer him enough money? No, he just didn’t want to part with his trade-mark black beard to comply with Yankee team rules. I do not care how sick my beard is: facial hair can always grow back, but money is forever.

Jesse KeippStaff Writer

Photo courtesy CBS Sports

The Seminoles have been playing so well this season, the players have to find something to do when the stringers go onto the field. Apparently, hangman is a good use of time during a football game.

Wednesday Nov. 20

M. Basketball vs Wichita State Reynolds Center 7 p.m.

Thursday Nov. 21

Volleyball C-USA First Round

Murfreesboro, Tenn. TBA

Friday Nov. 22Volleyball vs UTEP El Paso, Texas 8 p.m.

Volleyball** C-USA Quarterfinals

Murfreesboro, Tenn. TBA

Saturday Nov. 23

Cross Country NCAA Championships Terre Haute, Ind. 12 p.m.

M. Basketball vs Creighton Omaha, Neb. 2:30 p.m.

Football vs Louisiana Tech Ruston, La. 6 p.m.

Volleyball** C-USA Semifinals

Murfreesboro, Tenn. TBA

Sunday Nov. 24

Volleyball** C-USA Finals

Murfreesboro, Tenn. TBA

Tuesday Nov. 26

W. Basketball vs Oral Roberts Reynolds Center 7 p.m.

Wednesday Nov. 27

M. Basketball vs Indiana State Anchorage, Alaska 10:30 p.m.

Friday Nov. 29M. Basketball vs TBD Anchorage, Alaska TBA

Saturday Nov. 30

Football vs North Texas H.A. Chapman Stadium TBA

M. Basketball vs TBD Anchorage, Alaska TBA

Tuesday Dec. 3W. Basketball vs St. Louis St. Louis, Mo. 4:30 p.m.

Wednesday Dec. 4

M. Basketball vs Texas Southern Reynolds Center 7:05 p.m.

Saturday Dec. 7W. Basketball vs UALR Reynolds Center 1 p.m.M. Basketball vs UALR Reynolds Center 3:30 p.m.

Tuesday Dec. 10W. Basketball vs Arkansas Fayetteville, Ark. 7 p.m.

** if the volleyball team advances in C-USA tournament.

• ESPN’sCollegeGameDaywillbebroadcastfromStillwater,Okla.beforetheOklahomaStateCowboysvsBaylorBearsgameNov.23.

• Saturdaywillmarkthe45thanniversaryofthe1968Houstonvs.TulsafootballgameinwhichtheCougarsbeattheGoldenHurricane100–6.Itwasthelastgameinwhichacollegefootballteamscoredatleast100pointsandincludedthen-freshmanDr.Phil,whowasontheGoldenHurricanefootballteamforoneseason.

• ThePittsburghPenguinsandChicagoBlackhawksaresettoface-offatSoldierFieldinChicagointheNationHockeyLeague’sfirstregularseasongamescheduledtobebroadcastinprimetimeonnetworkTVsinceagameJan.4,1974betweentheNewYorkRangersandBostonBruins.Thegame,partoftheNHL’snewseriesofoutdoorgames,issetforMarch1,2014at7p.m.,daybeforeNBC’sHockeyDayinAmericatriple-headeranddaysaftertheNHLreturnsfromhiatusfortheWinterOlympics.

• TulsafreshmanvolleyballliberoBrookeBerryhillsetaschoolrecord41-digsintheHurricane’s3–2come-from-behindvictoryovertheUTEPMiners.TheHurricanetraveledtoSanAntonio,TexastofacetheUTSARoadrunnersSundayinadefactoC-USAtitlegame.TheRoadrunnersswepttheGoldenHurricane3–0toclaimtheregularseasonC-USAtitleandtheNo.1seedintheC-USAvolleyballtournament.TheHurricaneentersthetournament,whichbeginsThursdayinMurfreesboro,Tenn,astheNo.3seed.

• TheTulsa66erslosttheirfirstpreseasongameThursday102–95totheTexasLegendsandthenlostthenextnight115-100totheErieBayHawks.The66ersopenregularseasonplayFridayandSaturdayagainsttheIowaEnergyat7p.m.intheSpiritBankEventCenter.

• TheTulsaRevolutionofthePremierArenaSoccerLeaguereturntotheTulsaConventionCenterFridayat7p.m.toplaytheHidalgoLaFieraafterlosingtheirfirstthreegames.

• TheTulsaOilersarenow7–6–2thisseasonafterdefeatingtheWichitaThundertwiceandtheBramptonBeastSundayafternoon6–3.TheOiler’snextgameattheBOKCenterisSundayat4:05pm.againsttheAllenAmericans.

News and Notes

Canadians play football, too!

MattheW MaGerKurth Staff Writer

The Super Bowl is a time-honored American tradition, but the Canadians began competing for the Grey Cup 58 years before the first Super Bowl.

Photo courtesy Major League BaseballBrian Wilson is a man of values. One specific values stands above the rest. He values his beard above all else, including money from the Yankee’s massive bank.

XC to nationals; O’Hare dominates Midwest

MOrGan KrueGerApprentice Editor

The men’s team came within 12 points of first at the Midwest Regional; O’Hare took first place.

After playing and recording for almost twenty years, Switchfoot is switching up their shows and their sound.

While typical concerts have an opening band or two, Switch-foot has instead opted to open each show of their current tour with a documentary on the band, followed by a few songs from their ninth studio album, “Fading West,” scheduled for release on Jan. 14, 2014.

In an exclusive interview, The Collegian spoke with Switchfoot’s keyboard player, Jerome Fontam-illas, about the documentary “Fad-ing West” and the upcoming tour.

Over the release of eight al-bums, Switchfoot has evolved their sound just as most bands do. Switchfoot elected to change its guitar-driven orientation. Unlike previous albums “Hello Hurri-cane” and “Vice Verses,” in “Fad-ing West,” Switchfoot “stripped

down the songs and tried to add different elements to the sound,” according to Fontamillas.

“One of our goals was that we don’t add guitar until we have to. The guitar part was the last part we put into the song,” said Fontamil-las.

Listening to the already-re-leased “Fading West” EP, fans will undoubtedly notice not necessar-ily a lack of guitar, but a different utilization of the instrument alto-gether. Guitars do not dominate the choruses—rather, electronic keyboards replace guitar riffs.

“You hear the guitars, but you’re focusing on the song itself,” said Fontamillas.

Asking themselves, “What can we do to make our next album special?” Switchfoot decided to take an unconventional approach to their concerts by opening each show with their autobiographical documentary, also titled “Fading West.”

“(The documentary is) another way of us trying to express our-selves. We never really opened up inside our lives before, besides the stage. We opened up the camera into our homes and into our fami-lies, and we’ve never done that be-fore,” Fontamillas explained.

The documentary followed the worldwide travels of the band, in-cluding a visit to African villages,

“where 90 percent of the kids’ par-ents died of AIDS.”

The film also chronicles the band in Australia, playing with Marilyn Manson and Bush.

“You take a lot of these differ-ent elements. And you come to the conclusion that life is precious. Life is a gift. Every breath you get a second chance,” said Fontamil-las of their travels.

The documentary also connects Switchfoot music’s to surfing, ex-amining Switchfoot’s surf culture and its influence on their music. Since three of the band members grew up in surfing communities, “surfing is in our culture. It’s a way of life,” said Fontamillas.

“Being out on the ocean, you get to think a lot. When you’re out on a surfboard, a lot of things go through your mind,” said Fontam-illas.

After a viewing of the docu-mentary at each show, the band will play a relatively short setlist of songs, followed by a live Twit-ter Q&A. In addition to the live Q&A, the band has scheduled all of their shows at intimate venues.

