38 earthsoft-deteriorating-culture

Making earth little softer

Earthsoft Foundation of GuidanceEdge-Aggressive-Reliable-Trust-Honesty-Soft-Obedient-Fun-Transparent


Earthsoft Foundation of Guidance (EFG) has uploaded following presentations at http://myefg.in/downloads.aspxBe mentor use your education, knowledge & experience to contribute for a social cause & do conduct free training seeking help of existing platforms. Kindly share with your friends•Motivation for higher study, Planning for study, Education guidance, Career guidance, Career available after SSC & HSC•Personality development – 3 files •How to prepare resume, Tips to attend interview successfully•Religion related –To understand basic religion, Do & Don’t tips•Health related - Be vegetarian, Be healthy, Manage health•Corporate - Project management, Assertiveness, Ownership, Effective communication, Leadership, Be entrepreneur•Finance - To avoid speculation in stock market•Social - Women empowerment, Choosing life partner, conflict resolution, stop ragging, stop alcohol, snakebite treatment

About us

http://myefg.in/downloads.aspx


• Value of a person• Culture & its elements

• Religion• Food habits

• Women abuse• Marriage related issues• Expensive marriage• Inter-caste marriage• Disengagement• Divorce• Single family• Successful marriage• Religion & rites• Commitment & Oath

Index


The value of person depends upon• Skills attained• Knowledge acquired• Money earned• Assets build• Good deeds executed• Relations maintained• Love spread• Culture demonstrated and • Behavior exhibited!

Value of a person


• The word culture, meaning "to cultivate“. • Culture: The complex whole which includes

mind, style, norms of behavior, behavior, codes of manners, language, religion, dress, rituals, way of business, systems of belief, knowledge, belief, attitude, art, morals, law, custom, and any other capabilities and habits acquired by a member of society

• Culture - "the way of life for an entire society.“


• A common way of understanding culture is to see it as consisting of four elements that are "passed on from generation to generation by learning alone“

• Values guide about what in life seems important• Norms consist of expectations of how people will behave in various situations. • Institutions are the structures of a society within which values and norms are

transmitted. • Artifacts—things, or aspects of material culture derive from a culture's values

and norms



What is Culture?What is Culture?

• Culture is the way of life of a group of people.


ElementsElements


ElementsElements


ReligionReligion

- a system of beliefs that goes beyond human powers


Food habitsVegetarian•Rice, Wheat, Cereals•Vegetables & curryNon-Vegetarian•Seafood•Meat-however, cows are considered sacred by Hindus, many of whom are vegetarian

Other•Masala-spices•Tea-common drink


Women abuse•Observations – Ridiculously higher rise in women abuse & rape at home, road, travel & work places

•Impact –•Deterioration of dignity of society and nation•Miserable lives of victim & family members after the event

•Painful, unstable and panic lives of the victim and family members

•Disturbed social environment


Women abuse – Root causes•Pathetic & poor economical situation•Men have earned huge money due to exponential economical growth, got them muscle power, ego & arrogance

•Higher education leads to career orientation leads to relatively higher exposure & freedom

•Tendency of showiness, dressing style exposing women body, has increased

•Negative & sexy image of women as an object projected on media

•Ignorance of parents•Lack of education & guidance to children


Women abuse•Immediate & essential actions

•Stringent laws & strict Implementation•Quick justice•Stricter censorship, to be extraordinary cautious about image being projected

•Social pressure, better dressing style•Spreading education, awareness, spirituality & religious values, enhancing political will

•Legal & protected prostitution•Ownership & responsibilities of security•Awareness of abilities & ambitions•Use of technologies for alerts & avoiding event


Women abuse - Dressing


Women abuse – better dressing


Marriage related issues


Expensive marriage•Observations – Expenses during marriages have gone up multifold due to lavish celebrations

•Also huge dowry being demanded•Harassment to bride if expectations of huge dowry, lavish marriage & others are not fulfilled

•Impact –•Middle class & poor families face embarrassment & exploitation

•Compatible match is often missed•Ego within family members due to richness•Poor people think girl child as a curse


Expensive marriage•Root causes –

•Simple living-High thinking concept demolishing quickly

•People have earned huge money due to exponential economical growth, thus ego & arrogance have increased multifold

•Expensive marriage mean status symbol•Change from saving to purchasing economy•Tendency of showiness, greed for name, fame & recognition has increased

