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7/29/2019 TX Citizen 9.12.13
1/16
VOLUME T
WO
I S S U E 3 7
09.12 .13
VOLUME
TWO
I S S U E 3 7
09.12 .13
"P
eoplewhotakemorethantheirshareusuallyfeelaninflated
senseofentitlement."
Jean
nePhillips
$1
,649,
932.
32
P LUS : 7 DAY NEW BRAUNFE LS/SAN MARCOS L IVE MUS IC GU IDE
P LUS : 7 DAY NEW BRAUNFE LS/SAN MARCOS L IVE MUS IC GU IDE
The Island of Misplaced Property Rights | Scooter Store Moving Sale | Courtroom Hijinks
The Hungry Gypsy,
The Hair Studio,Miss TX Citizen and aPair of Giant Scissors!
Page 14
The Hungry Gypsy,
The Hair Studio,Miss TX Citizen and aPair of Giant Scissors!
Page 14
BUY - SELL - RENT
When it's time to move, call Kris rst!Kris Bolstad 830.660.8879 kris@propertynb.com
7/29/2019 TX Citizen 9.12.13
2/16
TXCITIZEN
1111
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lnutAvenue
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or$2.5
0each.
ST
AFF/
CONTACT
Publisher/Editor-in-ChieMikeReyno
lds
DirectoroDistributionChaseCochran
ArtDirectorKaylaWa
llace
Ed
itorial:news@txcitizen.com
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PHOTOC
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ITS
Cover,Interview,
Around&About:
ChaseCochran
2 AD SALES 830.483.9563
table of contents1st Word
Yeah, if yo u co ul d go ahe adand show us some paperwork
on that, thatd be great. 3
Advice fromUncle Esel
Got a prob lem? You wil l .
12
Sound Out Of TownBecause Austin and San Antoniooccasionally have live music too.
DiversionsKaraoke, trivia, pool tourneys,and the like.
Ask a MexicanGustavo offends intwo languages.
The County'sMost WantedLook Mommy!
Daddy's in the paper!
7Due ProcessOur shiny new writer continuesto run down the Comal CountyScientology case.
14 Around & AboutDouble ribbon cutting revelry!13Beer vs BeerBootlegger meets Moose.
8Citizen SoundcheckThe ONLY guide of its kind forthe NB/SM Metroplex!
6LineCrushers! Week On e Results!
10
The TX CitizenInterviewGary Rogers and his big,wo ode n ham mer.
5
11
Last WordDont be a mark. 15
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WORD
7/29/2019 TX Citizen 9.12.13
3/16
WORDSTMIKE
REYNOLDS
WITH
TXCITIZEN.COM 3
Correction: Last week, we incorrectly
stated that Edwards Aquier
Recovery Implementation Planlobbyist and ormer New
Braunels Watershed Manager
Nathan Pence is now employed
by the San Antonio Water System.
Pence is actually employed by the
Edwards Aquier Authority (which, in our
opinion, is even worse). On one occasion
we also incorrectly identifed the San Antonio
Water System as the San Antonio Water District,
o which there is none.
We did not, however, caption a photo
o Tiger Woods with the word Sandusky in
uly o 2012. That was the Houston-owned
Herald-Zeitung.
We apologize or any conusion we may
have caused.
Keep Out, YallIt is true that, when an entitlement begins to be
enjoyed by people, they like to keep it.
Former US Senator Jon Kyl
Last week we brought you our rst piece
on the private island located at the
headwaters o the Comal River. The article
was prompted by multiple reports o people
being berated out o the State-owned
waterway or not belonging there. We
didnt touch on the topic o The Island itsel,
just the act that the general public isntallowed in the water. This week were going
to talk about the land in question.
As we mentioned last week, at
some point in the past, a group
o residents in the Landa ParkEstates neighborhood got
legislation passed orming
something called Comal
County Water Recreation District
#1, which is ostensibly a special
taxing district, but, in reality, is a hammer
o conusion designed to keep the at-large
public rom using public resources, i.e. the
Comal headwaters and The Island.
Judy Young o the New Braunels
Convention and Visitors Bureau posted this,
the standard explanation, to the Moms o
New Braunels Facebook page last week:
The Landa Park Estates Island is not and
has not been unded by the City. It is State
Water District number 1 and is a taxing
district. The residents within its boundariespay taxes to maintain the island. (Note: It
is not State Water District number 1. Its
Comal County Water Recreation District #1.
Theres a dierence.)
Gosh, that seems almost reasonable.
These olks pay extra taxes! The Island and the
waters around it are highly desirable. Those
taxes must be through the roo! We pulled the
County tax rolls to see exactly how much tax
burden those homeowners are bearing.
Now we couldnt very well look up all
300 or so properties in the neighborhood, so
we went with the 19 houses that actually ace
the water the ultra-prime locations, as it
were and it turns out, per County records,
that they are indeed part o the taxing district.