“We’re not playing these huge amphitheaters. So I could see the back of the room and make eye contact,” said Fontamillas.

Switchfoot will be visiting Tul-sa and playing at the Brady The-ater on Friday, Nov. 22.

“Everyone who knew him de-scribed him as a bright light,” said Michael Hunt’s sister, Elisabeth Hunt.

OU freshman Seth Blair, a child-hood friend of Michael’s, said that he was “amazing” because of the “strength that he provided in prov-ing to the world that he was who he was.”

Michael was born on Nov. 28, 1990. He was adopted by Linda Jo Lacey and Victor Lee Hunt within

two weeks of his birth and grew up in Tulsa.

“Hunt’s love of performing be-gan at age six when he debuted in ‘Raggedy Ann and Andy’ with Ac-tors and Children’s Theatre,” said the Tulsa World. At TU he starred as Moritz in “Spring Awakening,” Seymour in “Little Shop of Hor-rors,” Carney in “Biloxi Blues” and Jack in “Into the Woods.”

Blair also described Michael as “talented,” and Elisabeth Hunt said he was “the most talented per-former Tulsa had seen in years.”

Machele Dill, the University of Tulsa’s Musical Theatre Program Director, agreed. After calling him an “incredibly talented perform-er,” she talked about how “he was

“I give you my pledge: I will con-tinue to give it my all,” proclaimed Dewey Bartlett after winning the Nov. 12 mayoral election.

Bartlett received 55 percent of the vote. His opponent, Kathy Taylor, received 45 percent.

The voter turnout, as reported by Tulsa World, was at an unprec-edented high of “36.1 percent of registered voters,” compared to lower participation in general elec-tions since 2002.

This mayoral race was also the most expensive in Tulsa’s his-tory. The Tulsa World explained

that the amount of money spent in the campaign, “including primary challenger Bill Christiansen,” to-taled $4.56 million.

After results were announced, Bartlett congratulated support-ers at the Oklahoma Jazz Hall of Fame on “a very historical time in (the) Republican party” due to success over a “very well-funded opponent.”

Taylor thanked her supporters at The Rusty Crane restaurant, advis-ing them to “look at what unites (Tulsans)” and asking them to “volunteer for Reading Partners, a nonprofit organization dedicated to helping children read.”

Tulsans additionally voted on Propositions 1–3, dealing with council salaries and plans to “im-prove our Tulsa.”

Proposition 1 creates a six per-cent raise for city councilors, and it was approved last Tuesday with

56 percent of the vote. Proposition 2 is an “extension

of a 1.1 percent sales tax to cover the expenses of capital improve-ment projects” in Tulsa. Ratified by 70 percent of voters, the tax will continue through June 30, 2021, ultimately amassing $563.7 million for the projects.

Carrying with 72 percent of the vote, Proposition 3 similarly focuses on improving Tulsa’s infrastructure. This proposition approves $355 million “for the purpose of building, rebuilding, improving and repairing streets and bridges,” reported Channel 2 News.

Councilor G.T. Bynum said that the approval of these last two propositions “marks the largest investment in streets in our city’s history and will provide the tools our police and firefighters need to keep Tulsa safe.”

neWS the Collegian : 618 november 2013

Campus mourns Michael HuntFamily and friends remember Michael Hunt, who passed away Nov. 11.

Giselle WillisStaff Writer

Marta Tienda, a sociologist fo-cused on racial and ethnical influ-ences on inequality, will contrib-ute a lecture to the Buck Colbert Franklin Memorial Civil Rights Lecture series on Nov. 21.

Marta Tienda is a sociologist at Princeton University. According to her department’s website, her “research has focused on race and ethnic differences in various met-rics of social inequality—rang-ing from poverty and welfare to education and employment—to address how ascribed attributes acquire their social and economic significance.”

Tienda recently completed a ten year study on “the effectives of so-cial policy in broadening access to higher education,” as stated by her website.

Tienda has published six books on demography with a focus on Hispanics in the United States, and is the Director of Princeton’s Program in Latino Studies.

On Nov. 21, Tienda will be giv-ing a talk entitled “From Diversity to Inclusion Post Grutter and Fish-er” in John Rogers Hall at 6:00

p.m., preceded by a reception at 5:30 p.m.

According to TU’s website, Tienda will be visiting TU as a part of the Buck Colbert Franklin Memorial Civil Rights Lecture, which is named in honor of a civil rights lawyer who became promi-nent in the Greenwood community of Tulsa after the 1921 Tulsa Race Riots, and his son, renowned his-torian John Hope Franklin.

Princeton sociologist to discuss inequality

Dr. Marta Tienda is a leading expert on demography and inequality.

Giselle WillisStaff Writer

Courtesy Princeton

Marta Tienda’s research “focuses on race and ethnic differences in various metrics of social inequality.”

hungry for feedback.” Once after Dill criticized Hunt,

she quoted him as saying, “Yeah, I wasn’t too happy, but damn if you weren’t right.”

Dill had recently made Hunt her TA for Musical Theatre Per-formance I and II. She mentioned that even though she and Michael “butt(ed) heads” his freshman year, he came back to ask for a second chance.

“It takes an incredibly strong person to come back to a place where he burned his bridges and ask to be allowed back in,” Dill said.

Hunt was going to be Dill’s cho-reographer for “Altar Boyz” this coming spring.

Alayna Doiron, a friend of Mi-chael’s, said that his passing came “as a complete and utter shock to all,” but that “in the wake of this pain and tragedy, an idea has been formed that will help to secure Michael’s name at the University of Tulsa and in the general Tulsa community for generations.”

Doiron worked with Joey Mop-pert and Michael’s family to create The Michael Victor Forrest Hunt Endowed Memorial Scholarship for Musical Theatre.

The scholarship has set a dona-tion goal of $25,000 which “will ensure that the scholarship [can] give back to … aspiring students who reflect the same passion and love of life that Michael had,” ac-cording to Doiron.

Interested donors should go to

www.utulsa.edu/giving.Dill concluded by saying Mi-

chael had been “on the brink of taking the world by storm.”

Michael’s memorial service was Nov. 15 at All Souls Unitarian Church, and Patricia Joyce,

assistant to the Provost, said that a memory book has been placed in the Meditation Chapel at Sharp Memorial Chapel “for those who wish to share their messages of condolence with Michael’s family.”

Mayor Bartlett re-elected, “Improve Our Tulsa” propositions passed

The incumbent mayor won with fifty-five percent of the vote. All three propositions on the ballot passed.

5 1 6 7

9 2 7 6

3 5 8 1

7 8 9

6 1 7

4 5 6 8

9 7 2 8

2 9 6 3

Puzzle 1 (Easy, difficulty rating 0.41)

Generated by http://www.opensky.ca/~jdhildeb/software/sudokugen/ on Sun Nov 17 21:04:20 2013 GMT. Enjoy!

Do the Sudoku

Courtesy Lakeshore Learning

Hear ye, hear ye! You have been named king of Sudokuland. As part of your kingly duties, you must reassign land to your nobles after you have, in a very kingly fashion, killed off the “ignoble” nobles. Your nobles (which are conveniently named Lord One through Lord Nine) are very particular about what land they will accept, and they will likely support your opponent, Lord Zero, if you give them land that is in the same column, row or three-by-three box as their other plots. Since all royal edicts are issued through break-out boxes in copies of the Collegian, you must fill out the Sudoku here and now. Good luck, and God save the king!

Giselle WillisStaff Writer

In an exclusive interview with the Collegian, Switchfoot’s Jeremy Fontamillas discussed Switchfoot’s Nov. 22 show and their upcoming documentary and album.

