Love Systems Insider: Routines and Multiple Thread Theory

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    Love Systems InsiderDate: September 2007

    Routines and Multiple Thread Theory - Tips For When YouRun out of Things to Say

    One of the biggest sticking points guys have once they have learned how to open/approach isawkward pauses when you don't have anything to say or a way to move the conversation

    forward. Nothing destroys your ability to create attraction faster than this.

    From my experience teaching literally hundreds of men at ourbootcamps, I see the same twounderlying causes for these pauses over and over.

    Often, men don't have good command of "material" or routines (specific things or stories to tell).I am consistently amazed and dismayed by how many guys want "more material" but don't learnthe fifteen or so highly-successful attraction routines I teach at every workshop. Many men seemto think that they need 300-odd polished routines to go from opening to the beginning of asexual relationship and that these have to be learned all at once. A better way of learning

    material is to focus on one routine at a time and use it in every approach. Then add another one.That may sound like a long process, but if you are approaching 12 groups in a night, that'senough to get a new piece of material polished every time you go out. The best source ofroutines out there is theLove Systems Routines Manual, but you can also check out TheAttraction Forumsand my interview withThe Don on using and creating routines.

    Some guys have the even greater self-imposed challenge that they think that they "don't useroutines." This is just silly. Everyone uses routines. Like I said above, a routine is simply a pieceof material that is polished for the occasion and can be used repeatedly. Your uncle Marcel hasprobably never heard of Love Systems, but when he tells the same story at every family reunionabout his ice fishing trip in Manitoba, he is delivering a routine. You already have certain stories

    or things to say that you've rolled out more than once in a conversation. Guess what? You'reusing routines.

    My point is that if you're going to use routines anyway, you may as well use good ones. And youmay as well use routines consciously. Not preparing routines will put you at a majordisadvantage, especially as you're developing your game. When you're using a routine, you don'thave to worry about what to say. You can focus on the much more important stuff, such as bodylanguage, tonality, touching, and movement. When you get these elements down, then you can

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    lay off the routines a little bit, especially if you learn to think on your feet. This is just basic

    tried-and-tested info on how to develop your game, and why we have so much confidence in ourteaching. We have a system, and it works. We know how to "get good" at dating science,because we've helped so many men through the process... including ourselves. Pretty muchevery one of our instructors is a former student.

    By the way, routines are not about "tricking" or "lying to women." No one is telling you torepeat, word-for-word, the comic book routine or my stranded-in-Paris story. You can if youwant for practice, but many routines are not about personal experiences (e.g., interestingobservations or third-person stories). In any case, from using the masters' routines, you can learnwhat they key elements are and how to make routines that do reflect your own life and

    experiences. This is something we cover in a lot more depth in the Routines Manual.

    Not only do routines save you from having to worry about what to say next (and the threat of anawkward pause if you can't think of anything), but they also narrow the field of likely responses.I've used some routines hundreds if not a thousand or two times and in most cases, there are onlya couple of likely responses that a woman or her group will give. Then you can practice dealingwith these specific responses. You'll eventually find a routine that best advances the interactionbased on her specific response. This is the beginning of a "routine stack" where instead ofhaving just one routine, you have a couple in a row, in the right order, with contingencies basedon her responses.

    If you are against routines or don't have routines at the beginning of your journey and you don'thave vastly above-average social skills, you are shooting yourself in the foot with a bazooka.

    Now, let's say that you are using routines, but you still end up with awkward pauses. This iswhere multiple thread theory can help.

    Multiple threading was introduced to the dating science community by an Australian man whouses the pseudonym Toecutter, who in turn modeled it from the comedian Billy Connelly.

    The basic idea of multiple threading is to pause your material at some arbitrary middle point andstart another conversational thread (i.e., a new topic of conversation). If you think about the wayyou talk to your friends, you naturally do this. You don't generally have a conversation about theweather and if another subject comes up ignore it because you're still talking weather. Insteadtangents pop up and some "stick" while others don't.

    http://www.lovesystems.com/routineshttp://www.lovesystems.com/routines
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    Not every routine or piece of material will have its desired impact (anyone who says otherwise is

    deluding himself; there are millions of factors that impact the success of a given piece ofmaterial at a given time, many of which are beyond your control). However, if you are runningmultiple threads, enough of the material will have a strong impact.

    Moreover, the effective use of multiple threads will give the woman and her group a sense offriendly familiarity as well as a feeling that "we have a lot to talk about."

    Now that we have an understanding of what multiple threads are, we can start to talk about howto use them:

    Set up multiple threads by pausing and starting a new tangent. The way to do this wouldbe simply to use a transition to move from one subject to another.

    Here's a quick review of the five basic ways to Transition from Magic Bullets:

    1. Content transition. The group says something that allows you to change thesubject. For example, the girl says that she was a gymnast as you are telling astory, you can transition by talking about gymnastics.

    2. Observational transitions. You simply make an observation then discuss it.

    3. Mini cold reads. You simply call her a brat, powderpuff girl, Nancy Drew, etc.out of nowhere and start role-playing.

    4. Phrasal. You simply say something along the lines of "It's just like when" or"That reminds me of" and change the subject.

    5. No transition. You simply start a new story out of the blue.

    Hooks. Hooks are simply unanswered questions or unfinished thoughts. They are alsocalled open loops. Here's where you say something like "I was on stage and..." whichwill provoke the question of what you were doing on stage. By responding withsomething like "I'll get there in a second," you've set up another conversational threadthat you can come back to. We also call this process embedding and it's a crucial part ofstorytelling in general.

    Foreshadowing. By saying something like "I have to tell you guys about the time I hid ina storm drain as the war passed by ahead" you are foreshadowing a story to tell when youare finished with what you are saying now.

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    Background information. By pausing a story to say something like "the reason it was a

    storm drain is important because I ended up finding some buried treasure and..." youallow yourself to add info on what happened before the present in the story.

    Character info. "I was with my friend Ernie drinking and smoking the hookah, and thething about Ernie is he's a kleptomaniac. This one time he got caught at Saddle Ranch;what happened was..." This allows me to start a new story to explain who the charactersare in my current story.

    That's enough to get you guys started. One of the major reasons why the pros are good is thatthey use multiple threading to avoid awkward pauses which lead to trying too hard to keep theconversation going and losing value.

    Ideally you want to aim for having 3-5 open conversational threads in every interaction. Thatway if for some reason either of you have to leave abruptly, you can get a phone number bysaying "we still have a LOT to talk about..." And then youre into phone game!

    Savoy

    http://www.lovesystems.com/newsletters/09-07-sinn-on-multiple-threads

    http://www.lovesystems.com/newsletters/09-07-sinn-on-multiple-threadshttp://www.lovesystems.com/newsletters/09-07-sinn-on-multiple-threads