We then added up what all 19 property
owners have collectively paid to the District,
through the County, over the last decade, which
turned out to be zero, because, according to
the Assessors oce, Comal County doesnt
collect the tax on Comal County Water
Recreation District #1. The State might, so
thats where were looking now. Well let you
know what turns up.
Continued on next page.
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Little slice o Heaven is what this is.
An wa we wrote down the address
FRIday
7/29/2019 TX Citizen 9.12.13
4/16
4 AD SALES 830.483.9563
Continued rom previous page.
Surprise!
The signage all around The Island makes it clearthat The Island and all the water around itare
private property but, as youve seen rom our
interview o psychic City Attorney, Madame Val
Acevado, and in our prole o Scooter Store
ounder Doug Harrison, words used in our air
city very oten take on a meaning that is the
exact opposite o what they have meant to out-
o-town English speakers or centuries.
In the case o Landa Park Estates, The
Islands enorcers have conused the wordprivate with not private at all. You see,
when something is private, it belongs to
somebody, and that somebody can prove it.
For instance, i you owned some land or a
house or a rendering plant, you could prove it
at the County Clerks oce.
Youd just walk right in to the oce, tell them
your address, and theyd show you the deed with
your name on it. (Or maybe your banks name
on it, i you borrowed some cash to buy theproperty.) We thought that seeing whose name
was on the deed to The Island might shed some
light on the situation. Ater all, Comal County
Water Recreation District #1 claims ownership.
The deed should be in their name.
So, step one was to have The Islands
address in hand beore we went to the Clerks
oce. You might think this story comes to a
dead end right here. We sure did. It does not.
On the original 1933 plat map, all the lotsin the neighborhood are laid out. The Island is
on the map, but does not have a lot number.
All o the streets end at the waters edge.
In 2012, The Island is stillwithout a lot
number, but, as i by magic, has an address
o 1170 Booneville Ave. Weve never heard
o someplace having an address without a lot
number, but were a sheltered bunch. Were
mos de not as inormed or sophisticated as
Judy Young, et al. Maybe she can tell us whenit was annexed into the sub-division, sans lot
number. Maybe not.
Anyway, we wrote down the addressand walked over to the County Clerks oce
and looked up the deed o which there was
NONE. No deed ound at the place where
deeds are kept. Now, beore you go thinking
that we just didnt look hard enough, let me
say right out that we had help rom County
sta and they couldnt nd it either.
So what were let with is private property
that apparently extends all the way across a
State waterway, without a deed. Just to be sure
about this, we put in an ocial inormation
request with the County. It could be another
week or two beore we hear back. Well let
you know the result o that request, either way.
Its unny, i the Islands enorcers hadnt
chased people out o the river, we wouldnt
have even looked at the issue. Its a toss up
as to whos less popular in Landa Park Estates
right now the sta o the TX Citizen, or the
enorcers that git-wrapped the story or us.
Fact: The disposable container ban does
not apply to the waters around The Island.
Ok, now we know its us or sure.
Enjoy that Tax IncreaseLast Monday, City Council voted 5-0 to adopt
the Citys new budget and our new 6.6% tax
increase. This increase is on top o the $86 million
in new bonds voted in by a reckless electorate inMay, that came with an average tax hit o 8.8
cents per $100 valuation, and the Certicates o
Obligation the Council approved in July, which
raised the rate another 3.5%. Hooray.
(TX Citizen landlady and) District Twos
Aja Edwards-Patino and District Sixs Stephen
Digges were not present or Mondays vote. Our
row is procedural we think i a tattoo shop on a
state highway (that at most, would directly aect
three homeowners) requires a supermajority osix votes or approval, so should the budget and
anything else, like Certicates o Obligation,
which aect every last one o us (except people
over 65 who have their taxes capped).
Council Highlight ReelBar none, the best moment o the night came
when current Mayor Gale Pospisil stopped the
meeting to tell Mayoral hopeul, and eighth
wonder o the world, Baron Casteel to Gooutside or just stop talking. Thank you
That was awesome.
\m/
Mike Reynolds
Publisher/Editor-in-Chie
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TXCITIZEN.COM 5
The LiquidatorThis Saturday, in preparation or the move to
their new, smaller corporate headquarters,
The Scooter Store is selling much o their ofce
equipment and urniture with the help o Uber-
Auctioneer Gary Rogers. We sat down with
Gary as he readied his team or the sale,
and talked about his job, the event, and i
scratching your head will inadvertently commit
you to buying a truckload o water coolers.
TX Citizen: Weve never met an auctioneer
beore. Whats this gig like?
Gary Rogers: Its the craziest, most un
job anybody could ever have. Every minute
o every day is new and exciting. From going
out onto a ranch or an estate, or a house inor out o town. Im called by people who are
in distress or trouble. The auctioneer is oten
called at times o problems in a amily or a
corporation. We get to have a lot o un in
doing it, and help people at the same time.
I know that sounds kind o unny, but you
get to go out to a arm, ranch, outbuilding, go
through it, see what things there are to sell, see
what you can nd that the amily didnt know
was worth money and sell it or them. Thatsor a residential client.