Jesse KeippStaff Writer

Upcoming Switchfoot concert opens with documentary

Michael Hunt, who passed away on Nov. 11, was an active member of the TU musical theatre department, having performed in such plays as “Spring Awakening,” “Little Shop of Horrors,” “Biloxi Blues” and “Into the Woods.”

Courtesy Grace Seidel

In the Nov. 11 issue of the Collegian, it appears that we inadver-tantly published two entire pages flipped on their sides. While the Collegian could face facts and admit responsibility to this mistake, we would like to instead point out that we have a gremlin hiding in our office. How else can you explain two pages that flipped over onto their sides while we weren’t looking? I mean, seriously, we spent hours laying out the biggest Collegian ever, and some punk gremlin slipped in and screwed every thing up. Thanks, Obama.

But really, we won’t let anything ridiculous like flipped-over pages or images covering the masthead into future Collegians.

Trojan Brand Condoms released its annual Sexual Health Report Card this week, ranking 140 national universities based on sexual health resources. The University of Tulsa ranked 99, edging out Thursday’s football rival, Marshall University, by one spot. Working with the in-dependent research firm Sperling’s BestPlaces, Trojan ranks student health centers on criteria including hours of operation, contraceptive and condom availability, quality of

sexual health information, sexual assault programming, STI testing and others.

This year, Princeton University took the top spot on Trojan’s list as well as U.S. News and World Re-port’s national university rankings. Nearby schools the University of Texas, Oklahoma University and Oklahoma State University ranked 8th, 79th and 107th respectively n the Trojan list. Consistently ranked at the lowest place and there again this year was Brigham Young Uni-versity.

TU has been falling consistently in Trojan’s rankings since 2011. It was ranked 79th in 2011 and 89th in 2012.

neWSthe Collegian : 7 18 november 2013

Southeast Asia

PHILLIPINES

Typhoon Haiyan struck central Philippines on Nov. 7 and killed at

least 2,300 people, with the figure expected to increase.

According to the UN, more than 11 million people have been af-fected by the typhoon that experts say is one of the most powerful storms ever recorded on land.

Five days after the typhoon, Al Jazeera’s Wayne Hay reports that bodies of the deceased are still

strewn across the streets, decaying in the sun.

“People simply have to walk past those bodies, which is rais-ing concerns about the health situ-ation over the weeks and months ahead,” he said.

According to BBC, the inter-national community has pledged a total of more than $640 million in aid so far with the troops and medical staff from the US, Japan, South Korea and Australia among others.

Europe

SPAIN

Last Wednesday, a Spanish court pardoned the Spanish government of any responsibility for the 2002 oil spill that occurred in Spain’s northwestern coastline.

The only defendant sentenced was the captain of the oil tanker

Eye on the world:

MaGDalena suDiBJOStaff Writer

Apostolos Mangouras, who was found guilty of disobeying orders but not of any criminal acts.

“Nobody knows exactly what might have been the cause of what happened, nor what would have been the appropriate response to the emergency situation created by the Prestige’s breakdown,” said Judge Juan Luis Pía in defense of the ruling.

The Prestige, the 26-year-old oil tanker, split in half into the At-lantic and spilt 20 million gallons of oil into the Atlantic late Nov. 11 years ago, becoming Spain’s worst-ever environmental disaster.

“The court’s decision is abso-lutely scandalous,” Juan López de Uralde, a member of the Green party Equo, told the Guardian. “It is a kick in the teeth to all those people who went to help clean up the oil.”

Africa

SOMALIA

A tropical cyclone and heavy floods in Somalia’s Puntland re-gion have left at least 100 people and several thousands of livestock dead with many more without shelter, electricity and clean water.

“Knowing that livestock and fisheries are key livelihood activi-ties in the affected regions, we an-ticipate the storm to heavily hurt coastal communities,” said Rudi Van Aaken, the acting head of the UN’s Food and Agricultural Orga-

nization in Somalia.Relief trucks are having trouble

reaching affected areas since flash floods have made many roads and air strips inaccessible.

Somalian President Hassan Sheikh Mohamud has promised $1 million to help the devastated re-gion, and the UN has also pledged its support.

South America

VENEZUELA

Hundreds of people flocked to re-tail stores after Venezuelan Presi-dent Nicolas Maduro sent out troops to force shopkeepers to cut prices in an effort to deal with the country’s more than 50 percent in-flation rate.

“We’re doing this for the good of the nation,” the president said, claiming that shop managers were waging an “economic war” against the country. The President also ac-cused his political opponents of hoarding and speculation, and the internet of spreading panic.

Critics say that the President’s price control was an attempt to gain more votes for next month’s mayoral elections but that the mea-sures would not help the economy.

“Every time he opens his mouth, he scares away the invest-ments that create employment, and he worsens the crisis,” said oppo-sition leader Henrique Capriles of President Maduro.

The TU Chemical Engineering Car team took first place in the American Institute of Chemical Engineers (AiCHE) national com-petition at the Student Conference in San Francisco.

Led by team captain Jasmine Htoon and advisor Dr. Tyler Jo-hannes, Tulsa edged out the Okla-homa State team in both the Nor-man regionals and the national competition to claim the prize for the first time since 2005.

By combining two batteries they had been trying separately, the team experienced more power than most teams did at minimal cost.

“It’s a $2000 spending limit on this car, so people build this thing the size of a shoebox that costs, like, $1300. Ours cost $150. So, we were in the top two cheapest cars, and we won,” says senior Weston Kightlinger, first-year team member.

The competition itself consists of two separate runs to determine the effectiveness of the drive mechanism and the brake mecha-nism, the two most basic consider-ations of automobile motion.

Each team brings their vehicle to the competition and is told an hour before the event how far their car needs to run. They then have that hour to calibrate their cars ac-cordingly. The team with the run closest to the desired distance is the winner.

After a slow start on the first run, the Tulsa team was concerned about their vehicle. However, what they lacked in speed was made up for in precision.

“We had timed it exactly right, and it actually stopped three cen-timeters next to the line,” said Kightlinger. “Teams got as close as six centimeters, but they never got inside our three.”

The team’s second run didn’t go as smoothly. Due to a last-minute brake malfunction, the car never stopped. It did not affect the team’s victory, however—they still had the closest distance.

The victory includes a $2000 prize package for the chemical en-gineering department.

Chem-E students can get in-volved with the team by taking the required Reactor Design course, in which every student designs a car.

Every Chem-E student has to design a car for a reactor design course. Kightlinger designed the car in his class and decided to join the official team after going to the national conference last year and winning a paper competition.

“I think it’ll bring new assets

to the program and hopefully get more kids involved in these extra-curricular activities,” said Kight-linger, “where they can apply what they have learned in the classroom to some real problems right in front of them that they can then be rewarded for in competition.”

Chemical engineers win national competition

Courtesy Phillip DixonThe TU Chemical Engineering Car team calibrates its car in preparation for one of its two competitive runs. TU’s car excelled in its brake mechanism, finishing closer to the target line than any other car in the first round.

TU’s miniature car came closest to the target distance and was among the cheapest.

MattheW MaGerKurthStaff Writer

Various Oklahoma environmental and law organizations will host an Oklahoma Environmental Agencies Roundtable on Friday, Dec. 6 from 10:30 a.m. until 1 p.m in John Rogers Hall in the Price & Turpen Courtroom on the University of Tulsa’s campus.

The roundtable’s primary subject matter is water quality regulation in Oklahoma.

“The agencies regulating water quality in Oklahoma made a num-ber of significant changes in the past year or so,” said Assistant Dean Jason Aamodt. “Moreover, lots of folks are not aware that so many different agencies have a hand in water quality regulation.”

