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Dealing with Complaints and
Difficult Customers
[Photo of Presenter]
C.W. Miller
President, CTC
www.customtrainingconcepts.com
The views expressed in presentations made at International Hearing Society (IHS) educational events are those of the speaker and not necessarily of IHS. Presentations at IHS events, or the presence of a speaker at an IHS event, does not constitute an endorsement of the speaker's views.
From the desk of
our Attorney
The Life cycle of a failed customer relationship
Why difficult customers do what they do
Who’s really got the monkey (the problem)
Emotional Hijacking
The Dynamic loop of a complaint
How to handle complaints for positive outcomes
Q&A
Agenda
Learning Objectives:
After this seminar, participants will be able to…
1. recognize and diminish the impact of emotional
hijacking.
2. apply a five step process to turn complaints into
opportunities.
3. explain why difficult people do what they do and
how they push our buttons.
4. avoid the number one most critical mistake in
handling complaints.
© Custom Training Concepts
Four Stages
A good job of presenting ourselves
On our best behavior Carefully watch how they react
to our efforts Try to make them feel special Adjust as necessary to
strengthen the relationship
Everything is wonderful. We celebrate the joy of
coming together. We’re so thankful to have
them. We don’t even notice those
minor difficulties. They’re all ours. (Forever?)
The parties are getting used to each other.
They begin to take each other for granted.
Failures to meet expectations are noticed.
It doesn’t feel special any more.
Unresolved conflicts cause mistrust and resentment.
Patience has been exhausted. They’re no longer willing to
tolerate problems. They begin to long for that
special feeling. They begin to look elsewhere
to regain the magic. Both parties are left
wondering what happened.
© Custom Training Concepts
Customer satisfaction is most often lost as the routine develops.
This is when apathy can easily set in for both parties.
Your ability to sustain lasting customer relationships depends on what you do during this part of the cycle.
© Custom Training Concepts
Consider a difficult situation you have encountered.
What do customers do that makes them
difficult.
Why do they do that?
They do it because it works
Behavior and actions are a choice
The answer – what’s in it for them
© Custom Training Concepts
The bigger question is…
“Why are they difficult for us?”
Separate the people from the behavior.
Decide who has the monkey.
© Custom Training Concepts
Pick a customer
What did they do? The behavior?
Why did it bother you? The impact?
© Custom Training Concepts
Would you accept this behavior from some people?
Why?
© Custom Training Concepts
Who’s Got the Monkey
• Separate person from the behavior
• Consider only the behavior
• Is it the person or our own perception
Are you the only one it bothers?
Do others bother you the same way?
Is the business unaffected?
Question Yourself
You may have the monkey!
Sometimes, people just seem to…
When the answers
are “yes”
© Custom Training Concepts
...push our buttons!
© Custom Training Concepts
Any event or action that causes a high level of emotion can be called an emotional trigger.
When an emotional trigger occurs, we choose our response.
© Custom Training Concepts
When our response seems to occur instantaneously without conscious thought it is
Emotional Hijacking
© Custom Training Concepts
Feeling Response Event or Action
Perceptions
And
Paradigms
Judgment
It can all happen in an instant!
Perceptions and paradigms reinforce each other!
© Custom Training Concepts
5 Minutes
50 Years
© Custom Training Concepts
Arbinger Institute
Hearts are at war
© Custom Training Concepts
Jonathan Haidt
Confirmation bias
Get along best with those like us
Most problems with the oppositional
© Custom Training Concepts
The key fact is that judgment is not always based on truth.
More often it is based on our view of reality according to our subconscious beliefs.
Unfortunately, past experience, coupled with established patterns can distort judgment causing feelings and responses that are problematic.
© Custom Training Concepts
Feeling
Concern
Expressed as
Complaint
Impacts our
Feelings
Choose a Response
Escalate
De- escalate
Feeling Concern
Expressed as
Complaint
Impacts our
Feelings
Choose a Response
© Custom Training Concepts
One of 3 Ways Destroyed
Sustained
Improved
© Custom Training Concepts
To a great extent, the nature of the exchange, and ultimately the direction the relationship takes, depends on our response.
© Custom Training Concepts
This goes for both external and internal customers.
When we get negative feedback; it doesn’t make us or our performance bad.
© Custom Training Concepts
You do not need to affirm their rightness, but you do need to affirm their importance and the importance of your relationship.
© Custom Training Concepts
What do they want?
To be acknowledged!
Don’t take it personally.
It’s not about you.
It’s really about them.
© Custom Training Concepts
© Custom Training Concepts
“…anything that people hear from us that sounds like an analysis or a criticism, or that implies wrongness on their part prevents us from connecting with them…”
These verbal miscues are what I call “pushes.’
© Custom Training Concepts
Be sure your head is in
the right place.
Look at complaints as opportunities.
1) Acknowledge
2) Apologize (without blame)
3) Shift (To Positive)
4) Distinguish ourselves (Why we are special)
5) Resolve (Negotiate Solutions)
5 Step Shift