We do the same thing in like manner or
our commercial clients. Like i a actory or a
business owner has excess inventory that they
want to turn into cash, we bring buyer and
seller together. Thats what Im doing or the
Scooter Store auction.
We also run the Gruene Flea, which
is an 18,000 square oot antique mall
right here in New Braunels. We are in theliquidation business. Thats what we do on a
day-to-day basis.
TXC: Lets get into this Scooter Store
sale, specically.
Gary: Well, its a lot o things or sale.
Ironically, the Scooter Store has no scooters or
sale! Thats the most interesting thing. Everybody
hears Scooter Store and thinks they can come
and buy their mom or grandmother a scooter.The Scooter Store is still in business, still doing
business, and still selling scooters to senior
citizens and people with impaired mobility.
However, at the auction, we are actually selling
oce equipment, computers, printers, copiers,
monitors, a ull stainless steel kitchen, an IT
hub, servers, all the things you need to run a
corporate oce the size o the Scooter Store.
TXC: How do you set the opening bid?
Gary: I usually do my research and know
what an item sells or new. We know that the
rule o thumb is that a good, serviceable item
is worth hal o what it cost new, at least.
Now thats a general rule o thumb. For
instance, a piece o used chewing gum is not
worth hal o what it was when you paid or
it! It doesnt always apply! And things closer
to the body, like clothes, socks, sot goods,
carpets, shoes, it doesnt work. But or hardgoods that have a long, serviceable lie, it
generally does. What I try to do is to start at
about 25% o its value, then we bid it on the
ree and open American enterprise concept,
and let the market set the value.
I can never sell it or too much or the
person Im selling it or, and I can never sell
it or too little to the person buying it! So I
walk a tightrope. But the neat thing about the
auctioneers trade and business is the marketends up setting the price.
When the dealers in that used commodity
business quit bidding, and the little church
group wants used stacking chairs, and they
buy it or $1 over the guy who buys to resale,
then the market has set those prices. The
auctioneer, believe it or not, does not set the
prices. Just like pork bellies, or a bushel o
wheat, or a barrel o oil - the market sets thoseprices. And the market sets the nal prices or
things that sell at auction, whether high or low.
TXC: How much stu are we looking at here?
Gary: There are a lot o items, and they
will be sold in lots. I a person is looking to
buy just one cubicle, then they need to talk to
me privately on the side. I dont want to sell
just one cubicle at the Scooter Store. This is
or somebody who is going to buy them in
lots. There were, I think, 1600 employees at
one point, so weve got between 1000 and
1600 cubicles. That means every cubicle
had an oce chair, so weve 1000 to 1600
o them. Weve got 1000 to 1600 monitors,
keyboards, mice. Weve got all o the stu
youd have at an oce.
We also have the support. Theres a ull
photo studio. Theres a great video camera.
There is a ull, stainless steel restaurant. There areconerence rooms, executive oces, executive
urniture. There are olding tables and stacking
chairs. Theres patio urniture, a storage pod.
Theres a lot o stu. Theres a whole git room
o Scooter Store memorabilia. Theres a lot o
single item stu that is going to sell reasonably.
But we are hoping to get the bigger, corporate
buyers or the cubicles and oce chairs and the
stu we have so many multiples o.
TXC: What i we just want one thing? Onereally cool thing. Weve got our eye on one o
those toasters. And a gun rack.
Gary: All the things are palletized. Like
the computers, I think its 75 towers to a pallet.
But theres one thats not 75, so that person
should bid on that one. Most people are not
going to want more than one. But the thing
they can also do is get the business card o
the person who buys all o the items and makethem a deal on the side. Most o the time,
theyre over-buying and would be happy to
deray some o their expenses by selling a
much smaller quantity to somebody.
Ive been at sales where Ive sold the bulk,
then somebody buys one or two o the item
rom them. Its the American ree enterprise
system, but youve got to think outside the box
just a little bit.
TXC: How long do you expect the auction
to last?
Gary: It should be about a our-hour auction.
TXC: I Im there and I scratch my head,
have I just inadvertently bid?
Gary: Thats an old joke about i you
scratch your nose or your ear, or turn to your
wie and say something, that thats a bid. No.
I auction very, very clearly. Youll know exactly
where youre at. Youll know exactly what
youre bidding on. You will have to hold your
bidder card up, and Ill know in no uncertain
terms that youre bidding.
That was the I Love Lucy humorous thing
that they say about auctions. A good auctioneer
wants to know that you are certainly bidding. I
need you to know when youre bidding.
The Scooter Store ofce equipment and urniture auctionis scheduled or this Friday, September 13, at noon. I
youd like to bid, you can preview the items on Thursdayrom 9am to 5pm and on Friday rom 9am to 12pm. Formore inormation, logon to nbauctionco.com.