There will be eight speakers representing eight public organiza-tions. The event will be moderated by Aamodt and Jeri Fleming, Environmental Programs Manager of the Oklahoma Conservation Commision.

The roundtable is free and open to the public. Lunch will be pro-vided. RSVP to barbette-veit@utulsa.edu.

Agencies to discuss Okla. water regulation

Nov. 8

17:15Officers on foot patrol in Mayo Village observed an unlabeled prescription pill bottle containing pills on the window sill of a stu-dent’s apartment.

Officers made contact with the student and explained it was il-legal for medication to be con-tained in unmarked containers.

Nov. 10

0:15Officers responded to the 5th Pl. House for a report of malicious mischief/vandalism.

Residents of the 5th Pl. House reported several shoes and cloth-ing items had been slashed with a knife by a possible known suspect.

16:45Officers responded with EMSA to an injured person in the DRC. The non-TU affiliated person lost their balance and fell, landing on the arena seats and hitting their head.

The person was able to walk out of the arena and was transported by a family to a local hospital for further treatment.

Nov. 11

13:30Residents of the Pi Kappa Alpha

fraternity reported unknown sus-pects had damaged a chiminea and overturned a grill in the back courtyard of the house. The inves-tigation is pending.

19:45After investigating and reviewing video footage of Case Athletic, Officers were able to identify the person responsible for pulling a paper towel and soap dispenser off the wall of a bathroom in the Case Athletic Building.

Nov. 12

3:35Officers responded to a fire alarm at the Reynolds Center. Upon ar-rival, Officers did not find any sign of smoke or fire and it was deter-mined that there is a malfunction in the system and a work order was submitted.

Nov. 13

16:40Officers responded to a fire alarm at the 5th Pl. House. Upon arrival, Officers determined that a student using body spray activated the alarm.

11:05The student who reported damage to their vehicle that was parked in the US West Lot came to Campus Security to provide additional in-formation. The student reported that a friend had borrowed the ve-hicle without the student’s knowl-edge and damaged the vehicle while off-campus. The friend has offered to pay for the damages.

Nov. 14

1:05Officers on patrol witnessed a stu-dent stumbling and flapping their arms like a bird near Keplinger Hall.

Upon making contact, the stu-dent admitted to drinking alcohol at an unidentified fraternity house.

Officers determined the student was not of legal drinking age. The student was escorted back to their residence and met with a Housing staff member.

The Collegian does not produce or edit the Campus Crime Watch ex-cept for content and brevity.

On Nov. 14 at 1:05 a.m., officers spotted a student “stumbling and flapping their arms like a bird” near Keplinger. Our staff police artist, Jill Graves, was on the scene, and drew this sketch of the incident, accurate to the minutest detail.

University ranks in bottom third in sexual health

staFF repOrt

Trojan’s annual Sexual Health Report Card ranked TU 99th out of 140.

Three out of three people in our blind taste test preferred Samuel Smith’s Organic Chocolate Stout over the other commercially avail-able dark chocolate beers. Our taste test was comprised of three TU students who identified them-selves as: a non-beer-drinker, a wannabe sommelier and a stout enthusiast.

We pitted Young’s Double Chocolate Stout, Great Divide Brewing Co.’s Chocolate Oak Aged Yeti, Rouge’s Chocolate Stout and Samuel Smith’s Organ-ic Chocolate Stout against each other to find which chocolate beer reigned supreme.

All four are considered spe-cialty beers and must be obtained at a bottle shop, although Young’s and the Organic can be purchased at McNellie’s and Kilkenny’s. We procured ours from Midtown Li-quor.

Our tasters found that the win-

ning Samuel Smith’s Organic Chocolate Stout does in fact taste like liquid chocolate. The label proudly reads: “The gently roasted organic chocolate malt and real or-ganic cocoa used in this ale impart a delicious, smooth and creamy character, with inviting deep fla-vors and a delightful finish”—an accurate statement. Moreover, the stout is USDA certified organic.

The Great Divide Brewing Co.’s Chocolate Oak Aged Yeti had a much thicker flavor, which may come off as burnt depending on the palate. The difference between it and the Organic is much like that between milk and dark chocolate. The Yeti is significantly more bit-ter, and has much louder flavors.

For those looking for a beer that simply has a chocolate slant, but is not too sweet, the Young’s Double Chocolate Stout is the way to go. The beer could have been mistak-en for a pure stout, had it not had “chocolate” in its title. This is per-haps tantamount to naming a wine after one of its many component flavors. The chocolate is no more than a suggestion, as the predomi-nate flavor is really coffee.

The lowest ranked beer was the Rouge’s Chocolate Stout. It cer-tainly was not a bad beer by any means, as breweries adventurous enough to create a chocolate beer are already typically successful in many other areas. However, the beer was simply not as good a stout as the Young’s, and not as chocolaty as the Organic or the Yeti. Rouge is unimpressive in all respects, and let’s be honest, who has time for unimpressive beer?

Four chocolate beers went forth to duel

Young’s, Yeti and Rogue were coolBut the winner was clear:Organic chocolate beer!Enjoy responsibly in school.

variety the Collegian : 818 november 2013

Electronic Arts’ biggest franchise is back in full force with a new title this year. “Battlefield 4,” de-veloped by Sweden-based DICE, was released for the PC, PlaySta-tion 3 and Xbox 360 on Oct. 29. At its core, “Battlefield 4” stands as a solid successor to 2011’s “Bat-tlefield 3,” although the unusual amount of similarity between the two games may distress long-time fans of the series.

In many ways, “Battlefield 4” builds positively on the success of its predecessor, which in itself was a huge step forward from “Battle-field 2,” released in 2005. The franchise’s most notable feature is a large-scale, destructible, real-istic map, and it has been greatly improved upon in “Battlefield 4.” Moreover, DICE has done a truly remarkable job at creating interest-ing settings for multiplayer maps.

On “Hainan Resort,” teams will clash throughout a large aban-doned luxury resort, spread out across an archipelago in the South China Sea. “Zavod 311” takes the fight to a tank factory in Russia, where players will engage oppo-nents amidst large-scale manufac-turing equipment. The game cur-rently supports a total of 10 maps, ranging in scope from small, in-fantry-focused maps to enormous landscapes complete with tanks, helicopters and jets.

The multiplayer maps are fur-ther complemented by DICE’s new feature, dubbed “Levolu-tion,” which allows for the maps to dynamically change as a result of player actions. For example, in Flood Zone, a standard urban map under normal conditions, teams have the option to destroy a nearby dam, which submerges the city in water and drastically changes the tactical nature of the battle.

“Battlefield 4” also re-introduc-es Commander Mode—last seen in 2006’s “Battlefield 2142”—to the series. This highly strategic

option enables players from each team to enter a real-time strategy view of the map, and take com-mand of the team.

This mode allows the com-mander player to issue orders to squads, and to support his or her team with various assets such as supply drops, radar sweeps and missile strikes. Additionally, through a simple download, play-ers can use Commander Mode on a variety of devices other than con-soles and PC, such as tablets and smart phones.

The latest installment builds on its predecessor in a number of other ways. There are a plethora of new game modes added to the franchise, the most notable of which is Obliteration, where the opposing teams must destroy each other’s bomb sites while protect-ing their own.

DICE has also added a rather interesting mode titled “Defuse.” This tactical variant features a con-densed player count—two squads of eight—where teams must ac-complish objectives. In this game mode players will be unable to respawn while completing ob-jectives. In other words, downed players will not return to the action until the start of the new round.

In addition to these new game modes, traditional options such as Conquest, Rush and Deathmatch are still available.