•Huge capital investments so expectation of settlement (flat, car, etc)


Expensive marriageImmediate & essential steps

•Educate - Simple celebration movement•Encourage simplicity however everlasting marriages

•Depict the importance of savings•Monks & leaders to guide society effectively•Leaders to set the examples of simplicity


Expensive & simple marriage


Inter-caste marriageObservations – Extremely serious trend about rise in inter-caste marriages is observedImpact – •Change of culture for current and next generation, mainly religion from Jain to non-Jain, & food habit of Vegetarian to non-vegetarian•Less probability of successful & sustainable marriage•Failed marriage results in

•Widely disturbed family stability & happiness•No ownership of children


Inter-caste marriage – Root causes•Higher education leading to career orientation & exposure to industry, closeness with gender of opposite sex, working & on road at late hours

•Self independent, freedom of thoughts & act•Lack of understanding of values & rites of Jainism

•Temptation, curiosity, attraction & anticipation of better culture

•Lack of deep thinking about repercussion due to change of culture

•Wanting to settle in metros•Excessive mobile use, late arrival at home, etc


Inter-caste marriageImmediate & essential steps• Aggressive movement through education • Serious impacts of cross culture on current &

future generations•Mainly on religious matters, food habits, upbringing, values & rites and living style

•Lack of participation in various social functions due to heterogeneous cross relationships

• Improved upbringing, values, religious & spiritual rites at home

• Convincing equally happy life at Non-Metro cities


DisengagementObservations• Steeper rise in disengagement after

engagement ceremony, prior to marriageImpact• Delay of marriages of both bride & groom later• Social insult even if no mistake• Disturbed families• One suffers at no mistake of other


Disengagement – Root causesLack of following between parents and children •Affirmative & assertive effective communication•Trust & transparencyMature way of communication, unreasonable demand and mishandling of the situationExposure of true however hidden situationUndermined or over spelled expectationsLack of early day phenomenon of references, ownership & trustPressure & hurry while finalising the marriageImmature communication between bride & groomUpbringing, cultivating values, rites & spirituality


Disengagement

Immediate & essential stepsEncourage dialogue between parent & children• Expectations about life partner & consensus• Explanation & agreement over methodology• Discussions over Dos and Don’ts• Sharing good & bad case studies


• Divorce or the dissolution of marriage is the final termination of a marital union, canceling the legal duties and responsibilities of marriage and dissolving the bonds of matrimony between the partners!

• As of 2011, divorce rate in India is 1.01 for every thousand marriages annually, is too high

Divorce


Divorce

Observations• Day by day ridiculously increasing higher rate of

divorceImpact• Disturbed families• Disturbed lives of husband, wife, and children• Complex social and economical matters


Divorce – Root causes•Non-compatibility•Quick and/or forced decision during marriage•Era of higher education, career orientation, economic development, independence and women empowerment

•Mismatch of priorities, bringing up the children, execution methodologies

•Too much parental interference•Lack of or reducing social pressure•Lack of understanding, Methodologies differs•Missing on Loving, Caring, Sharing, Giving•Different values •Own world – Ignoring & not sharing time•Lack of approval from family (for love marriage)•Above results in Disregard & Distrust, cycle continues


Divorce

Immediate & essential steps• Counseling centers• Education & awareness• Religious & spiritual spreading, increasing

patience• Training to weight results of fight & compromise • Sharing case study of sacrifices, respect,

compromises, and benefits of successful marriages


ReasonsCategory Reason

Social Dowry harassment, Exploitation, Conservative approachUnbearable mental and physical tortureAcceptance of divorced daughters, Change of viewsDINKS (double income no kids) couples Downfall of Joint family systemMisunderstanding of Woman empowerment & equality

Personality Non compatibility in social, economical, intellect statusLack of adaptability, lack of patienceDomination, egoistic nature, Listen – serve to me attitudeExtramarital affairs, Western culture influence

Finance Ability to be on own, Financial freedomGrowth of individualism, High salariesDisputes over managing finance, I can do it better attitude

Professional Work-life imbalance, Professional rivalry

Behavior Lack of ethics and morals, Fashionable life styleLack of affection, Ignorance, Insulting, Disrespect


• We hide the things……• We ignore……• We mislabel……• We agree on irrelevant matters…• We believe our loved one will change after

marriage

Before marriage


• “You are just made for me”• “You aren’t the man/woman I married”.