The TX Citizen Interview:
Gary Rogers, Auctioneer
7/29/2019 TX Citizen 9.12.13
6/166 AD SALES 830.483.9563
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A Comal County residents lawsuit againstvarious entities o the Church o Scientology
was ratcheted up last week when Mark MartyRathbun added an adavit to his wies case.Monique Rathbun led suit and
a temporary restraining order againstScientology leader David Miscavige, theReligious Technology Center and the Churcho Scientology International (CSI) or what shesays is harassment, orchestrated by the churchagainst she and her husband.
Also named in the suit are Monty Drake,a private investigator based in Texas, and
Steven Gregory Sloat, a ormer U.S. Marshal.Two more names were added to ling: DavidLubow (aka David J. Labow) and Ed Bryan.The our men are accused o carrying outharassment against Monique Rathbun.
Marty Rathbun served 27 years in theChurch and was second in command underMiscavige. Rathbun, who was Inspector Generalo the Religious Technology Center (RTC), let thechurch in 2004 and has been publicly critical o
Miscavige, accusing the Church leader o physicaland mental abuse. Monique Rathbun has neverbeen a member o the Church o Scientology norspoken publicly about the organization.
Rathbuns adavit is in response toSpecial Appearance lings by Miscavige,the RTC and its president, Warren McShane,which argue that Texas courts do not haveproper jurisdiction. Along with the SpecialAppearance, Miscavige and McShane led
Declarations stating that, among other claims,they have never had any business in Texas,have never heard o codeendants Drake andSloat, nor have ever contracted anyone in thestate to do work or them or the RTC.
A hearing or a temporary injunction isscheduled or Thursday and Friday. A decisionon the Special Appearance is expectedThursday. Judge Dib Waldrip will be presiding.
In his adavit, Marty Rathbun deniesMiscaviges claims about Drake and Texas.Rathbun states that Miscavige, who is RTCchairman, has known o Drakes work or theChurch since the 1990s when he becameScientologys primary private investigatoror Texas matters.
One instance o Miscaviges relationshipto Drake, according to Rathbun, was inthe case o Lisa McPherson, a ormer Texanwho died in 1995 while under care o theChurch in Florida. McPhersons amily sued
the Church or wrongul death. The case wassettled or an undisclosed amount in 2004.Criminal charges were dropped when, in
2000, the medical examiner changed thecause o death rom undetermined to accident.
The McPherson incident was a notoriouspublic relations nightmare or the Church.Rathbun states that his ormer boss orderedhim on several occasions between 1996 and2004 to have Mr. Drake obtain both specicand general inormation on the amily o LisaMcPherson. Rathbun goes on to say in theadavit that he personally handed each oMr. Drakes reports to Mr. Miscavige.
He then asserts that Miscavige wantedto get the McPherson case moved to Texas
because the Church leader thought PedilloCounty in Florida, where McPherson died, washostile. Miscavige repeatedly stressed to methat no Texas suit could be led unless I oundTexas legal counsel so connected to the localjudiciary as to assure victory to (the) Church.
The adavit continues to describe whatRathbun says were the Church leaders attemptsto stop the suit, even sending someone toMcPhersons uneral in an attempt to handle
McPhersons mother to get her not to investigatethe circumstances o her daughters death,even i that meant paying her. Rathbun quotesMiscavige as saying it was worth it to lose acouple hundred grand or this to go away.
Monique Rathbuns amended petition,led by her attorney Ray Jerey, countersMcShanes claims to having never contractedwork in Texas on behal o RTC. The petitionquotes a 2010 report led by the sheri o
Caliornias Riverside County regarding acase o a Church deector. The report said thatMr. McShane told me RTC had previouslycontracted with a private security rm in theState o Texas to monitor Mr. Rathbun.
Calls and emails seeking comment romattorneys or Miscavige, RTC and CSI were notreturned by Monday.
Also as o Monday, none o the otherour deendants have representation, norhave they been served. Jerey said that heintends to ask the court or permission toserve the men at their homes.
Update: In response to Marty Rathbunsafdavit, CSI fled a motion to have his wies
attorney, Ray Jerey, removed rom the case.
CSI is claiming that comments by Marty
Rathbun concerning the Churchs search or
a Texas attorney in the McPherson case was
secret inormation and a violation o attorney-
client privilege. Neither Rathbun nor Miscavige
are attorneys.
Nick Rogers covers courts and crime or the TX Citizen.