Customization is better than ever in “Battlefield 4.” Players finally have the ability to select a weapon camouflage pattern, something present in the fran-chise’s main competition for quite a while. Camouflage patterns can also be added to vehicles, another first for the series.

There is also a huge variety of attachments for the hundreds of in-game weapons for players to unlock, ranging from various op-tics to muzzle components to grip configurations. Combat uniform customization, a feature added in “Battlefield 3,” has also been ex-panded.

One cannot review a Battlefield game without turning some atten-tion to the presentation of the title. Fans of the series will be pleased to learn that “Battlefield 4” contin-ues the legacy set by its predeces-sors—the graphics and sound are top of the line in quality.

DICE’s attention to detail has really paid off, as the visuals and audio do a great job of immers-ing the player in the game world. Of course, this experience varies heavily according to what plat-form the game is played on.

For all its positives, “Battlefield 4” is far from a perfect game, as a

number of issues hamper the title. For one, due to the aged hardware of the current generation consoles, the PlayStation 3 and Xbox 360 versions of the title are severely limited.

The player limit is capped at 24, compared to 64 on the PC, the graphics are noticeably less attrac-tive and the overall experience does not translate well to the cur-rent generation consoles. Fortu-nately, this issue will be somewhat alleviated when “Battlefield 4” comes to the next generation Play-Station 4 and Xbox One, after their respective launch dates.

The single-player experience does not fare well, either. After so many failed attempts to deliver a good solo-play campaign, DICE would most certainly be better off removing the idea entirely, instead focusing 100 percent of its efforts on multiplayer content.

“Battlefield 4’s” story involves a ridiculous plot that revolves around the United States and Rus-sia teaming up in order to fight a Chinese military insurgency. The campaign ultimately condenses down to a horribly linear, repeti-tive, shooting gallery with some fancy explosions thrown in. To say that gamers who skip out on the story mode would not miss much is a drastic understatement.

Finally, perhaps one of the most unfortunate aspects of “Battlefield 4” is how similar it feels to the pre-vious installment in the series. The jump from “Battlefield 2” to “Bat-tlefield 3” was revolutionary and jaw dropping for fans of the fran-chise, and it really is a shame that such a success was not repeated in the transition from “Battlefield 3” to “Battlefield 4.”

Perhaps this shortcoming was due to pressure put on DICE by Electronic arts to ensure that the game launched in time for the sale-critical holiday season, but it is im-possible to tell for sure.

Cons aside, “Battlefield 4” is an outstanding game, and perhaps the best first person shooter of 2013. Even better, DICE has confirmed continued support and new DLC well into 2015, so it is safe to say that the fans of the series will get to enjoy new content and an active game for quite a while.

For players that have a decent gaming PC, this title is definitely worth picking up. Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3 gamers may want to wait until the next generation versions launch, as the current console variations do not do the game justice. “Battlefield 4” earns a superb 8.5/10 on the PC, and a 7.5/10 on the Xbox 360 and Play-Station 3.

Action-packed “Battlefield 4” successfully builds on predecessor

elliOt BauManStaff Writer

Released on Oct. 29 for the PC, PlayStation 3 and Xbox 360, DICE’s “Battlefield 4” is a worthy follow-up to 2011’s “Battlefield 3.” The latest installment in the series features dynamically changing multiplayer maps, new game modes and outstanding graphics.

By anna Bennett

Things to Be Thankful ForAh,theHolidays.Smellslikefamilialguiltandsuperfluousgreetingcards,doesn’tit?Andwithfinalsanddeadlinesapproachingmuchfasterthanyoucouldeverimagine,itishardtofeelverycheeryorthankful.Butnomatterhowbadthingsget,there’salwayssomethingtobethankfulfor.

1.Yourfinancialaid.TUisexpensive,butalsogenerous.IknowthatIthankmyluckystarseverydayformyscholarships.

2.Yourfriends.Theyareablessingthatshouldneverbetakenforgranted.

3.Yourfamily.Yes,theyareannoyinganddysfunctional.Yes,yourgrandmothersmellslikemothballsandhasamustachethattickleswhenshegoesinforakiss.

Andyes,youwouldmuchratherbewithyourfriendsoverthebreak.Butyouareluckytobeabletogohome,andsurelyyouloveafewofthem.Oratleastone.Onarelatednote…

4.Thecaffood.Nothingmakesyouappreciate

thecomfortsofyourmom’scookingquitelikeextendeddosesofSodexoforbreakfast,lunchanddinner.

5.Allthemistakesyouhavemadethispastsemester.Theyhavemadeyouwhoyouare,andyou,sirormadam,areawesome.Lifeistooshortforregret.

6.Yourprofessors.Sometimesthingsarealotmorebearablewithanolder,wiserpersononyourteam.Shoutouttomyprofs,yo.

7.Allthatstress.Yup,itsucks.Butitshowsthatafterallthistime,youstillgiveadarn,andthat’ssomething.Neverforgetwhyit’sworththestress.

8.Parkingtickets.Isn’titkindofgreatthatallofthethingsyouhavetocomplainaboutaresosilly?Luckyblighter.

9.Thingsunplanned.Maybenothingwentquitehowyouimaginedthissemester.Butjustmaybe,thatimpromptumovienightwaswaybetterthantheelaborateplansthatfellthrough.

10.Theon-campusbar.Yeah.

helen pattersOnNon-beer Drinker

leiGh taylOrWannabe Sommelier

Hailing from the United Kingdom, Colorado and Oregon, four chocolate stouts were pitted against one another in a blind taste test. Our tasters found that the winning Samuel Smith’s Organic Chocolate Stout maintained a creamy texture and tasted like actual chocolate.

beer

Battle of the chocolate stouts: England prevails!

The Collegian wants to help your organization reach more people! Ask us about our reasonable rates.

Please contact elizabeth-cohen@utulsa.edu

Photo courtesy DICE

Vehicles have always been an integral part of the Battlefield franchise, and “Battlefield 4” is no exception. In multiplayer, gamers are able to customize and control tanks, helicopters, jets and even boats in order to lay waste to their opponents. The availability of each vehicle depends on the selected map, and gamers are able to unlock a number of new features as they play.

KiMBerly pOFFStout Enthusiast

The Student Association has a bud-get of nearly $800,000. Last year, nearly $200,000 of this went un-spent. Each semester, TU students pay a $120 student activity fee, which was first assessed in 1995 by a vote of the students. This fee contributes $175,000 a semester to the SA budget.

The $200,000 rollover alone should justify a reduction in spending, but this is not the only rationale for the complete elimina-tion of the student activity fee.

I understand that having a sense of community with other students fosters a productive and collabora-tive learning environment.

I also understand that one of the ways universities compete for new students is via the level of “campus involvement”—the availability of

clubs and organizations suited to niche interests.

As students, we pay tuition and fees and for room and board. These funds all go towards foster-ing campus involvement. Housing and Dining alone hosts activities for students within various living communities to get to know each other better.

The remaining $450,000 in SA’s budget comes from the Office of the Provost, which is presumably funded by our tuition. I am certain that without the extra $350,000, SA could adequately fulfill its present duties: hosting Homecom-ing and Spring Fest, and the ensu-ing austerity requested of student organizations would cause them no great hardship.

A perusal of the minutes from an SA senate meeting reveals a majority of funds are spent on food for meetings or events which are explicitly social in nature, such as Christmas parties. If students are generally interested in the top-ic of the meeting, they will attend of their own volition.

Bribing students to come to meetings with free food is effec-tive, but do students there for the food pay that much attention or contribute that much to the meet-ing? I would argue they don’t.