• “I want you to be my partner for all the births”• “You seem different now”.

• “I am so lucky, feel like in heaven”• “It isn’t the same as when we were dating”.

• “I trust you”• “You cheated me”.

Voice before & after


• Intellectual gap• Physical, age-wise, health related, sex related• Comfort, Fun, Materialistic, Financial instability• Spiritual differences• Social life style• Ego• Missing on expectations• Ability not to accommodate varieties• Methodology differs slightly• Twisted & distorted facts or inputs• Wrong impression / prejudice• Expectations to be ideal!

Incompatibility & reasons


To avoid • Unhealthy life, psychological madness• Loneliness & unhappiness• Social insult over ability to manage• Lesser combined income• Risk of suicide for both & children• Shorter life expectancies

• For children• Suffer physical health• Risk of school failure• Psychological distress & mental illness• Miss on guidance & developing

Avoid divorce


• Think strategically about solution• Communicate & have a dialogue• Discuss, don’t quarrel• Clarify & Apologize if mistaken• Start clean slate & fresh• Enhance understanding• Set the guidelines if needed• Understand before being understood• Avoid to be misunderstood, make a point• Do not involve many• Acknowledge and respect individual identity• Avoid compromised & confused situation

First hand solution


• Be “REAL” & realistic• Plan for outing• Enhance listening abilities• Express issues, wish and needs honestly• Understand viewpoints sincerely• Respect one another as peers & friends• Constructive resolutions build trust, follow those• Maintain a diary jotting down own mistakes

First hand solution


• Unable to articulate all issues at one time• Unable to convince & conclude who is wrong?• Unable to address ego• Inability to stand on own• Social pressure• Deep responsibility of children & serious views

not to ruin their lives• Unclear answer to What next?• If views till in favor to continue, not to cut thread• Compromising nature & patience• Hope is the strategy!!! (cannot be!)

Fight but marriage under hold


• Never try to straighten dog’s tail• Do not hit head against wall• Weight the event…would you remember after

what duration? A day..a week..a month or never• Know.....who matters• Acknowledgement is 1st step of improvement• Keep cool & calm, grow and behave!

Tips


• Lifetime to know each other• People do not really know each other well• Continue applying corrections & keep aligning• Be flexible – unforeseen events will happen.• Be prepared for change – people change,

situations shift, relationships take on new dimensions, Couples can cope & adapt

• Have a positive attitude.• Express positive comments most of the time.• Criticism about inadequacies eliminates

emotional space.

Accept totally


• Commitment as a symbol, not as a contract• Equal focus on win-win, always!• Trust which offers closeness, fluent

communication & synergistic relationship• Mutual goals & objectives can be achieved with

deep support• Continuous improve• Timely communication & responsiveness• Involvement of partners with each other , trust &

respect for each other, must be magnified

Key element


Single familyObservations• Most of the couples want to stay separate to

their parents• Bride keeps enquiring “how many dust bins do

you have at home?” (referring to old people)Impact• Next generation missing great upbringing by

grand parents, depicting values, spiritual & religious rites, and inculcating regular study

• Learning of tasty recipes from mother-in-law and kitchen related activities

• Helpless & unattended parents


Single family

Root causes• Selfishness of current generation• Interference by parents, not guidance• Non-supporting in-laws• Ego & non-understanding• Generation gap• Phobia of privacy• Economical independent parents


Single family

Immediate & essential stepsSpreading awareness of benefits of joint families• Transfer of knowledge & experience• Availability of guidance and second view• Upbringing of next generation• Deep love, affection bring happiness, cultured

environment of respect and dignity• Availability of expertise• Being social, not lonely


Partnering

Environment Culture

Way of lifeMethodologies

PeopleFamilies

Partnering

LovingLovingCaringCaring

SharingSharing

TrustTrust

Transparency

Transparency

RespectRespect

HonestyHonesty DignityDignity


Successful marriage

Reasons for successful marriage• Common skills• Good emotional & physical health• High self esteem• High education level• High social status• Pressure from society & kids


• Long term relationship & stability• Better ritual culture due to common & deep

understanding, supportive for next generation• Improved family relationship• Increased ownership, higher commitments• Feeling of proud of relationship• Feel of satisfaction & delight from peaceful &

happy environment• Financially wealthy & successful• Active participation for function & celebration• Increased morale & no conflicts

Gain from successful marriage


• Trust, Communication, Intimacy, Sense of humor, Sharing tasks, a sense of belonging

• Daily exchanges (meal, shared activity, hug, call, touch, notes, etc)

• Sharing common goals and interests• Giving space to grow without feeling insecure• Assurances of commitment• Concern and careIf these qualities are missing, the relationship will

erode as resentment withdrawal, abuse, neglect, and dishonesty, replacing by pain!