Due ProcessWITH NICK ROGERS
Ex-Scientology Ofcial Files Afdavit in Wies Suit
7/29/2019 TX Citizen 9.12.13
8/168 AD SALES 830.483.9563
Thu 9.12Black Whale Pub
TBA9pm
Dirtys Bar & QSteven Roloff8pm
Oma Gruenes Secret GartenJam Night6pm
Phoenix SaloonAdam Johnson5pm
Rileys TavernDevin Jake9pm
AJs Ale HouseRock & Roll Sing Along Piano Bar Show9pm
Billys Ice HouseTessy Lou & the Shotgun Stars8pm
Cheatham Street WarehouseDirty River Boysw/ Charlie Stout9pm
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6pmGruene Hall
Chris Ruest Band6pm
The Pour HausTony Taylor7pm
River Road Ice HouseWhiskey Rodeo7pm
Tavern in the GrueneBill Carter8pm
Triple CrownNate Guthrie6pmMustache Party!Funkotron, Loose Leaf10pm
Uptown Piano BarAshley Stone
8pm
Fri 9.13
Dirtys Bar & QGerald Burns
8pm
The Happy CowTBA
8pm
Oma Gruenes Secret GartenPhilip Stevens Band
6pm
Phoenix SaloonBroseph
5pm
Ali Holder
w/ The Kinfolk
9pm
Rileys TavernClark Patterson & Mando Saenz
9pm
AJs Ale HouseRock & Roll Sing Along Piano Bar Show
9pm
Billys Ice House3 Man Front
8pm
Bubbas Big DeckBlooz Burnerz
6pm
Cheatham Street WarehouseJohn Slaughter
9pm
Geronimo VFW 8456Country Dance
Wyatt Arp & the Deep Water Band
7:30pm
Gruene HallLisa Marie Presleyw/ The Peterson Brothers
8pm, $30-$130
The Pour HausAdam Johnson Band
9pmRiver Road Ice HouseThe Hillbilly Jug Band7pm
Tavern in the GrueneTanner Louis & the Aviators8pm
Triple CrownRabb Rodriguez6pm
Quiet Company, Lochness Mobsters
10pm
Uptown Piano BarBarry Adams
8pm
Vineyard at GrueneAvalon
7pm
Vino en VerdeTwo Rivers Trio
8pm
Sat 9.14
Black Whale PubTBA
9pm
Dirtys Bar & QBlooz Burnerz
8pm
The Happy CowJordan Minor & Slim Bawb
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Vagabonds del Sol1pm
The Texas Saints
6pm
Phoenix SaloonLucas Taylor & Old Soul
9pm
Rileys TavernRileys 80th Anniversary Party
1pm
AJs Ale HouseRock & Roll Sing Along Piano Bar Show
9pm
Billys Ice HouseRyan McBride & the Groomsmen
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Cheatham Street Warehouse
Hogg Mauliesw/ Wes Nickson
9pm
Gruene HallBill Chambers & Friends1pmHayes Carllw/ Mike & the Moonpies9pm, $20
The Pour HausBryan Boyce, Paul Rogers,Hunter McKithan, T-Ray Porche9pm
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Triple CrownBuzz n Bangs, Neon Cobra,The Lion & the Giraffe10pm
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Phoenix SaloonJordan Minor2pmWestgate Revival7pm
Cheatham Street WarehouseRandy Rogersw/ Surprise Guest
9pm
Gruene HallRuby Jane12:30pmGreg Trooper5pm
The Pour HausAaron Stephens5pm
River Road Ice HouseBig Benefit8pm
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7/29/2019 TX Citizen 9.12.13
9/16TXCITIZEN.COM 9
Tavern in the GrueneWhiskey Rodeo8pm
Mon 9.16
Rileys TavernSongwriter Showcase
w/ John Whipple
Billys Ice HouseJoe Teichman
8pm
Cheatham Street WarehouseGrant Ewing & Colin Colby
9pm
Gruene HallTish Hinojosa & Marvin Dykhuis
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River Road Ice HouseEmpty Handed Vagabonds
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Tavern in the GrueneCourt Nance & Friends
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Triple CrownRipe Honey
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Tues 9.17
Rileys TavernSteven Roloff
9pm
Watering Hole SaloonTBA
8:30pm
Cheatham Street WarehouseMidnight River Choir
w/ Russell Bisbey
9pm
Gruene HallTom Gillam
w/ Randy Weeks & Elizabeth Lee
6pm
The Pour HausOpen Mic w/ Jon Magill
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Tavern in the GrueneRoots & Branches of Americana7pm
The Blooms
9:30pm
Triple CrownBruce Curtis
6pm
Goodwill Souljahs, Robin Dharampal
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Wed 9.18Bualo Wings & Rings
Steven Roloff & Friends
7:30pm
Phoenix SaloonHillbilly Jug Band
8pm
Rileys Tavern
Michael Fletcher9pm
Watering Hole SaloonAllan Goodman
8:30pm
Billys Ice HouseAaron Stephens
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Cheatham Street WarehouseKent Finlays Songwriters Circle9pm
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Sat 9.14
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Joe E ly Band Reunion
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The Inidels
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10pm, $10
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w/ The Millipede, Awesome Death,
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ADVICE FROM
UNCLE ESEL
7/29/2019 TX Citizen 9.12.13
11/16TXCITIZEN.COM 11
Uncle Esel,
With all the problems on cruise
ships, would you recommend to a
reader to take a cruise? I have wanted
to cruise to Mexico or years, but Im
scared o a re or some bad sickness. Is
it worth the risk?
