How to Boost Your Verbal Communication Skills

7/28/2019 How to Boost Your Verbal Communication Skills

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How to Boost Your Verbal Communication

Skills

Colors have a tremendeous impact on how we perceive the world around us. So do words.

Source:http://pixabay.com/pt/cidade-noite-fonte-constru%C...

The ability to communicate effectively is an art. Words, like colors, can make things more

beautiful. They can "brush" beautiful lines in one's day or life, making it more enjoyable and

pleasant. Like the skilled use of colors and their combination, the good use words and their

combination can vividly convey ideas that can cause people to laugh or to cry. Carefully

thought out words can inspire hope, infuse a downhearted person with the desire to live, or

so profoundly influence someone's mind and heart that he or she will be touched and

determined to achieve nothing less than greatness. What a profound, incredible power - that

of being able to "touch" the most inner feelings of someone, to spark their thoughts and

desires, to transport them in time by making them use their imagination...all without even

needing to do more than to just speak!

Nonetheless, like a knife, such incredible power can be well used or badly used. When badly

used, it can result in deep "cuts" inside - some of them can never be cured. That can happen

with someone that is close to us (like family) or with someone that we have never met. To

illustrate that point, picture the following scene: In a far away land, a family is preparing ameal together - father, mother and children. All of a sudden, an army invades the village and

kills everyone - including the children. Why? It all originated in the order (the words) that the

general, or other, gave in that sense. A simple "do it" or "yes" can mean the difference

between life and death. Great power lies in our mouths! Therefore, it is of great importance

to not only learn how to boost our verbal communication skills, but also to learn to

communicate in an up-building manner, one that people will remember us for, as if we were

great painters able to help them see things in a brighter, more colorful manner. How can you

do that, though? Yes, how can you boost your verbal communication skills?
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Source:http://pixabay.com/pt/closeup-comunica%C3%A7%C3%A3...

"The wise one never says everything he thinks, but he always thinks everything he says." Aristotle

Learn When to Talk

You might be surprised to read the following: the first step to boost your communication

skills is to learn to...be silent! It may seem contradictory, but it really is not. Many people

with good natural abilities and skills concerning verbal communication just talk too much!

They blur their message either by speaking too much or by speaking when they should be

silent, listening. Therefore, the painting comes out grey and/or blurry.

You cannot effectively pass a message, one that causes a real print in someone's mind if,

first, you don't listen to what they need, want or are looking for. If you speak when youshould be listening, your words will be like arrows that are always missing the desired target.

Even if you have a great bow (i.e., natural communication skills) you are just shooting at the

wrong target all the time. Therefore, learn to be silent. That is, don't speak all the time.

Learn to listen and choose carefully the moments to talk. A man that was very famous for his

wisdom and verbal communication skills, King Solomon, once wrote these simple, but

powerful, words that we all should take to heart: "For everything there is an appointed time,

even a time for every affair under the heavens...a time to keep quiet and a time to speak."

(Ecclesiastes 3:1, 7) Yes, learn to distinguish when you should speak and when you should

stay quiet. For example, do not issue an opinion on a subject about which you were not

invited to give your opinion. If you learn to do that, when you are actually invited to provideyour opinion, it will be more valued and you will be seen as a level-headed person. In that
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way, you don't speak as much, but what you do say is much more likely to be taken into

consideration. That is communicating well.

You add value when you help others to see things from a different perspective

Source:http://pixabay.com/pt/arranha-c%C3%A9u-trabalhador...

Tip 1

Listen carefully to people who speak well

Add Value

Communicating well also means to make sure that what we say adds something of value tothe subject under discussion. Saying something that adds nothing further to what has

already been said just makes you look like...someone who doesn't have creativity or

someone that just repeats what others have already said. It is better to not say anything at

all and agree with a valid point of view (when appropriate) than to say something that adds

nothing valuable to the conversation. Remember, there is always much to say about just

about anything. The fact is, though: most of it is neither practical nor really informative; it's

just someone else saying something else about something. What? No one really knows.

Why? Because it's not really important, doesn't add anything else of value. Simply stated: it's

just rambling. Don't be that someone!