I am a very involved student. I have certainly consumed my fair share of free Mazzios and cur-rently own more than a reason-able number of free t-shirts. I, like many students, simply have these things because they are there. I am certain I would suffer no great void in my life should I not be pro-vided with umpteen million tail-gate parties. In fact, I have yet to

be convinced of the value of any-thing more intensive sports-wise than intramurals, but I digress.

Tuition is on the rise across the nation, and it is partially because universities are competing for stu-dents on the basis of non-academic criteria like dorms, grounds and activities. I am not advocating for the destruction of any of these—I am certain the other already astro-

nomical sums we pay would more than enable these enhancements of student life to go on unhindered. It would be a benefit to the Univer-sity to be able to say they provide a vibrant campus without an activ-ity fee.

Besides, if push came to shove, we could always promote solidar-ity the European way: by rioting in the streets for lower tuition.

On Nov. 12 residents of Tulsa vot-ed to pass two propositions collec-tively titled “Improve Our Tulsa.” The package passed with over 70 percent of voters supporting it and will bring positive infrastructural improvements to Tulsa.

The goal of this package is to allow Tulsa to maintain and repair current infrastructure without rais-ing taxes. Streets bridges, parks and public safety equipment such as police and fire equipment are all on the list to receive repairs. Such repairs will aid Tulsa’s revitaliza-tion efforts.

These propositions were pre-ceded by over nine months of pub-lic meetings with extensive input from city residents with the goal of understanding what the residents of Tulsa felt was vital and should be included in this city improve-ment package of 918 million dol-lars.

By gathering input from resi-dents, this package will be able to

better provide the repairs that Tul-sa’s population is looking for. This specific tailoring greatly helped the two propositions gain voter support.

A full 70 percent of Improve Our Tulsa is to be dedicated to re-pairing bridges and streets.

This makes Improve Our Tulsa the largest single street repair ini-tiative in Tulsa’s history, some-thing for Tulsa to be proud of.

Street repairs began in Tulsa in 2008 after the Fix Our Streets ini-tiative. Now that this package has been passed, such street repairs will continue, and, in some areas, projects will be accelerated.

“It’s important for us to know that what we’re talking about here are basic investments to keep our city facilities in good care,” said former Tulsa mayor Rodger Ran-dle, according to the Tulsa World. “We’re not talking about anything exotic or whatever, when we’re talking about maintaining the ba-sic infrastructure of our city, we’re really talking about saving money because repairs delayed are repairs made more expensive.”

In addition to such jobs, $70 million of the funds are for re-placing fire and police department equipment, which will help make Tulsa a safer place.

Also affected are Tulsa’s animal shelter, the Tulsa Zoo, the Central Library, River Parks and over thir-ty neighborhood parks.

“This package … helps police

and fire and provides great ameni-ties to attract young families and population to Tulsa, like the li-brary, the zoo—important aspects of cultural and quality of life of our city,” said former mayor Kathy Taylor.

The funding for this package comes in two parts, with bonds and sales tax. Counterintuitively, taxes will not be raised.

The way this is able to hap-pen is that Tulsa’s sales tax was scheduled to decrease by 1.167

percent. Proposition 2 lessened this decrease by 1.1 percent. Now the sales tax will only go down 0.067 percent, and the additional revenue will go towards funding Improve Our Tulsa.

Proposition 3 will raise ad-ditional funds for Improve Our Tulsa through its authorization of general obligation bonds, a type of municipal bond that allows the city to pay back the loan through public tax revenues, in the amount of $355 million.

“Tulsa voters made it clear that they support continued improve-ment in our community,” Tulsa Regional Chamber President Mike Neal said, according to the Tulsa World. “From the beginning, the Improve Our Tulsa campaign has been about addressing critical in-frastructure and initiatives that keep Tulsa growing.”

Improve Our Tulsa is an impor-tant step in improving Tulsa and preparing the city for a brighter and better future.

opinionthe Collegian : 9 18 november 2013

Improve Our Tulsa important for city progress

Activity fees not needed by SA for student orgs

470

88

37.33

34.87

34.6

29.7

27.95

23.9

23.4

148.95

Improve Our Tulsa Propositions 2 & 3: $918.7 million total (values in millions of dollars)

Street rehab

Street widening

Police Dept.

Ciy parks

Fire Dept.

Public transit

Bridges

Planning/economic development

Bike/pedestrian infrastructure

Other

SA does not need student activity fees and should cut back on what it provides to organizations.

KiMBerly pOFFStaff Writer

Through sales tax revenue, Tulsa’s administration is setting out to improve the city’s infrastructure.

MOrGan KrueGerApprentice Editor

In the two propositions that make up Improve Our Tulsa, almost a billion dollars will be raised through the sales tax to fund infrastructure and public works projects. The graph above shows the money allotted to different parts of the budget by the measure.

Graphic by Jill Graves

Graphic by Caroline Kohlhagen

According to Amnesty Interna-tional, “Saudi Arabia is the only country in the world in which women are not allowed to drive.”

Al Jazeera reports that more than 15,000 people have shown support for a petition advocating for Saudi women’s right to drive. This was before the Oct. 26 cam-paign in which approximately 60 women protested the ban by film-ing themselves driving in Saudi Arabia.

At least 16 of them were stopped by police and were forced to wait until their male guardians could come pick them up. Before they could go, they were made to

pledge not to drive again.Although Saudi Arabia does not

specifically ban women from driv-ing, it refuses to issue driver’s li-censes to women.

However, all of the women who participated in the Oct. 26 cam-paign had driver’s licenses ob-tained abroad.

Recently, a Kuwaiti woman was arrested on the Saudi Arabian bor-der, because she was attempting to drive her incapacitated, diabetic father to the hospital. According to the Kuwait Times, the woman is still in custody.

Saudi reporter Tariq Al-Mubarak was arrested for sup-porting the movement. His friends were informed they could pick him up, but upon their arrival, they were detained and questioned in-stead. He was finally released on Nov. 3, having been detained for over a week.

Al Jazeera reports that, in ad-dition to being unable to move about freely, women in Saudi Ara-bia “need permission from a male guardian to travel, work or marry. They are also expected to wear a headscarf and an abaya, a black

cloak covering the body.” Jasmine Bager, a Saudi woman, addressed the abaya in a Time article, indi-cating that wearing an abaya in the hot desert makes it impossible to walk anywhere.

And women cannot go any-where after dark, when it is cooler, without a male guardian.

She also mentions that there is, “no form of acceptable public transportation available for wom-en today.”

Although taxis are an option, Bager suggests that they are far from ideal, “since the common view is that the expat drivers tend to flirt with their passengers, and the Saudi cab drivers seem to gos-sip to their friends about the fe-male passenger’s family name.”

Bager also mentions that “(a) common story was of a lone woman standing at her parked car, holding the car keys and her dying child—as no man was able to come in time to take her to the emergency room.”

However, many Saudi women do not want to drive. According to Haaretz, an Israeli newspaper, about 150 Saudi women have

started a Facebook group dedicat-ed to supporting the laws that keep women from driving.

A Saudi man, Ahmed Abdel-Raheem, blogging for The Guard-ian, suggests that according to an informal survey of Saudi women he conducted, “134 (out of 170) respondents said female driving is not a necessity and that it opens the door for sexual harassment…some also fear that it gives husbands a chance to betray…Even women who supported driving…stressed that their support has conditions.

Crucially they stipulated that there must be laws that deter men against sexual harassment…” Es-sentially, Abdel-Raheem is argu-ing that women do not want to drive not because they would not like more freedom, but because they perceive men as incapable of not committing sexual assault.