Tank You,
Colleen
Dear Colleen,
Certainly it cant be as bad as when
the Esels came over in the mid 1800s rom
Germany. There have been some incidents
that got a lot o media attention in the last year
or two, but keep in mind that there are manymore cruises that go o without much problem
each year. Best bet is to use a reputable
travel agent and buy insurance or the trip in
case something goes wrong. By the way,
Uncle Esel does not get seasick and makes a
wonderul travel companion.
Love, K
Dear Uncle Esel,
Heyyyyyy, the Cowboys won. Smells
like this is our year, doesnt it?
Danny
Sorry Danny Boy,
Gotta love the way Cowboy ans light
up with a lead or a win. Its like a death row
prisoner cheering a power outage. Uncle
Esel isnt really a big ootball an, but I was
once, in my younger days, and back thenI was a an o the Oilers. Truthully, I was
more a Derrick Dolls an with those little skirts
and red hair.
Another reason I preerred the team to the
east is that Houston people are ar less stuck
up and uptight than the typical Dallas person.
Did I mention the Derrick Dolls? Unortunately,
Mrs. Esel would change the channel i she
caught me eyeing those cheerleaders.
In the long run, its always good to see
a Texas team do well against those outsiders.
Its those Packer ans who give all Yankees a
bad name.
Love, K
Mr. Esel,
Ater reading last weeks article
by Mr. reynolds about the Island I
wondered i the area was also inhabitedby those endangered species that weve
been hearing about or the last ew
years? I so, why are they allowed to
take cans and stuf in there?
Tanks,
Nancy
Dear Nancy,
Actually, the area is very sensitive
and inhabited in particular by the Karst
Invertebrates that were a big part o the
reason the government was sued by the Sierra
Club. It is also Fountain Darter habitat. Why
the area is not subject to the same restrictions
as the rest o the Comal River (yes, this area
is technically the Comal River) is part o what
was described last week. The people in
power who protect the little oasis didnt wantanyone to mess with their prize.
Former City employee Nathan Pence
had broad discretion to include or exclude
areas rom being part o the habitat areas,
and this one was obviously excluded even
though the area is perhaps more critical
than areas down river in the articially
created channel.
It is still possible that with the reducedwater fows that this area may one day
be identied as so critical that water
recreation may be halted. There have been
challenges to previous protections in Bexar
and Comal counties that resulted in more
sensitive areas being added relating to
the Karst Invertebrates and the threat rom
environmental groups remains high. Esel
cant help but see the irony that the so-called
intent o the water district was designed
or ecological reasons to begin with and
because that isnt happening, the threat o
losing recreation is very real.
Love, K
Uncle Esel,
What scares you more than
anything?
JM
Dear JM,
Two words. Mayor Krueger.
Love, K
Uncle K. Esel is a lietime resident o our air city, and iswell known or his sage advice on a wide range o topics.I you fnd yoursel perplexed with no one to turn to,send your question to Uncle Esel at: askesel@TXCITIZEN.COM. Be sure to write Question or Uncle Esel in thesubject line o your email.
UNCLE ESEL
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ASK A MEXICAN!!
MOSTCOMAL COUNTY S
7/29/2019 TX Citizen 9.12.13
12/1612 AD SALES 830.483.9563
By Gustavo Arellano
Dear Mexican: I have a Mexican
riend at work, and we happened to get
in a discussion that started of ne
but I believe that I ofended her as the
discussion progressed. My intention, o
course, was not to do such.We were talking about an upcoming
Cinco de Mayo celebration, and I asked
i she knew the true meaning behind
Cinco de Mayo. O course I do, she
said. It was a amous battle we won
we, meaning Mexico. hats great,
I replied, because a lot o people
have the wrong idea they think its
when Mexico got its indepe ndenc e.
She then said, Yeah only you gringos
think that.
She implied that she should know
because she is Mexican-American. I
said that shes really an American that
happens to have Mexican heritage. I
dont call mysel a European-American,
I told her. I was born here, just like
she was! I said i that was the case, she
should call hersel a Roman-Moorish-
Spanish-Mexican-American.
She turned and showing signs o
being upset, and said we are really in
Mexico. I was at rst conused, then I
realized that she was suggesting that
exas, Arizona, Caliornia, and New
Mexico was originally Mexicos land. Isaid, Actually, were in Nevada which
I dont think was part o that region. I
also stated that it was originally Indian
land and that the Mexicans took the land
rom the Native Americans. We, being
Americans took it rom the Mexicans.
Seeing that she was upset, I apologized
or upsetting her. Tose were not my
intentions. Whats your opinion?
H.R. Harridan
Dear Gabacha: Nevada not a ormer
part o Mexico? Where do you think the name
came romThe Anglo-Saxon Chronicle? That
said, you were in the right. She shouldnt have
called you a gringo at workshe should know
better that we save that or when youre outo sight, or mutter it under our breath when
youre one cubicle over.
She also shouldnt be telling you that this
land is Mexicoalthough it is, its a classied
secret not ready or revelation until Nevada
is majority-Mexican like Southern Caliornia.