What is of value? Normally, what is true and accurate. Be accurate regarding dates, times,

scientific data, news, events, etc. To add something of value it is usually not enough to just

say something is needed, for example. You need to present reasons. Show whysomething is

important or true, show why that information is of value to know. If giving instruction to a

person or to a group (at work or at home, for example), explain not only the why, but also

howa thing is to be done. That type of information is of value. Additionally, in order to add

value, avoid the danger of speculation. Make sure that what you say is clarifying, not

misrepresenting. Inaccuracies will be recognized at some point and that raises questions as

to the authority/truthfulness of the speaker in other points as well. If you lose your

credibility, what you say is of no value and all verbal communication skills you might have

won't be able to compensate for that.
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Considering the aforementioned, what can help you to have more valuable things to add to

conversations and, thus, to boost your communication skills?

Source: http://Velho livro aberto

Tip 2

Some dictionaries list under each word both its synonyms, as well as its antonyms. That canhelp you find not only a variety of words for the same idea, but also different nuances of

meaning.

Reading - An Important Factor

It may come as a surprise that reading can affect your verbal communication skills so much.

Why is that so? The basic reason is that the more you read the more knowledgeable you will

be about different things, realities, cultures, problems, solutions, etc. The more you know,the more things you understand or even master, the better and more effective will your

communication be. You will have more value to add to an ever increasing pool of matters. As

a result, you will feel more confident when you express opinions or provide suggestions,

since you know what you are talking about. Others will also notice that not only do you

choose when to speak more wisely, but also that when you do speak you give insightful and

practical suggestions/opinions. Thus, they will look to you and your suggestions/opinions

more often.

Reading helps boost your communication skills in other areas as well. For example, another

benefit of reading good information regularly is that it can make your vocabulary morevaried and attractive. How? Occasionally, when reading we might come across one word, a

set of words or an expression that is unfamiliar to us. Or we might know the words, but be

unfamiliar with their meaning. When we read, however, the meaning of some words or

expressions can be defined in the text or, even if not, its meaning can sometimes be

understood in the context in which that word is being used. For other words we might have

to consult a dictionary, whether at the moment or later. As mentioned before, this will

broaden your vocabulary. Upon better understanding the meaning of a word or an

expression do not hesitate in using it. If you do so immediately and regularly you - and

others - will notice an improvement in your manner of communicating. Nevertheless, a word

of caution: do not try to impress others by using complicated words. People do not feelattracted to someone they think is a "show off".


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Animals cannot do what you are doing right now. Your ability to read the printed page allows

you by this means to travel to other lands, to meet people whose lives can enrich yours and

to gain practical knowledge that will help you to cope with the concerns of life. With that in

mind, make time to read. The key is not quantity, but regularity. Should you put aside 10 to

15 minutes each day to do some reading, you will be amazed with what you can accomplish.

Obviously, this does not mean that you should accept to read everything. The ability to readalso needs to be used properly. Like eating, reading must be done selectively. Would you eat

food that could poison you? Why, then, read material that can corrupt your mind or heart

(for example, material that could[even if it's only a possibility] corrupt your loyalty to your

wife/husband or family)? It is interesting that King Solomon, already quoted earlier in this

article, once wrote: "As regards anything besides these... take a warning: To the making of

many books there is no end, and much devotion [to them] is wearisome to the flesh."

Ecclesiastes 12:12

There is no lack of good words. When you choose them well, you can paint beautiful scenarios in

your hearers' minds.

Source:http://pixabay.com/pt/jeju-cor%C3%A9ia-beira-mar-c...

Tip 3

Make note of any words that you wish to incorporate in your speech. Do not let more than aday or two pass before you start using them.

