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The art of Photo by Seth Anderson [link ] self-coaching Ed Batista CLASS 7: UNHAPPINESS

Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

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Page 1: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

The art of

Photo by Seth Anderson [link]

self-coachingEd BatistaCLASS 7: UNHAPPINESS

Page 2: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Class 7

Photo by Leo Reynolds [link]

Page 3: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Unhappiness

Photo by Leo Reynolds [link]

Page 4: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

What’s in theroom?

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Page 5: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Discuss with your partner

Photo by Jes [link]

Page 6: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

UnhappinessEveryone you meet

is fighting a battleyou know nothing about.

~ Wendy Mass

Page 7: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Photo by Theresa Thompson [link]

3 exercises 60 minsSmall groups 15 minsFor next time… 5 mins

Agenda

Page 8: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Not a deep dive

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Page 9: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Positive

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psychologyConnections with todayImportance of meaningEmotion managementMental models

Page 10: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Downsides

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Banish unhappiness?Peterson: Blame the victimAgency “I’m responsible”

& limits

Page 11: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

3 exercises

Photo by Daniel Oines [link]

Page 12: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

3 exercisesPen & paperNo one will see what you writeBe explicit, detailed & personalEmotional experiences, not just cognitive

Page 13: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Exercise #1

Photo by Keoni Cabral [link]

Page 14: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Discuss with your

Photo by Keoni Cabral [link]

partner

Page 15: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Stoicism

Photo by Martin Fisch [link]

Page 16: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Stoicism

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Not “stoicism”Equanimity ≠ weary resignation

Page 17: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Stoicism

Photo by Martin Fisch [link]

What is happiness?Equanimity & tranquility(Eudaimonia, not mere pleasure)

Page 18: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Stoicism

Photo by Martin Fisch [link]

Cultivate equanimity & tranquilityTurn toward negative emotions(Growth mindset)(Meta-emotion)

Page 19: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Stoicism

Photo by Martin Fisch [link]

Things do not touch the soul.Our perturbations come only

from the opinion which is within.

~Marcus Aurelius

Page 20: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Stoicism

Photo by Martin Fisch [link]

Distress stems from our beliefs & judgmentsTurn infinite fears into finite ones(Emotion management)(Mental models)

Page 21: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Exercise #2

Photo by Harsha K R [link]

Page 22: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Discuss with your

Photo by Harsha K R [link]

partner

Page 23: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Buddhism

Photo by Sarah J [link]

Page 24: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Buddhism

Photo by Sarah J [link]

Resisting our addiction to avoiding painBeing inquisitive & open to experience(Comfort with discomfort)(Mindfulness)

Page 25: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Buddhism

Photo by Sarah J [link]

What we call obstacles are really the waythe world teaches us where we’re

stuck.~Pema Chödrön

(Mental models)

Page 26: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Buddhism

Photo by Sarah J [link]

Seeking pleasure is an opportunity to observe

what we do in the face of pain.~Pema Chödrön

Page 27: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Buddhism

Photo by Sarah J [link]

A strong feeling will arise, and instead of

simply letting it be there, we panic.

~Pema Chödrön(Meta-emotion)

Page 28: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Buddhism

Photo by Sarah J [link]

Death is wanting to have every experience

confirm you and congratulate you andmake you feel completely

together.~Pema Chödrön

(Growth mindset)

Page 29: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Exercise #3

Photo by Mike Dish [link]

Page 30: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Discuss with your

Photo by Mike Dish [link]

partner

Page 31: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Logotherapy

Photo courtesy of Rafael Delsin [link]

Page 32: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

LogotherapyHappiness cannot be pursued; it must ensue.

~Viktor Frankl(At odds with positive

psychology?)

Page 33: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

LogotherapyMan’s search for meaning is the

primary motivation in his life.~Viktor Frankl

Page 34: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

LogotherapyConsistent with positive psychology?Eudaimonia > Mere pleasureAgency & responsibility

Page 35: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

LogotherapyIt is possible to practice the art of living

even in a concentration camp,although suffering is

omnipresent.~ Viktor Frankl

Page 36: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

LogotherapyEverywhere man is confronted with fate,

with the chance of achieving something through his own suffering.

~Viktor Frankl

Page 37: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Photo by Michael Bentley [link]

Thank yourpartner

Page 38: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

3 approachesWhich one is most relevant to you right now?Reflect

Page 39: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Photo by Horia Varlan [link]

Form smallgroupsStoics, Buddhists, LogotherapistsGroups of 5 or fewer

Page 40: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Photo by Horia Varlan [link]

Discuss with your group

How are these ideas relevant to me?What might I do with them?

Page 41: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Photo by Horia Varlan [link]

DebriefWhat did you learn?

Page 42: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

To sum up

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Many approaches beyond positive psychologyDifferent from, not opposed toLearning how you learn

Page 43: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

For next time…

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Page 44: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Class 8Success

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Page 45: Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: Unhappiness

Class 8SuccessSonja Lyubomirsky on mythsDavid Foster Wallace on valuesPeter Drucker on self-management…and an assignment