What keeps it ON


• Bargaining – compromise with respect & dignity (deal for both, remember marriage is not a deal!)

• Agreement as a gift (without resentment)• Coexistence – Agree (to disagree & live with it)The object of marriage = peaceful coexistence• Be totally honest and kind at the same time.• Control negative destructive impulses• Control your anger• Express your deepest fears, hopes, and

emotions and everyday thoughts• Giving, sharing, loving & caring

Happily married life


Observations• Most of the families are unhappy • Main reason being dispute, disagreements and

conflict between parent-children, husband-wife and in-laws

• Issues are social, economical, generation gap, way of living life, freedom, privacy, etc

Impacts• Unhappy life of individuals and thus of society• Poor upbringing of next generation• Restlessness in society• Compromises in living style

Unhappily families


Root causes• Lack of social, spirituality & religious rites &

upbringing, lack of patience & society pressure• Enough money to be independentChild-Parent• Phobia of privacy, impact of western culture• Deep wish of new generation being independent • Generation gap being conservative versus young

generation wanting to do different• Mistrust over ability of young generationHusband-wife• Parental support to girls to be independent

Unhappily families


Solutions• Education, at school and at home..upbringing,

spiritual and religious rites• Enhancing ability of understanding & conflict

resolution• Understanding advantages of staying together• Sharing of knowledge & experiences• Security• Upbringing of next generation• Emotional attitude and respect• Gratitude

Unhappily families


Summary-18 Sins


Summary-18 Sins


Summary – 9 Holy points


Summary – 9 Holy points


Serious issues


Observation•Following hobbies and later turning to be habits, are being cultivated and rising at tremendous rate among youngsters & professionals

•It is spreading across India including even small towns, not just city areas like early days

Impact•All these bad habits damage health terribly•Social health is too deteriorating•Its heavy & continuous expense•Next generation will completely be spoiled•Tension, instability of family members

Serious issues


Root causes• In-appropriate sources of earning huge money• Company one needs to keep for such business• Greed for name, fame, power & money• Curiosity, peer pressure and temptation• Lack of assertiveness & affirmativenessImmediate & essential steps• Education & awareness• Spiritual & religious rites• Sharing inspirational stories• Sharing disadvantages of bad company• Watchdog and pressure from family members

Serious issues


• 24% of global warming due to gas emission• 760 million tons of grain fed to animals PA• 16 pounds of grain to produce 1 pound of beef• Animal products has harmful saturated fat • Animal disease transmission due to proximity or

consumption• Cholesterol in non-veg causes heart disease• Non-lean red meat increases risk of cancers of

the lung, oesophagus, liver, and colon• Too much protein stresses liver & kidneys• Bacterial infection (Bird Flu , mad cow disease)• To produce 1 kg beef 12009Gal water is needed

Stop eating Non-veg food


Stop Smoking


There are effects almost on every organ of the bodyBrain damage Stomach ulcers

Stoke Irregular beat

Blurred vision Muscle weakness

Slurred speech Intestinal ulcers

Bleeding throat Infertility

Breathing may stop Liver failure

Heart disease Osteoporosis

Liver disease-cirrhosis

Obesity – weight gain

Stop Alcohol


Alcohol-Consequences

Vomiting Driving accidents Loss of inhibitions

Headache Hangover Loss of control

Imbalance Fighting Swing - Loss of control


I commit to myself • Will follow the highest standards of honesty,

integrity, personal conduct and ethical values• Will deal with all stake holders in honest,

courteous, respectful and polite manner showing respect

• Will respect to cultural values & rites• Will not share false or misleading information• Will not engage in wrongful deeds & practices,

which corrupt the industries I serve, or damage the business community or society I live

• And finally will take responsibility for my actions

Commitment & Oath


Thank You