However, many Saudi men sup-port the movement. According to the Kuwait Times, “A growing number of men are quietly helping steer the campaign, risking their jobs and social condemnation…men [play] a key role in helping wives, sisters and female friends

to enjoy what they believe is a fun-damental right. They have helped protect female drivers by forming packs of two or three cars to sur-round them and ward off potential harassment.”

According to Amnesty Interna-tional’s 2013 Saudi Arabia report, “Women continued to face dis-crimination in law and practice, and were inadequately protected against domestic and other gen-der-based violence … Discrimina-tory rules relating to marriage and divorce appeared to cause some women to remain trapped in vio-lent and abusive relationships.”

Along these lines, there is ma-jor concern that one of the reasons women in Saudi Arabia have such big problems with violence is that they are unable to drive away: some women cannot go anywhere unless their abuser takes them.

No one is saying that Saudi women should be required to drive themselves—just that they should not be discriminated against be-cause of their gender.

Women should absolutely have the same freedom of mobility as men.

Saudi women should have freedom of mobilityGaining the right to drive would be a first step towards more equal rights for women in Saudi Arabia.

tara GriGsOnStudent Writer

more flights into the library.Sierra Forrest, our guide, took

us down a long corridor with walls completely covered in mirrors. She told us that this is the Hall of Mirrors. “What we want all of our students to do is to walk through these mirrors and symbolically see Jesus,” she said.

Symbolism plays an important part in ORU’s design conceit, as does Christian doctrine. Sierra told us that the Graduate Center is representative of the Temple of Solomon. Cityplex Towers, the trio of golden buildings adja-cent to ORU’s campus and origi-nally owned by the University, have heights corresponding to the

height, width and length of Noah’s Ark. The fountain in front of the Graduate Center is symbolic of God’s word flowing out into the world.

Next we were shown into the university’s chapel. Christ’s Cha-pel, as it is called, is large, white and oddly angled. In keeping with the university’s symbolism, this is meant to bring to mind the tents used in founder Oral Roberts’ nationwide revivals. “He did so much ministry in tents. Wherever they could set up a tent he would do a healing ministry or revival,” our guide said.

The Chapel contains enough seating to accommodate all of ORU’s 3,403 students. It must, as all full-time ORU students are required to attend Chapel on Wednesday and Friday at 11:00 a.m.

After being shown through a sample dorm room and a large, spacious student center contain-ing the largest TV in the state, we were shown the Prayer Tower. The Prayer Tower is the most unique piece of architecture on ORU’s campus. A saucer-shaped observa-

tion deck is pierced by the tower’s main body, culminating in an eter-nally-burning flame at the Tower’s peak.

The Prayer Tower’s lower level contains a silent chapel, where students come to pray quietly or check out a small, private prayer room. At the far end of the chapel is a wooden cross. Here students can write their troubles onto small pieces of paper and “leave them at the Cross,” both literally and sym-bolically.

Sierra said that everything left at the cross is prayed over by ORU’s chaplains. The ORU community is expected to be very supportive of each other. Sierra told us that there are chaplains and academic

advisors on each floor of ORU’s dorms, looking after the spiritual and academic well-being of the students.

The observation deck towers over the rest of ORU’s campus. In-spirational music plays softly, and both tourists and students are in-vited to walk around the observa-tion deck and prayerfully reflect on the words of Oral Roberts, printed in seven different places on and around the circular walkway.

From the observation deck can be seen all the splendor offered by Oral Roberts University’s campus. Statues, gardens and architecture form a uniquely beautiful campus, especially when seen from the vantage point of the Prayer tower.

The lifestyle expected of ORU’s students is much more strict than that of most other schools. All stu-dents must sign an “Honor Code Pledge,” stating that they will, among other things, abstain from tobacco, drugs and alcohol.

The honor code also states that the student must “not engage in or attempt to engage in any illicit, unscriptural sexual acts, which include any homosexual activity

and sexual intercourse with one who is not (their) spouse through traditional marriage of one man and one woman.” ORU also has a dress code, although it has been relaxed in recent years.

These policies have garnered much criticism among those who feel that the university’s rules are outdated and arbitrary, and may serve as a deterrent for many stu-dents from enrolling. For others, however, these rules are a matter of course.

For students, ORU’s draw is mostly religious. “I’m a Christian, and I wanted an education that would give me teachings from a biblical worldview,” said Nathan Tift, an ORU student. He, like many students, was drawn to ORU by its religious affiliations.

Another student, Bear Britt, said that ORU was not his first choice, but that God told him to apply. “As I was sitting there with the ACT website filling in all my informa-tion, I heard a whisper in my ear, saying that ‘you need to go ahead and select Oral Roberts University as well,’” Britt said.

A few days later, Britt got a phone call from the university requesting his transcript. After spending some time in prayer, he realized that God was calling him to attend Oral Roberts University.

Despite the differences in our campus’ cultures and our long-standing basketball rivalry, ORU’s students seem not to harbour any animosity toward TU. “It’s a won-derful university just down the road, honestly,” said Bear.

Sophomore Khari Johnson agreed, “I don’t really hear any-thing negative about it. Awesome school, and we’ve got some rival-ry when it comes to sports.”

While the strict Christian life-style and highly moralistic honor code may seem overwhelming to some, ORU is a well-regarded university, especially among many Christian communities. Drawing students from 50 states and 72 countries, Oral Roberts University is a special place to those who call it home.

the Collegian : 1018 november 2013

From ORU, cover

ORU’s campus contains some of the most memorable landmarks in Tulsa. Top: ORU’s prayer tower contains a silent chapel, an observation deck and a perpetually burning flame at the top. Top-middle: The nearby Cityplex towers were originally owned by the university. Their heights correspond to the height, width and length of Noah’s Ark. Middle-left: The fountain in front of the Graduate Center represents the word of God pouring out into the world. It also has a flame constantly burning at its center. Middle-right and bottom-left: The Graduate Center is one of the main hubs of activity on ORU’s campus, containing the university library and the president’s office. This building is meant to represent the Temple of Solomon. Bottom-right: Christ’s Chapel is intended to look like the tents that Oral Roberts preached in before he founded the university.

“Statues, gardens and architecture form a uniquely beautiful campus.”

All photos by Kyle Walker, Olivia Blankenship / Collegian

the Collegian : 11 18 november 2013

the State-run media18 november 2013

State-Runthe

mediaShut up and consume your mass media like a good boy.

Left: A rare Culturalappropriationmander was spotted in the Pearl District, where the species is now living quite comfortably. Right: A lost Stetsonchu lurks on 11th and Yale. Scientists say Stetsonchu evolves into Tengallonsaur. Reports are unconfirmed. Wilkins claims that these varieties, among others, were created by the same scientists responsible for the cloned trees on TU’s campus.

Graphics by Anna Bennett

TU football opts for an equally meaningful and less strenuous alternative to the planned match against Marshall.

MattheW MaGerKurthVirtual Football Expert

Hurricane passes on football game

In light of their recent aversion to winning, the football team report-edly “didn’t feel like playing” Thursday night against Marshall, deciding instead to settle the match in an alternate contest.

“I mean, we’re just tired and we want to go home,” said offen-sive lineman Phaul Teeblocks. “At some point, there’s just no point.”

It’s been a rough season for the Golden Hurricane. The weary players, further demoralized by lit-erally zero fans showing up for the game, petitioned for an alternative showdown.

The captains and coaches of both teams met and decided that the game would be played on NCAA Football 2014 for Xbox 360. By reporting the points

scored in the game to the press, the two teams were able to simulate real-time scoring updates. Accord-ing to cornerback P’leez Dontro, it was “the most fun we’ve had play-ing football all year.”

“Yeah, we feel like this is a bold move, we’ll see how it works out for us,” said head coach Bill Blan-kenship.