Choice of Words

Words are designed to communicate thoughts or ideas from one person's mind to his or her

hearers. This, however, can only be successfully achieved if the speaker selects words that

accurately express his thoughts and that are known and easily identifiable by the hearers. An

effective choice of words does not come easily at first. Even wise King Solomon had to

ponder and made a thorough search, that he might...find the delightful words and the

writing of correct words of truth. (Eccl. 12:9, 10) How interesting that even famous people,

known by their speaking abilities, like this king, ponder in what words to use to pass their

message successfully! So it takes mental effort, search and good judgment to find desirable

words.
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There is no lack of good words. And, as mentioned above in the article, when you employ a

variety of words your speech will be both colorful and meaningful. Nonetheless, that alone

does not mean your verbal communication will automatically be good. Another principle to

verbally communicate well is simplicity. In fact, simplicity is the key to understanding and,

thus, a great aid to the memory. And your ability to effectively pass an idea (communicate

something) is measured by how much people memorize what you say, since if they don't, allyou said was lost. Therefore, choose words that are appropriate and dignifying, but that

everyone listening to you can easily understand. Again, don't try to "show off", to impress

others with your vocabulary! Never underestimate the powerful effect of clear, simple, well-

chosen, truthful words. Simple words that are well chosen convey ideas with great power.

Therefore, for thoughts that you especially want your hearers to remember, favor words

that are simple and sentences that are concise, since they are easier to memorize.

Asking questions is like digging for gold. It was hard work. But the reward was worth it!

Source:http://pixabay.com/pt/charles-christian-nahl-paisa...

How To Improve

Based on the suggestions herein, select one or two (maximum) of the points considered andfocus on working on it/them for three to four weeks in your daily communication (some

points may demand more time). Repeat this process with all the points herein until they

become a natural part of your communication style.

Ask Questions

Questions are powerful tools. They allow you to "pull" out things that are hidden - like

thoughts, ideas and feelings - that you wouldn't know otherwise. They can be compared to

the tools used by gold diggers in old times to search for gold. Yes, they had to dig and work

hard. But the reward was worth it! The same can be said about questions. They allow you to

know what others think about any matter. You need that in order to know exactly what to

say and how to say it. For example, if you are a seller, you need to know not only your

product very well, but also to find out what people expect and want from the type of
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product you sell. Once you know both those things you can effectively talk to your hearer

(possible client) in such a way that your communication will be effective and successful.

Therefore, learn to ask what people think about things and listen to their answers carefully.

That will allow you to define the correct path to follow when it's your turn to say something.

Additionally, when you ask questions and listen attentively to other people's thoughts youtell that person "I am interested in what you think/feel, in what you have to tell me about

that". Do not interrupt. With that you will gain your listener's favor even before you open

your mouth. But you are already communicating something to him or her! That something

will also make him or her to want to hear you when your time to speak comes. Realize,

nevertheless, that not everyone will answer your questions. Don't' get frustrated with that.

Be patient and do not force things. Remember that your silence also communicates ideas to

the other person. Should your reaction be a patient one your silence will say to the other

person that you are respectful. That may move the person to come to view you as a friend in

the future. Or, as a result, the person might get impressed with you and listen to you happily

on a future occasion. That is communicating successfully, wouldn't you say?

There are several different types of questions you can ask. The most effective, however, are

viewpoint questions. Why do you think that is? As the name says, viewpoint questions

normally demand more than a simple "yes" or "no" that really don't allow you to know what

the other person really thinks or feels about something; they prompt the listener to express

his or her opinion about a matter. Here is how you can do it: instead of simply asking your

hearer "do you agree with what happened?" (to which a "yes" or "no" suffices), ask him

"whatdo you think was the cause?" or "howdo you think it could be handled?"

What is Yet to Come

Are you a public speaker, addressing small or large audiences? Do you make presentations

for your work team or in representation of your company? Are you a student that every now

and then has to present your work, or defend a thesis, in front of your classmates and/or

teacher? Or are you just someone who would like to know even more about how to

communicate properly and about how to boost your communication skills - both for the

public or in private? Don't miss the next article dedicated to this theme. It will be a

continuation of this article, and will be entitled "How to Boost Your Verbal Communication

Skills - Part 2". It will address other aspects of effective verbal communication and will also

present aspects to boost verbal communication skills when addressing an audience.

What suggestion or suggestions in this article did you find

more helpful?

How being a good listener affects good comunication The importance of reading to communicate appropriately How important it is to choose what words to use The key role of simplicity in being a good communicator


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How questions are a fundamental tool in the art of passing a message How dictionaries can help The importance of learning when to talk

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This Hub was last updated on April 17, 2013
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How to Boost Your Verbal Communication Skills