Finally, her whole weepy-moany act is beneath
a true Mexicanashe shouldve dismantled
your weak-ass arguments with the acts or
better yeta well-placed chinga tu madre.
Dear Mexican: Im a very white
man who lives in a small town about
13 miles rom the Mexico border. In
this small town there is a cofee shop,
and an attractive Mexican lady started
working there.
She does not speak English. I have
a Spanish/English dictionary, and I
have been writing her notes when I go
into the cofee shop. She writes back in
Spanish, short little notes. She says hello
to me every time I go in there; I have
been practicing my Spanish hello.
Tat is about as ar as we have gotten.
Her children speak English, but shedoes not. I cannot see spending my lie
talking to her through her children.
I am not sure what to do next. Can
you help me with the next step? I would
enjoy spending more time with her...
Still On Spanish
Dear SOS: Wow, a Marty Robbins
song come to lie! While your average
Chicana scholar would rightully rip you
apart or your paternalistic, colonialist,
macho, heteronormative attitude, Ill be a
bit more sympathetic: Youre going WAY
ahead o yoursel.
Already talking about seeing a lietime
with this woman? Get to a situation where you
can slip o her chonis rst, son! And to get tothat step, learn some habla rst. And to get
to that step, get thee to a Spanish-language
class; since youre near la rontera, a soccer
league will suce.
Ask the Mexican at themexican@askamexican.net, be his an on Facebook,ollow him on Twitter @gustavoarellano
or ask him a video question at youtube.com/askamexicano!
ASK A MEXICAN!!
MOSTWANTED
$200 REWARD
ESPINOZA,
RAMON CAINE
Male 507 120 lbsDOB: 11/24/1993
CHARGE: Failure to
appear for burglary of
habitation
KRAHN,
SHAWNA SASSEFemale 50 160 lbsDOB: 09/11/1975
CHARGE: Violation ofconditions of probation
for possession of a
controlled substance
MARTINEZ,BENITO
Male 510 170 lbs
DOB: 01/10/1984
CHARGE: Motion to
revoke probation for
burglary of habitation
VANN, JOSEPH
DERRICKMale 509 220 lbsDOB: 09/24/1977CHARGE:Affidavit ofsurety to surrendermotion to revokeprobation for possessionof a controlled substance
WALLACE,
KIMBERLIE LOFTUSFemale 509 155 lbsDOB: 07/11/1975
CHARGE: Failure to
appear for possession
of a controlled
substance
The names listed have been released in accordance with the TexasPublic Information Act Code 552.001 st.seq.annotated Public Recordand Information disclosure statues.This is a true and accurateaccount as of Monday, September 9, 2013 at 9:30 am and may notbe current by the time it is read. Do not try to apprehend anyone. Foranonymous tips and rewards, please contact Crime Stoppers at:
24-Hour Phone number 830.620.3400; Mon-Fri 8am to 5pm830.620.3411. These are listings of criminal warrants with the SheriffsOffice and are not indicative of guilt or innocence. Officers are to verifythe status of each warrant prior to making an arrest. Any person isinnocent of wrongdoing unless proven guilty in a court of law.
FOR INFORMATION LEADING TO THE ARRESTOF COMAL COUNTYS MOST WANTED.Callers will remain anonymous.
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7/29/2019 TX Citizen 9.12.13
13/16TXCITIZEN.COM 13
MENUDOCOOKS
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Rivercity Range3674 Loop 337, NB TX 830.629.3500
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7/29/2019 TX Citizen 9.12.13
14/1614 TX CITIZEN14 AD SALES 830.483.9563AROUND&ABOUT
GRANDOPENIN
G!
Last Saturday, Miss TX Citizen(Brooke Heithoff) and about 60
other fans and friends of the
Hungry Gypsy and The Hair Studio
came out for a double ribbon
cutting at their new home at 1015
W. San Antonio St! The food, by
chef Mark Segovia, was delicious,
the door prizes provided by variouslocal businesses were fabulous, and
the free chair massages provided
by The Hair Studio were a major hit.
All of us here at the TX Citizen wish
them the best in their new location!
If youd like to schedule a free ribbon cutting to celebrate the grand opening
or re-opening of your business, send us an email at events@txcitizen.comand well make sure its a crazy success.
7/29/2019 TX Citizen 9.12.13
15/16TXCITIZEN.COM 15
JUST DO ITSometimes, the ideas I get derive rom a nearly
unathomable thought process. Normally I
lter things a bit, as I eel that this is the best
way to get polished work. I thought today I
would do things dierently. What you see
below is how I got rom teaching to parenting
to oreign policy and Syria, topics mostly
relatable only in my own mind.
Ive been told by a lot o teachers that
teaching is in many ways like parenting. And,
I have been told by a lot o parents that theirchildren are animals. This insight has done a
lot to color the way I teach and the advice I
oer to new teachers.
Establish dominance early. Here,
fipping over desks and chairs while hooting
loudly like a chimpanzee on the rst day o class
can be as, or even more, useul than urinating
on students legs as they come through the door.