The pizza-heavy evening with the Thundering Herd turned heated when the referees called unsportsmanlike conduct on de-fensive lineman Rob Stoofs when he took three slices of pizza on his first time through the line. A brief fight started but was quickly bro-ken up, and Tulsa took the penalty on the video game. Citing that “we need a good, clean video game,” the referees kept their flags handy, but were reportedly also partaking in the pizza and beer.

At halftime, the stadium filled with students dying to hear the band’s Beyoncé medley. After the marching show, the audience headed home and the players good-naturedly returned to the locker rooms to finish the game.

In light of the success of Oral Roberts University’s required student honor code, the University of Tulsa has decided to adapt its own honor code pledge. Please read and fill out this form and return to your RA by the end of the semester.

1. I PLEDGE to never sue the University of Tulsa, any of its fac-ulty or students, or any of its affiliates, especially Sodexo. I will never badmouth Sodexo because of food poisoning or human rights violations.

2. I PLEDGE to never smoke hookah on or off the campus of the University of Tulsa. I will never carry my shisha around in order to impress my friends. I will stand at least 25 feet (7.62 meters) away from any corridor or doorway when I smoke cigarettes. I understand and believe that second-hand smoke does indeed exist.

3. I PLEDGE to not dirty rush any innocent freshmen, with the understanding that my Chubbies and Crokies privileges may be re-voked after said infraction.

4. I PLEDGE to attend every University of Tulsa Golden Hurri-cane football game, knowing full well that my positive attitude and team spirit greatly influence the performance of the athletes.

5. I PLEDGE to embrace wherever housing places me to live, whether that be in a hotel downtown or the bathroom stalls of the John.

6. I PLEDGE to tithe at least, but not limited to, one-tenth of my annual income each year to the University of Tulsa. If, in the highly improbable case that I be unemployed, I surrender myself as an in-dentured servant to the Physical Plant.

7. I PLEDGE to actually do my course evaluations. But seriously. It’ll only take me ten minutes, and it actually matters, so like, I’ll do them. REALLY, I’m serious, you guys. I’m going to do my course evals. I will not forget to do my course evals this time. But actually.

Signature (in blood): __________________________________

TU and Marshall settle their Thursday contest with the help of an Xbox rather than athletic prowess. The biggest complaints from players were that there were not enough pepperoni pizzas and that the Bud Light could have been colder.

Photo by David Kennedy / Graphic by Anna Bennett

#

“Danger” takes T-Town by storm

Impress your picky, obnoxious relatives AND have a little time for yourself with this easy pump-kin pie recipe! For best effect, bake this pie right before your company arrives.

What You’ll Need:

1 package cream cheese2 cups canned pumpkin1 cup sugar1 handle of gin1 egg plus 2 egg yolks, beaten1 cup half-and-half1 box of KleenexA brave face1/4 cup (1/2 stick) melted butter1 teaspoon vanilla extract1 set of ugly dishes1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon1/4 teaspoon ground ginger1/4 teaspoon salt1 oz. tequila1 lime wedge1 package pre-made pie doughWhipped cream1 fifth of vodka

Directions:1. Combine cream cheese,

pumpkin filling and sugar in a large mixing bowl. Mix until con-sistent.

2. When the filling starts to re-mind you too much of the bland and falsely sweet relationship you have with your parents, take the handle of gin into the nearest bath-room and drink all of it.

3. Now that the filling has had time to settle, separate 2 eggs from their yolks and combine with one whole egg, then beat together. Why? Well, why the hell do you do anything, really? Why do you work so hard to impress your in-laws when you know they will never forgive you for losing your job? Why do you bother putting on pants in the morning? Just beat the damn eggs. Put the shitty egg mixture in with the shitty pumpkin mixture.

4. Regain your composure slightly and add the half-and-half, making sure to check that it is indeed half-and-half, not just ex-pired milk.

5. When the half-and-half re-minds you too much of your ex-husband’s half-assed attempts to preserve your marriage, take the box of Kleenex and lock yourself in your closet for an hour.

6. Drunk-call your ex from col-lege and say lots of things you’ll regret later. This step is extra ef-fective if you end up on speaker phone drunkenly talking about “that one time behind the stadium” in front of his wife and kids.

7. Put on a brave face and si-lently leave the closet, pushing your shame further and further into your subconscious.

8. Melt ½ stick of butter. Add to filling mixture alongside vanilla.

9. When the vanilla reminds you of the way your ex-husband used to describe your personality to his girlfriend Kandy, remove the set of ugly dishes from the cabinets and throw them all against the

kitchen wall.10. Leave the dish fragments

there for several hours. Secretly hope that Kandy steps on them with her stupid whore feet when she comes to dinner.

11. Combine cinnamon and gin-ger in a superfluously tiny bowl. Add to mixture.

12. I guess you should probably preheat the oven now or whatever. So do that. Imagine putting your ex-husband’s head in there along-side the pie.

13. While the oven heats, take a shot of tequila, adding salt and fin-ishing with a lime if you’re feeling extra classy.

14. Dump the pie filling into a pre-made crust, because dammit, you don’t have time to make crust from scratch. Who do they think you are, Martha Fucking Stewart?! Judgemental bitches.

15. Bake the damn pie for an hour.

16. While the pie bakes and then cools, clean up the giant mess you made in the kitchen, secretly hat-ing yourself for even now refusing to lose face in front of your rela-tives.

17. Put as much whip cream as you want on the pie.

18. Distribute the fifth of vodka throughout the house in small, subtle containers so you can drink all night without your relatives no-ticing.

19. Get ready to enjoy your holiday dinner! Happy Fucking Thanksgiving.

Perfect Pumpkin Pie!

Jesse Keipp and Lizzie Connor

A loss in the mayoral race has not stopped Buzz “Danger” Wilkins’ attempts to change the face of Tulsa.

Readers from last week may re-member the enigmatic mayoral candidate Buzz “Danger” Wilkins, whose promises included the ban-ning of rain and the establishment of public works projects dedicated to anatomical correctness.

Few, however, have had the chance to speak directly to the man responsible for the Wilkins Initia-tive. I sat down with Wilkins at his estate and discussed his plans for the future.

In the cozy halls of the can-didate’s estate, dubbed “Danger

Manor”, Wilkins expressed en-thusiasm at the number of votes he received in the election. The 14 voters who voted “yes” to his campaign for mayor constituted a hefty 1400% of what his manager predicted.

“The fact that 14 whole people want me to be King of Tulsa makes me more committed to my grand plans than ever,” insisted Wilkins between bites of squirrel jerky.

He leaned in closer and finally admitted his ultimate plan: “I’ve convinced the northeast corner of Woodward Park to secede and make me their overlord.”

While the details of this shock-ing political maneuver are as shaky as the ex-painter’s tweaked-out gaze, several elements of the new city are already in motion. “We’re going to call it Dangertown!” ex-claimed the new self-appointed

leader of the miniscule town. He congratulates his sound decision to claim for his own an area so concentrated with squirrel pelts.

Wilkins went on to explain in a babbling stream of nonsense that his “creations,” pokemon-style abominations styled after Wild West headgear, are already wan-dering the city streets. Wilkins, who is also a failed Western nov-elist, admits that they were never supposed to leave Dangertown, but hopes that the rest of Tulsa likes the critters.

King Danger, as Mr. Wilkins now wishes to be known, then stopped mid-sentence, scratched the rabbit-shaped scar on his left forearm, then asked if I wanted to see the pink lemonade fountain in his pleasure garden.

This reporter respectfully de-clined.

Fraser Kastner

anna BennettDanger-ites

anna BennettA regular Martha Stewart