Never show fear. Like animals,
students have a keen nose or ear and areeven more likely to press i they eel they
have an advantage.
Avoiddirecteyecontact.Eyecontact
can be a key to engaging with students, but
some o them will see it as a sign o aggression.
The idea here is to avoid a severe beat down
or an accusation o sexual harassment.
Dontbeafraidtoturntothewhip.
Discipline must be maintained at all times, and
it is ar less important to air or kind than itis to be consistent.
Beore you call the teachers union, in reality,
I have never oered this advice, but sometimes
what seems to be the worst possible action can
actually be brilliantly conceived in the eect it
has and lesson it teaches. I learned this not as
a teacher, though. Instead, I learned it rom a
simple interaction with a riend and his son.
As the riend and his son, who could
not have been more than seven at the time,
approached me, the ather asked o the son,
Is that a quarter on the ground?
The son, like any child o that age,
immediately looked to the ground or his
possible payday.
When he did, the ather briskly, but not
brutally, slapped his son in the back o the
head. Dont trust anyone, he said.
At rst I was shocked. Why would someonedo that? Then, slowly but surely, the brilliance o
my riends parenting strategy dawned on me.
It was conrmed or me a week later when
I saw the riend and his son again. This time
the son was being quite petulant. With a sighthat indicated his rustration, my riend began
to count while waiting or his son to comply.
Abruptly and precisely on the count o two,
my riend swatted the child orceully on the
buttocks. The child looked at him aghast. It was
clear the child had expected more time. Perhaps
it was his athers habit to count to ten (or at least
three) beore action was taken. Tears welled up
in the boys eyes and he ran o sniveling.
Again, Im not a parent, so tell the CPS
worker on the other end o the line to never
mind, and put down the phone. The point is
this. My riend was teaching his child valuable
lie lessons in perhaps the best way possible.
Sure, everyone teaches their children not to
take candy rom strangers (Halloween excepted),
but statistically speaking, strangers are relatively
sae. How many parents teach their children the
more practical lesson? Maybe you should bewary o Uncle Pete who oers horsey rides
at every amily reunion and seems to enjoy
them a bit too much. Assuming that this lesson
is reinorced periodically, your child might grow
up to realize that the only thing more oolish than
lending money to riends is lending money to
amily, without the generally obligatory nancial
drubbing. Just as important as teaching your
child to be sae in his interactions is to teach him
or her not to be a mark.The second event teaches an equally
valuable practical lesson. You dont always
get to three; dont push the envelope. I cant
tell you the number o kids that ail to grasp this
important truism today. Sometimes Mommy or
Daddy is having a bad day, and you should
learn to recognize these situations. You may
not be ostering the closeness with your
children youd love to have, but you may be
saving them rom an inevitable ass-whuppin
at the biker bar or a tazing by the police.
All o this might be said to be valuable
rom a oreign policy perspective as well.
President Obama is in just such a situation
with Syria right now (assuming Russias current
plan to calm things down doesnt work).
Having set a red line or the use o
chemical weapons, it appears that the Syrian
government has jumped both ooted over saidline with their tongue sticking out. What is the
leader o the ree world to do?
While most o us ponder what is legal,
what is best or America, what is best or the
Presidents credibility, or what the internationalcommunity will think, Obamas best move may
be a little old ashioned practical discipline
considering none o the above.
The correct response may just be one
that no one is considering. Be unpredictable
and perhaps a little vindictive. He could nuke
Damascus, or better yet, Iran. What about
destroying the countys entire oil producing
capability? It isnt enough to seriously disruptthe world market, but it would cripple what is
let o Syrias economy.
The administration has made a constant
case that this will be a small strike, a shot
across the bow i you will. Maybe the shot
across the bow should sink the entire ship this
time. (Oops! Our bad.) Heck, level the entirety
o the country currently held by Assad, civilian
and military targets alike. (It worked in Waco.
Why should we treat Syrians any dierentlythan we treat Texans?)
The reason Obama is in trouble here isnt
because he shot his mouth o without thinking,
its because Assad knows that Obama has no
will to back his strong rhetoric up. Obama
should prove him wrong. Part o the magic
o President Reagans oreign policy with the
USSR was that the Soviets suspected he might
be a little bit crazy, a cowboy who might startWorld War III on a whim. It almost certainly
wasnt true, but it kept them guessing.
Obama needs a little o this tough-
guy magic right now. The way to get it is
to act out o character. The world has seen
Obama tear himsel apart over this. He
appears weak. He appears to be looking
or some way to shit the inevitable blame
rom whatever decision he makes. Stop it all,
and respond with a totally incommensuratelevel o orce. Once thats done wait or the
ur to fy, and consider responding in similar
ashion when it does. I you cant get respect,
be willing to settle or a little ear. I or one
would appreciate it i we could get back to
a point where tin-pot dictators shuddered a
bit when the U.S. was mentioned.
You can read more rom Kelly Colby at yourfrstshrug.blogspot.com.
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